View Full Version : I'm in the dogbox good and proper. so this magical gearbox goop had better work
Ixion
6th June 2005, 19:49
Well, I finally managed to get hold of some magical Dow Corning gearbox goop. According to the US BMW forums, this goop actually makes the BMW krunchenklunkenklanken heap of cast iron crap behave in some way vaguely similar to a real gearbox. No idea if it works but they swear by it and I'll try anything that might give an improvement over 1920 Foden truck.
But it's landed me in the dogbox with Mrs Ixion. Good and proper. Drained the old gearbox and final drive oil out. OK. Get out my nice new bottle of Hypoy gear oil. Hm need to add 10% of magic goop. But the goop bottle is one of those which it's near impossible to pour from. And I need to be reasonably precise because with the final drive I'm only talking 26cc .I need something to put the goop in that I can pour from with some control.
Like a little jug! And there's dozens of little jugs in the kitchen cupboard. Mrs Ixion accumulates jugs and such like an open exhaust accumulates tickets.
Quick trip upstairs, and , ahha, just the job. Nice little blue one, perfect. And it won't do it any harm after all.
Dose the hypoy with goop, fill gearbox and final drive, and it's all good.
(Then wash the bike. I hate washing the bike).
Take the little jug back upstairs to wash and disaster strikes. Mrs Ixion spots me and engages instant third degree mode. And when she sees the residual goop - oh hell.
I don't know why women are so unreasonable about such things. It will wash off after all.
Anyway, I'm going to be going short for a while, so this goop had better be good.
Only observation so far is interesting. Before, with the bike on the centre stand, and the motor running in neutral (clutch engaged), the rear wheel would turn. Quite normal, nothing to worry about, just gear drag, seen it on many bikes.
But now it doesn't. (Turn that is) . Which is interesting.
I'll report on whether it makes any improvement.
(The old hypoy oil is recycled to lube Li'l Rat Bike's chain. Nothing is wasted)
WINJA
6th June 2005, 19:57
WOMAN ARE SO UNREASONABLE , LIKE WHEN WE ARE DRIVING AND I BEEP MY HORN AND SAY SHOW US YOUR FLANGE TO CHICKS AND SHE GETS ALL HUFFY AND SHIT, AND LIKE THE TIME I SAID HER FRIEND HAD THE BEST TITS IVE EVER SEEN AND SHE DOESNT TALK TO ME FOR 2 DAYS, LIKE THATS PUNISHMENT
Sensei
6th June 2005, 19:59
Yep the old measuring jug are excellent for those little jobs . :whistle:
sAsLEX
6th June 2005, 21:22
Yep the old measuring jug are excellent for those little jobs . :whistle:
had to mix some 2 stroke up for the weed eater and one of those little measuring jugs was perfect along with a big 60cc syringe she got from work to get the right amount of oil!
ps dont leave petrol in plastic measuring containers for to long, some of them melt!
Oh well, suppose they'll just buy another 5 at the next Tupperware party....errr do they still have those?
It's just that she doesn't trust you - after investigating a strange smell and she found your crankcases in the oven....you've been a marked man ever since.
I don't know why women are so unreasonable about such things. It will wash off after all.
Is she not a bike rider as well?
Ixion
6th June 2005, 22:20
..........
Ixion
6th June 2005, 22:21
It's just that she doesn't trust you - after investigating a strange smell and she found your crankcases in the oven....you've been a marked man ever since.I am, Iam. She only needs to see me wandering toward the kitchen in my overalls to go to action stations with an alacrity that would win the approval of even a Company Sarn't Major
Mrs Ixion takes the position that the gargre is my domain, into which she does not intrude, whilst the kitchen is hers. It is unfortunate that her kitchen contains some things that I need.
Much subtlety and subterfuge is required for such operations.
Ixion
6th June 2005, 22:24
Is she not a bike rider as well?
No indeed. Mrs Ixion is a genuine Luddite and regards motorcycles with the deep suspicion with which she regards everything originating since the Industrial Revolution.
She does admit that some of them are pretty, which is, to her mind, a saving grace.
StoneChucker
6th June 2005, 23:10
Oh well, suppose they'll just buy another 5 at the next Tupperware party....errr do they still have those?
I think "D-Vice" have parties, where you can try and buy. Not sure if it's tupperware though.
I have actually been to a tupperware party, once when I was a young'un. Didn't seem interesting then, nor does it now.
What about a KB Bike orientated tupperware party. All sorts of plastic-ware, suited to bikes, and bike maintanance. From mixing jugs to catch bottles for racing. Just to keep it manly like, we could drink beer and make sexist jokes? :rofl: ??? :niceone:
Brian d marge
7th June 2005, 02:05
I am, Iam. She only needs to see me wandering toward the kitchen in my overalls to go to action stations with an alacrity that would win the approval of even a Company Sarn't Major
Mrs Ixion takes the position that the gargre is my domain, into which she does not intrude, whilst the kitchen is hers. It is unfortunate that her kitchen contains some things that I need.
Much subtlety and subterfuge is required for such operations.
U to huh
Me ..my latest ploy was to wait untill her friends come round then wander into the kitchen ( shes to busy talking ) say I just need some boiling water ,,,,slip crank cases in oven .....when smell is noticed ( with range hood on ) the cases are just about ready.... slip on oven gloves... Wifes favorites ..appologise saying you didnt realise it would smell ( yeah right ) ,,,and dash back to the garage .....
It will come back to haunt you AFTER the friends have gone BUT the damage was done and she has had 20 min to calm down
I havent blown upp the race engine for nearly 6 months now and have a spare one ..SO ,,,I may get one more attempt out of the above ,,before she cottons on ..
:niceone::drinkup:
Stephen
scumdog
7th June 2005, 08:22
Hot tips: You can use the dishwasher (and I use to think it was a luxury) for fully degreasing hubs etc.but make sure 95%+ of old grease is out.
Put EP90 hypoid oil in the microwave for a short time to make it easier to pour.
A hair drier wil do instead of a heat-gun for use on shrink wrap for wiring (or to encourage the evaporation of water from said electrics)
Oven mitts are o.k. for handling hot exhaust pipes. :whistle:
But never, NEVER ever let you wife catching you using such tricks. :no:
C.B. is like Mrs Ixion, one step inside the back door with overalls on and it's like when a cat sees a dog (o.k., weak pun), the hackles go up and the voice drips with suspicion "what are you going to do? take that out of here and clean it in the gargre where it should be"
Imagine if she caught me actually doing any of the 'hot tips'?? :mad:
Flyingpony
7th June 2005, 09:00
Mrs Ixion takes the position that the gargre is my domain, into which she does not intrude, whilst the kitchen is hers.
Before anybody borrows their Mrs kitchen funnel to pour oil into said bike, I've discovered that on those 5l plastic petrol containers, the solid plastic pouring nozzles are really handy as an improvised motorcycle engine oil filler funnel! Fits perfectly into the hole so there's no need to hold it. Now with both hands free, it's down to the business of pouirng oil into the engine and not all over everything else.
Riff Raff
7th June 2005, 09:15
I wouldn't have a problem with a measuring jug being used for aforementioned purposes - but, from then on it would have to stay in the gargre and only be used out there and I would expect a nicenewbigger betterfaster jug to magically appear with a big box of chocolates and a K5 GSXR1000 to thank me for being so understanding . I don't want any sort of contaminents getting into my food - nevermind how well you clean it. Trouble is you men would then lose the damn thing, invade the kitchen, ruin another one, put it back so we don't know you've lost the first one etc.
Just cos you men think a few petroleum products are good for the system, doesn't mean that we women think so!
vifferman
7th June 2005, 09:19
No indeed. Mrs Ixion is a genuine Luddite and regards motorcycles with the deep suspicion with which she regards everything originating since the Industrial Revolution.
She does admit that some of them are pretty, which is, to her mind, a saving grace.
Well, it IS, as long as the ones she thinks are pretty actually are. As long as they're not girly pink scooters or summat...
I don't think the vifferbabe is too bad about stuff like this. Last thing I did which was 'marginal' was using the oven to bake the zorst paint on the collector off my VF500. Man, did that stink! Just turned the range hood on and opened the doors.
The thing I get into trouble for is fiddling. Now 'fiddling' basically means doing anything to the VifFerraRi that needn't oughtn't shouldn't mightn't need to be done. Which in these days of paying exorbitant sums to 'experts' to do stuff like change the cars' oils, could be almost anything. I've found out that cleaning/adjusting the chain is OK, oil/filter is "pay Kerry to do it", taking all the tupperware off to change the instrument bulbs invokes a bit of frowning and some minor interrogation, and most other things are OK if they don't involve power tools (the gargre is next to the lounge), and/or they take less than 10 minutes, which is about the time it takes the vifferbabe to notice I'm not comatose in front of the mind-bender. I think some of this goes back to me vandalising the VFR750's zorst in the DarkOfTheNight. Or maybe it was the time when I shimmed the VTR's needles and broke the TPS :Oops: when searching for MaximumWheeliePower. More likely it's that I haven't learned TrueSubterfuge: TheArtOfKeepingThingsSecretFromYourSpousalUnit. After more than a quarter century together, she can usually read me like a book, whereas since she's become a PodPersonAlienImpostor, I can't necessarily say the same about my ability to gauge what she's thinking...
MSTRS
7th June 2005, 09:57
Just cos you men think a few petroleum products are good for the system, doesn't mean that we women think so!
I Could understand that if it was fully synthetic oils, but *everyone* knows that minerals are good for your health
Ixion
7th June 2005, 12:14
Well, it IS, as long as the ones she thinks are pretty actually are. As long as they're not girly pink scooters or summat...
I don't think the vifferbabe is too bad about stuff like this. Last thing I did which was 'marginal' was using the oven to bake the zorst paint on the collector off my VF500. Man, did that stink! Just turned the range hood on and opened the doors.
The thing I get into trouble for is fiddling. Now 'fiddling' basically means doing anything to the VifFerraRi that needn't oughtn't shouldn't mightn't need to be done...
Ah well, she was once quite impressed with a "really pretty turquoise and pink" bike. No idea what, details such as make, model, how many cyclinders (What are cylinders ?) were deemed irrelevant. But it was really pretty.
The Whale is dismissed as boring (all white, how boring can you get). Li'l rat Bike doesn't make the cut either, black and red isn't pretty.
I have the reverse problem to you with fiddling. Mrs Ixion, being a total technophobe, makes no distinction between the ability to change a light bulb and advanced nuclear physics. If you can do one , you can do the other .
So whenever anything breaks or needs adjustment it is "Surely you can fix it? Why do we need to pay someone ?". Which is a touching tribute to my ability with duct tape and #8 wire but there are some things that even I am not game to take on .
Fortunately (or unfortunately, I'm not sure which) her Nissan Sunny is so simple that almost anything that needs doing is within my capability.
crashe
7th June 2005, 12:38
and did you not think to get an old beer can or something similar dog /cat food can and cut the top off it and use that to mix up the product in....lol
Oh yeah wash them out first... nope not in the kitchen but outside with the garden hose.
Oh thats right men dont think...hehehehe.
You must learn to ask next time... and she will give you something to use...
I would have thought after the last time that you would have learnt a very valuable lesson... Never go and use anything in your partner's/wife's kitchen with out asking first.
Onceuponatime a nice nurse said to a Mr Biff, "Can you hear me?” To which Biff replied, "No". She asked the question again then realised Biff could indeed hear her, despite the fact that he had a rather large open wound to the back of my head.
Just out of hear shot a now recovering Biff noticed a gentleman of the law hovering outside of the hospital cubicle. "He's here to see you", replied the nice nurse. "Why?", Biff asked." I think he wants to ask you that question", replied the nurse.
Enter Mr Policeperson,"What appened ere then sunny".
"Je ne avent a freakin clue", respondez moi,"je avec grand concussion sur le bonce moi peit poulex".
I did indeed have a rather nasty headache thanks to the afore mentioned injury.
Apparentelemont Biff had borrowed one of his ex-girlfriends (French) 'rags' to clear le gunk from chez rocker cover of an old motor. The said 'rag' being under the sink in an annex to my house. It turns out that it wasn’t a rag, but a 'designer' label vest top type thing, mistakenly placed there. The volatile Madam Biff took exception to this and clonked him, from behind with une grand implemont tout suite. Bloody hurt too. Apparently the neighbour heard her scream and saw her run out of the house, at which point they thought they'd call monsieur plod who arrived dans le scene to find moi lying in a pool of chiraz.
Madam Biff was lucky to get away with assault, and to have such an understanding ex Biffriend who kindly packed her bags for her and left them pour her collectamont on the bloody rue.
vifferman
7th June 2005, 13:32
Ah well, she was once quite impressed with a "really pretty turquoise and pink" bike. No idea what, details such as make, model, how many cyclinders (What are cylinders ?) were deemed irrelevant. But it was really pretty.
That'd probably be one of them Honda 250's (VTX250 or summat...)
The Whale is dismissed as boring (all white, how boring can you get). Li'l rat Bike doesn't make the cut either, black and red isn't pretty.
Ha ha ... she sounds like she's related to the vifferbabe. She vetoed my third to last bike purchase because it was too boring (silver VFR800), but OKed the purchase of the VTR because it wasn't. The VifFerraRi was so pretty that she encouraged me to buy it, when I was wanting to "go away and think about it." (Had I done so, I would no doubt have saved myself $1000...)
Her car was bought without her even driving it, because of the colour.
Fair enough, I guess, as I was driving it and suitably impressed with that side of things.
zadok
7th June 2005, 13:46
Hot tips: You can use the dishwasher (and I use to think it was a luxury) for fully degreasing hubs etc.but make sure 95%+ of old grease is out.
Put EP90 hypoid oil in the microwave for a short time to make it easier to pour.
A hair drier wil do instead of a heat-gun for use on shrink wrap for wiring (or to encourage the evaporation of water from said electrics)
Oven mitts are o.k. for handling hot exhaust pipes.:whistle:
'scumdog' that is brilliant. :niceone: :motu:
I need something to put the goop in that I can pour from with some control.
Like a little jug! And there's dozens of little jugs in the kitchen cupboard. Mrs Ixion accumulates jugs and such like an open exhaust accumulates tickets.
Quick trip upstairs, and , ahha, just the job. Nice little blue one, perfect. And it won't do it any harm after all.
Dose the hypoy with goop, fill gearbox and final drive, and it's all good.
(Then wash the bike. I hate washing the bike).
Take the little jug back upstairs to wash and disaster strikes. Mrs Ixion spots me and engages instant third degree mode. And when she sees the residual goop - oh hell.
I don't know why women are so unreasonable about such things. It will wash off after all.
Anyway, I'm going to be going short for a while, so this goop had better be good.
You total bloody amateur!
When I was growing up dad used to bring large chunks of engine inside to work on - on the dining room table, no less. If mum was really fast moving, there'd actually be newspaper under the engine block.
I mean, where else do you do valve grinds? Dining room table is great 'cause we could at least see the TV and take our minds off the work (even casual visitors ran the risk of putting in time "behind the paste" at our house, actually living there or being born into the family was taken as "volunteering").
One day dad stripped and reassembled the lawn mower on the lino in the kitchen - then pulled the cord to see if it worked...
...I really can't believe this was the same man who explained to me in great detail how the blades on a lawn mower are aerodynamically shaped like a propeller so that they create suction to lift the grass blades up into the path of the spinning blades.
Works well on lino, too. :weird:
As to domestic containers, funnels etc being used - it was a good day if it was just oil (detergent at least breaks that shit down) and not two-pot epoxy resin that sets and proves harder than the vessel it's set in.
If Mrs Ixion had grown up in our house, she'd have a mite more perspective on the matter - and know fourteen common household chemicals that can remove oil from plastic...
Interested to know what this magic goop is... and if it works i'll be getting some too ! And thanks for the warning but i got my own set of pouring and squeezing in and wiping things, and from memory might pay to check if there is any of the stuff in the magic goop that attacks (phosphous bronze) in the g box , i have heard that some synthetic oils have this additive in and is no good for bmws guzzis etc that have this sort of bronze inna g box.... yours in non krunchness, smooth sweet changes, and 100,000kms grief free..... :ride: :yes:
Ixion
7th June 2005, 15:17
Interested to know what this magic goop is... and if it works i'll be getting some too ! And thanks for the warning but i got my own set of pouring and squeezing in and wiping things, and from memory might pay to check if there is any of the stuff in the magic goop that attacks (phosphous bronze) in the g box , i have heard that some synthetic oils have this additive in and is no good for bmws guzzis etc that have this sort of bronze inna g box.... yours in non krunchness, smooth sweet changes, and 100,000kms grief free..... :ride: :yes:
Dow Corning MolyKote. But a very special grade that Dow are hellish unwilling to admit exists.
US BMW forums reckon it's good. Not a synthetic, doesn't do nasty things to bronze. Some of the US guys have been running on it for 100000+ miles (not km) now.
I think it's basically just good old MolySlip.
I'll advise if it makes any difference. Only done about 20km on it so far. Seems better , but I may be imagining it. OTOH, received wisdom is it takes a few hundred k before the benefits show.
So I'll wait and see.
Ixion is grasping at straws....and he knows it,a typical deluded BMW owner looking for the Holy Grail that holds the magic elixer of smooth gearchanges,a never ending quest deserving of a Monty Python scit.
You are worried about sulphur,only found in GL5 EP oils.
Ixion
7th June 2005, 15:25
Ixion is grasping at straws....and he knows it,a typical deluded BMW owner looking for the Holy Grail that holds the magic elixer of smooth gearchanges,a never ending quest deserving of a Monty Python scit.
You are worried about sulphur,only found in GL5 EP oils.
I know, I know. Hence my comment that I'm probably imagining things.
But a drowning man will clutch at straws.
Hm, there's a thought. In the old days unscrupulous persons used to stuff noisy diffs with banana leaves.
I wonder if stuffing the BMW klunkenbox with straw would help? Could hardly be worse, surely
My XLV750 was a throw back,I felt like I was riding my old /5 again,but then it was made to compete with the first GS...something to do with shaftdrive and heavy flywheels I suppose.At least with a seperate gearbox you are at liberty to try everything in the book without any effect on the motor.I have a synthetic GL5 that works wonders in car gearboxes....sometimes people say ''what did you do to my gearbox?'' Wanna try some of that next? I got a 60 litre drum about 3 yrs ago,cost a fortune and now manuals are a dying breed.
White trash
8th June 2005, 08:10
I wouldn't have a problem with a measuring jug being used for aforementioned purposes - ........... Trouble is you men would then lose the damn thing, invade the kitchen, ruin another one, put it back so we don't know you've lost the first one etc.
Ah, babe? We gotta talk........
Riff Raff
8th June 2005, 09:01
Ah, babe? We gotta talk........
Really? I've just given you some advance warning which I think is very nice of me. Nevertheless I will be very reasonable when my nice shiny K5 GSXR1000 turns up after your first misdemeanour!
Paul in NZ
8th June 2005, 09:38
Dow Corning MolyKote. But a very special grade that Dow are hellish unwilling to admit exists.
Hmm... Guzzi specify a molybendium (sp) additive to the rear drive box. It's getting impossible to find now (I have some Molykote but I'm sure this version is a copper based engine assembly lube) so I have been using a bottle of Motul diff / gear box oil with moly in it. It's a bit pricey but seems to do the business.
I'm nearly out of it and will need some more soon. Anyone know where I can get some in wellie?
Cheers
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