Young chicks, BJs and pineapple juice

[ellipsis]

Waiting for pizzas recently, my wife and I had to put up with some very young girls, too plump for their age and dressed in barbie dolls clothes talking very loudly while their noses were shoved into their i- phone screens. The conversation was fairly naive banter about boys and sex and spoken loudly enough to be heard by all, and to shock us 'old folks'. It degenerated into bj's and swallowing and was interspersed with lots of 'omg' and 'gross' and 'yuk'

One little fatty who wanted to be louder and more 'experienced', than the others, told her mates and everyone else within three or four meters, " if her boyfriend wanted the full on bj with results , he had to drink pineapple juice before the act...it doesn't taste so bad then".

My wife and I mused on silly little girls and our pizza and such on the drive home. Passing the last dairy before we got on the highway, I suggested that we might stop so I could get some milk and maybe some pineapple juice, to which she replied, "What the fuck do you want pineapple juice for, you dont even like the stuff and if you were thinking of waving that thing near my lips, think again, Bobbitt......"

Now in my close to sixty years on this planet and having been around a bit, it will come as no surprise to many, that one of my lifelong observations is that if you want the truth dont ask a woman...you will only get their version of what they wish you to believe or lies. Coupled with the fact that I wouldn't feel all that comfortable with raising my question with just any woman that I happened to know or have dealings with...so the question I have remains hanging, unanswered or verified. Then it came to me like a bolt from the blue. 'KB will have the answer, some of the smartest bod's I know cast their wisdom and knowledge around there.' In particular there are three minds here who fit all the criteria I need to answer my question, Mr D, Boris the Biter and Oscar ...they are male, I presume, in the realms of the most know all keyboard warriors on the ether and they are the biggest cock-suckers on here.

It's a simple question really. Is it true that pineapple juice will make a blokes seed taste like a tropical fruit, and if it is confirmed as true, do they have a particular brand of pineapple juice they favour, or should it be fresh.

Thanks in advance Mr D, Boris and Oscar

[Mental Trousers]

It does made a difference, for both men and women.

Ask Mrs ellipsis to drink a fair bit of pineapple juice and then get busy with your tongue. Maybe she'll reciprocate ;)

[jellywrestler]

maybe it's to rinse out afterwards

[mashman]

Tuna sandwiches FTW.

[scissorhands]

Those 3 KB members mostly suck satans cock, and I think they're too afraid to ask, due to battered wife syndrome .

Dont forget the talking horse Mr Ed, hes probably done some research

[unstuck]

William James "B. J." Surhoff Was the founder and president of "Pathfinders for autism". :shifty:

[cynna]

pineapple juice is for the girls to drink so i have been told

[awa355]

If men have to put up with custard,:Oi: women can get to like Pineapple.

[AllanB]

I checked for you and there is nothing about pineapple juice in my Honda's owners manual.

[gammaguy]

So clearly at the moment most women are drinking vinegar milkshakes and most guys are drinking salted yogurt:eek5:

[Madness]

Bosslady will be along shortly to enlighten us.

[mrchips]

Smother the old fella with wipped cream & Sherbet with a cherry on top for added pizzazz.

If that don't do the trick, the dog will thank you for it :done:

[Woodman]

put heaps of Vodka in the pineapplejuice and give it to the lady to drink, and then another and so on.........

[george formby]

Here ya go........

<iframe width="560" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/P1k1Dy1mVeQ" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

[BigAl]

So........ Any of you girls out there like the taste of chocolate:blip:

[unstuck]

I really like pineapple lumps too. Chocolate and pineapple.:blip:

[Laava]

Smother the old fella with wipped cream & Sherbet with a cherry on top for added pizzazz.

If that don't do the trick, the dog will thank you for it :done:

I have done that! Looked so fucken good I ate it myself!

[sketch]

during a phase i went through drinking at least a box of tropical just juice a day my gf at the time commented that it tasted better...... but i always found her drinking a couple of jim beams too many was more effective in getting her to guzzle the shit back....

[george formby]

I have done that! Looked so fucken good I ate it myself!

The minds eye is a terrible thing. You will forever be a stooped knob gobbler after that bit of banter.

To ease my pain I imagine you used a spoon.

[mashman]

If that don't do the trick, the dog will thank you for it :done:

That is a reference to the household pet right :shifty:

[Oakie]

There was a story about a Mrs Blewitt on TV tonight. I wonder if she did.

[Smifffy]

The minds eye is a terrible thing. You will forever be a stooped knob gobbler after that bit of banter.

To ease my pain I imagine you used a spoon.

It wasn't the mind's eye he was talking about...

[Berries]

So........ Any of you girls out there like the taste of chocolate:blip:
I do like my strawberry cheesecake. (http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=strawberry+cheesecake)

[avgas]

I love women who eat lots of fruit. However be careful gents if they eat too much and gets too excited your goatee will get a new shade of brown :crazy::eek5:

[PrincessBandit]

I think the most unpalatable part of the OP is the fact that these girls obviously felt the need to share their worldly experience (real, imagined or exaggerated) with everyone within earshot. In my experience of overhearing conversations that one wouldn't usually consider public material, it's often n00bs boasting that they're "getting some" at last. Most people to whom these things are not a new experience don't feel the need to share with all and sundry.

[unstuck]

I think the most unpalatable part of the OP is the fact that these girls obviously felt the need to share their worldly experience (real, imagined or exaggerated) with everyone within earshot. In my experience of overhearing conversations that one wouldn't usually consider public material, it's often n00bs boasting that they're "getting some" at last. Most people to whom these things are not a new experience don't feel the need to share with all and sundry.

Teenage girls are stupid stupid creatures, unless your a teenage boy of course.:lol:

[Laava]

The minds eye is a terrible thing. You will forever be a stooped knob gobbler after that bit of banter.

To ease my pain I imagine you used a spoon.

I love a good spooning!

[avgas]

Most people to whom these things are not a new experience don't feel the need to share with all and sundry.
So now for you sucking cock is like smoking a fine pipe?
http://cigarettehouse.net/img_news/pipe_smoking.jpg

[98tls]

No idea about the pineapple but can vouch for a Baileys,stayed a night in the Museum hotel in Wellington years back and the chick i was with starts getting liberal with said Baileys so when in Rome etc i return the favour,there was though a fucking mess in the bed come morning:facepalm:looked like someone had shit all through the bed so we paid the bill and boosted....looking back maybe she did shit all through the bed? Crazy bitch though fun at the time.:wings:

[MisterD]

Early-onset dementia is a terrible thing, so it is.

[Big Dave]

Early-onset dementia is a terrible thing, so it is.

Just another addition to the ignore list pal.

[5150]

Not speaking from experience, but I hear that Jack Danniels is good for getting rid of the aftertaste :sick:

[T.W.R]

I really like pineapple lumps too. Chocolate and pineapple.:blip:


I love women who eat lots of fruit. However be careful gents if they eat too much and gets too excited your goatee will get a new shade of brown :crazy::eek5:


:lol: spot the comparison :shutup:

But remember :yes:

[Banditbandit]

Teenage girls are stupid stupid creatures, unless your a teenage boy of course.:lol:

Yes - see that's why oral sex IS best - you don't have to listen to them while they do it

[c4.]

Not speaking from experience, but I hear that Jack Danniels is good for getting rid of the aftertaste :sick:

Reminds me of the joke about young guy who walks into a bar and orders 6 shots of whiskey.
The barman lines him up 6 shots and watches gobsmacked as he throws them down 1 after the other until they were gone.

"Wow" says the barman, "what was that about?"

The young guy replies, "well, I just had my fist experience of a blowjob!"

"Congratulations mate, here's another shot on the house" says the barman.

"WTF" says the young guy, "if I can't get the taste out after 6 shots, how's another gonna help?"

[mashman]

Yes - see that's why oral sex IS best - you don't have to listen to them while they do it

But is risking cancer worth it?

[cynna]

That is a reference to the household pet right :shifty:


think i might call the spca

[mashman]

think i might call the spca

The special people collection association?

[mashman]

:lol: spot the comparison :shutup:

But remember ... :yes:

Their lips met... she closed her legs and crushed his glasses.

[c4.]

Only on KB;)

[T.W.R]

Their lips met... she closed her legs and crushed his glasses.

alls safe though, he can breath through his ears :lol:

[mashman]

alls safe though, he can breath through his ears :lol:

It would explain certain oddities in this world though.

http://cdn-s3.orlandocity.com/articles_pictures/Blue-Man-Group-closeup.jpg

[Berries]

Just out of interest, what pizza place was this?

[AllanB]

Just out of interest, what pizza place was this?

Pretty sure she had ordered double anchovies on the top ...........

[sugilite]

I remember reading an interview with a porn star, and she did mention the guys drinking pineapple juice to make it taste better.
Sorry to answer OP's question n all ;)

[Laava]

[I[/I]We need to do some definitive KB testing. I am able to supply both the pineapple juice and the semen. All we need now is some young moisties to test!

[98tls]

[I[/I]We need to do some definitive KB testing. I am able to supply both the pineapple juice and the semen. All we need now is some young moisties to test!

Dunno about the "young" thing eh,called into maccas the other day to grab a burger for lunch and :facepalm:fuck me it was like walking into a marae on open day there was hundreds of "young moisties" all on the graze with flab n bellys overflowing everywhere,only thing moist on em would be the lube applied to stop the chaffing,fucking disgusting.

[Laava]

Haha! I was telling the wife only the other day about "moisties" and she had never heard that term. Haven't heard it for years myself but it is making me laugh at the moment.

[julzbabe1]

But is risking cancer worth it?

hahaha thats a good 1 sure makes sense:killingme