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YellowDog
3rd June 2009, 06:19
A couple were on their honeymoon, lying in bed, about ready to consummate their marriage, when the new bride says to the husband, "I have a confession to make, I'm not a virgin."
The husband replies, "That's no big thing in this day and age."
The wife continues, "Yeah, I've been with one guy."
"Oh yeah? Who was the guy?"
"Tiger Woods."
"Tiger Woods, the golfer?"
"Yeah."
"Well, he's rich, famous and handsome. I can see why you went to bed with him."
The husband and wife then make passionate love. When they are done, the husband gets up and walks to the telephone.
"What are you doing?" asks the wife.
The husband says, "I'm hungry, I was going to call room service and get something to eat."
"Tiger wouldn't do that."
"Oh yeah? What would Tiger do?"
"He'd come back to bed and do it a second time."
The husband puts down the phone and goes back to bed to make love a second time.
When they finish, he gets up and goes over to the phone.
"Now what are you doing?" She asks.
The husband says, "I'm still hungry so I was going to get room service to get something to eat."
"Tiger wouldn't do that."
"Oh yeah? What would Tiger do?"
"He'd come back to bed and do it again."
The guy slams down the phone, goes back to bed, and makes love one more time.
When they finish he's tired and beat. He drags himself over to the phone and starts to dial.
The wife asks, "Are you calling room service?"
"No! I'm calling Tiger Woods, to find out what's par for this damn hole!"

slofox
3rd June 2009, 14:05
hehehe...excellent!

kevfromcoro
3rd June 2009, 14:30
Sam was walking home through the park. and he heard a voice in the bushes.
20 bucks how about it..
Sam had never been with a hooker before .. but he thought its only 20 dollars
They are at it for a few minutes and a police officer comes along.
whats going on here he says. and shines a torch in there eyes.
Its ok iam just haveing sex my wife says sam.
Oh ok says the officer.. i didnt realise.
Neither did I says sam.. untill you shone that fucken torch in her face