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La Salope Noir

2015 tt2000

Rating: 5 votes, 5.00 average.
Mate, I dunno about you but I’m fair buggered.
The poster on the fridge in the smoko room at Suzuki NZ, Wanganui hit us like a bombshell. Rob Gardiner went on to explain what had happened and that understandably due to his medical condition Mike Hyde, the author of the Twisting Throttle books and the driving force behind the TT would not be there to wave us home.
It was a sobering moment reminding us how fickle and fragile life is; you never know when it’s going to stand up and give you a right old kick in the swannacles. Rob went on to tell us that both Mike and his wife Sandy wanted the TT to go ahead regardless. Nevertheless it was a subdued collection of nineteen riders who gathered their t-shirts and headed out the door.
If this TT was memorable for any other reason it was for my total over estimation of my capabilities. The formula I’d used for the previous four TT’s which had worked so well proved overly optimistic and it was obvious after the 3rd and 4th WPs that ‘Stretch’ and I were well behind schedule.
The 2015 TT had two separate routes, the South Island starting in Dunedin, the other in Wanganui with the finish for both at Hampton Motorcycles, Hornby. As with previous TT’s there are certain criteria to being ranked as a 'finisher':
1. Ride a minimum 2,000kms, and
2. Collect a minimum of 50,000 points, and
3. Arrive at the finish by 12.00pm on Sunday
Each checkpoint has a value of 500, 1000, 3000 or 5000 points according to its 'severity' rating. There are 50 checkpoints in both with a maximum, but unattainable, 100,000 points. There were also two ‘Mystery’ checkpoints worth 4000points to boost your points tally if you could find them. A four hour time buffer is invoked should you find yourself pushing it to get home in time; weather, punctures, late ferries, flat batteries, GPS’s which send you down the wrong road…any number of reasons can see a rider coming in after 12pm.
I caught up with Adrian Butler aka Stretch for breakfast in Wanganui where we discussed tactics and we were pretty much reading from the same page. Our first WP was back towards Wellington and a one room country school at the junction of Turakina Valley and Makuhau Rds. Willy Wilson was just departing as we arrived and we were to bump into Willy on his red and white Honda CB1300S from time to time over the next two days.
The 2nd WP was 127kms in the other direction towards Patea; the bridge at Makakaho Junction some 44clicks inland from Waiototara on SH3. It didn’t help sitting behind a mufti for much of the way until an impatient courier van overtook me then realised his mistake when he came abreast of the gunmetal grey Holden. With the way ahead now clear…
Back in Wanganui we refuelled and re-hydrated. Taking SH4 out of town we turned north onto the River Road towards Jerusalem and Pipiriki and this is where my carefully woven fabric began to unravel.
We had been warned by other riders but had put it down to pre-ride ‘misinformation’ to put us off the scent but those warnings turned out to be so very real. The River Road is narrow, tortured and twisted and much of it a single lane carved out of bluffs with precipitous drops to the river. Who gets to back up when two campervans meet on one of these sections of road I wonder? Described as ‘sealed’ the surface was often broken with loose gravel, frequent road works, strewn with Papa clay boulders and dry mud, meandering sheep and slow moving tourists but the scenery was stunning. By the time we’d ticked off WP2 and reached Raetihi we’d lost a fair amount of time. Was the 5000points we’d picked up at Ranana really worth it or had this buggered it up for us?
South of Raetihi we hung a left off SH4 on to Fields Track to find WP4 and although this road was sealed and reasonably free flowing, our average speed was still slower than I’d allowed for. Stretch nearly lost it all when he hit an unmarked patch of road works through a corner; the loose gravel sending him fish-tailing towards the long grass on the other side. Through good luck and a great deal of good management he recovered it nicely. Following behind I was able to avoid it but it was a close call all the same.
Another quick 500points and a photo of the carrot at Ohakune ticked off. It was 1830 and with only two hours of daylight left at best we decided to look at our options over a burger and a milkshake. Booking into the Top 10 and aiming to be back and tucked up by midnight, we decided to push on through the night and get as many of the WPs scattered around the central plateau as we could and while doing so hopefully claw back urgently needed kms.
WP5 was another 3000pointer 26km in/out to the bridge over the Manganui o te Ao river. Again a lovely ride…if only we had time to enjoy it. From there it was back to SH4 then north towards the Top of the Bruce at Whakapapa.
It was well dark by now but the romp along SH48 towards Rangipo Junction was actually quite enjoyable except for the rain, only it wasn’t rain, it was bugs! The air was thick with them so by the time we pulled up at Tree Trunk Gorge our visors were almost opaque.
Cleaning off the muck as best we could, we headed back to SH1 then turned northwards for the 1000points on offer at Tokaanu.
The school at Ngakonui, 11kms inland from Taumarunui was the next and also worth 3000. After a well-deserved 3P stop (petrol, pie and a pee) we rode south towards Ohakune picking up a quick 1000points at the Piriaka lookout on the way past.
It was around 0130 when I fell backwards on the bed only to be dragged awake by a persistent ringing four hours later.
“Did you see that animal that ran in front of me by National Park?”
“I did. What the hell was it?”
“It looked like a fox.”
We’d both seen it; our eyes weren’t playing tricks on us because it was distinctive enough for us to take notice but I’m buggered if I know what it was. Maybe a big feral cat.
A quick, hot shower and a breakfast of water and muesli bars while we got ready with the bikes warming up and we were back on the road by 0600.
The 3000points on offer at the Turoa ski field car park afforded us a spectacular view as the first flush of pink from the east painted the vista before us. How privileged are we to have a country like this to ride through, eh?
Picking up quick points between Tangiwai and Waiouru the next two WPs at Rangiwaea Junction and Mangaone Junction were worth 4000 between them but both were in & out on narrow, twisting country roads and despite accumulating points relatively smoothly we still behind schedule.
Grabbing the last 1000 on offer at the Mangaweka International Airport, we rode north to Taihape, filling both tanks, the bikes and ours, before taking the Taihape-Napier road otherwise known as ‘Gentle Annie’.
The first part of this road is perhaps one of the best motorcycle rides in the country; up hill, down dale, good seal and good visibility. It was a delight. Picking up the 4000 on offer at the Springvale suspension bridge we continued east but the going got tougher; the climb up and over the hill plagued with grit, bleeding and broken seal. Ngamatea Station, Kuripapango, tick tick; two more crossed off. Stopping at Sherenden school to gather up another 1000, a large tree afforded welcome shade and we stripped off while sucking back all the water we carried. It was well into the 30’s; a hot, unpleasant and unhealthy heat and I was sorely tempted to throw myself into the school pool, riding gear and all.
Willy pulled in as we were leaving the memorial at Omarunui.
The top of Te Mata Peak was the next on the list; the 3000points and the spectacular view offset by the crawl through suburbia to get there.
St Stephens church, Elsthorpe 51kms away was the next in our sights. We had passed Willy on his way up to the peak road so we were expecting to see his light in the mirrors soon.
I was as dry as a nun’s nasty; I needed water. Stopping in the shade outside the Patangata pub I bought two bottles. The first one never touched the sides and I was a good way through the second when Willy pulled up and the three of us talked for a bit while the sweat dried and we replaced what we had lost. A few minutes later Chris on his white ‘Busa and his three mates also pulled in under the shade of the one large tree. They also looked very hot and frayed around the edges.
“Where’s Te Mata Peak from here?”
“That way” I pointed.
“Dunno about you but I’m bloody hot” said one of the riders, pointing out the temp gauge on his Beemer was reading 33°C!
“You aint got that on your own.”
A brief nod, a flick of the visors back in place and they were off rather smartly.
The heat, dehydration, perhaps a degree of tiredness saw me once again second guessing my strategy as I was reminded of the shortcomings with my planning.
Looking good on paper from the comfort of my kitchen table I had calculated that I could double back to Maraekakaho on roads which according to Uncle Google were easy and fast flowing thereby picking up the 4000 on offer between there, Glendale, Kereru and Mangleton. But that was when everything was running to schedule. And why hadn’t I seen it would have been better to grab these after Omarunui? Now, it simply wasn’t feasible. With the clock rapidly running down we couldn’t afford to hang around. If we wanted to get the big pointers around Wellington before the ferry we’d also have to start heading south which meant flagging other WPs like at Flemington and ‘Taumata whakatangi hangakoauau o tamatea turi pukakapiki maunga horo nuku pokai whenua kitanatahu’.
“Look” said Willy, “follow me to Waipawa, gas up then you can shoot across and pick up Tikokino and Ongaonga.”
At Waipawa, Willy headed south and we headed west to Tikokino. At Ongaonga we calculated we could easily grab the 1000 on offer at Makaretu then duck across to Ormondville, Te Uri and Ngapaeruru. Not only would we pick up another 3000points but also gather valuable kms which added to the kms we’d do around the greater Capital area would give us enough of a buffer. Plus we’d join SH2 just south of Dannevirke putting us that much closer to Wellywood. Sounds like a plan, Stan!
Not wanting to get caught up in traffic over the Rimutaka’s we opted for the Manawatu Gorge and the inland route bypassing Levin which also meant we’d get to Titahi Bay before the gate to Whitireia reserve closed at 9pm. It proved to be the right option because we made good time even with a stop so Stretch could buy a lotto ticket.
It was blowing quite hard as we rode down to the foreshore. We used to come here as a family for picnics, swimming, snorkelling, great memories. It was a 4wd track back then, the old Vauxhall bouncing and bottoming out and with Mum and us walking ahead least the old man lost it.
A R1200GS rocked up just as we were about to leave the car park and the rider began quizzing Stretch about what we’d been up to and how many points we had which invoked the standard, politician’s reply of ‘talk a lot but say nothing’, that is not as good as we’d hoped, we’d had to flag quite a few WPs due to time and hopefully we have enough kms. A nodding, an understanding.
Topping up in Plimmerton we knocked off Battle Hill before heading over Haywards towards the Hutt Valley and Wainuiomata. I hadn’t been over this side in what, 30, 35 years? As for the Coast Rd to Turakirae Head, Lord knows. I had vague memories of it but it didn’t matter, it was dark and all I could see was the black top in front of me. Stretches’ FJR has far better lights than the Busa and by sitting behind him the combined candle power lit the road up pretty well. With 5000points added to our total it was back to Wainui, over the hill then left towards Eastbourne and the Wahine memorial. It was 2245 and with one more worth 5000 to get we headed back around the harbour to the CBD then climbed over the hill from Karori to South Makara and the end of the road at Kinnoull Station.
My dashboard clock clicked over midnight when we pulled into the BP station at the bottom of Taranaki Street to fill up, check my oil and give the chain a squirt of lube.
“Mate, I dunno about you but I’m fair buggered.”
Stripping off, it was hot chocolate and hot food while we took stock of what we’d done, made sure our points tally was the same and we’d ticked off all the WPs we’d done. There was a hydroponics farm bubbling away in my leathers and my T-shirt was sodden. I don’t know about Stretch but I stunk. If smell and taste are interconnected then I smelt like a packet of salt and vinegar chips. Even I found it unpleasant sitting with myself. Stretch didn’t look much better, his t-shirt clinging to him like a wet rag. A damp cloth wiped over the face didn’t achieve a lot but it did make you feel a little more human.
Despite feeling ragged we were pretty stoked at what we’d achieved in the North Island but it wasn’t over yet, there was still the last leg from Picton to Christchurch to do.
A number of taxis were lined up in the forecourt and their middle-eastern drivers were chattering away. When Stretch got up to grab some more food a young thing bursting out of a very tight, very short, white number took his seat. I couldn’t see her face, her head was bowed and turned away from me and her long dark hair hung down hiding it. The onset of cellulite exacerbated by goose bumps and frequent spasms of shivering wasn’t a good look. In fact she didn’t look at all well. After a while a cabbie came in, spoke to her softly and said he’d be back shortly to collect her. She left to be replaced by a red head who after a txt was off in the next available cab. Seems we weren’t the only ones completing endurance rides that night!
Rocking up to the ferry a little before 1am we checked in. Willy was there; he’d been there for a few hours and not long after the pair we’d bumped into at Ohakune on the KTM 1190R and R1150GS arrived and the guessing game began again; who’d done what and when and how many points and would we have enough kms?
The ferry was empty and it was easy enough to find a vacant piece of carpet. I snored my way across the Strait only waking when the call for ‘passengers with motor vehicles’ came over the tannoy.
The WPs at Seaview and Ward were a quick and easy 1500 and then it started to rain. By Kekerengu it was hissing down and I was soaked well before we stopped at the Puhipuhi DOC carpark. This wasn’t in the brochure! There were 5 riders taking photos and all looking a little bedraggled. Next to arrive was ‘Racing’ Dave on his GS.
On to Kaikoura where under the shelter of the forecourt for a quick splash-n-dash to see us home, there was also the urgent need for hot pies, hot coffees and those who hadn’t already, for putting the wets on over already wet gear. I figured it was pointless; I may have been satched but I was warm and besides it looked like it was clearing further to the south. The next WP was the decrepit old one lane bridge over the Conway on the Inland Scenic Route past Mt Lyford. I’d been down that road when it was wet and dark and it wasn’t at all pleasant. Being daylight removed one big negative from that equation.
Nevertheless it was a slow and cautious trip to Waiau. It was still drizzling off and on making an attempt to clear but never actually achieving it. Grabbing the last 4000 ‘mystery’ points at Waikari and with just under an hour of time left, we decided to flag the WP at Scargill. We’d ridden hard and long hours to achieve what we had so to come in late for the sake of another 1000points wasn’t an option. I wanted to finish and finish within time.
Grabbing the quick 500points on offer at Frog Rock it was high 5’s all round before making a bee-line for Hornby. Heavy traffic slowed us through Woodend, Belfast and Johns Road but Stretch and I and the others pulled into the forecourt at Hampton Motorcycles with 28minutes to spare. The choice to flag the Scargill WP had been the right one.
The elation of finishing something like this can only be experienced. We handed in our score sheets and to ease the congestion agreed to email the photos in. We'd knocked over 90,000points and were pretty stoked.
There was relief to see those others we’d criss-crossed paths with had also arrived safely and an agreement we’d see each other at the start next year.
If there was one dampening to the finish, other than the weather, was that Mr Throttle Esq. wasn’t on hand to wave us in. It wasn’t the same without Mike.
On behalf of Stretch and myself I’d like to thank Mike’s team for stepping up in his absence to ensure the TT went ahead.
To Mike and Sandy, our thoughts are with you both, and Mike we pray for a speedy recovery. This one was for you Mr Throttle.
Chris ‘Captain carefree’ Carey, #3497
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Comments

  1. awa355's Avatar
    I enjoyed your write up. Thanks for posting.
  2. insomnia01's Avatar
    was a good ride in my humble opinion