Return to work after holidays-time to reassess

[skippa1]

Well, been off since the 24th of December and go back to work this Monday the 16th of Jan.

Have had some good time to look back at 2016....shit year. Wrecked bike, lost leg, busted back, pushing and striving to get "back to normal"....whatever that is. Cant help but find myself thinking that working in a job that pays really really well but requires super long hours, worry and responsibility and impinges on my downtime with constant emails and phone calls is wasting valuable time that I have been given a second chance to enjoy. Debit by way of mortgages dictate the current level of earnings required......current level of equity doesnt mean cashing up will make any real tangible difference, particularly as the new tax regs around investment properties would negate any capital gain......my timing was impeccable.....

so who out there has mad a sea change decision and how did it pan out?

[Katman]

There's no harm in lowered expectations bro.

[skippa1]

There's no harm in lowered expectations bro.
Agreed......the decision sort of destabilises what stability there is though.......feel a bit backed into a corner though at the moment. Not sure the better half could deal with too much more at the moment either

[Akzle]

i'm fucken baws.

your human experience is a one way thing, why waste it playing the jewgame™

[Voltaire]

i'm fucken baws.

your human experience is a one way thing, why waste it playing the jewgame™

Tell us more about your off grid, self sufficient lifestyle, we might all give up the race and go feral too.

[Katman]

Tell us more about your off grid, self sufficient lifestyle, we might all give up the race and go feral too.

You almost sound proud to live in Auckland.

[Voltaire]

You almost sound proud to live in Auckland.

Whats not to like?

[Woodman]

I would love to be one of those guys that is happy just pottering around in the garden growing my own veges and stuff but I would get bored out of my tiny mind inside a week.

[Oakie]

...wasting valuable time that I have been given a second chance to enjoy.

Had similar cause to reflect earlier this week when the woman I work with had a seizure at work which has been shown to be due to a brain tumour. It is benign so she will return to work but she cannot drive for a year now which at age 69 leaves her at the good graces of others to transport her around and she does go out quite a bit. Make time to enjoy stuff while you still can. I was pretty determined that I was going to work until I am 68 but just reviewing that now.

[pritch]

Whats not to like?

Enough to convince me to make a largely successful effort to avoid the place. OK I was born there, I couldn't do much about that, and I did go to high school there. My sporting interests required visits to South Auckland but other than that my visits have been rare.

Auckland is foreign territory, in parts it doesn't even resemble New Zealand. Aucklanders should have to apply for a passport to travel south of the Bombays. :whistle:

[pritch]

I didn't want to be still working at 70 but there is always the temptation to work just a little longer, to pay for one more thing for the house or whatever. I managed to retire at 69. There is still stuff needs doing to the house but... One woman I worked with died suddenly and I thought bugger working all your life. My income is modest enough but I can still run the bike and afford the odd toy - fingers crossed.

Skippa your situation is different but I wish you well.

[mossy1200]

Aucklanders should have to apply for a passport to travel south of the Bombays. :whistle:

If you do that they will think travelling South has become trendy. Perhaps not a good idea.

[ellipsis]

...With a medical situation suddenly thrust on me at the, just about 60 year, when a few weeks prior things were looking like running to the 'plan', has had my head a bit fucked up, pissed off and angry-ish at the situation...can't do a thing apart from change a lot of stuff in life, listen to medics who don't really know fuck all themselves, it seems and try a formulate a new plan for the future...I have a couple of other strings to my bow that I can fall back on, which is fortunate, as many others in similar situations may not have any alternate options...but some things that seemed do-able in the future are now out the window and that thing that has been 'in the future' and further off than I had anticipated has arrived a decade or two too early and I am completely unprepared for it...I'm having to go back to work next week, ready or not, half incapacitated and wondering if I can actually do it...wisdom doesn't always come with age but you can guarantee, pain, change and falling apart...

[nzspokes]

Well, been off since the 24th of December and go back to work this Monday the 16th of Jan.

Have had some good time to look back at 2016....shit year. Wrecked bike, lost leg, busted back, pushing and striving to get "back to normal"....whatever that is. Cant help but find myself thinking that working in a job that pays really really well but requires super long hours, worry and responsibility and impinges on my downtime with constant emails and phone calls is wasting valuable time that I have been given a second chance to enjoy. Debit by way of mortgages dictate the current level of earnings required......current level of equity doesnt mean cashing up will make any real tangible difference, particularly as the new tax regs around investment properties would negate any capital gain......my timing was impeccable.....

so who out there has mad a sea change decision and how did it pan out?

Im a little in the same boat apart from the losing the leg thing and we pretty much own the house now. But I dont want to be doing the same thing in 10 years time. Being 50 this year Ive decided to go back to study and upskill. Be the guy handing the shit down not the guy doing the shit.

Any chance to upskill?

[oldrider]

Life is an amazing gift - problem is other people exercising their gift have too much influence on how each of us exercise ours! :doh:

Auckland is a great place thats why more people prefer to be there fucking it up for each other! :kick: ......... best to simply avoid it these days :rolleyes:

[Crasherfromwayback]

Whats not to like?

The size of the fucking place, the amount of people in the fucking place, and the traffic in the fucking place. Other than that...quite nice! :wacko:

[onearmedbandit]

I can empathise a little with your situation. After my accident in '97 despite the loss of use of my arm and never-ending excruciating pain I was steadfast in my opinion that I should live a 'normal' life still. Took me 16 years to realise that that's not entirely possible. Dealing with all the stresses of work etc plus coping with my situation and believing I needed to live up to my high expectations of myself was slowly doing me in. About 3 years ago I decided I couldn't keep doing that to myself.

It's not been easy. My income has dropped significantly but I have enough to get by and enjoy life. Not working and feeling like I'm contributing and achieving has been hard to adjust to. Not having the social aspect of work is another thing. But my life is ten fold better now. I now have time to deal with the pain, I can take time out when I need to just let the pain do its thing rather than having to dedicate 100% of my concentration to just stand up let alone listen to a customer. I no longer have to convince myself through lies that everything is alright. I can now accept that it's not, and I can do that without having to worry about deadlines etc.

I don't know what will happen next in my life, but I'm comfortable with that.

[oldiebutagoody]

To the OP,

I can empathise with anyone questioning why they bother going on with a daily struggle but feeling trapped due to commitments.

One thing I learned is that there is only one constant in life, and that is change. It can be sort of comfortable to stick with a situation despite not being happy with it. However the result of that is stress, if you feel it is out of your control and what you do want to make you happy today is also out of your control.

Here is the thing, nothing is directly under our own control. So I made a concious decision not to try and "control" or minutely preplan my life or that of anyone else I come into contact with. I wake up each morning expecting the unexpected, and embracing what the day brings no matter what.

Don't get me wrong I still have goals and etc, but I leave that to my subconcious mind to make decisions and choices that will lead me there over time. I just don't get all twisted about not having what I want now, or the job I want now, or the freedom and money I wat NOW, NOW NOW......

After my Wife died I only made one decision,....just be open to change, open to anything that comes my way, good or bad as I probably had not control over it. However one big thing makes me confident in the future, and that is being open to change allows you to have a mindset open to taking BIG opportunities when they present themselves rather than holding back because you are comfortable or feeling trapped. Grab opportunities with both hands and wring them for all they are worth. Bad times and bad experiences are opportunities for change, you just have to be open to taking advantage,

As for the Wife, ask her whether she would rather live with you feeling depressed and anxious, or confident and adaptable. Which do you think is going to be better for you, her and your relationship. Even if no change, at least the conversation has been had.......which helps form a shared understanding of being open to grabbing opportunities instead of feeling helpless and trapped.

I have never felt so in control of my life, career, recreational riding, finances,....as when I gave up feeling like I had to stay the stable course. I have a freehold house (sold up the big one and bought smaller cheaper), two debt free bikes (bought older with cash rather than HP newer), on old crappy hiace van, always play money in the bank rather than credit cards and loans, I am now management (shifted from Auckland Council to a Lower North Island Council) but workers don't feel I micromanage them, so win win all around.

Make the change Bro.

To achieve something you have never achieved before, you have to do something you have never done before.

[Akzle]

I can empathise with anyone questioning why they bother going on with a daily struggle but feeling trapped due to commitments.

One thing I learned is that there is only one constant in life, and that is change. It can be sort of comfortable to stick with a situation despite not being happy with it. However the result of that is stress, if you feel it is out of your control and what you do want to make you happy today is also out of your control.

Here is the thing, nothing is directly under our own control. So I made a concious decision not to try and "control" or minutely preplan my life or that of anyone else I come into contact with. I wake up each morning expecting the unexpected, and embracing what the day brings no matter what.

Don't get me wrong I still have goals and etc, but I leave that to my subconcious mind to make decisions and choices that will lead me there over time. I just don't get all twisted about not having what I want now, or the job I want now, or the freedom and money I wat NOW, NOW NOW......

After my Wife died I only made one decision,....just be open to change, open to anything that comes my way, good or bad as I probably had not control over it. However one big thing makes me confident in the future, and that is being open to change allows you to have a mindset open to taking BIG opportunities when they present themselves rather than holding back because you are comfortable or feeling trapped. Grab opportunities with both hands and wring them for all they are worth. Bad times and bad experiences are opportunities for change, you just have to be open to taking advantage,

As for the Wife, ask her whether she woud rather live with you feeling depressed and anxious, or confident and adaptable. Which do you think is going to be better for you, her and your relationship. Even if no change, at least the conversation has been had.......which helps form a shared understanding of being open to grabbing opportunities instead of feeling helpless and trapped.

I have never felt so in control of my life, career, recreational riding, finances,....as when I gave up feeling like I had to stay the stable course. I have a freehold house, two debt free bikes, on old crappy hiace van, I am now management but workers don't feel I micromanage them, so win win all around.

Make the change Bro.

To achieve something you have never achieved before, you have to do something you have never done before.

rbgiafp .

[oldiebutagoody]

rbgiafp .

Awww c'mon Ax just pretend for a minute that I don't understand what that acronym means.

wtf?

[Akzle]

Awww c'mon Ax just pretend for a minute that I don't understand what that acronym means.

wtf?

"rep, but gremlin is a fucking pussy" - have too many infarctions so can't rep you now.

[oldiebutagoody]

" have too many infarctions .


Lmao

That happens as we all get older, but the thought is appreciated.

I hope the OP gets my post in the spirit it is intended.

[eldog]

Life is an amazing gift -


Often I would like to give my gift to someone else.
But it appears to have a 1 owner policy.

I don't know what it feels like to lose a limb (etc) or suffer a loss of a very close partner/friend/relative.

I had to make a big set of decisions recently.
Sell or fix up house - decided to fix it up slowly - approx. 30% done
strangely all the changes have gone smoothly even though it should have taken 1 month it has taken 4+
Expected work to continue with some changes.

Work has now changed and different opportunities have arisen.


Have been down south and kept an eye out for opportunities, not much happening.
I have to make a decision for the future.

keep with current situation and a new boss
or move and do something totally different as a job.

looks like I have a few more things to sort.

[Crasherfromwayback]

Make the change Bro.
.

This Cat.....

[old slider]

To the OP,

I can empathise with anyone questioning why they bother going on with a daily struggle but feeling trapped due to commitments.

One thing I learned is that there is only one constant in life, and that is change. It can be sort of comfortable to stick with a situation despite not being happy with it. However the result of that is stress, if you feel it is out of your control and what you do want to make you happy today is also out of your control.

Here is the thing, nothing is directly under our own control. So I made a concious decision not to try and "control" or minutely preplan my life or that of anyone else I come into contact with. I wake up each morning expecting the unexpected, and embracing what the day brings no matter what.

Don't get me wrong I still have goals and etc, but I leave that to my subconcious mind to make decisions and choices that will lead me there over time. I just don't get all twisted about not having what I want now, or the job I want now, or the freedom and money I wat NOW, NOW NOW......

After my Wife died I only made one decision,....just be open to change, open to anything that comes my way, good or bad as I probably had not control over it. However one big thing makes me confident in the future, and that is being open to change allows you to have a mindset open to taking BIG opportunities when they present themselves rather than holding back because you are comfortable or feeling trapped. Grab opportunities with both hands and wring them for all they are worth. Bad times and bad experiences are opportunities for change, you just have to be open to taking advantage,

As for the Wife, ask her whether she would rather live with you feeling depressed and anxious, or confident and adaptable. Which do you think is going to be better for you, her and your relationship. Even if no change, at least the conversation has been had.......which helps form a shared understanding of being open to grabbing opportunities instead of feeling helpless and trapped.

I have never felt so in control of my life, career, recreational riding, finances,....as when I gave up feeling like I had to stay the stable course. I have a freehold house (sold up the big one and bought smaller cheaper), two debt free bikes (bought older with cash rather than HP newer), on old crappy hiace van, always play money in the bank rather than credit cards and loans, I am now management (shifted from Auckland Council to a Lower North Island Council) but workers don't feel I micromanage them, so win win all around.

Make the change Bro.

To achieve something you have never achieved before, you have to do something you have never done before.


Nice post and you definitely made a great move coming to this part of the world. Living around here gives so much more than just a fresh breath of air each morning.

To Skippa, mate I admire your honesty and your obvious strength to get this far, being in constant pain and working around your lost limb is a lot to deal with.

I can not imagine losing a limb, but can relate to being in pain, pain can be so debilitating and I often wish for just one day pain free. losing the use of some important joints that make our so called normal life difficult is at times both frustrating and stressful if I let it.

Thankfully I had Kyokushin in my life, this helped develop over the years a stronger never give up attitude, I push myself to do as much of and as many of the things that I have enjoyed in life, I can and still do as often as possible hunt deer and fish, but I changed some of the types of terrain I hobble about in.
I can still do the 2 or 3 hour walks into the bush, it just takes me an hour or so longer. lol. I continue to train (in my own way) at the dojo in my 60s, I used to feel self conscious with my lack of ability with movement and loss of balance, but younger more abled persons have said they use me as their inspiration, it makes me feel better, and I reckon your an inspiration to many of us on here. Keep being an inspiration mate, that maybe your calling.

[jasonu]

I would love to be one of those guys that is happy just pottering around in the garden growing my own veges and stuff but I would get bored out of my tiny mind inside a week.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PVQIxK_R3kI

[skippa1]

I can empathise a little with your situation. After my accident in '97 despite the loss of use of my arm and never-ending excruciating pain I was steadfast in my opinion that I should live a 'normal' life still. Took me 16 years to realise that that's not entirely possible. Dealing with all the stresses of work etc plus coping with my situation and believing I needed to live up to my high expectations of myself was slowly doing me in. About 3 years ago I decided I couldn't keep doing that to myself.

It's not been easy. My income has dropped significantly but I have enough to get by and enjoy life. Not working and feeling like I'm contributing and achieving has been hard to adjust to. Not having the social aspect of work is another thing. But my life is ten fold better now. I now have time to deal with the pain, I can take time out when I need to just let the pain do its thing rather than having to dedicate 100% of my concentration to just stand up let alone listen to a customer. I no longer have to convince myself through lies that everything is alright. I can now accept that it's not, and I can do that without having to worry about deadlines etc.

I don't know what will happen next in my life, but I'm comfortable with that.
Cheers, good thoughts. I am going to try and avoid that 16 years at all costs. Watch this space

[skippa1]

Nice post and you definitely made a great move coming to this part of the world. Living around here gives so much more than just a fresh breath of air each morning.

To Skippa, mate I admire your honesty and your obvious strength to get this far, being in constant pain and working around your lost limb is a lot to deal with.
Keep being an inspiration mate, that maybe your calling.
Cheers man, not so much pain though sometimes the phantoms are interesting.

you may be closer to the truth re my calling than you realise though to

[skippa1]

This Cat.....
Chur, could be on the money

[skippa1]

rbgiafp .
Chur ma chur

[skippa1]

To the OP,

I can empathise with anyone questioning why they bother going on with a daily struggle but feeling trapped due to commitments.

One thing I learned is that there is only one constant in life, and that is change. It can be sort of comfortable to stick with a situation despite not being happy with it. However the result of that is stress, if you feel it is out of your control and what you do want to make you happy today is also out of your control.

Here is the thing, nothing is directly under our own control. So I made a concious decision not to try and "control" or minutely preplan my life or that of anyone else I come into contact with. I wake up each morning expecting the unexpected, and embracing what the day brings no matter what.

Don't get me wrong I still have goals and etc, but I leave that to my subconcious mind to make decisions and choices that will lead me there over time. I just don't get all twisted about not having what I want now, or the job I want now, or the freedom and money I wat NOW, NOW NOW......

After my Wife died I only made one decision,....just be open to change, open to anything that comes my way, good or bad as I probably had not control over it. However one big thing makes me confident in the future, and that is being open to change allows you to have a mindset open to taking BIG opportunities when they present themselves rather than holding back because you are comfortable or feeling trapped. Grab opportunities with both hands and wring them for all they are worth. Bad times and bad experiences are opportunities for change, you just have to be open to taking advantage,

As for the Wife, ask her whether she would rather live with you feeling depressed and anxious, or confident and adaptable. Which do you think is going to be better for you, her and your relationship. Even if no change, at least the conversation has been had.......which helps form a shared understanding of being open to grabbing opportunities instead of feeling helpless and trapped.

I have never felt so in control of my life, career, recreational riding, finances,....as when I gave up feeling like I had to stay the stable course. I have a freehold house (sold up the big one and bought smaller cheaper), two debt free bikes (bought older with cash rather than HP newer), on old crappy hiace van, always play money in the bank rather than credit cards and loans, I am now management (shifted from Auckland Council to a Lower North Island Council) but workers don't feel I micromanage them, so win win all around.

Make the change Bro.

To achieve something you have never achieved before, you have to do something you have never done before.
Some true word there......watch this space

[skippa1]

i'm fucken baws.

your human experience is a one way thing, why waste it playing the jewgame™
You must spread more.....yak yak yak

[skippa1]

Had similar cause to reflect earlier this week when the woman I work with had a seizure at work which has been shown to be due to a brain tumour. It is benign so she will return to work but she cannot drive for a year now which at age 69 leaves her at the good graces of others to transport her around and she does go out quite a bit. Make time to enjoy stuff while you still can. I was pretty determined that I was going to work until I am 68 but just reviewing that now.
Same sort of awakening, just the mechanics to sort

[skippa1]

I didn't want to be still working at 70 but there is always the temptation to work just a little longer, to pay for one more thing for the house or whatever. I managed to retire at 69. There is still stuff needs doing to the house but... One woman I worked with died suddenly and I thought bugger working all your life. My income is modest enough but I can still run the bike and afford the odd toy - fingers crossed.

Skippa your situation is different but I wish you well.
Cheers man, as Akz states, its a one way trip, make the best of it

[Akzle]

you ever see yourself on a 'sicle again?

could be a closed chapter (never say never) but also could be worth doing again...

[skippa1]

Im a little in the same boat apart from the losing the leg thing and we pretty much own the house now. But I dont want to be doing the same thing in 10 years time. Being 50 this year Ive decided to go back to study and upskill. Be the guy handing the shit down not the guy doing the shit.

Any chance to upskill?
I am the guy handing the shit down, I was the guy doing the shit.

handing the shit down isnt all peachy like I thought, the challenge has been interesting for 8 years but I am now in the second layer of shit hander downers in a large company(1800 staff) one layer down from the MD. i have over 100 staff and responsibility for $25m in revenue.........the pressure at this level of handing down is intense and whilst the rewards are pretty good, the expectations and tolerance for less than 100% performance of all of your staff is nil. You carry the can, the buck stops with you.....doing is better than dishing the doing

Re training is an option though too

[Akzle]

About 3 years ago I decided I couldn't keep doing that to myself.

"Akzle
needs trainer wheels on his bike


♂
Join Date:
6th May 2012"


... just sayin.

[oldiebutagoody]

Nice post and you definitely made a great move coming to this part of the world. Living around here gives so much more than just a fresh breath of air each morning.



Must meet up for a ride sometime.

[Akzle]

.

you may be closer to the truth re my calling than you realise though to




Re training is an option though too

do it for the kids


http://hopscotchforkids.co.nz/

[AllanB]

Back at work tomorrow as well after three weeks off. First week was trying not to fall asleep in the middle of the day. You know you go from a year of work deadlines and stress busy busy to ...... nothing! Takes it's toll.


Must work on work-life balance in 2017.


Must find a clean shirt to iron tonight as well :nya:

[oldiebutagoody]

Must find a clean shirt to iron tonight as well :nya:

You iron your shirts?????

[Akzle]

Must find a clean shirt to iron tonight as well :nya:

what is this "shirt" you speak of??? is that something poor people have to do?

[AllanB]

what is this "shirt" you speak of??? is that something poor people have to do?

What classy buggers wear to work. I draw the line at a tie ...... unless I need to be in court. Judges like ties.


Casual Friday is appreciated more after ironing shirts Monday - Thursday.

[Akzle]

What classy buggers wear to work. I draw the line at a tie ...... unless I need to be in court. Judges like ties.


Casual Friday is appreciated more after ironing shirts Monday - Thursday.

poor indeed.
also, my time is worth more than "judges", so i don't bother going to them without payment aforehand.

[awayatc]

Had huge rethink as well.....
Boat I was on lost contract....
To young (poor) to do nothing
To old (unmotivated) to learn new tricks.....

Compromise: took new job for couple or 3 trip 5 week trips..... take rest of year of.
Do different job on different type ship..... may come in handy ?

Am happy with outcome. ..

[Zedder]

Cheers man, not so much pain though sometimes the phantoms are interesting.




I read an article recently on mirror therapy for phantoms limbs. Apparently, the mirror fools the brain into thinking the limb still exists which then reduces symptoms. Have you come across this?

[skippa1]

I read an article recently on mirror therapy for phantoms limbs. Apparently, the mirror fools the brain into thinking the limb still exists which then reduces symptoms. Have you come across this?
Yep, tried it. A real mind fuck to be honest. I dont get pain but my foot feels twisted like it was in the accident sometimes like really bad pins and needles and i sometimes feel like its hot or cold, calf and knee sometimes feel like they are wet or the wind is blowing on them. Hard to explain but not really painful.
mirroe therapy is meant to work well if you get really bad pain.