Fuck I smell...

[mashman]

right you gardeny type folk... after planting some fruit trees in some lervely smelly compost, I can't get the stench off my hands... my face, forearms etc... have come up spanky fresh, but my hands still smell like the arse end of a cow

So far I have tried.

Washing up liquid.
Soap.
WD40 (what a stench that caused, bit like spraying rank armpits).
Aftershave (thought I had a winner but ugh, nope).

What next?

[Smokin]

Janola or toothpaste works on manky old fish bait hands a treat

[mashman]

Janola or toothpaste works on manky old fish bait hands a treat

not a clue what Janola is, but the toothpaste seems to be holding its own so far :niceone:... I might be allowed to sleep in my own bed tonight :)

[mattian]

Lemon juice. May have to use a few.... or, white vinegar will work in the same way.

[Oblivion]

I remember hearing somewhere that baking soda is a good way to get rid of bad smells.

[DrunkenMistake]

not a clue what Janola is, but the toothpaste seems to be holding its own so far :niceone:... I might be allowed to sleep in my own bed tonight :)

Bahaha Janola is a creme cleaner for bathrooms and floors and shit,

Baking soda,
Or vinegar

[Usarka]

Use some vanilla.

[BoristheBiter]

right you gardeny type folk... after planting some fruit trees in some lervely smelly compost, I can't get the stench off my hands... my face, forearms etc... have come up spanky fresh, but my hands still smell like the arse end of a cow

So far I have tried.

Washing up liquid.
Soap.
WD40 (what a stench that caused, bit like spraying rank armpits).
Aftershave (thought I had a winner but ugh, nope).

What next?

Did you rub your nose? smell could be up there. Or are you sure it was from the compost?


Seriously, try lemon juice, this works a treat.

[FJRider]

(clothes) Washing powder works a treat ...

Sugar soap ...

Petrol /turps (etc)...

[george formby]

Lemon juice. May have to use a few.... or, white vinegar will work in the same way.

AND baking soda. Cleans anything. Parsley works too but you will get green arms.:Oops:

[Oakie]

Well I used to use a gritty gardening soap or heavy duty hand cleaner (mechanics stuff) but now I avoid the problem altogther by wearing latex gloves. I started doing it last year while I handled the stinky stuff really just to avoid getting some cuts infected but it made the clean up at the end so much quicker that now I just do it anyway. Spinach, runner beans, flat leaf parsley, lettuce and spuds all in this morning and not a speck of dirt to clean off my hands at the end. Just the latex smell!

[Kickaha]

Wear gloves
http://tvnz.co.nz/health-news/record-number-legionnaires-cases-in-canterbury-3997863
http://www.everybody.co.nz/page-4b2e9623-f293-4d35-a280-71b3ecff979c.aspx
Christchurch, New Zealand, 4 Cases from Potting Mix, October 2005
Four people in Christchurch, New Zealand contracted Legionnaires' disease from potting mix and compost bags, including an elderly man who has died. Health officials do not believe that these cases are connected with the outbreak that occurred in Christchurch earlier in 2005

[Usarka]

Wear gloves


I was just out in the garden and thinking the very same thing.

What you doing willis? Picking up shit with your bare hands? Keep that for the bedroom or the glass coffee table!

[mashman]

Did you rub your nose? smell could be up there. Or are you sure it was from the compost?


ha ha ha ha haaaaaaaaa... I did rub my nose a few times, and for a wee while thought that that's what the problem was... so I got the girls to check my hands just to make sure... they were not complimentary (little shits).

I'm guessing a trip to the sex shop for latex gloves is in my near future :)

Cheers for all of the suggestions.

[Vacquer0]

Tomato juice is used for getting rid of skunk sprays on animals/humans. Something about the acid in the juice I think.

[Headbanger]

I use petrol to clean my hands and arms.

Does wonders for the skin.

Also lets you know of any small cuts you may have.

[Vacquer0]

Do you even have farkin skunks down there?

[BMWST?]

go and have a shower and wash your hair...tha will clean your hands up too

[mashman]

Do you even have farkin skunks down there?

they live in beehives here :shifty:



go and have a shower and wash your hair...tha will clean your hands up too


or it'd make my head smell like a cows arse...

[Vacquer0]

Oh, I get it. In NZ the skunks are black with yellow stripes. Cool.:weird:

[avgas]

piss on your hands then have a wank.

won't fix the smell but will make the rest of the things you did today not seem so dirty.

[Headbanger]

piss on your hands then have a wank.

.

God damn, I actually laughed.

[Swoop]

Bahaha Janola is a creme cleaner for bathrooms and floors and shit,
I think you are referring to "Jiff (http://www.unilever.co.nz/brands/homecarebrands/Jif.aspx)".

Oh, I get it. In NZ the skunks are black with yellow stripes. Cool.:weird:
He refers to our politicians who fester inside a building referred to as "The Beehive (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beehive_(New_Zealand))".
A particularly nasty place that any intelligent skunk would stay away from!

[Vacquer0]

Thx for the info, my apologies. I have no use whatsoever for politicians of any kind from anywhere. Whatever defective genes they carry should be isolated and removed from the pool.

[avgas]

He refers to our politicians who fester inside a building referred to as "The Beehive (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beehive_(New_Zealand))".
A particularly nasty place that any intelligent skunk would stay away from!
You sure. We have other pieces of shit with that colour gimp suits.

<iframe width="420" height="345" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/azxT1FW0Vj8" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

[Road kill]

Had this conversation on the Fishing sites I go to.
I use hot water and soap,,,,nothing else.
So here's what your mummy didn't tell you.
Run some hot water in the hand basin,,real hot,,so's you can just keep your hands in there without the skin peeling off.
Soak your hands for a few minites,,,a few in this case is more than "one" ok,,,you want to open some pores,,which are little things that stink gets into,,you can't see em',but just humor me here an believe they do exist ok.
Right, now your hands are nice an soft,which is what stinkin' hot water will do to them,rub ordinary everyday soap all over em' and lather that shit right up into bubbly like bubbles,,,then allow to soak some more,,so the soap gets in the pores see.
After a bit,,which is not quite as long as a few but still more than "one",,place your hands back in the hot water an rub like fuck,,,,your hands man,,,,to get the soap out of the pores.
Shampoo or dishwashing liquid also works real good because both are designed to draw/cut grease,,,but hot water and soap done properly "to open those pores" is better because it doesn't kill the natural oils in your skin and it leaves your hands nice an soft.
Things like aftershave ect are just covers,,you still stink,,it's just a different stink,,,,,soap gets you clean.

[Usarka]

Fingers go wrinkly when soaked in water so that they give more grip.

Can be proved - if you cut your arm off and put it in a hot bath your fingers won't go wrinkly.

Believe it....gasp ventilate....or not.

[mashman]

Fingers go wrinkly when soaked in water so that they give more grip.


Could help



piss on your hands then have a wank.


or should I say, could cum in handy.



won't fix the smell but will make the rest of the things you did today not seem so dirty.

Where's the fun in that? ...

[FJRider]

So here's what your mummy didn't tell you.


Actually ... she DID tell me ...

As a result ... I have a woman in twice a week (more often if feeling dirty) ... to open up my pores ... :innocent:

[mashman]

Shampoo or dishwashing liquid also works real good because both are designed to draw/cut grease,,,but hot water and soap done properly "to open those pores" is better because it doesn't kill the natural oils in your skin and it leaves your hands nice an soft.
Things like aftershave ect are just covers,,you still stink,,it's just a different stink,,,,,soap gets you clean.

Shampoo and soap was a bust (albeit I didn't use hot hot water), as I took two of the girls into the shower with me, washed them both with shampoo and soap and still came out smelling like cows erse...

[BoristheBiter]

Shampoo and soap was a bust (albeit I didn't use hot hot water), as I took two of the girls into the shower with me, washed them both with shampoo and soap and still came out smelling like cows erse...

That is a bit too much info.:facepalm:

[FJRider]

Shampoo and soap was a bust (albeit I didn't use hot hot water), as I took two of the girls into the shower with me, washed them both with shampoo and soap and still came out smelling like cows erse...

As a test ... tell the wife to move ... in a loud voice ... and if the sound of the said word (move) would need more than three o's to spell ... you may indeed have a bovine aroma ... :innocent:

Or ... you've been up to your armpits in ... :shutup:

[mashman]

As a test ... tell the wife to move ... in a loud voice ... and if the sound of the said word (move) would need more than three o's to spell ... you may indeed have a bovine aroma ... :innocent:

Or ... you've been up to your armpits in ... :shutup:

heh, what did one mad cow say to the other :innocent:

[mashman]

That is a bit too much info.:facepalm:

Sorry, replace shampoo and soap with WD40 and vinegar :drinkup:

[fuknKIWI]

Wright's coaltar soap & a scrubbing brush:yes:

[Usarka]

Fist a midget.

[mashman]

Fist a midget.

no I didn't, that's just a wicked rumour.

[Swoop]

You sure. We have other pieces of shit with that colour gimp suits.
Buzzy bee faggots? Sure do smell.

[Oakie]

I'm guessing a trip to the sex shop for latex gloves is in my near future :) .

'Bunnings' in the paint section. About $9 for a box of 100. Oh yeah, I also use them when painting, spraying weeds etc and doing grimey jobs on the bike, car or Mrs Oakie.

[FJRider]

'Bunnings' in the paint section. About $9 for a box of 100. Oh yeah, I also use them when painting, spraying weeds etc and doing grimey jobs on the bike, car or Mrs Oakie.

See a vet ... he has the full arm length one's for the really grimey jobs ... :innocent: