Do you service your own shit?

[Akzle]

As title/poll.

Just curious.

[george formby]

Since we had a problem with our sewer pipe I've had to polish my turds. Well, a gentle buffing, so they are more streamlined. The G/F refuses to climb back in if it blocks again. Does that count?

[AllanB]

I had a colonoscopy on Friday.

A fair bit of shit getting ready for that procedure ....

If anyone is interested the specialist provided me with a set of colour photos of the inside of my bowel.

I was most disappointed that he did not actually find a small sun up there.

[Virago]

I just flush mine. Someone else's problem - that's what I pay rates for.

Mind you, I did have an enema once - does that count?

[bogan]

I go with a courtesy scrub if there is heavy skid marking, just chuck some TP in if it is only light; plus closing the lid in both cases. I reckon that's not bad service.


Since we had a problem with our sewer pipe I've had to polish my turds. Well, a gentle buffing, so they are more streamlined. The G/F refuses to climb back in if it blocks again. Does that count?

Nothing wrong with a bit of light pegging bro.

[Akzle]

Since we had a problem with our sewer pipe I've had to polish my turds. Well, a gentle buffing, so they are more streamlined. The G/F refuses to climb back in if it blocks again. Does that count?

guinness and mince pies. hakuna matata

[Delerium]

As title/poll.

Just curious.

Are you talking about a bike or something else 'nudge nudge'

[george formby]

guinness and mince pies. hakuna matata

Fuck Axolotl, your a light weight. Guinness absolutely, any indecent stout for that matter. But the mince pie has to be curried, re-heated the night before, left in the microwave and eaten for breakfast. Seeing as it's stout and last nights curried mince pie from the chipper for brekkie, just before lunch time or you weren't really trying to enrich the brewers empire, then a side of over cooked brussel sprouts is mandatory, obligatory if you have stubborn G/F and poo shute issues.
Therein lies a happy maintenance schedule with minimal buffing. If it's an authentic Bengali mince pie then the occasional cardamom pod may need the edges buffed. A scholl foot scraper is perfect for this. My G/F has one.

I started off a bit harsh, sorry, your on the right track but I live in fear and can get a bit emotional. Keep up the good work and I commend your grasp of Swahili.

[HenryDorsetCase]

I had an enormous and very satisfying one this morning, with the latest copy of Performance Bikes in hand.

lovely consistency, hardly any splatter, easy clean.

So I'm going with yes.

[george formby]

I had an enormous and very satisfying one this morning, with the latest copy of Performance Bikes in hand.

lovely consistency, hardly any splatter, easy clean.

So I'm going with yes.

The perfect oil and filter change. Well done Sir, a sparkling sump and polished sump plug no doubt.

[Voltaire]

gewz and shit.

[Moise]

I had an enormous and very satisfying one this morning, with the latest copy of Performance Bikes in hand.

lovely consistency, hardly any splatter, easy clean.

So I'm going with yes.
Yeah, it always seem better reading a bike mag.

Sent from somewhere using Tapatalk

[Honest Andy]

this should probably be moved to "exhaust systems"...

[Akzle]

i've been topping up my fluid with export dry. still smoking a bit. not out the back end, mind.

[Akzle]

Fuck Axolotl, your a light weight. Guinness absolutely, any indecent stout for that matter. But the mince pie has to be curried, re-heated the night before, left in the microwave and eaten for breakfast. Seeing as it's stout and last nights curried mince pie from the chipper for brekkie, just before lunch time or you weren't really trying to enrich the brewers empire, then a side of over cooked brussel sprouts is mandatory, obligatory if you have stubborn G/F and poo shute issues.
Therein lies a happy maintenance schedule with minimal buffing. If it's an authentic Bengali mince pie then the occasional cardamom pod may need the edges buffed. A scholl foot scraper is perfect for this. My G/F has one.

I started off a bit harsh, sorry, your on the right track but I live in fear and can get a bit emotional. Keep up the good work and I commend your grasp of Swahili.

tl:dr.

lager is the only thing that can neutralise a curry...


ps. i'm an alcoholic and wiould outdrink you like a fucken schoolgirl.

[Akzle]

I just flush mine. Someone else's problem - that's what I pay rates for.

Mind you, I did have an enema once - does that count?

once is clearly not enough. you're still ful of shit.. :bleh:

[Akzle]

Are you talking about a bike or something else 'nudge nudge'

i left it with freud. kb answered.

[Akzle]

it's funny. right now the poll is 1, 2... 5.

garwain.

[Banditbandit]

But seriously - I spent most of the 70s and some of the 80s keeping bikes running so I could get to work.

Now I love riding it into the shop - say "Fix it - I'll pick it up after work' - absolute luxury

[trufflebutter]

Do you service your own shit? I can't even bring myself to look at my own shit let alone service it.

[TheDemonLord]

Now I love riding it into the shop - say "Fix it - I'll pick it up after work' - absolute luxury

Amen.

I don't mind working on my own bike - but....

[Doppleganger]

Just flush and a scrub from me, no need to linger.

[Jeff Sichoe]

Filters and basic shit only for me, I would like to know more but everytime I get my fingers in there something breaks or gets somehow fucked up or lost so i've sorta learnt my lesson

[cods4]

Started doing more and more in-depth shit. Did my first valve adjustment/timing chain replacement job last year on my POS ZXR250 and it went well. Now I am doing my first top end rebuild on my KTM. So far so good, scariest thing is going to be getting the piston back in and torquing the head bolts.

[EJK]

Now I love riding it into the shop - say "Fix it - I'll pick it up after work' - absolute luxury

<img src="https://media.giphy.com/media/jJIi9SQEhkkSI/giphy.gif" />

[Banditbandit]

<img src="https://media.giphy.com/media/jJIi9SQEhkkSI/giphy.gif" />



yeah - I can afford it now ...

[Akzle]

KTM. So far so good, scariest thing is going to be getting the piston back in and torquing the head bolts.

i don't understand the question. just make sure you buy a box of cans (bonus points for lion brown) for the job, bottles are useless as ring compressors.

[Oakie]

I had a colonoscopy on Friday. ... I was most disappointed that he did not actually find a small sun up there.

Perhaps an ass-teroid?

[Zedder]

Perhaps an ass-teroid?


It's not ur-anus silly.

[Virago]

Perhaps an ass-teroid?

More of a black hole.

[george formby]

l


ps. i'm an alcoholic and wiould outdrink you like a fucken schoolgirl.

It wouldn't be the first time I've been out drunk by an alcoholic school girl but I doubt my ending would be as happy. Or pert.

[mossy1200]

I just had first service done. Over a hundy per hr plus 15 for rags. Idd rather they had collected the old oil in a tray than use $15 worth of rags to clean it off the workshop floor.

[Zedder]

More of a black hole.


I realise the gravity of the situation.

[Oakie]

I just had first service done. Over a hundy per hr plus 15 for rags. Idd rather they had collected the old oil in a tray than use $15 worth of rags to clean it off the workshop floor.

Well you should have taken it to a bike mechanic then, not a doctor. Charged for rags ... seriously!?

[Virago]

I realise the gravity of the situation.

Although the problem is only a singularity.

[Ocean1]

Do you service your own shit? I can't even bring myself to look at my own shit let alone service it.

How do you know your worms is healthy?

[skippa1]

ps. i'm an alcoholic and wiould outdrink you like a fucken schoolgirl.
I will take up that challenge, and win

[Moi]

How do you know your worms is healthy?

Do you have German ancestry?

[Zedder]

Although the problem is only a singularity.


It's best not to get sucked in by that though.

[Akzle]

I will take up that challenge, and win

pah! game. fkn. on.

[Ocean1]

Do you have German ancestry?

A long way back.

Nowt to do with Jörmungandr, though.

[jonbuoy]

Fuck working on anything modern, not because of electronics - its all the plastic and the fact everythings crammed in with hardly any access.

[skippa1]

pah! game. fkn. on.
Bring it on....400ml of vodka so far

[Akzle]

Bring it on....400ml of vodka so far

pussy shit. i'll bring you some of my moonshine one day :laugh:
that shit will take the legs out from underneath ya...

[TheDemonLord]

pussy shit. i'll bring you some of my moonshine one day :laugh:
that shit will take the legs out from underneath ya...

Is that what you say to your favourite Goat?

[Moi]

A long way back.

Nowt to do with Jörmungandr, though.

I was thinking of Flachspüler

[Honest Andy]

we need to be a bit careful what we say here...
I think akzle might be lining somebody up to fix his new gn250...

[caspernz]

we need to be a bit careful what we say here...
I think akzle might be lining somebody up to fix his new gn250...

Nah it be all good, even once he's got the GN going, Azkill is gonna have to find his pants first :devil2:

[Ocean1]

I was thinking of Flachspüler

Right. I do remember those. :laugh:

Not necessarily the most unusual arrangement in the world, though...

[trufflebutter]

How do you know your worms is healthy?

The more chocolate I eat the happier they seems.

[Akzle]

Nah it be all good, even once he's got the GN going, Azkill is gonna have to find his pants first :devil2:

who needs pants?? woofter..

[caspernz]

who needs pants?? woofter..

Having owned a mighty GN, the wearing of pants is advantageous to not burning ones' mansack, or maybe mine hangs lower than yours :headbang:

[skippa1]

who needs pants?? woofter..
Pants are for fags with small cocks

[Akzle]

Pants are for fags with small cocks

is the singular far "pants" just "pant"? :bleh:

[Akzle]

Having owned a mighty GN, the wearing of pants is advantageous to not burning ones' mansack, or maybe mine hangs lower than yours :headbang:

i think your doing something wrong :rolleyes:

[mossy1200]

Well you should have taken it to a bike mechanic then, not a doctor. Charged for rags ... seriously!?

Workshop Consumables. Must be rags.

[Ocean1]

Workshop Consumables. Must be rags.

I'm surprised there's not a safety compliance charge.

If, in fact it's even possible to do any sort of work at all in a workshop anywhere near "compliant".

[R650R]

If, in fact it's even possible to do any sort of work at all in a workshop anywhere near "compliant".

You can do the dumbest most dangerous shit you want in any workplace... as long as you acknowledge ist dangerous and 'manage' the risk.
During a recent training session with third party safety contractor I raised an issue where he said at no time do you ever do X with Machine X... His reply was oh yes I'm well aware of what happens at X in those circumstances and that is whats known as a managed risk....

[Akzle]

Workshop Consumables. Must be rags.

but rags are re-usable.
just put em through the washing machine when your mitti does whites and delicates....

[mossy1200]

but rags are re-usable.
just put em through the washing machine when your mitti does whites and delicates....

Then I must have paid for a dozen beers for them to consume after work.

[Akzle]

Then I must have paid for a dozen beers for them to consume after work.

what beers are 15$/doz?? :scratch:

[caspernz]

i think your doing something wrong :rolleyes:

Ah ok, so owning a bike and wearing pants is where I went off track? :laugh::eek::bleh::facepalm::innocent::blink::shut up:

[TheDemonLord]

You can do the dumbest most dangerous shit you want in any workplace... as long as you acknowledge ist dangerous and 'manage' the risk.
During a recent training session with third party safety contractor I raised an issue where he said at no time do you ever do X with Machine X... His reply was oh yes I'm well aware of what happens at X in those circumstances and that is whats known as a managed risk....

At a company I might work at, there is a massive risk currently - but it's okay, it's on the risk register....

I nearly flipped my wig when I found out....

[caspernz]

You can do the dumbest most dangerous shit you want in any workplace... as long as you acknowledge ist dangerous and 'manage' the risk.
During a recent training session with third party safety contractor I raised an issue where he said at no time do you ever do X with Machine X... His reply was oh yes I'm well aware of what happens at X in those circumstances and that is whats known as a managed risk....

Haha, there's another angle on this in terms of frequency of events, or lack of reported near misses which would lead to such an event. Also known as burying ones head in the sand on a topic which would adversely affect profitability should the risk need to be managed.

[Jeff Sichoe]

I would suggest a course in mechatronics for anyone who can identify a risk and wants to keep their job once the automatic workforce signs in

[mossy1200]

what beers are 15$/doz?? :scratch:

I like almaza and thats $12 a dozen at the moment.

[Coldrider]

I would suggest a course in mechatronics for anyone who can identify a risk and wants to keep their job once the automatic workforce signs in
Already in that line myself, but is still cheaper to employ idiots than purchase robotics and automation. In fact employed idiots actually fuck up robotics, so idiots will reign, right down to the lowest common denominator, taking all with them.

[Voltaire]

I would suggest a course in mechatronics for anyone who can identify a risk and wants to keep their job once the automatic workforce signs in

Will robots need ACC cover?

R2D2 " I picked up some gravel in my roller and its been squeaking"

Doctor " go to Supercheap and get some CRC"

[R650R]

Haha, there's another angle on this in terms of frequency of events, or lack of reported near misses which would lead to such an event. Also known as burying ones head in the sand on a topic which would adversely affect profitability should the risk need to be managed.

We've implented a new system which makes it easier to report near misses/incidents/concerns.... the number of reports has increased massively but actual real accidents have decreased at same time. So (internal)enforcement action and higher threat of being reported for doing dumb shit has made people think more about what they are doing and stick to proper ways of doing job.
Sadly a lot of people call it BS still, even the sub contractor I nearly ran over (when he did dumb shit) but at the end of the day where i work, work is getting safer. And safer equals less lost time which equals less losses and better pay/bonuses for all....

[R650R]

I would suggest a course in mechatronics for anyone who can identify a risk and wants to keep their job once the automatic workforce signs in

Automated systems will still break down and also need servicing. Have looked at some of our stuff we do and theres too much variation in the products handled for a robot to do it efficiently. A robot will always have set parameters but a human can see a problem and gauge from experience if they can manipulate their machine in an unorthodox manner to continue loading/shifting product.
Also for one of our customers its a three year contract at a time. You cant justify the massive expense (currently) for an automated system that you might not own long enough to earn its keep...
Skilled Human labour is still quite cheap....

[Ocean1]

Skilled Human labour is still quite cheap....

Not around my neck of the woods it's not...

[AllanB]

Still under warranty so dealer plays with it.

I pull my wheels for tyres.

Post warranty I'll do oil/filters and the dealer can do major services.

Then again people like a 'shop' service record for bikes, particularly European ones. Decide that one later.

[Voltaire]

Still under warranty so dealer plays with it.

I pull my wheels for tyres.

Post warranty I'll do oil/filters and the dealer can do major services.

Then again people like a 'shop' service record for bikes, particularly European ones. Decide that one later.

I wonder if some shop receipts give all the details like:

Oil-4 litres- $50
Filter- $30
Time spent on Kiwi Biker-2 hours

Total - $500