Good Heavens

[Maha]

Today I had my first ever experience of a Catholic Funeral.
I came away thinking '' what the hell was that''?
Ok, it was a Reqiem Mass (another first) but from where I stood/sat/stood/sat/stood/sat/stood (and that was just first half) it all seemed directed at the Big Two or Three upstairs.
Not alot said about the deceased, well family members 3-4 got up and spoke but on the whole it was all the Religion and on death itself. Throw in a couple of staple hyms and there you have it.
Very very odd experience for me...
Even the words 'thy' was changed to 'your'....ie: thy kingdom becomes....your kingdom.
And whats with the term ''eat my body and drink my blood'' from the Priest?
Come on fulla, there were kids there.

Amen.

[admenk]

It all depends what you're used to I suppose. Yes, some of the language and terminology can seem a bit strange, and I've been going to church services of one kind or another most of my life. Not a Catholic myself, but I guess the deceased was, so it would have complied with their beliefs and wishes. I've also been to some "secular" funerals that have been totally strange, but at the end of the day, I suppose you're attending out of respect for the deceased and their family. It's probably a good job we're all different or the world would be a boring place. The main thing is that you went.

[rustyrobot]

Heh. I had a similar experience a couple of years back. Felt like the funeral was more of an advert for the church than a celebration of the life of the deceased. My cousin got married a little while back and that was the same deal. Talked far more about Jesus than they did about the people getting married. Each to their own I suppose.

Is it too morbid to ask what your ideal service would be Maha?

[avgas]

Have to admit that the church has come forward a large bit.
For a start people are no longer burned at the stake.

[avgas]

Talked far more about Jesus than they did about the people getting married. Each to their own I suppose.
I got married at the registry office. Pissed my highly Christian family off.
Ended it all with good Japanese food and moonlight ride with the new wife.
Was a good day.

[Duke girl]

I also went to a Catholic Funeral the other day and l felt the same way you did, Not much said about the deceased and their life.
I guess it comes down to how the family wanted the service done.

[Banditbandit]

Yeah mate. It's all magic ... clearing the way for whatever happens next ...

Not my scene at all ...

[slofox]

For a start people are no longer burned at the stake.

Nah. These days they're burned in big ovens....actually, now I think about it, that's not that new either...

[george formby]

Interestin Maha. I'm fairly anti religion because I feel overall it still doe's more harm than good. Catholicism being a point in case.
On the other hand I attended a funeral a year or so back for a very well liked member of the community who died in a tragic accident. The service was held at the local run what you brung church & was very moving & respectful to the deceased, the main focus of the service rather than ritual. I left with a far greater understanding of the comfort which the church can give to people in life.
The day's real sadness was caused by strong, intractable cultural differences from one side of the deceased's family which made a mockery of the sincere farewell.
Each to their own & a demonstration that regardless of a persons beliefs this life is held in far greater esteem than the next despite what the church teaches.

Sorry to hear you have had such a sad morning.

[Blackshear]

Only been to a church twice.
Once when I was 7, for my cousins baptism, and the other time I was 10, picking up a cake for the neighbour.

Their practice scares me.

[EJK]

Church ain't so bad

[nodrog]

Is that the funerals where the pope looking guy packs an expensive looking Bong thing, lights it, and waves it around smoking everybody out?

Fanny

[george formby]

Is that the funerals where the pope looking guy packs an expensive looking Bong thing, lights it, and waves it around smoking everybody out?

Fanny

Bong on a rope type thing?

[Mom]

My mother was a high Anglican and spent a good deal of her life in and around the church and its rituals and rites. She gained an enormous amount of comfort and support from it. At her funeral the other week we honoured her by holding a classic prayer book funeral service for her, complete with bible readings and hymns. None of us that are left are Christians, but we gave her what she would have wanted. It was a beautiful service and very fitting for her. However, we also ignored her explicit instructions to have "no speechifying" so she got some :D I am a big believer in funerals being for the ones left behind to honour and celebrate the loss of a loved one from your lives. Moms service was all about her family and her.

Today I farewelled my stepfathers sister. She lives up here close to me so I have seen her quite a bit over the years. The last time I spoke with her was to tell her of my Moms passing so it was especially sad when she got suddenly sick and passed away this week.

I was very worried about attending her funeral as I am a bit fragile at the moment, but strangely I found it ok as it was all about tradition and not too much about emotions. I think your first experience of a Catholic Requiem Mass is always going to be a bit strange.

[Mom]

Is that the funerals where the pope looking guy packs an expensive looking Bong thing, lights it, and waves it around smoking everybody out?

Fanny

Yes, and splashes a bit of water about the place too.

[nodrog]

Bong on a rope type thing?

Thats the one.


Yes, and splashes a bit of water about the place too.

Yep I to have been to one of those funerals then, it was quite interesting alright.

Fanny

[Maha]

Heh. I had a similar experience a couple of years back. Felt like the funeral was more of an advert for the church than a celebration of the life of the deceased. My cousin got married a little while back and that was the same deal. Talked far more about Jesus than they did about the people getting married. Each to their own I suppose.

Is it too morbid to ask what your ideal service would be Maha?

Ideal service?
At a non relation service, to come away feeling I have just got to know the deceased a little better. That has happened.
Im sure they did the deceased proud today and that the funeral was just how she would have wanted it (which is what its all about) ..I was there for my wife, I did not know the deceased.

[Big Dave]

Next time wear only a condom and they won't want to know you.

[admenk]

Next time wear only a condom and they won't want to know you.

That certainly would make for an interesting funeral..A bit different to the traditional black tie I suppose.

[Edbear]

My mother was a high Anglican and spent a good deal of her life in and around the church and its rituals and rites. She gained an enormous amount of comfort and support from it. At her funeral the other week we honoured her by holding a classic prayer book funeral service for her, complete with bible readings and hymns. None of us that are left are Christians, but we gave her what she would have wanted. It was a beautiful service and very fitting for her. However, we also ignored her explicit instructions to have "no speechifying" so she got some :D I am a big believer in funerals being for the ones left behind to honour and celebrate the loss of a loved one from your lives. Moms service was all about her family and her.

Today I farewelled my stepfathers sister. She lives up here close to me so I have seen her quite a bit over the years. The last time I spoke with her was to tell her of my Moms passing so it was especially sad when she got suddenly sick and passed away this week.

I was very worried about attending her funeral as I am a bit fragile at the moment, but strangely I found it ok as it was all about tradition and not too much about emotions. I think your first experience of a Catholic Requiem Mass is always going to be a bit strange.

I agree, the deceased isn't going to be affected anymore but the grief of family and friends needs to be acknowledged and expressed. The funerals I've been to have generally been an occaision of reviewing the highlights of the life of the deceased and I've come away being reminded, educated and comforted.

I have attended one, though, where I couldn't for the life of me understand how the bereaved could have been comforted and I was angry with the minister's glib platitudes and, to be perfectly honest, the bollocks of what he said. Can't say anything though of course out of respect for the family so naturally kept my thoughts to myself.

[pzkpfw]

Used to have a catholic girlfriend.

Went to her church once, was the only time I saw her kneeling.

[Pussy]

but from where I stood/sat/stood/sat/stood/sat/stood (and that was just first half)

I KNOW what you mean! I have only been to one catholic funeral, and nearly got out of sync with the stand up/sit down phasing. Bit like an aerobic session, really.
I wonder, if Christ had been electrocuted instead of crucified, whether catholics would wear a little chair around their necks?

[Usarka]

Try going to a catholic wedding in ireland.

The reason the paddys' get pissed afterwards is because they've been lectured about how bad they've sinned and to relieve the pain in their knees.
:drinkup:

[Pussy]

Yep... most people look as though they had more fun at the last funeral they went to at a catholic wedding.....

[MadDuck]

Brings back a memory for me.

I happened to be in Ireland one Xmas some oh 15ish years ago. What do you do in Ireland at Xmas well you go to church before you head to the pub.... St Stephens Day. I loved my time there truely I did.

Went to this place in the middle of nowhere and ...wow....how formal was that. It has remained etched in my memory banks. I remember saying to my Irish friend just nudge me when its time to stand so I am not seen as being disrespectful. Hell they mostly laughed at me because of my accent.

First and last time I have ever been in a Catholic church.

[phill-k]

I don't go any more as they have become very cheap with the wine, only a tiny sip and its usually corked. At the end of the communion the bugger usually swills whats left as well.

[ynot slow]

After doing the school thing,and not going to church,the amazing thing is I remember what happens even now.
My uncles funeral was the full monty and had heaps of speakers,very un pc and humerous,the priest was a family relative,was my last funeral or visit to catholic church,but amongst the ceromony was very focused on my uncle and his life.

[Urano]

i'm catholic.
http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y198/sbblondie/Buddy_Christ2.jpg

it's simple: the goal is "love others more than yourself".
i'm a bad catholic.

after all i've been baptised only 5 years ago.
i wanted to think very well on that... :D

[Maha]

I don't go any more as they have become very cheap with the wine, only a tiny sip and its usually corked. At the end of the communion the bugger usually swills whats left as well.

Whats with the part where you turn to the person next to you or in front of you and offer your blessings?
I realise the church/religion has its formula, but thats like waving to someone on the road aint it?

[davereid]

Have to admit that the church has come forward a large bit.
For a start people are no longer burned at the stake.

That's true for the Christian Church.

But there are lots of religions that will still cheerfully cut a womans genitals / nose / ears / nipples off, and pelt her with stones on a Sunday afternoon.

Mind you. 20 minutes on the internet finds plenty of non religious people seeking exactly the same experience.

[Okey Dokey]

I was raised in an Irish catholic family, and will try to share my viewpoint on some stuff that has been touched on in this thread. When any of my relatives died, there was invariably an open casket viewing at set times, and a more informal wake, prior to the funeral. At these occasions, friends and relatives talked about the dead and shared stories etc.

The funeral mass is pretty standard form, and usually the priest of the parish, who knew the deceased and his family and community, would offer some personal but fairly formal words in the mass as a the eulogy. Family members could participate by perhaps doing one of the readings from the bible, or bearing the chalice etc to the altar at the appropriate time. I'm pretty sure believers found the whole thing familiar and comforting. The service had a type of dignity about it.

I have been uncomfortable at funerals where sobbing relatives gasp and cry trying to read or say a few words. So I guess it is a bit of what you are used to, or expect. The worst service I recall was one where the mike was passed around so that all and sundry could say a few words if they wished. There were some awful recollections aired, which could only have caused distress to the widow and family.

The handshake of peace, where we clasp the hands of those seated around us, happens at every service, and always seemed a nice expression of what the religious community was meant to be about.

Anyway, there are some thoughts for you. Old chestnut: What is the difference between an irish wedding & an irish funeral? One less drunk :)

[Headbanger]

Ive always found Catholic events insulting, Marriages and funerals that I have attended seem to be all about the church and an opportunity to lecture those attending.

Fuck em. Bastards know fuck all about the world, Wrapping themselves up in their delusions and judging everyone, Fuckers need a knuckle sandwich and a size 10 boot up the arse.

Went to a very close friends funeral a few years back, He was a fuckin pirate, Biker all his life, and the funeral wasn't about him or his life...oh wait, they had the part where they went on about sin.

I went outside and looked at the bikes, And I paid my respects to that man that he was, Not the fuckwit bullshit in the church.

[BAD DAD]

I think a lot of us have experienced that when first time in unfamiliar surroundings. My own include:

RSA - swilling down a pint when lights suddenly went dim, people stop drinking and rise, and then some Aussie voice starts up....

ACC demonstration rally - wandering arund in the sun bullshitting about bikes when someone from the Labour party gets up and starts chanting, everyone shuts up and faces the front then some people even clapped and cheered....

Court - some guy with a tatty wig, once again everyone had to stand then sit...

Rugby game - went to drink beer and see a bit of ball sport but found that proceedings began by chest beating display that regular rugby goers told me was a haka...

Council meeting....

Point is that we can all be suprised by rituals at events and wonder "what the hell was that" , and you don't even have to go to a religious ceremony to experiece it.

[Okey Dokey]

Headbanger reminded me of another point, which is SIN. I guess catholics are pretty used to the the theme that all humans are faulty and must try to live up to Jesus' example of how to live, etc, etc.

When the priest brings it up in the context of a funeral, we all reflect on our own personal shortcomings. I don't think the dead person is being singled out as a sinner. What a shame that people attending a funeral would feel that the deceased is being denigrated in this way. I hope anyone reading this will remember and not be hurt if they hear something about sin at a funeral. No wonder people get upset and angry; I never thought of it in this way.

Anyway, I hope that helps make things clearer.

[Maha]

I was raised in an Irish catholic family, and will try to share my viewpoint on some stuff that has been touched on in this thread. When any of my relatives died, there was invariably an open casket viewing at set times, and a more informal wake, prior to the funeral. At these occasions, friends and relatives talked about the dead and shared stories etc.

The funeral mass is pretty standard form, and usually the priest of the parish, who knew the deceased and his family and community, would offer some personal but fairly formal words in the mass as a the eulogy. Family members could participate by perhaps doing one of the readings from the bible, or bearing the chalice etc to the altar at the appropriate time. I'm pretty sure believers found the whole thing familiar and comforting. The service had a type of dignity about it.

I have been uncomfortable at funerals where sobbing relatives gasp and cry trying to read or say a few words. So I guess it is a bit of what you are used to, or expect. The worst service I recall was one where the mike was passed around so that all and sundry could say a few words if they wished. There were some awful recollections aired, which could only have caused distress to the widow and family.

The handshake of peace, where we clasp the hands of those seated around us, happens at every service, and always seemed a nice expression of what the religious community was meant to be about.

Anyway, there are some thoughts for you. Old chestnut: What is the difference between an irish wedding & an irish funeral? One less drunk :)

Thank you Okey,
'Family members could participate by perhaps doing one of the readings from the bible'
On this point, that happened, and when it did, I thought, anytime now I will get the connection between what the grandson was reading and the deceased. But no, that did not happen, he might as well have read a passage from 'Green Eggs and Ham' to be honest.

[Okey Dokey]

Yes, there are 2 readings in the mass. One old testament, one new testament. They are set, however, and the family can't pick and choose what reading they would like. In a regular mass, the priest uses his sermon to expound on the readings and relate them/interpret them for the congregation. Standby for the lecture about sin...

[Headbanger]

all humans are faulty and must try to live up to Jesus' example of how to live, etc, etc.


Fuck Jesus, and the holy goat he rode in on.

Fairy tales are entertainment not a code to live your life by.

Fair enough that back in the old days they just made shit up when they couldn't comprehend the world around them, But its had its day, Satan isn't waiting in the bowels of hell to eat your soul, You are not really drinking Christ blood you fuckin freaks, and the Church was way way way out of line suppressing the facts for the last 2000 years.

[Pixie]

's better than eating the deceased.

[Pixie]

Whats with the part where you turn to the person next to you or in front of you and offer your blessings?
I realise the church/religion has its formula, but thats like waving to someone on the road aint it?

Used to be that the Priest would bless you.
They outsource everything these days.

[Edbear]

Fuck Jesus, and the holy goat he rode in on.

Fairy tales are entertainment not a code to live your life by.

Fair enough that back in the old days they just made shit up when they couldn't comprehend the world around them, But its had its day, Satan isn't waiting in the bowels of hell to eat your soul, You are not really drinking Christ blood you fuckin freaks, and the Church was way way way out of line suppressing the facts for the last 2000 years.

Why don't you get it off your chest and tell us how you really feel.... :sunny:

[Maha]

I suppose the 'eating of my body and the drinking of my blood' thing is in relation to bread and wine?
Looking back on it, I think I reacted the same way when I first saw a Game of American Football.
Never watched a game again ever!

Did not understand it and had no need to.

[Okey Dokey]

oops, forgot to explain the transubstantiation stuff....

At the last supper, jesus said eat my body and drink my blood to his disciples ( take this all of you, and drink, this is the cup of my blood which has been given up for you and for all men so that sins may be forgiven). According to the catholic faith, the bread and wine is literally and really "transubstantiated" into the body and blood of jesus during the mass. It is not just symbolic to them, it is real.

Leftover wine and bread (also called the host) must be consumed. Priests and servers eat and drink whatever may be leftover: you can't just put it out for the birds.

[Big Dave]

Did not understand it and had no need to.

Sadly closed mind Maha. Here, I shall present you with some divine wisdom.

American football is a fascinating game and one of the simplest with the least penalties awarded per game.

The stop start nature of live broadcast is a drag (being conditioned to our non-stop codes), but in replay you get edited live action where it features the second most violent collisions (after ice hockey) in any ball sport. Magnificent athletes drawn from a massive gene pool operating at the highest levels.

They wear weapons on their heads and use them.

Every yard and every part of the game is statistically analysed. Also fascinating if you like sports statistics.

Some of the characters of the game are also outstanding thinkers - or entertainers.

I learnt a lot more from reading the gospel of coach Bill Parcells about human nature and man-management than any other.

I shall turn, face ESPN, and bow to the Lombardi for you. And the Green Bay Packers

[Maha]

I just have a very short attention limit is all, I dont get Aussie Rules either.
Thats where freedom of choice comes in handy Dave, I have chosen what suits me and what does not over the last 48 years and I am pretty happy with what my choice's have been so far. Suits me fine.

PS: Go The G B P'S......:blink:

[Big Dave]

I just have a very short attention limit is all, I dont get Aussie Rules either.
Thats where freedom of choice comes in handy Dave, I have chosen what suits me and what does not over the last 48 years and I am pretty happy with what my choice's have been so far. Suits me fine.


'When you don't know that you don't know, it's a lot different than when you do know that you don't know. '
Bill Parcells

'You are what you are.'
Bill Parcells


The de-fense rests. :-)

[Maha]

Bill should start been posting on my 'If you know what I mean' thread.

[Big Dave]

The Packers are such because the core of the original team came from workers at the local Abattoir.

Same as the South Sydney Rabbitohs are such because they were the Rabbit Hunters who used to shot out 'Rabbitoh' while pushing their barrows around the inner city streets - to advertise the availability of freshly killed bunny from La Perouse.