Unglish - ya doon it rong.

[PrincessBandit]

Just for Hitcher - found this on the internet this morning whilst browsing through what I thought was a set of medical related links...


Are We There Yet? Ann Aitken Worth
“English - you’re doing it wrong”

'Despite what the somewhat slapdash presentation of this blog may suggest, I am a writer. Words are my stock in trade and punctuation, sadly enough, is a source of both joy and pain in my life, and today I’d like to talk about it. I know I overuse commas and it’s a dreadful habit I have tried to free myself from without success. My comma dependency runs too strong for that. I hope it doesn’t disturb your blog-reading experience.
My obsession with words and the stuff in between them could be viewed as slightly tragic. I realised I was doomed halfway through my three-year journalism degree. I arrived at my weekend job bright and early at 6.30am and realised I’d spent much of the 30-minute walk there ruminating on the fine points of apostrophes.
It wouldn’t be the last time. A brisk run around the city gives me plenty of time to observe blatant apostrophe misuse on signs everywhere. It’s almost obsessive compulsive– I find it difficult to resist the urge to march into shops to inform them the sign is wrong. An apostrophe crusader in running shorts and sneakers. I like that image. I can’t be the only one this drives nuts, surely?
I even put apostrophes in my text messages. I also refuse to bastardise the English language by using text-speak, and pedantically spell out things correctly in text messages. Or at least I try – spelling isn’t my strong suit.
I don’t mind new slang – it’s creative and interesting, as an evolving language should be. But some recent words make me near incandescent with fury because they’re just unnecessary, usually longer and more jargon-like than the original word.
(Yes, I’m aware it takes a special kind of person to be moved to fury by words. What can I say? I’m a passionate person. I can be as apathetic as the next Gen Y person, but I prefer to throw myself body and soul into things.)
Take the word signage for example. Preferably, take it away from the English language altogether. Why the "age"? Why not the word signs instead? And linkages. How is that better than the word links? Is it something different? I just find it frustrating.
Then there are perfectly valid words I dislike anyway. This list included the word infrastructure. It just screams "boring" to me.
A guy I work with hates the word moist. He finds it unsavoury. I’ve never had a problem with it but I can see his point.
This is the sort of thing we discuss in the newsroom, but I’d like to know if grammar and word obsession extends further.
Does incorrect grammar annoy you? Do you even notice? Do you have words you like, or dislike? And are we all doomed by the younger generation’s slim grasp on written coherence?'

I feel more normal having read this article. I must admit my obsession for spelling mistakes and incorrect comma use (not to mention improper contraction or the reverse - such as "I should of" squirm) annoys the daylights out of me at times.
Anyway, immediately after thinking of myself as I read it, I thought of Hitcher.

I wonder why that might have been.

[PrincessBandit]

Oh, and a word that I find makes my skin crawl is "nape". I don't know why. It's a perfectly normal word, it doesn't have any hideously funny ring to it (like "scrotum" - see, I'm laughing out loud, 'lolling' if you like, as I type it!). Scrotum that is, not nape ewwwww.

Why do we find some words simply hilarious or revolting, despite their harmless or dreary meaning?

[Ronin]

Assumably. Contrary to what most people would think, this is in fact a word. This caused some discord when I corrected my partner on its usage.

[yod]

I'm genuinely astounded at how many people think the opposite to win is loose.

:facepalm:

[terbang]

Anyways. Hearing some poor German or Italian, who learnt their English in Amerika using it just kills me.

[Swoop]

I'm genuinely astounded at how many people think the opposite to win is loose.:facepalm:
Especially on KB.:facepalm:

[maggot]

Funnily enough I wrote a column piece along these lines for an English class once.
I think I concluded that the best cure for the chronic mis-user would be forcing them to learn one of the romance languages. Nothing better teaches you your own language than learning another I'd say! :yes:

[terbang]

We're all living in America, America its wunderbar...

[Usarka]

Nothing wrong with a good moisty.

[Hitcher]

Gahh! Thud.

[wysper]

The apostrophe thing gets me, because I have never successfully learned the rules.

So I tend to leave them out rather than use them. Contractions are fine, but when they are used in the possessive sense (I hope that is right), then I am all out at sea.


I try not to infuriate Hitcher, but I am sure some of my posts do.

[EJK]

The thread title is very Asian. That's all I can say.

[steve_t]

Assumably. Contrary to what most people would think, this is in fact a word. This caused some discord when I corrected my partner on its usage.

Assumably is fine. It's "supposebly" that annoys me. That and "irregardless"!! :facepalm: As well as the "should of" and "could of". I'm a grammar nazi around people I know :innocent:

[Usarka]

Gahh! Thud.

I can't find Gahh in my dictionary :scratch:

[Ronin]

I loath the word texted and prefer "so and so sent me a text". I will even stoop to saying I text so and so. Texted just sounds wronger than a wrong thing wearing a wrong hat on wrong day.

[skinman]

one that annoys me is people saying "lend" when they mean "borrow":shutup:

[Winston001]

My pet hate is "physicality". It didn't exist as a word but now its (no apostrophe) everywhere. :blink:

But.......language is a living creature and I just have to suck it up.

Good thread. :yes:

[Maha]

Even if those who use the line..''I haven't done nuffink'' could infact speak english properly, not proply, they would realise that what they just means, they have infact done somefink.:yes:
They correct thing to say would be...''I have done nothing''.

[slofox]

Anyone having trouble with the apostrophe, come and see me after school...I get Mr Tombolino to teach you - he likea to breaka da leg...

[MSTRS]

Motocyclist's are reely fond of using there breaks to.

[HenryDorsetCase]

We're all living in America, America its wunderbar...

Coca Cola, sometimes war....

[HenryDorsetCase]

http://i.imgur.com/HL1ZR.jpg

[HenryDorsetCase]

/thread

sorted.

[Hitcher]

Last post is the primary rationale behind the BDOTGNZA but otherwise OK for an American rant...

[Hitcher]

The apostrophe thing gets me, because I have never successfully learned the rules.

So I tend to leave them out rather than use them. Contractions are fine, but when they are used in the possessive sense (I hope that is right), then I am all out at sea.


I try not to infuriate Hitcher, but I am sure some of my posts do.

As long as you realise there is no apostrophe in photos or eggs, you'll have done extremely well compared to many. I don't know how people ever get the idea that apostrophes are about plurals.

[steve_t]

Oh, I also notice that people don't seem to know the difference between "to" and "too" these days. Probably, the latest pet peeve.... is that.... for some reason.... people have decided.... that they should put .... a whole lot of "...." between words/sentences.
And "brought" vs "bought".

[Hitcher]

Oh, I also notice that people don't seem to know the difference between "to" and "too" these days. Probably, the latest pet peeve.... is that.... for some reason.... people have decided.... that they should put .... a whole lot of "...." between words/sentences.

Don't get me fucking started on ellipses. They'll be the fucking death of me. Online social media has much to answer for.

Firstly, ellipses have only three dots. People add lots of dots because they have no idea what they're doing and they think that this somehow looks cool.

Secondly they're generally used where a fullstop or a colon or even a comma would suffice.

Thirdly they're part of a phenomenum about ending sentences with multiple punctuation marks. More than one exclamation mark doesn't make the exclamation any more exclamatory. More than one question mark doesn't make the question any harder or more obscure.

As for wankers who put spaces between the last letter of the word in a sentence and the following punctuation mark: may they simmer for eternity over a steady heat.

I have a theory about predicting the names of the children of punctuation abusers and the colour of the curtains in their front windows...

[steve_t]

Don't get me fucking started on ellipses. They'll be the fucking death of me. Online social media has much to answer for.

Firstly, ellipses have only three dots. People add lots of dots because they have no idea what they're doing and they think that this somehow looks cool.

Secondly they're generally used where a fullstop or a colon or even a comma would suffice.

Thirdly they're part of a phenomenum about ending sentences with multiple punctuation marks. More than one exclamation mark doesn't make the exclamation any more exclamatory. More than one question mark doesn't make the question any harder or more obscure.

As for wankers who put spaces between the last letter of the word in a sentence and the following punctuation mark: may they simmer for eternity over a steady heat.

I have a theory about predicting the names of the children of punctuation abusers and the colour of the curtains in their front windows...

Did you just write "phenomenum"? :innocent:

[gijoe1313]

I's is off da clock ..., scr3w this shizzl3 fer a laff. Its' betta then doin' my ABCs' : like ,peace out ya'll!!!!!!!!!... so I don' do nuffink's wrong ,so I didnt' loose the plot their!!!!! lolz!!!!! U c dat? so dun get your's knickers' inna twi3t ,its' all k3wl mon!! PEACE OUT!!!!

[imdying]

Oh, I also notice that people don't seem to know the difference between "to" and "too" these days. Probably, the latest pet peeve.... is that.... for some reason.... people have decided.... that they should put .... a whole lot of "...." between words/sentences.
And "brought" vs "bought".Heheheh, don't tell Hitcher... but I do it because he at once stage expressed his revulsion of them... :D

[terbang]

Choke splutter, I just stumbled over from another thread, still laughing my head off where the term 'beef curtains' was used. :gob:

[Ronin]

Did you just write "phenomenum"? :innocent:

One would suggest Sir that Hamilton is not far enough away for safety.

[Ronin]

Choke splutter, I just stumbled over from another thread, still laughing my head off where the term 'beef curtains' was used. :gob:

You have to admit, it was grammatically correct.

[slofox]

Did you just write "phenomenum"? :innocent:

Yes, he did indeed. Standards are slipping all over these days. :facepalm:

[PrincessBandit]

Choke splutter, I just stumbled over from another thread, still laughing my head off where the term 'beef curtains' was used. :gob:

Lol. I was just in the Hug-a-Pussy thread, and this reminded me of a girlfriend who used to call them "flaps".

I'm sure Pussy knows what they are too :facepalm:

[MSTRS]

As long as you realise there is no apostrophe in photos or eggs, you'll have done extremely well compared to many. I don't know how people ever get the idea that apostrophes are about plurals.

Um - Hitcher - I dropped it, and now my egg's broken. I took photos, but only one photo's any good...

[Hitcher]

Um - Hitcher - I dropped it, and now my egg's broken. I took photos, but only one photo's any good...

Good lad. Proper usage will get you everywhere with the BDOTGNZA.

And for those who appear to think that phenomena is a song by the Muppets, they should pause and consider Latin singulars and plurals (which, with a few exceptions - like fora - I generally detest).

[steve_t]

Good lad. Proper usage will get you everywhere with the BDOTGNZA.

And for those who appear to think that phenomena is a song by the Muppets, they should pause and consider Latin singulars and plurals (which, with a few exceptions - like fora - I generally detest).

Is that phenomena comment directed at me? :shutup: Phenomenon (singular) and Phenomena (plural) seem to be also be an exception to the -um (singular), -a (plural) rules of Latin :drinkup::innocent:

[Big Dave]

I still don't care.

[scumdog]

I still don't care.

Garn...only cos ya can't do no better..

[Big Dave]

Not caring is easier than going back and seeing the clangers I've dropped and :facepalm:

[MSTRS]

Are you a product of TheModernSchoolOfJournalism TM ?
I'm convinced that anyone who has a decent grasp of proper England is doomed to fail their finals...

[Usarka]

If I hear one more ad for a product that costs a hundred and twenty dollars I'm going to buy a curry from the E rated shit hole curry house down the road, leave it on the bench for a week before eating it, burst a huge shotgun shit splat into a bubble-wrap courier pack and mail it to the sparrow fisting rectum stretcher that wrote the damn thing.


this reminded me of a girlfriend who used to call them "flaps".


Piss flaps.

[scumdog]

Lol. I was reminded me of a girlfriend who used to call them "flaps".

Yup, "piss flap like John Waynes saddle-bags":blink:

[Daffyd]

As long as you realise there is no apostrophe in photos or eggs, you'll have done extremely well compared to many. I don't know how people ever get the idea that apostrophes are about plurals.

You could probably get away with "photo's" because it's an abbreviation of "photographs".

[ellipsis]

....thats my dots your'e talking of....now that I know they piss people off....I shall use them even more....nor will I use them in groups of three....now that I know that is illegal also..I find them to be cool little things....like dots , almost....what I really hate is cunts using my tools and not putting them back in their particular spots......correct face out..hanging there, waiting....I swear and rant and rave and not one dot issues forth from my tightly clenched teeth....now I know why........I've been saving them all these years....just to unleash on kb'ers.....,(why I finished that dot sequence with that bloody thing, is a mystery that I may have to ponder for a while)

[Big Dave]

You could probably get away with "photo's" because it's an abbreviation of "photographs".

Was that a reflection on photos or the photo's reflection?

[Daffyd]

Was that a reflection on photos or the photo's reflection?

Now you're confusing me!

[ellipsis]

Now you're confusing me!

...surely being confused is a prerequisite to being here in the first place...

[davebullet]

I brought myself a new dictionary. :facepalm:

Really? I didn't know you could bruy a dictionary.

[MSTRS]

I brought myself a new dictionary. :facepalm:

Really? I didn't know you could bruy a dictionary.

Of course you can. It's printed on stationary...

[Daffyd]

Of course you can. It's printed on stationary...

Speaking of which - the Paper Plus commercials annoy me. "My books, my stationary." (Pronunciation.) Note: NOT pronounciation!

[tri boy]

Is it okay to screw with the Engrish language when your drunk?
If so, then that will be my defence hence forth.

[MSTRS]

Speaking of which - the Paper Plus commercials annoy me. "My books, my stationary." (Pronunciation.) Note: NOT pronounciation!

You should have STOPPED while you were ahead...

[Winston001]

Don't get me fucking started on ellipses. They'll be the fucking death of me. Online social media has much to answer for.

Firstly, ellipses have only three dots. People add lots of dots because they have no idea what they're doing and they think that this somehow looks cool.

Secondly they're generally used where a fullstop or a colon or even a comma would suffice.

Thirdly they're part of a phenomenum about ending sentences with multiple punctuation marks. More than one exclamation mark doesn't make the exclamation any more exclamatory. More than one question mark doesn't make the question any harder or more obscure.

As for wankers who put spaces between the last letter of the word in a sentence and the following punctuation mark: may they simmer for eternity over a steady heat.

I have a theory about predicting the names of the children of punctuation abusers and the colour of the curtains in their front windows...

LOL as a BDOTGNZA pedant nevertheless I'm a bit of a failure. :blink: I didn't know elipses only had 3 dots....

Still, I have to wonder if we shouldn't allow for modern usage? The placement of an extra exclamation mark enforces the point beyond simple emphasis. Its akin to saying "you are kidding" or "believe it". Same for double question marks.

Projecting ideas in writing is very powerful but even so it is a one-dimensional medium. There is little scope for communicating emotion which is why emoticons are so popular. The correct emoticon can turn a nasty comment into a joke, thus drawing out any sting.

Thus we adopt quasi informal grammer and punctuation to phrase the message in a brief form and I believe it works n'est pas....??!! :innocent:

[Hitcher]

Emoticons? Gahh! Thud.

[blackdog]

When will people learn that you can't have a couple of handfuls of anything and that rain can not come down in bucketfuls?

It's 'buckets full' in case any of the neanderthals hadn't figured it out yet.

[scissorhands]

grammer nazis !!226926

[Brian d marge]

私の日本語お輪悪い異も。………dem dot dem dot dem damn dots


Stephen

changing the language.........:facepalm:.........:innocent:.... ..... since Adam were a wee lad