View Full Version : Is it a criminal offence if I...
HenryDorsetCase
11th July 2014, 14:11
OK, I'll start.
Is it a criminal offence if I:
Notice a fatty in a shitbox people mover behind me at a set of lights who is not looking up but looking down at phone in lap and fucking texting (clearly fatty has committed two offences already, viz: 1) being a fatty and thus stealing my oxygen; and 2) texting). I drive off then fatty eventually notices and drives after being beeped at by the citizen behind her. We stop at the next set of lights with fatty behind me again (Yay, Christchurch roads).
Is it a criminal offence if I then commence to back into her shitbox, say eight or ten times, to make sure the CUNT IS PAYING ATTENTION?
well, is it?
Gremlin
11th July 2014, 14:16
Could have been an emergency? (yeah right).
I've passed people on motorways, urban roads etc and beeped and pointed at them when I see them texting away etc. Most drop the mobile in complete shock. Wonder if they draw the conclusion... never saw him coming, lucky they weren't a cop.
Pity I'm not a cop... :oi-grr:
iranana
11th July 2014, 14:18
if you hit that shitbox, then yeah it would be. if you're just getting cozy, rolling forward and repeating... then i'm not sure. i would assume that there's some kind of rule about staying stationary at the lights
Murray
11th July 2014, 14:36
(clearly fatty has committed two offences already, viz: 1) being a fatty and thus stealing my oxygen;
They should get a medal for that.
FAT BIKERS RULE OK!!!!!!
James Deuce
11th July 2014, 14:48
No, the person behind is always in the wrong.
BigAl
11th July 2014, 14:52
Prolly not if your are a;
1. maori prince
2. sports person who plays/may play overseas
3. malaysian diplomat
Bikemad
11th July 2014, 14:53
OK, I'll start.
Is it a criminal offence if I:
Notice a fatty in a shitbox people mover behind me at a set of lights who is not looking up but looking down at phone in lap and fucking texting (clearly fatty has committed two offences already, viz: 1) being a fatty and thus stealing my oxygen; and 2) texting). I drive off then fatty eventually notices and drives after being beeped at by the citizen behind her. We stop at the next set of lights with fatty behind me again (Yay, Christchurch roads).
Is it a criminal offence if I then commence to back into her shitbox, say eight or ten times, to make sure the CUNT IS PAYING ATTENTION?
well, is it?
hang on.....aern't you a lawyer
No, the person behind is always in the wrong.
unless the other vehicle is reversing
awa355
11th July 2014, 14:53
Miserable bastards save money for their retirement.
Fatties save food and beer for theirs.
http://i1074.photobucket.com/albums/w420/awa355/Untitledpicture-23.png
jasonu
11th July 2014, 15:24
OK, I'll start.
Is it a criminal offence if I:
Notice a fatty in a shitbox people mover behind me at a set of lights who is not looking up but looking down at phone in lap and fucking texting (clearly fatty has committed two offences already, viz: 1) being a fatty and thus stealing my oxygen; and 2) texting). I drive off then fatty eventually notices and drives after being beeped at by the citizen behind her. We stop at the next set of lights with fatty behind me again (Yay, Christchurch roads).
Is it a criminal offence if I then commence to back into her shitbox, say eight or ten times, to make sure the CUNT IS PAYING ATTENTION?
well, is it?
It shouldn't be.
buggerit
11th July 2014, 15:31
This is a public service and you WILL be mentioned in the Queens birthday honours list:lol:
Geeen
11th July 2014, 15:59
This is a public service and you WILL be mentioned in the Queens birthday honours list:lol:
What he said ^^^^ They can't be too fat if they still have a lap... I seen a fair few with their gut on the steering wheel :eek5::eek5:
The Reibz
11th July 2014, 16:05
You seem rather mad over simple everyday shit that everyone has to deal with...
Blackbird
11th July 2014, 16:06
Could have been an emergency? (yeah right).
I've passed people on motorways, urban roads etc and beeped and pointed at them when I see them texting away etc. Most drop the mobile in complete shock. Wonder if they draw the conclusion... never saw him coming, lucky they weren't a cop.
Pity I'm not a cop... :oi-grr:
BMW, yellow helmet, hi-viz - what's the bet that a lot of 'em THINK you're a cop for that bowel-loosening moment during which they drop the phone :innocent:
Banditbandit
11th July 2014, 16:07
OK, I'll start.
Is it a criminal offence if I:
Notice a fatty in a shitbox people mover behind me at a set of lights who is not looking up but looking down at phone in lap and fucking texting (clearly fatty has committed two offences already, viz: 1) being a fatty and thus stealing my oxygen; and 2) texting). I drive off then fatty eventually notices and drives after being beeped at by the citizen behind her. We stop at the next set of lights with fatty behind me again (Yay, Christchurch roads).
Is it a criminal offence if I then commence to back into her shitbox, say eight or ten times, to make sure the CUNT IS PAYING ATTENTION?
well, is it?
You know people behave like fuckwits .. why do you let their behaviour rile you up and spoil your day?
James Deuce
11th July 2014, 16:08
unless the other vehicle is reversing
So turn around and drive into the idiot. Have you NO imagination?
Akzle
11th July 2014, 16:33
a criminal offense requires a crime.
a crime requires an injured party.
So yes. Come on lawerjew. This is right up your alley. Not enough good weed down your way huh?
I do, however, endorse euthanasing fat fucks. For the good of society and whatnot.
nzspokes
11th July 2014, 17:28
Could have been an emergency? (yeah right).
I've passed people on motorways, urban roads etc and beeped and pointed at them when I see them texting away etc. Most drop the mobile in complete shock. Wonder if they draw the conclusion... never saw him coming, lucky they weren't a cop.
Pity I'm not a cop... :oi-grr:
Ive found knocking on the window has more effect.
FJRider
11th July 2014, 17:51
OK, I'll start.
Is it a criminal offence if I:
Notice a fatty in a shitbox people mover behind me at a set of lights who is ....
NO ... they are "Parked" at the lights and are not driving.
At worst .. they are "Hindering the flow of traffic" if they are slow (off the lights) :(
.. is it a criminal offence if I then commence to back into her shitbox, say eight or ten times, to make sure the CUNT IS PAYING ATTENTION?
well, is it?
Ummmmmmmmm :beer: ... yes .. :lol:
unstuck
11th July 2014, 17:56
Stupid humans.
FJRider
11th July 2014, 18:03
a criminal offense requires a crime.
On the roads ... it's a Traffic infringement. NO Criminal activity involved ... :argh:
a crime requires an injured party.
If you are in FRONT of said fatty ... how can you be "Injured" by their activities .. ??? :scratch:
So yes. Come on lawerjew. This is right up your alley. Not enough good weed down your way huh?
Judging by the original post ...I think the OP has (had) enough ... :innocent:
I do, however, endorse euthanasing fat fucks. For the good of society and whatnot.
I agree ... :yes:
jellywrestler
11th July 2014, 18:28
lucky they weren't a cop.
cops are doing fuck all about it in wellington, if not nothing, it's widespread here.
R650R
11th July 2014, 18:34
You should have asked;
With fatty being so close to death through poor physical condition is it illegal to gift them some junk food.
Really why give yourself an ulcer over someone else's bad habits. I used to get wound up too but after zero response and feedback to multiple *555 and even 111 calls about cars over taking truck on blind corners etc, I thought if the police don't give a F#%* why should I.
Anyway after giving up and leaving it to Darwin, my blood pressure was lowered and life was cruiser.
Sure enough Darwin proved his point with a Camry sedan that overtook on a blind left hander (as well as 20m of truck blocking his view) at top of Atiamuri ending up rolled in a ditch at Tokoroa.
Ribit
11th July 2014, 18:42
Break the window, grab the phone and throw it away.
Problem solved.
Tazz
11th July 2014, 19:15
Break the window, grab the phone and throw it away.
Problem solved.
Make a few questionable calls that will show up on the phone bill to a Scandinavian 0900 number first.
Big Dave
11th July 2014, 19:30
Dude. You have *got* to stop listening to the Henry Rollins Band.
You know the cure for an OD? We intervene and make you watch consecutive episodes of Eric Idle's Rutland Weekend Television.
HenryDorsetCase
11th July 2014, 20:07
Dude. You have *got* to stop listening to the Henry Rollins Band.
You know the cure for an OD? We intervene and make you watch consecutive episodes of Eric Idle's Rutland Weekend Television.
If ever the cure was worse than the disease......
People seem to have the wrong idea: I am not a fat angry middle aged white man. I've lost quite a bit of weight lately through virtue and exercise.
:)
^ smiley face.
Swoop
11th July 2014, 20:09
Is it a criminal offence if I then commence to back into her shitbox, say eight or ten times, to make sure the CUNT IS PAYING ATTENTION?
NO!
Tubby McFartstain was obviously following too closely.
Bitch-Slap that cow with a ticket and clip an ear tag onto her heifer arse.
caspernz
12th July 2014, 12:07
Obtain supply of golf balls, practice lobbing...that's all I'll say on the subject :innocent:
mrchips
12th July 2014, 13:15
it's widespread here.
Yep, i see heaps of these txters on my commutes. The problem with policing them is catching the sneeky buggers in the act.... hopefully, before it's too late. :oi-grr:
ellipsis
12th July 2014, 13:58
...is it legal to txt or phone whilst stopped at the lights?...I was surrounded by yakkers and txters one day last week, while at a set of lights, but the cop who was also surrounded by them didn't seem or want to notice...one didn't give a fuck that me trying to overtake a tourist in a 'wicked camper', doing 55k on the highway and who then sped up and kept me from getting back into the left lane, was at fault for me doing, (having to do), 102 ks with my trailer to get past the fucking idiots...(maybe this should have been in the Friday Night Rants thread)...
cynna
12th July 2014, 14:36
whats worse - speeding on a bike or texting at the lights?
ellipsis
12th July 2014, 14:45
whats worse - speeding on a bike or texting at the lights?
...probably texting while speeding on a bike at night with no lights, would be a little dangerous...
Big Dave
12th July 2014, 15:14
whats worse - speeding on a bike or texting at the lights?
Texting on a bike while speeding.
awa355
12th July 2014, 22:53
This is NOT texting ok??
http://i1074.photobucket.com/albums/w420/awa355/Untitledpicture-24.png
scumdog
12th July 2014, 22:57
OK, I'll start.
Is it a criminal offence if I:
Notice a fatty in a shitbox people mover behind me at a set of lights who is not looking up but looking down at phone in lap and fucking texting (clearly fatty has committed two offences already, viz: 1) being a fatty and thus stealing my oxygen; and 2) texting). I drive off then fatty eventually notices and drives after being beeped at by the citizen behind her. We stop at the next set of lights with fatty behind me again (Yay, Christchurch roads).
Is it a criminal offence if I then commence to back into her shitbox, say eight or ten times, to make sure the CUNT IS PAYING ATTENTION?
well, is it?
Another question: Would you tap her? :msn-wink:(Or any one of her immeasurable wrinkles)
awayatc
13th July 2014, 08:04
Way to do that,
if you thus inclined,
is to work your way through the wrinkles untill you hit shit....
then just go back one.....
Banditbandit
14th July 2014, 11:54
This is NOT texting ok??
Harley rider .. says it all ..
imdying
14th July 2014, 12:05
Only if you're ramming them with such force as they could practicably argue you're trying to injure or kill them. Otherwise it's purely a civil matter in'it?
HenryDorsetCase
14th July 2014, 12:40
Another question: Would you tap her? :msn-wink:(Or any one of her immeasurable wrinkles)
I wouldn't touch her with yours.
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