Free Beer, Hot Women, & the AMCC 2 Hour Race [Archive]

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Pumba

11th October 2010, 18:32

Right now I have your attention,

My 2 Hour partner for the last two years has decied he is not up to the task (for the record Scott McCann = Soft, Pussy, Slow, Nothing, please feel free to rip on him more, I will be sending him the link for this thread) so this leaves a vacant position. My people are currently in negotiation with Rossi's people however with all his current injuries I am not convinced he his up to the task.

So in preperation for him not passing the required fitness tests I open this unique opurtunity to the motorcycling comunity of New Zealand.

So please post you expresion of intreset in this thread or send me a PM if you think you are up to the task of partnering with me. I am happy to use my bike, or we can wreck yours if you prefer that.

By the way this thread in no way legally obliges me to provide free beer, or hot women to anyone. However if your chances of being the successful applicant will be highly increased if you can provide these to me.

Dutchee

11th October 2010, 18:57

Henk told me I'm not eligible to respond to your request - I can supply beer, though. Hot women? Nope. Capable rider? Nope. Bike? hmmm, my theory on a chick colour doesn't seem to turn guys off riding the bitch.
Guess who has to cook dinner tomorrow - it ain't me.
(let's pretend I've never said I don't want to ride the 2hr as all the fast guys lapping me continuously would mean I had no fun).

Henk

11th October 2010, 18:58

I was thinking of sending you a copy of my CV. However if you aren't supplying women and beer I'm not interested.

You going to offer Soft McCann a role as brolly dolly? Christ anyone would think he was broken with a newborn or something.

Arronduke

11th October 2010, 19:20

Dutchee

11th October 2010, 19:31

lol, sounds like ideal - me as "partner", Graham as "mechanic" - he's screwed, and last place (of the finishers) would be the aim of the day hehehe

Sorry Pumba, as you were, partner still required (hmm, the wine is hitting the spot and MotoGP is good, but ...)

grantnz

11th October 2010, 19:53

I'm in. Please find enclosed CV. Your bike, not mine.

grantman

11th October 2010, 19:59

Sorry Pumba
But Graham has already agreed to partner me in the 2 hour
(He could still be your mechanic though)

Not sure you could handle his skills
I am his twin and still can’t believe his expertise in some area's

Check out what he was up to yesterday!
Below is a copy of the email from Graham's wife Sharyn sent to my wife.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Guess what my husband was doing yesterday? I thought you might appreciate this:
He recently purchased a leaf blower (because of all the tea tree leaves on the driveway).
He decided to use it INSIDE the house.
So the house stunk of petrol.
And all the leaves ended up around the edges of the rooms - which he said he would brush up. No prizes for guessing - he DIDN'T.
In the bathroom, the leaves were all blown up onto the nicely clean basins, vanities, bath...
In the conservatory, all the tiny leaves and dust, etc, was blown up on to the CLEAN washing.
And he has gone to work today and left it all to....ME...to CLEAN UP!!!
Boys and their toys huh?
Hope you're having a better day than I'm having - CLEANING!!!

Sharyn

Henk

11th October 2010, 20:26

I'm in. Please find enclosed CV. Your bike, not mine.

Pumba you don't want this guy as a partner
1. He's bloody fast when he can keep the rubber side down
2. He'll blow your brake and clutch lever budget for 18 months in the two hours and possibly your gearbox budget as well.
3. He smells bad

Grantman
Doesn't look like we'll be able to revoke Grahams man card any time soon even if he is a bit suspect as a mechanic.

woodyracer

11th October 2010, 21:02

I knw how guttered you must be to hear this but...ive sorted my 2 hour, after last years devistation half way through the race ill be back....:yes:

Let it be a lesson learnt, you cant win the race in 1 hour......:facepalm:

Bucking bobu

12th October 2010, 07:54

Even though I've missed a few races I've heard the stories and seen some of the results. Doesn't Carl lie down on the track (and not with hot women) more than he is upright? And any mechanic would be a god send especially when pieces of his bike tend to fall off more often than they stay on. Really how hard is it to use duct tape and cable ties?

So the soft pussy slow nothing may have just decided to team up with Lorenzo instead :-)

Of course this has been posted with lots of love from your cousin and the soft pussy's wife. Lesson Learned, dont put the link on my facebook page especially when my wonderful daughter has gone back to bed and I have 2 hours to kill before having to be at work.

So team up with Carl if you dare.........

NinjaNanna

12th October 2010, 10:55

When is this race? What are the pre-requistes. Plus I'll probably need it in writing that there definately will not be hot women supplied, if I'm to get clearance.

F5 Dave

12th October 2010, 13:17

I know a good mechanic that would be worth considering.

very talented...

Grahams CV..

Added two stroke petrol to his tank.
Left the axle nut loose so his rear wheel fall collapsed.
Left choke on and wondered why it would not run...
Spark plug loose.. again wondered why it would not run.

I am sure there would be NO charge to use Graham as your head mechanic for the 2hr...!

Upper cylinder lubricant + makes a 4 stroke smell ok
Quick change rear wheel
Easy starting for that from cold push start
Special low adjustable compression head for Auckland fuel.

Seriously this race is good fun. I've done about 6 of them & had a blast, just too far these days with fandamly commitments.

Hot women? well there will be Hot Women, Hot men, hot bikes & hot everything if the sun is out & you're sweating in leathers on a stinker of a day for a couple of hours. Having said that the last one I did I had to swim for it in torrential downpour.

Ahh, Auckland, bunch of 'toppers', - always want to have more weather, more often than the rest of the country.

Henk

12th October 2010, 14:11

[QUOTE=F5 Dave;1129881831]the last one I did I had to swim for it in torrential downpour. QUOTE]

It never rains at Mt Wellington

F5 Dave

12th October 2010, 14:36

Maybe I'll take the fligh<nobr style="color: darkblue; font-family: Verdana,arial,Helvetica,sans-serif; font-weight: bold;" id="itxt_nobr_10_0"></nobr> (http://www.lyriczz.com/lyrics/tony%21-toni%21-tone%21/27558-it-never-rains-in-southern-california/)t out tonight
and you can pick me up 'bout eight
I don't know what airline girl
but I know it won't be late
'cause they tell me...

It never rains in southern (& slightly east) Auckland

they tell me...

It never rains in southern Mt Wgtn

rachprice

12th October 2010, 14:40

I think Im gonna be in Valencia!

Otherwise I would love to, not that Im fast, but one of my babe med student friends is recently single and Id bring beer if you paid haha

grantnz

12th October 2010, 15:06

[QUOTE=Henk;1129881433]Pumba you don't want this guy as a partner
1. He's bloody fast when he can keep the rubber side down
2. He'll blow your brake and clutch lever budget for 18 months in the two hours and possibly your gearbox budget as well.
3. He smells bad

I smell bad?? WTF? I thought it was you, but being the polite person I am, I didn't say anything.
Anyway, got home and found my right leg is starting to decompose. Doctor thinks it is something I have come into contact with, either an Aucklander or the tarmac.

Henk

12th October 2010, 15:34

my right leg is starting to decompose. Doctor thinks it is something I have come into contact with, either an Aucklander or the tarmac.

Must have been me then, Sorry about the leg, my doctor told me I wouldn't be contagious after three hours south of the Bombays, he must have been lying, untrustworthy Jafa that he is.

ac3_snow

12th October 2010, 18:30

Arronduke

12th October 2010, 18:38

That dude from INXS died trying that stuff for fun.....:gob:

Henk

12th October 2010, 18:58

so Im guessing that there is in fact teams for the two hours then and we swap riders around, bit like the buckhurst1000 a.
So can you do it solo then? lol my bike is pretty comfy :no: but 2hours is a pretty dammm long time

Yep it's a team event.
Two riders and a lap scorer.
Le Mans start, each rider must do at least 55 minutes. Other than that you can change riders as often as you like. The fast guys seem to do one change at about an hour. We did 6 20 minute stints. Others half an hour at a time. Huge fun.

fi5hy

12th October 2010, 19:02

what are the dates??

Henk

12th October 2010, 19:05

13th November pratice and the 4th round of the NI thing.
14th Two hour.
Some of you southerners planing on coming up?

Pumba

12th October 2010, 19:09

I was thinking of sending you a copy of my CV. However if you aren't supplying women and beer I'm not interested.

Its a hard road finding the purfect team manager.

I'm in. Please find enclosed CV. Your bike, not mine.

Well you are certinly qualified for the position, and your CV is very impresive. I will get my people to talk to your people. Actually I am sure my bike has already taken some big hits on that scale just no one has got it on camera.

I know a good mechanic that would be worth considering.

I am pretty good at not doing shit up myself. Actually I think the bike is still missing an engine bolt.

So team up with Carl if you dare.........

Hmmm, that didnt quite go as I planned:facepalm:

When is this race? What are the pre-requistes. Plus I'll probably need it in writing that there definately will not be hot women supplied, if I'm to get clearance.

14 November. When you getting back from the West Island. Actually I dont think you or I could sign enough disclaimers to give she that must be obayed piece of mind:shutup:

I think Im gonna be in Valencia!

Otherwise I would love to, not that Im fast, but one of my babe med student friends is recently single and Id bring beer if you paid haha

Babe med students, you have my attention

So can you do it solo then?

The 2 hour is a team event so no superman efforts. JC's rules.

fi5hy

12th October 2010, 19:13

just looking at flights. I don't think Pumba wants me thrashing his bike tho:innocent:

Arronduke

12th October 2010, 19:16

Lap scorer... does everyone need to find there own?
That will be harder than finding a rider...!

NinjaNanna

12th October 2010, 19:21

14 November. When you getting back from the West Island. Actually I dont think you or I could sign enough disclaimers to give she that must be obayed piece of mind:shutup:

Damn not till the end of November

Dutchee

12th October 2010, 19:32

Everyone has to have a lap scorer and preferably a flaggie as well (so teams should be FOUR people).
It is impossible to lap score for more than one team, as all you do is watch your team, write down the time they go past (each lap), note when they go into pits and when they crash (just asterixes etc), from dodgy memory, also when the rider changes. This means that you're watching the bike, stopwatch (also to be supplied by you, not the club), and writing down. With laps around the 30-40 seconds, it's pretty full on.

I have to admit, it's also a lot of fun - you manage to watch a few seconds a lap of other racing, so it's all good. I wasn't impressed last year when I was told I was going to be lapscoring, as thought watching paint dry might have been more fun, but it was fun. You're sitting amongst a flock of people each watching different bikes, so hear the ooooh, aaaaah, yay, go ...... etc, which makes it more interesting hehehe

What is supplied is a piece of paper with lots of numbers on it for lap times to be filled in (does that make sense?), so bring pen, pencil (just in case pen dies), stopwatch, food, drink, empty bladder. I think clipboards were supplied.

If your rider is unlucky enough to crash out early (unable to put bike on track), then you have a short day. If they get the bike going again, you sit and time again.

The one thing I didn't realise last year (as I didn't bother attending the riders' briefing), was if you crash and the bars touch the ground you have to go in for re-scrutineering. If you get away with them not touching the ground (stuck on other bike or person or whatever), then you don't. I thought Henk had gone back in after his crash because he'd broken something, but noooooooo, he was back out again after a minute or so.

Now that we've totally hijacked Pumba's thread, can we find him someone to ride with?

Pumba

12th October 2010, 19:43

just looking at flights. I don't think Pumba wants me thrashing his bike tho:innocent:

Personally the 1 race meeting I was at with you Fish, you crashed a shit load less than the 1 meeting I have been to with Grant, read into that what you will.

Buddha#81

12th October 2010, 19:54

Fly me up.....at least the bike will be correctly set up for my weight!:facepalm:

NinjaNanna

12th October 2010, 20:14

Fly me up.....at least the bike will be correctly set up for my weight!:facepalm:

lol lol lol lol

Arronduke

12th October 2010, 20:50

Dutchee... good info.
Thanks

Henk

12th October 2010, 20:59

Arron you going to have your FXR ready for this? :innocent:

Arronduke

13th October 2010, 19:34

grantman

13th October 2010, 21:16

ahh NO.

Henk read your post last night and went to be thinking about putting inmy spare motor and just getting the thing ridable and doing the two hour.

Then I thought... no ... if I throw it down the road I will never finish it to how i want. And I know I will bin it after that but thats fine.

Then all I need to do try and keep it tidy.

Translation
Its too pretty to race
I am scared the cheap piston is used will seize the engine
I dont want to look like a nanna when Grant,Henk & Pumba pass me
:violin: