The opening tale of an epic journey

[Insanity_rules]

Come gather dear friends and I'll share with you the tale of a brave knight of kiwibiker who is summoned to a great journey.

Once upon a time in old Wellingtown there was a brave knight of Kiwibiker. He was reknowned throughout the kingdom as a skilled wizard in the art of computing machines. Our hero recieved a distress message from the far off land of Auck. "Oh please good sir, your skill is legendary and our computing machines appear to be possesed with an evil spirit" Implored the customer "Please make the journey to the land of Auck to rid us of this menace". So our mighty hero is to make the journey from Wellingtown to the land of Auck on his trusty italian thoroughbred.

Now good lords and ladies of kiwibiker in the land of Auck, wilst thou break bread with our noble hero, hoist high a tankard of ale and swap tales of daring and inspiration to keep our hero company whilst he is so far from his home. He will be there on the eve of Thursday and would like to meet others of his order and perhaps be shown the sights of this far off land.

Many thanks to you in advance.

[Foxzee]

Careful....they might not let you out again before you turn into a pumpkin....lol

Oh and don't lose your glass slipper under their beds....:lol:

[Mom]

Many thanks to you in advance.

I suppose we could arrange something :cool:

[Hiflyer]

Was it just me that read that entire post with an old english accent inside my head!? haha :clap:

[junkmanjoe]

A message from our beloved princess...
from castle wellingtonia

ride forth and safe our hero of the south.
watch for thieves and robbers, whom may wish you harm upon your journey north across forgotten fields.
bed down with our fellow tribes men, and women, have a hearty fest and wallow in pools of wine..

Slay the evil spirit of Auck,
and return to our fine lands unharmed ready for your next battle...
enjoy your journey,


JMJ

[Laxi]

So our mighty hero is to make the journey from Wellingtown to the land of Auck on his trusty italian thoroughbred.


mate!!! what ya gonna do if it rains? :dodge:

[madmal64]

I bid thee fair journey on thy fine Italian stted.
May thee travel swiftly and the journey be filled with joy and pleasure.
Return saftely and in good heart to our fair kingdom

[Insanity_rules]

Was it just me that read that entire post with an old english accent inside my head!? haha :clap:

I kinda heard lute music and saw folk dancing.


I suppose we could arrange something :cool:

Thanks Mom.


mate!!! what ya gonna do if it rains? :dodge:

Ah same thing you do, get wet.

[gijoe1313]

Hark and forsooth, the alarums do ring and the herald voices that a champion arises from the south!

Hail and well met yonder questing knight of renown, lend ye strength of arms against the wickedness and shiver the will of evil doings. Keen be your edge and loud may your steed proclaim its mastery of the travelled roads.

Keep ye well from scurrilous knaves and characters of ill-repute for no good tidings will come of it! Let there be a candle lit in the lead-framed windows so ye may sup and dine your weary bones on your termination of the journey up.

So saddle up and arm your terrible panoply of riding, let grimness set your visage and may you overcome the terrible metal dragons on your way through the middle of our isle. Long may your ride clatter! Gird your loins, for daring deeds thou dost deign to deliver!

[Voltaire]

Whence thee reach the town of Awkland, time being in hand, send forth thine message and I shall ride forth on my own Italian steed to meet for an ale....and speeketh of the rubber banded and bevel driveth ones.

Beware of the mighty snake that controlleth the southeren entry to Awkland late in the hour, it doeth vanish upon the setting of the sun.
:rolleyes:

[Maha]

We will be there (where ever there may be) to toast the mighty noble one of Wellingtonshire or parts thereof.

[LBD]

I can only think of one comment after reading that....INSANITY RULES!....and not from the south.

[Insanity_rules]

Come gather dear friends and I'll regail you of the lastest happening of this epic journey. When we last left our hero he was proclaiming the journey and seeking cortege in the far off land of Auck. Now our had hero decided to inspect his steed, as his destination is afar, ardous and filled with peril.

Sir Insanity did scrutinize the hind quarters and did find that his certificate of fitness had passed its expiry date. With a cacophonous oath that shook the very stable, brought into question the parentage of his steed and did cause the good folk of his shire much embarrasment Sir Insanity decided to communicate with the local blacksmith in order to retain the legality of his mount. "Pray good smithy, couldst thou inspect my steed so as to facilitate my safe passage to the far of land of Auck. My Stallion is much admired my lord, lady and knave alike and not having the certificate would cause me to pay tribute to the sheriff of our land".

The smithy replied "Mark what are you talking about? Do you want us to warrant your bike so you can go on your business trip on Wednesday? Jeez your annoying after you've had a lord of the rings marathon".
Now our hero being very upset by this time proclaimed "See here good smithy quiet thy tongue and bid me a time of inspection so that I my proceed on my voyage".

So on the day of Tues our hero shall be gaining his certificate of fitness. Most excellent! Our hero shall be pleased to make court in the far of land of Auck.

[Genie]

May your journey be filled with laughter and merriment. you are indeed a brave knight.

[Usarka]

Be forewarned for 20 leagues before the kingdom of Auckland lies a single road.

This frightfull stretch be called MordorWay and many a fearless knight has fled in terror from it's inhabitants. On this path lives the first of many horrors ye must defeat in order to reach the golden house of ale - the Black Night (rod)!

[gijoe1313]

Ahh so the sword of Damocles hangs heavy upon thy mien, and with strength of character dost has passed thy first test of many! Remember, avoid the snakes along the verges, be weary of the snakes dripped in tar which are festooned liberally upon your trail, watch ye well for the mark of caning, its numerals exact a toll upon those who trespass its borders!

Yonder quest does beckon, sharpen thy steel, polish thy armour, don your coat of arms and prepare for adventure!

[StoneY]

I kinda heard lute music and saw folk dancing.
Same here, even saw the court Jester...his name funnily enough (in my trip anyway) was Mark








Ah same thing you do, get wet.

But what about the Ducati?
You FIEND!
How dareth thou treateththy steed with such ignoble spirit!

[BMWST?]

if one were to aquire the current flag in a game of much cunning and guile called the Aukland Tag O Rama ones reputation would be much enhanced and tales of your deeds would be told far and wide.

[Gremlin]

So where the hell are you going to be on Thursday?

[Insanity_rules]

So where the hell are you going to be on Thursday?

I arrive in Auckland on Thursday morning. Staying in West harbour.

When we last lefth our hero he had secured a certificate of fitness for his steed. Now all didst not proceed quite to plan as Sir Insanity had to moveth his indication lights forward so that they were visible from a 45 degree angle on the opposite side (curseth thy aftermarket domes).

So on the morrow our hero shall ride forth to the land of Papanui Beach for a course in battle then onward to the mysterious land of Auck.

Readyth thy feasting, lighteth thy candles and prepareth thy ale as where Sir Insanity doth arrive, merriment is surely to ensue. Celebration needth to follow this mighty task.

[Shadows]

I've got a fucking headache.

[gijoe1313]

Verily the questing hero has spoken true, upon the nonce he shall make his triumphant appearance, barring civil imposition on his progress, the angelic choir of alarums issuing forth from his steed's emissions will bespoke his progress towards his destination.

Proclaim it forth and ride proudly sirrah, as we jostle and bustle about our daily chores, glad tidings and most felicitous of welcome we do bear deeply in our hearts for thee!

[Hans]

Be wary of Sir Ginga, sheriff of Nothingham, on ye journey.

[Mikkel]

Come gather dear friends and I'll share with you the tale of a brave knight of kiwibiker who is summoned to a great journey.

Once upon a time in old Wellingtown there was a brave knight of Kiwibiker. He was reknowned throughout the kingdom as a skilled wizard in the art of computing machines. Our hero recieved a distress message from the far off land of Auck. "Oh please good sir, your skill is legendary and our computing machines appear to be possesed with an evil spirit" Implored the customer "Please make the journey to the land of Auck to rid us of this menace". So our mighty hero is to make the journey from Wellingtown to the land of Auck on his trusty italian thoroughbred.

Now good lords and ladies of kiwibiker in the land of Auck, wilst thou break bread with our noble hero, hoist high a tankard of ale and swap tales of daring and inspiration to keep our hero company whilst he is so far from his home. He will be there on the eve of Thursday and would like to meet others of his order and perhaps be shown the sights of this far off land.

Many thanks to you in advance.

For a second I though "Huh, has Jim bought an italian...?" But then I read the bit about Auckland and realised we must be talking about someone with less sense than him.

Piss taking aside, have a nice trip!

[Laxi]

most felicitous of welcome

who's suckin what????:shutup:

[Insanity_rules]

who's suckin what????:shutup:

No your thinking of felatio.

So dear friends our hero has bested the demons of the computing machines, indulged in libations with the brave knights of Auckland and proclaimed mastery of the routes hither and yon. Much thanks to Lord Maha, Lady Mom and Sir Voltaire for your company. A good meal and good conversion was had by all even if my meal was abnormal, Thanks Mom.

[StoneY]

So, in 21st century'ees, you made it to Jaffaland and got pissed with some cool KBers right?


Neat

:niceone:

[Maha]

No your thinking of felatio.

So dear friends our hero has bested the demons of the computing machines, indulged in libations with the brave knights of Auckland and proclaimed mastery of the routes hither and yon. Much thanks to Lord Maha, Lady Mom and Sir Voltaire.

You forgot about Barney....:lol:


So, in 21st century'ees, you made it to Jaffaland and got pissed with some cool KBers right?


Neat

:niceone:

Some would not class Albany as Jafaland, indeed they even have there own provincial rugby team known as North Harbour...:cool:

[Laxi]

You forgot about Barney....:lol:



Some would not class Albany as Jafaland

nafaland then?:lol:
good to see ya made it there in 1 piece mark, and the locals didn't linch ya:2thumbsup

[2wheeldrifter]

So where the hell are you going to be on Thursday?


Thou art a peasant! :girlfight:

[Voltaire]

Some would not class Albany as Jafaland, indeed they even have there own provincial rugby team known as North Harbour...:cool:


T'was a good outing, venturing North on the " one with no valvesprings" to the place known as Albany. The alehouse had refreshments known to the Southern men as Speights...which was found to be refreshing and I found myself uttering mate at the endeth of sentences.
Have a good journey back to Wellington, and remain off the trail known to all as SH1 as much as possible.
Post up some images of the stickers when you have adheared them to your mount.
You are also invited to join BFTP as you have a ( moments slience) Norton Commando.