I just bent over and... [Archive]

Maha

26th January 2010, 13:47

had a very cute & petite, young Asian girlie stick her finger up my bum. :buggerd: And it wasn't my misses. :eek:

Tis the year I should get it done.....:cool:

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GOONR

26th January 2010, 13:49

Bingo! If ya gotta get it done, get it done by a cute, young Asian girlie doctor. :D

Buggered if I'm gonna have some old guy stick his stinky digit up ma bum. :(

Either your older than I thought or you have health issues..

mashman

26th January 2010, 13:50

had a very cute & petite, young Asian girlie stick her finger up my bum. :buggerd: And it wasn't my misses. :eek:

did you offer to return the favour...

slofox

26th January 2010, 13:51

Buggered if I'm gonna have some old guy stick his stinky digit up ma bum. :(

They SAY it's their finger they use...

SpankMe

26th January 2010, 13:52

QUICK! MUST TELL THE INTERNET!

Best to let'em know it ain't that bad (with the right doctor). As importatnt for guys as breast exams are for girlies.

SpankMe

26th January 2010, 13:53

did you offer to return the favour...

Bugger, didn't think of that. Could of given her a finger smear test. :p

Tank

26th January 2010, 13:56

You know that they can do this by taking bloods now - right?

MSTRS

26th January 2010, 13:58

Fort Street by any chance, oh no, wait.. they aint petite.. or cute...

...or girls?

SpankMe

26th January 2010, 13:59

You know that they can do this by taking bloods now - right?

But there's a good chance of false positive. Best to get a physical exam first.

bogan

26th January 2010, 14:00

Best to let'em know it ain't that bad (with the right doctor). As importatnt for guys as breast exams are for girlies.

wait till they have to poke around there with a flashlight :shit: I shit you not, they have a special little (though it doesnt fucking fell little) flashlight for it.

2_SL0

26th January 2010, 17:28

wait till they have to poke around there with a flashlight :shit: I shit you not, they have a special little (though it doesnt fucking fell little) flashlight for it.

They aint going pot holing (caving) in my ass, it is not the Waitomo caves.

stify

26th January 2010, 18:09

But there's a good chance of false positive. Best to get a physical exam first.

good on ya....after riding hondas for many a year now I thought I was ready for said exam.....spooky stuff

Jonathan

26th January 2010, 18:23

At what age do you chaps think it is best to start getting your bits checked out (inside and out)?

Pussy

26th January 2010, 18:23

wait till they have to poke around there with a flashlight :shit: I shit you not, they have a special little (though it doesnt fucking fell little) flashlight for it.

Did you get the "Maxi Mag-lite" treatment? :whistle:

reemit

26th January 2010, 18:33

At what age do you chaps think it is best to start getting your bits checked out (inside and out)?

That depends entirely on who's doin the checkin!

Jonathan

26th January 2010, 18:45

That depends entirely on who's doin the checkin!

I thought I might need to add "by a professional". I trust my missus' judgement when it comes to what goes into a good spaghetti bolognese but not so much when it comes to what my prostate should feel like! (also, not an experience I want to repeat any time in the future!)

I ask because a friend of mine had a boyfriend who was diagnosed with testicular cancer when he was 23. I would rather have some old doctor do a bit of prodding and cupping now than to have one doing some snipping and cutting later.

EJK

26th January 2010, 18:45

Words from someone else.

"Just had a prostate test.it aint pleasant .. the doc told me to take my pants down.and bend over...felt his finger go in my backside.then i felt 2 arms on my shoulder...WTF..SHIT Happens"

reemit

26th January 2010, 18:53

I thought I might need to add "by a professional". I trust my missus' judgement when it comes to what goes into a good spaghetti bolognese but not so much when it comes to what my prostate should feel like! (also, not an experience I want to repeat any time in the future!)

I ask because a friend of mine had a boyfriend who was diagnosed with testicular cancer when he was 23. I would rather have some old doctor do a bit of prodding and cupping now than to have one doing some snipping and cutting later.

How worried are you J? If you're not worried then 50 was what my doc said depending if you smoke or do what Lance Armstrong does.
If you are really worried then make an appointment tomorrow! It goes by the worry factor when you are younger apparently.

Kiwi Graham

26th January 2010, 18:56

Just had the blood test and waiting the results. I checked the size of mr Dr's fingers, I fukin hope those blood tests are sweet!

Pussy

26th January 2010, 18:58

Just had the blood test and waiting the results. I checked the size of mr Dr's fingers, I fukin hope those blood tests are sweet!

They'll probably be inconclusive....

Sorry, Graham.... it's the "Golfinger" for you! :niceone:

Mikkel

26th January 2010, 18:58

Buggered if I'm gonna have some old guy stick his stinky digit up ma bum. :(

Well, at least it'll be stinky on the return trip...

But there's a good chance of false positive. Best to get a physical exam first.

...I think it's called the G-spot mate. Use any excuse you want.

I ask because a friend of mine had a boyfriend who was diagnosed with testicular cancer when he was 23. I would rather have some old doctor do a bit of prodding and cupping now than to have one doing some snipping and cutting later.

Heh, having an ultra-sonic scan of your testicles is an interesting experience. ...yes, they a water-based lubricant to ensure proper contact to the probe. (they even have this awesome holder for preheating the lubricant to make it more comfortable, best mother's day present EVER! :2thumbsup)

P38

26th January 2010, 19:03

...or girls?

Hahahahaha

Speaking from experience are ya MSTRS ? :innocent: :msn-wink:

Jonathan

26th January 2010, 19:04

Nah, not worried. 50 it is then, good few years away yet.

Ultrasonic testicle scan sounds intriguing though. Reminds me of this electrified butt-plug I saw in a sex shop once...

Okay, Imma gonna shutup now.

oldrider

26th January 2010, 19:05

Women have no idea of the indignities we men have to endure! :shutup:

Maha

26th January 2010, 19:07

good on ya....after riding hondas for many a year now I thought I was ready for said exam.....spooky stuff

Come on then Mark, we could make it a Tag Team.....

Pussy

26th January 2010, 19:16

Come on then Mark, we could make it a Tag Team.....

You weren't smiling when you had the "digital" were you, Maha?? :whistle:

Maha

26th January 2010, 19:18

You weren't smiling when you had the "digital" were you, Maha?? :whistle:

No, but ones mind does tend to wander.....:confused:

Hitcher

26th January 2010, 19:59

And it wasn't my misses.

Seeing that she hit the target first go, there weren't any misses involved, unless the lady in question was archaicly unmarried. One suspects that you are perhaps referring to your missus?

duckonin

26th January 2010, 20:19

Women have no idea of the indignities we men have to endure! :shutup:

Ha, but look at what they go through at times, and every one gets to look .......

sinfull

26th January 2010, 20:46

50 was what my doc said .
Woooo hoooo !!!
Whats that Asian doc's name Spank ??

Nah, not worried. 50 it is then, good few years away yet.

Ultrasonic testicle scan sounds intriguing though. Reminds me of this electrified butt-plug I saw in a sex shop once...

Okay, Imma gonna shutup now. Sounds like you'll scratch that itch way before 50 !!!

Gareth51

26th January 2010, 21:32

had a very cute & petite, young Asian girlie stick her finger up my bum. :buggerd: And it wasn't my missus. :eek:

Me too and it wasn't my doctor

riffer

26th January 2010, 21:48

Geez Ash you're a week or so younger than me dude. I wasn't aware it was something us fellas in our early 40s had to do. Wonder why my doctor hasn't said anything yet...

Laxi

26th January 2010, 21:52

why was I expecting to see fatt max lurking in here???

mynameis

26th January 2010, 21:58

Did you have fun when you going back for the next one ? :lol:

kevfromcoro

26th January 2010, 22:29

Got that done a few months ago
Blood ,, and the finger jobbie.
sort of fells like someone has shoved an uncooked carrot in your backside.. only lasts a few hours...
As we are getting a bit mature.. it seems to be a necessity of life.
My Brother copped it at sixty five, clean living bloke he is/ and his wife is a nurse.
ended up in a place in Melbourne.. where they put him in a lead room.. and he got bombarded with radiation things. fixed hin though. cost a few bob.
just about my doctor.. she was a lady in her mid fiftys.. youst to lecture me about drinking too much... smoking too much. eating all the wrong food.
which i do.. she was miss prim and proper....
did everything by the book
well she dropped dead about a month ago...
hang on...... give me a another cream bun.. a beer and a box of smokes..

rainman

26th January 2010, 23:13

Seeing that she hit the target first go, there weren't any misses involved, unless the lady in question was archaicly unmarried. One suspects that you are perhaps referring to your missus?

Isn't a bit odd, the BDOTGNZA making an appearance on a thread like this? :)

LBD

27th January 2010, 01:36

Bingo! If ya gotta get it done, get it done by a cute, young Asian girlie doctor. :D

Buggered if I'm gonna have some old guy stick his stinky digit up ma bum. :(

Their clean finger up your stinky bum is probably more correct

You know that they can do this by taking bloods now - right?

Been said a couple of time ....Blood tests are only so accurate...the experienced digit is much more reliable....

They aint going pot holing (caving) in my ass, it is not the Waitomo caves.

May be not yours butt I am sure a few on here resemble waitomo caves

Geez Ash you're a week or so younger than me dude. I wasn't aware it was something us fellas in our early 40s had to do. Wonder why my doctor hasn't said anything yet...

You really think your Doc fancies the idea...giving you the ole Hopoati?

I am told if there is a family history...start at 40, if not 50

Had a prostate infection once...got the digit treatment and it felt like Colin Meads kicked me in the goulies....All credit to the doc however, two previous docs failed to diagnose,....he was a visiting locom who happend to be a mens health specialist, put his finger right on the mark...so to speak. Had to get Govt permission for this special antibiotic....after two months of pain it cleared up in two days.

Now, just relax....

Maha

27th January 2010, 08:20

Could a Home Examination be done?
Like women do checking for lumps in their breast while taking a shower?
Just a thought.

stify

27th January 2010, 16:07

Could a Home Examination be done?

Just a thought.

why yes it could...I'm coming up to snells sat arvo if that suits...honda bruthas unite ;)

Mom

27th January 2010, 16:21

why yes it could...I'm coming up to snells sat arvo if that suits...honda bruthas unite ;)

Come and say hi?

Pussy

27th January 2010, 16:25

Come and say hi?

I think he plans being a LOT friendlier than that!!......

Mom

27th January 2010, 16:50

I think he plans being a LOT friendlier than that!!......

Yes I expect he will actually come and say hiiieeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Maha

27th January 2010, 17:48

I think he plans being a LOT friendlier than that!!......

And with a name like Stify should I be worried?

Pussy

27th January 2010, 19:32

And with a name like Stify should I be worried?

It all sounds a bit suss.... and he seems fairly keen.... that's all I'm saying

kwaka_crasher

28th January 2010, 10:50

But there's a good chance of false positive.

at which time you then get the digital examination (sounds high-tech but really isn't...).

But you're not really doing it for health reasons, are you...

Kiwi Graham

28th January 2010, 11:06

Bloods came back with a PSA of .26 so no digit up the figit for me.
What prompted me was my father getting diagnosed last week wth prostate cancer.

Got the all clear so all good, apparently if you get a score of .9 or below you stand little chance of getting it.
Still makes sense for us mature chaps to get the old 'well man' check each year.

PrincessBandit

28th January 2010, 11:57

had a very cute & petite, young Asian girlie stick her finger up my bum. :buggerd: And it wasn't my missus. :eek:

But you didn't tell us whether or not you actually enjoyed it Spank!

Seriously, us women have all sorts of things poked into us, scraped out of us, pushed out of us.....(but I digress) and the public education on women's health issues have made it far more acceptable for us to talk about it, follow up with med exams etc. Should be no different for blokes.

Right, I'm off to phone the doc as I'm 6 months overdue for my smear test. (hahahaha, just to make you all rush off and empty the contents of your stomachs)

kwaka_crasher

28th January 2010, 13:29

Still makes sense for us mature chaps to get the old 'well man' check each year.

Thankfully I'll never be mature.

avgas

28th January 2010, 13:39

Come on spank. This is the internets....
pics or it didn't happen ;)
Just make sure you photochop yourself out :)

stify

28th January 2010, 18:50

It all sounds a bit suss.... and he seems fairly keen.... that's all I'm saying

hey...I'm always willing to lend a hand when the call goes out..;)

stify

28th January 2010, 18:53

And with a name like Stify should I be worried?

no more than you would be normally.....trust me...I know what I'm doing :)

stify

28th January 2010, 18:55

Come and say hi?

I'll be making a point of passing by your place....I hope my memory will serve me well otherwise I may end up at some randoms house....

The Stranger

28th January 2010, 18:56

You know that they can do this by taking bloods now - right?

Hey, he's in IT, of course he's going digital.

crazyhorse

29th January 2010, 09:59

Come on spank. This is the internets....
pics or it didn't happen ;)
Just make sure you photochop yourself out :)

:rofl: :rofl: not actually sure we would want a pic...... :killingme

Pussy

29th January 2010, 14:49

hey...I'm always willing to lend a hand when the call goes out..;)

Hey stify.... we haven't met yet.
You won't be offended if we don't shake hands when we do get to catch up, will you?? :whistle:

Geemsee

29th January 2010, 15:14

had a very cute & petite, young Asian girlie stick her finger up my bum. :buggerd: And it wasn't my missus. :eek:

Blimey, that's a bit of a coincidence, I was just browsing on the net and came across this guy that had his whole arm up some Aussie birds butt!?!? :shit:

http://www.povonline.com/cols/COL236.htm

Its a crazy world!!

stify

29th January 2010, 17:14

Hey stify.... we haven't met yet.
You won't be offended if we don't shake hands when we do get to catch up, will you?? :whistle:

gee wiz, you're from new plymouth and ya wana be fussy who's hand ya shake??...If we ever do meet I'll just give ya hug then ;)

LBD

29th January 2010, 17:19

When looking at the search page, I normally read the title and the Author in middle of the next line down. In this case it reads...."I JUST BENT OVER AND SPANK ME"

Well I thought it was funny....

Pussy

29th January 2010, 17:51

gee wiz, you're from new plymouth and ya wana be fussy who's hand ya shake??...If we ever do meet I'll just give ya hug then ;)

Oh no you bloody won't!!
Happy to catch up some time.... but with a few ground rules!! :)

stify

29th January 2010, 18:17

Oh no you bloody won't!!
Happy to catch up some time.... but with a few ground rules!! :)

I'll borrow a suzuki if that helps...;)

ynot slow

30th January 2010, 08:15

Don't worry mostly they do blood test first,then explore if needed apparently(never had prostate test,be the only test ya want to fail),talked to an old guy a year ago about his prostate,he left it a bit late,had radiation etc,but no good,so his prognosis was remove the boys,bit rational but he said no balls and alive,have balls and be dead,and he said doing it at 75yr meant he'd had enough use of his testosterone,he reckoned it was karma for castrating/gelding his bulls and colts.

Wait till you need a colonoscopy,woohoo drink 3-4ltrs of pikoprep or similar to clean out system,asked the nurse what size lens was on the camera,she said it was quite a vivid,narrow type,phew I said thought it might be a wide angle,she said no(all serious etc),so I said glad to hear,my 35mm camera is quitewide in the body,she then nearly pissed herself realising I was joshing her.Then she gave me the sleepy juice and my comedy act went quiet.

KiWiP

30th January 2010, 08:33

Did you get the "Maxi Mag-lite" treatment? :whistle: Or was it a camping headlight? :D

But seriously folks - much info here http://www.moh.govt.nz/moh.nsf/indexmh/cancercontrol-publications-prostate . Links to consultation docs very good.

Beyond 40 is good time to think about getting checked (1 in 500 get it in their 40s) and if anyone in your family has had it chances go up a lot.

Any way back to reality. Whenever I get checked up I expect them to set the mood with a candles, a crisp cold Chablis and 1/2 a dozen oysters. Well that's what they expect from me before I go wanging anything up their nether regions. :laugh:

Pussy

30th January 2010, 08:56

Any way back to reality. Whenever I get checked up I expect them to set the mood with a candles, a crisp cold Chablis and 1/2 a dozen oysters. Well that's what they expect from me before I go wanging anything up their nether regions. :laugh:

And call you afterwards.....maybe send you flowers....