Brian d marge
19th May 2010, 02:22
:shit:
Posted this here as I am not sure if this is funny or WTF,,,,,, anyway ..........Our new house and all I wanted to do is make a cup of tea!
As some maybe know, we have been building a new house and as you do you get new "stuff" as it all goes on the the never never. Well in our case. toilets, washing machines microwaves. Well you get the idea.
So no here I am, a person of many years " a learning stuff" and the cooker wont let me make a cup of tea. now in its defense The instruction book is written in Japanese ( I can read and write to a basic level ) but it was translated from Swahili to Japanese then to the same data format that NASA retrieved from the voyager probe.
The microwave has three buttons none of which bear any relation to each other or any function known to mortal man. After 20 min trying to push differing combinations of the said three buttons, I gave up and walked to the 7/11 and got a convene burger.
This started the next in the chain of events, I needed to expel the afore mentioned burger. One would use a toilet for this. Ours has 11 buttons on the side , senses when you sit, heats up the water and apparently washes you arse with a nice soothing flow of warm water
I wouldn't know, its been talking to the washing machine, as the washing machine has been flashing a sequence of light from the dashboard copied from the space ship enterprise. If the toilet has delusions of grandeur, then my arse is toast if I use it , the garden is safer.
Right now "She who shouts" is on the telephone to this really nice lady who I this either drinks to much Gin in the afternoons or works on the help desk of the company who makes the tv and Video recorder, For a laugh we decided to watch a video, I gave up and started this diatribe
Well camping stove has boiled the water and at last i can have a nice cup of tea
If by the odd chance you know either a merchant banker OR and appliance designer. Please inform them of the distinct possibility of Painful retribution come the revolution
Stephen
Posted this here as I am not sure if this is funny or WTF,,,,,, anyway ..........Our new house and all I wanted to do is make a cup of tea!
As some maybe know, we have been building a new house and as you do you get new "stuff" as it all goes on the the never never. Well in our case. toilets, washing machines microwaves. Well you get the idea.
So no here I am, a person of many years " a learning stuff" and the cooker wont let me make a cup of tea. now in its defense The instruction book is written in Japanese ( I can read and write to a basic level ) but it was translated from Swahili to Japanese then to the same data format that NASA retrieved from the voyager probe.
The microwave has three buttons none of which bear any relation to each other or any function known to mortal man. After 20 min trying to push differing combinations of the said three buttons, I gave up and walked to the 7/11 and got a convene burger.
This started the next in the chain of events, I needed to expel the afore mentioned burger. One would use a toilet for this. Ours has 11 buttons on the side , senses when you sit, heats up the water and apparently washes you arse with a nice soothing flow of warm water
I wouldn't know, its been talking to the washing machine, as the washing machine has been flashing a sequence of light from the dashboard copied from the space ship enterprise. If the toilet has delusions of grandeur, then my arse is toast if I use it , the garden is safer.
Right now "She who shouts" is on the telephone to this really nice lady who I this either drinks to much Gin in the afternoons or works on the help desk of the company who makes the tv and Video recorder, For a laugh we decided to watch a video, I gave up and started this diatribe
Well camping stove has boiled the water and at last i can have a nice cup of tea
If by the odd chance you know either a merchant banker OR and appliance designer. Please inform them of the distinct possibility of Painful retribution come the revolution
Stephen