Fess up you Aucklanders

[tri boy]

http://www.nzherald.co.nz/nz/news/article.cfm?c_id=1&objectid=10835890
Must ride a Honda..

[Maha]

Doesn't really say if the eel was on its way in or..coming out :(

Thinking about it, he must have pushed it in/up and its front finns have splayed out....acting like wall toggle.

[nallac]

Wtf..............

[iYRe]

So.. watched a doco on extreme fishing.. and was surprised that there was some "dangerous fish" in NZ's waterways. Turns out it was the eel. And nasty.. very very nasty. They will kill a sheep by going in through any oriface that they can find and pulling out internal organs (they're after things like livers and kidneys etc).

So, yeah.. its:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/River_Monsters#Season_3:_2011

http://animal.discovery.com/fish/river-monsters/new-zealand-longfin-eel.html

It was pretty interesting..

[paturoa]

'ell have a good story to tell the grandkids!

[jasonu]

'ell have a good story to tell the grandkids!

after he's done fiddleing them...

[mashman]

Sounds like a slimey dick to me

[caseye]

Hauled a 2 plus meter eel out of a local river once, dropped concrete blocks on its head, stabbed it through the neck, wound it into a very big plastic pail and kept it out of water for over 24 hours.
Threw it off the bridge back into the river the next day.
Watched it float away and when it had gone about 60 meters it straightened out and swam away.
This eel had previously broken 60 lb breaking strain nylon, then double and then triple braided 60 lb nylon on successive weekends.
Dragged it up a near vertical bank after 15 minutes of continuous fighting on the end of our shark hooked line , it took three 14 yr old's to get it out of the water. Must have been an interesting sight for anyone else, Three prancing young fella's periodically brandishing knives and spears falling on this writhing inner tube and then leaping away again.
Reckon that eel is still there in the River behind Spargo brothers yards.

[Oakie]

Somewhere in South America (I think) there is a small fish that will swim up your penis if you happen to be standing in the water up to knob depth. Sometimes it pays to have a small one I guess.

[Oakie]

Oh, and at least the eel is self lubricating. Better than a vegemite jar anyway.

[Road kill]

Hauled a 2 plus meter eel out of a local river once, dropped concrete blocks on its head, stabbed it through the neck, wound it into a very big plastic pail and kept it out of water for over 24 hours.
Threw it off the bridge back into the river the next day.
Watched it float away and when it had gone about 60 meters it straightened out and swam away.
This eel had previously broken 60 lb breaking strain nylon, then double and then triple braided 60 lb nylon on successive weekends.
Dragged it up a near vertical bank after 15 minutes of continuous fighting on the end of our shark hooked line , it took three 14 yr old's to get it out of the water. Must have been an interesting sight for anyone else, Three prancing young fella's periodically brandishing knives and spears falling on this writhing inner tube and then leaping away again.
Reckon that eel is still there in the River behind Spargo brothers yards.

At 2 meters long that fish was probably close to 100 years old.

People like you need shooting with a ball of your own shit:tugger:

[Usarka]

I used to work in a horsepiddle. ED nurses had the best stories. Most of them went "I was cleaning the window's naked and I fell off and landed on a .....".

[koba]

Hauled a 2 plus meter eel out of a local river once, dropped concrete blocks on its head, stabbed it through the neck, wound it into a very big plastic pail and kept it out of water for over 24 hours.
Threw it off the bridge back into the river the next day.
Watched it float away and when it had gone about 60 meters it straightened out and swam away.
This eel had previously broken 60 lb breaking strain nylon, then double and then triple braided 60 lb nylon on successive weekends.
Dragged it up a near vertical bank after 15 minutes of continuous fighting on the end of our shark hooked line , it took three 14 yr old's to get it out of the water. Must have been an interesting sight for anyone else, Three prancing young fella's periodically brandishing knives and spears falling on this writhing inner tube and then leaping away again.
Reckon that eel is still there in the River behind Spargo brothers yards.

Idiocy.

I used to love catching eels but have stopped now because, even though I'm not that old, I've noticed a real drop in numbers.

This story makes me sad as you could have killed it humanly by smashing it on the tail and then had a real good feed.

It's real stink to hunt/fish for shit and then not kill it cleanly and eat it.

[Berries]

Hauled a 2 plus meter eel out of a local river once, dropped concrete blocks on its head, stabbed it through the neck, wound it into a very big plastic pail and kept it out of water for over 24 hours.
Threw it off the bridge back into the river the next day.
Watched it float away and when it had gone about 60 meters it straightened out and swam away.
This eel had previously broken 60 lb breaking strain nylon, then double and then triple braided 60 lb nylon on successive weekends.
Dragged it up a near vertical bank after 15 minutes of continuous fighting on the end of our shark hooked line , it took three 14 yr old's to get it out of the water. Must have been an interesting sight for anyone else, Three prancing young fella's periodically brandishing knives and spears falling on this writhing inner tube and then leaping away again.
Reckon that eel is still there in the River behind Spargo brothers yards.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, but could you get it up your arse?

[caseye]

Idiocy.

I used to love catching eels but have stopped now because, even though I'm not that old, I've noticed a real drop in numbers.

This story makes me sad as you could have killed it humanly by smashing it on the tail and then had a real good feed.

It's real stink to hunt/fish for shit and then not kill it cleanly and eat it.

First red in a coons age, cheers for that. By the way are you God? or his son?
Just wondering.

Have fished for and caught many eels as a young fella, not many since, this one didn't want to die,I guess we didn't really want to kill it,yes we knew how, even at 14 yrs old.
Your lecture is not appreciated. I fish and I always put back the first one I catch no matter it's size or whether it's a trout or a schnapper.
I hunt and I often don't shoot the first animal I see, I've grown older with my country and I think I've learned alot over the intervening 35 plus years.
You are right, numbers of good edible eels are dwindling fast, at 2 meters ( no shit Sherlock) it was an old eel, most likely that's why even then, at just 14 we made no serious attempt to kill it and were all actually quite glad to see it stir and swim away.
Now I've retold the story I am pleasantly surprised to feel your anger at the "almost" waste but even better, I am able to say without a doubt I'd simply let a grandaddy like him go straight away if it ever happened again.
PS: love smoked eel, or better still, breakfast eel, caught by hand in a small fast flowing stream, two guys, a big rock, both find a hole and put their hand in it, the lucky one pulls the biting ( at normal size, about .09 to a meter, they have teeth like sand paper and don't really hurt too much) eel out of his hole and throws him on the bank.
Tail smacked real hard, gutted and hung on the barbed wire fence till morning, when the embers are nice and hot, yummmmm.

[caseye]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, but could you get it up your arse?

Are you kidding me Mr??? 2 meter long eel, you got any idea the diameter required to assuage that sort of girth???? WELL!
LOL Na i like being da eel with a girly. sorry.

[EJK]

Definitely not the first.

http://www.metro.co.uk/weird/875317-eel-removed-from-mans-bladder-after-entering-penis-during-beauty-spa


http://news.ninemsn.com.au/world/7939609/man-nearly-killed-as-eel-swims-in-bottom

[caseye]

At 2 meters long that fish was probably close to 100 years old.

People like you need shooting with a ball of your own shit:tugger:

You of course have never caught anything as big as this and had an inordinate amount of respect for it's size and power that you didn't , even though you knew how, kill it outright?
Be careful what you say when commenting on short stories that by necessity don't have all of the facts contained within.
I've replied to another here tonight perhaps after reading that you may wish to comment further.

[Bikemad]

Oh, and at least the eel is self lubricating. Better than a vegemite jar anyway.

oh for Petes sake!

[mashman]

Are you kidding me Mr??? 2 meter long eel, you got any idea the diameter required to assuage that sort of girth???? WELL!
LOL Na i like being da eel with a girly. sorry.

heh... we used to pull feckers up about that size in the lobby pots. The fishermans jig, a 2m conga with big pointy teeth gnashing at anything it came near (seen the toe of a welly disappear before). T'was a knife through a triangle on its head that killed it (no way to just grab it and throw it over, as ya say, they're huuuuuge). Of course you had to have balls of steel to go anywhere near its head.

[jasonu]

I knew someone who knew someone who knew someone who know an ER nurse who knew another ER nurse who said Peter Sinclair came in late one night with a marmite jar stuck up his hind end. He claimed he slipped in the shower and fell on it...

[Woodman]

I knew someone who knew someone who knew someone who know an ER nurse who knew another ER nurse who said Peter Sinclair came in late one night with a marmite jar stuck up his hind end. He claimed he slipped in the shower and fell on it...

Ithought it was a light bulb.

[jasonu]

Ithought it was a light bulb.

Na don't be ridiculous, what would a lightbulb be doing in the shower...:facepalm:

[Maha]

Tail smacked real hard, gutted and hung on the barbed wire fence till morning, when the embers are nice and hot, yummmmm.

1960's...lived next door to a Maori family (big on fishing)...they used have eels hanging on the clothes line (one of those long bits or wire from fence to shed held up by a pole things)..and eels in the bath!
They used to scrape the fly blow off the hanging ones before eating, I would assume? :rolleyes:
The mother would like to suck on a fish eye (snapper) until it was clear....:sick:

The irony was...the mothers name was Roe.
I heard my first Jimmy Hendrix song come from that house...Purple Haze.

[BoristheBiter]

Your lecture is not appreciated. I fish and I always put back the first one I catch no matter it's size or whether it's a trout or a schnapper.


was the snapper caught in Germany or imported.:killingme

[skippa1]

First red in a coons age, cheers for that. By the way are you God? or his son?
Just wondering.

Have fished for and caught many eels as a young fella, not many since, this one didn't want to die,I guess we didn't really want to kill it,yes we knew how, even at 14 yrs old.
Your lecture is not appreciated. I fish and I always put back the first one I catch no matter it's size or whether it's a trout or a schnapper.
I hunt and I often don't shoot the first animal I see, I've grown older with my country and I think I've learned alot over the intervening 35 plus years.
You are right, numbers of good edible eels are dwindling fast, at 2 meters ( no shit Sherlock) it was an old eel, most likely that's why even then, at just 14 we made no serious attempt to kill it and were all actually quite glad to see it stir and swim away.
Now I've retold the story I am pleasantly surprised to feel your anger at the "almost" waste but even better, I am able to say without a doubt I'd simply let a grandaddy like him go straight away if it ever happened again.
PS: love smoked eel, or better still, breakfast eel, caught by hand in a small fast flowing stream, two guys, a big rock, both find a hole and put their hand in it, the lucky one pulls the biting ( at normal size, about .09 to a meter, they have teeth like sand paper and don't really hurt too much) eel out of his hole and throws him on the bank.
Tail smacked real hard, gutted and hung on the barbed wire fence till morning, when the embers are nice and hot, yummmmm.

Firstly.....what the fuck is a schnapper????
The common name 'snapper' was given to this fish by Captain James Cook in 1770. He mistook it for a member of the true snapper family Lutjanidae, a group of fish with which he had become familiar in American waters. Although he mistook the fish, he spelt the name correctly, whereas many subsequent writers have used 'schnapper' - an erroneous spelling of unknown origin.
Second....after we
dropped concrete blocks on its head, stabbed it through the neck, wound it into a very big plastic pail and kept it out of water for over 24 hours. you say
we made no serious attempt to kill it and were all actually quite glad to see it stir and swim away Really....no attempt ha?:facepalm:

[Swoop]

Threw it off the bridge back into the river the next day.

Reckon that eel is still there in the River

Sure it wasn't the taniwha down Mercer-way, that the taxpayer had to "give" a lot of money to get rid of?
:blip:

[caseye]

Sure it wasn't the taniwha down Mercer-way, that the taxpayer had to "give" a lot of money to get rid of?
:blip:


Skippa, a schnapper is a Germanic snapper sometimes found on your plate in some very posh restaurants didn'tcha know?

Love those double barrels there Swoop.
Hell no this ol Eel was much bigger than the Mercer, Taniwha.
It's probably still alive and kicking now I reckon,it definitely shook it's self and swam off, didn't just float away or worse sink.
An ordinary working foreman dispatched that ol Mercer Taniwha imposter with a double barreled shotgun I believe.
Lucky he did aye, esle we'd all still be navigating that stretch of highway in waka.

[Big Dave]

I used to work in a horsepiddle. ED nurses had the best stories. Most of them went "I was cleaning the window's naked and I fell off and landed on a .....".

Yea. My girl was an OR Sister in Paddington, Sydney when we met. It was a risky job removing the new shape Rexona cans that had gone 'all the way' - before body heat caused them to rupture.

Reminds me of that old gag:

Customer: I'd like some deodorant please.
Shop Assistant: Certainly sir, Ball or Aerosol?
Customer: No, underarm.

[Big Dave]

Schnapper is sometimes used on restaurant menus on this side of t' dutch. Same thing.

There was a Soft Core porn flick - Cinderella 1977 - that had a song in it entitled 'The Kingdom has a snapper', and it wasn't taking about fish.

[jasonu]

Schnapper is sometimes used on restaurant menus on this side of t' dutch. Same thing.

There was a Soft Core porn flick - Cinderella 1977 - that had a song in it entitled 'The Kingdom has a snapper', and it wasn't taking about fish.

Prolly smelt like fish though...

[Road kill]

You of course have never caught anything as big as this and had an inordinate amount of respect for it's size and power that you didn't , even though you knew how, kill it outright?
Be careful what you say when commenting on short stories that by necessity don't have all of the facts contained within.
I've replied to another here tonight perhaps after reading that you may wish to comment further.

I see hundreds of them that big every time I go into the Mohaka and a couple of other North island rivers.

I don't need to kill something to respect it.

In fact,that's just bloody strange so I'll stand by my comments thanks.

[nallac]

270614
.................................................. .....

[Akzle]

there used to be a saying... "only in america"

[1billyboy]

That looks a bit fishy to me.:buggerd:

[\m/]

Update: http://www.stuff.co.nz/national/health/8560745/Eel-X-ray-hospital-staff-disciplined

Thirty-three staff at Auckland City Hospital have been punished for looking at X-rays and information on a man who had an eel stuck up his bottom.

Staff were sacked, given verbal warnings, written warnings and final written warnings after an investigation found there was no legitimate reason to access the patients records.

The majority of the privacy breaches were from looking at the man's radiology images on a computer, but some staff also looked at the his blood test results and the discharge summary.

The privacy breach stretched to the distribution of information to public and media.

The disciplinary action was the result of a six-month investigation into the breach.

"The findings are disappointing, to say the least, but we are taking action to ensure compliance with Auckland DHB policy in future," said Auckland District Health Board Chief Executive Ailsa Claire.

"Now we must ensure this situation serves to highlight and build understanding of our privacy obligations to our patients," she said.

The patient sought medical attention in September 2012, after the eel became lodged in his lower stomach.

Doctors at Auckland Hospital had to surgically remove the eel, hospital sources said.

The x-ray of the eel stuck in the man was the topic of hospital gossip after it was emailed out, in what was a major breach of the patient's privacy.

The case became world news after it was leaked to the media.

A total of 49 staff, including six senior medical officers, 21 junior doctors, 20 nurses or midwives and two scientific and technical health staff, were initially investigated.

"One of the fundamental responsibilities of working in a healthcare environment is showing respect for patients' rights to privacy," said Claire when the investigation was launched.

"I take that responsibility very seriously indeed and I expect our staff to work and act at all times with a level of professionalism that honours the trust our patients place in us," she said.

All ADHB staff would now be required to re-sign a confidentiality agreement each year.

The patient did not make a complaint but had remained fully informed throughout the investigation, and had been issued an apology.
Disciplinary action? For making people laugh? :facepalm:

[jasonu]

Update: http://www.stuff.co.nz/national/health/8560745/Eel-X-ray-hospital-staff-disciplined

Disciplinary action? For making people laugh? :facepalm:

Totally gay...

[PrincessBandit]

oh for Petes sake!

Haha, first thing I thought of when the jar was mentioned...

I also loved, from the article:

Eels are secretive, nocturnal and prefer habitats with plenty of cover. They hunt by smell rather than sight. Hohohohohohohoho, that eel would be pretty stinky I'd imagine. Poor thing, i wonder what on earth it did to deserve that!

[tri boy]

The creek at the bottom, (pun intended) of chez tri boys has a healthy supply of eels, that are being fed regularly, to fatten them up for you Aucklanders:msn-wink:
(If you don,t believe me, then ask Dino3310)