Cool - me own blog!

Well - rather than write huge outpourings of woe and angst, it's probably easier for me to do this blow by blow while on the road so the detail is preserved, and the sanity (and time) of anyone wanting to have a peek will remain relatively intact also. (That didn't make perfect sense but I'm jetlagged to hell - sue me!)

So I book some flights - off the Europe pretty much on the back of a US trip, home for 6 days then lift off again for 2 weeks on and near the continent.

I never fail to be amased at travel. I've been doing it for years - I know I'm prepared for most of the weird and wonderful situations it'll throw at me but I love to find those couple of oddities that insist on crossing my path. People can just be so... strange!

Lift-off at 1:00am for Singapore meant I was tired getting on the plane. A good way to be because I can sleep. Walking down to the gate (number 2 at Auckland in case that's relevant at all - to anyone - I thought not) I met leather woman.

Leatherman - That's a useful tool which is not allowed on planes. Leather woman well she shouldn't be allowed on planes either but only because of the threat to the mental health of those around her. She looked like shed somehow removed the skin of her face, neck and shoulders, and proceeded to bake it and tan it a chocolate brown colour before replacing the newly stretched, severely aged and wrinkled cover back onto herself. She was truly scary. I'm guessing she thought it's the height of fashion (and knowing my limitations as I do - she might be at the edge of fashion - I have no idea where it is)... but I'm guessing she is simply high maintenance combined with an unhealthy dose of insecurity, and about 50 years of UV radiation. NOT pretty.

Anyway - I recovered from that shock, got on the plane and sat next to Mr and Mrs... Patel? An Indian couple that own a dairy in Nelson. Who'd have thought... my every stereotype was reinforced in one sentence and it was all I could do to suppress a wry smile. Nice people... just - well... I think it's obvious they don't get out from behind the counter much.

About 2 hours before we landed we had a meal served, food comes out, I'm watching some movie (had some good sex scenes in it...) and he leans over and offers me his margarine.

Nothing else, just his margarine. I wasn't eating my toast, wasn't doing anything in fact - nothing to do with margarine anyway. But there it was, offered before me, a single serving of NZ Margarine for me to have if I wanted it. Not having anything in mind to do with said margarine (well - nothing decent, and certainly not involving him...!) I politely declined and went back to the movie, trying to catch up on the plot (like I was watching it for the plot to start with...!)

Aaaaa yes. Travel. Welcome to the weird and wonderful real world. C'mon in - the water's lovely. Actually, sitting here in the lounge in Singapore Airport I can confirm the water is actually plentiful - and outside. It's CHUCKING down.

At least it's warm. Next stop Paris. Not warm and according to weather.com it's not going to be dry either.

Oh Joy

MDU over and under!