Fuckin child support

[Quasievil]

FUCKEN ARSEHOLES IRD MOTHER FUCKERS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i know have to pay the creature from the deep the suckulous ugly munt of a woman a figure which is even more fucken ridiculous.

IM SO FUCKEN ANGRY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

just got my next years notice


CUNTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[WRT]

A healthy reminder for us all - cool kids wear lids - both on the streets and in the sheets.

Stay safe out there, kiddos.

[madboy]

Self-employed? Income split with the current missus? Write off lots of household expenses against your business income? It's only tax evasion if you get caught (and you probably won't - most self-employed don't). Unless you're a normal salary/wage earner in which case you might as well invest in lube.

I got my latest one the other day - my ex has to pay me $60 a month. Wahoo!!! That goes such a long way toward the cost of bringing up my daughter.

[NotaGoth]

remind me to get my ovaries ripped out before my want for babies gets any worse :mellow:

[crashe]

and............. your point is....



Quasi... you have to pay the $$$$ for your kids....
Thats life...

You bring kids into this world.... with any breakup... if there are kids ...
someone has to pay......

I know its tough.... but thats life mate....

If its too much... go and get a review done...
You do have time to object to the amount...


Now if only they could find my daughter's father and make him backpay all the dosh that he owes to IRD...

[Patrick]

Now tell us how you really feel...

Ya still stuck her ugly munt with it... time to pay $$$ for hiding the sausage "without protection"

[SpankMe]

This is why I will NEVER spawn.

Has she got a job? If so why should you pay anything. If she decided to take custody, then she should take full financial responsibility.

[onearmedbandit]

I hears ya!

[bugjuice]

this is where I consider myself like a sniper (no, not you Sniper) - no women, no kids.
oh, and I'm pretty sharp most of the time too

[ManDownUnder]

Quasi - good rant mate. Get it off your chest, have a beer or 10 and see how it looks next week.

I'd love to help and I'm sure there are tips and tricks to do so. Tax specialists would be a good start if you wanted to.

Give it time though - wait till you stop seeing red so you have a more balanced point of view - assuming there is one to be had.


This is why I will NEVER spawn.
Hey Spank - you'll never know the rewards either. Your choice though... I have no argument with that.

MDU out

[Patrick]

This is why I will NEVER spawn.

Has she got a job? If so why should you pay anything. If she decided to take custody, then she should take full financial responsibility.

Why? It's his kid too...went halves making it, gotta go halves keeping it...

[enigma51]

Quasi have a few looks at spankme's avatar its like a clock it calms you down and gives you hope!!!! Hang in there mate the tax man shall always rip your balls off as well as ex wives!!!!

[MSTRS]

Been there etc. T'were near on 20 year ago but the scars still itch at times. They still base the figure as a % of earnings from 2yrs ago, don't they. You can get a variance if you can tick enough of the hardship boxes tho. Go for it - can't be worse off.

[madboy]

remind me to get my ovaries ripped out before my want for babies gets any worse :mellow:You spoken to Poos lately?

[sAsLEX]

Why? It's his kid too...went halves making it, gotta go halves keeping it...

So if he kept it would the law go back the other way in full fairness? Did he choose not to keep his child? well i dont know but how often do you see fathers winning custody battles? Not often as the laws and their applications in this country seem to back the female

[Patrick]

So if he kept it would the law go back the other way in full fairness? Did he choose not to keep his child? well i dont know but how often do you see fathers winning custody battles? Not often as the laws and their applications in this country seem to back the female


True. Dunno if he chose to keep or not to keep, but it would be the other way around if he kept, then she would be paying.

[Grahameeboy]

Sorry matey but ya need to think about the Kids and not you in these situations......you had kids so you cannot deny them now.

Sorry....

[Grahameeboy]

So if he kept it would the law go back the other way in full fairness? Did he choose not to keep his child? well i dont know but how often do you see fathers winning custody battles? Not often as the laws and their applications in this country seem to back the female

Actually....since 2004 things have changed and when a couple seperate you get automatic equal shared custody without having to go to Court....obviously if there is domestic violence etc then the Family Court decide.

Wash your bike you dirty whore!!!!!

[Quasievil]

and............. your point is....



Quasi... you have to pay the $$$$ for your kids....
Thats life...

You bring kids into this world.... with any breakup... if there are kids ...
someone has to pay......

I know its tough.... but thats life mate....

If its too much... go and get a review done...
You do have time to object to the amount...


Now if only they could find my daughter's father and make him backpay all the dosh that he owes to IRD...

Tread Carefully Im liable to explode anytime.

yes your right i do bring Kids into this world and he is my world, I would fight to pay for his up keep, you better believe it, unfortunetly people do break up, nothing like a knife implanted in oneself to encourage that eh ?
Yes someone does have to pay someONE and that one has to pay alot.

I pay $750, I dont mind saying that, yes im on a good income so what good for me !
How do you consider that a child cost this much.... lets break it down

1/ Food one child eating really really well 80.00 a week ?
2/ Clothes a item each week $50 a week
3/ School requirements $20 a week ?
4/ child Health insurance $10 a week

Total $550 and thats one spoilt little kid (I dont cost that much)

So I pay $750 how is that figured out ? should it not be 50/50 thereby making a $1500 cost?

Where is her contribution ?

Why is her income not assesed ? its alot more than mine

Why is the fact that I have him every other weekend not considered ?

Why is the fact I have him for holidays not considered ?

Why am I
1/ penalised by not being able to share custody (cause Im a man?)
2 further penalised by paying a HUGE financal levy each month

THIS IS WRONG, its a complete fuckin jack up by lefty motherfuckers !!
I have ZERO respect for any mother that SUCKS an amount of money from a ex like this.

Hey and I know guys paying $1500 a month HOWS THAT ????

yes boys marry wisely and dont have kids the IRD will tax you for it

ADMIN review, that is a JOKE, your ex gets all your financla details then you sit with a fucken hairy armed pitted lefty tree hugging sandal wearing braless bitch that takes delight watching you quiver in your seat for the crime of being a MAN.

Family Court ? read above

Been there done that !!

in about two days I will be back to normal calm and collected once I get over the IRD inserting their RODS OF CORRUPT AUTHORITY UP MY ARSE !!!!

[Korumba]

In the same boat here...wouldnt worry about the amount, if it all went to the kids.

[bugjuice]

fooooook me.. that's a lotta mula to dish out every month..

Thing is, if you had custody, would she have to pay that to you?
*adds fuel*

[Quasievil]

So if he kept it would the law go back the other way in full fairness? Did he choose not to keep his child? well i dont know but how often do you see fathers winning custody battles? Not often as the laws and their applications in this country seem to back the female

tried custody, Im a man....... screwed by default

[Quasievil]

Sorry matey but ya need to think about the Kids and not you in these situations......you had kids so you cannot deny them now.

Sorry....

Whos fucken denying them ?
Ok lets think about the child in our care and the disproportionate amount we spend on the child not in our care.
Lets think about the impact on our family?
lets think about the $200K + income and my $750 for the other family and the lifestyle variations ?

[enigma51]

Quasi I want to be your kid I also want 1500 a month to spend on myself!!!!!

This is the problem with left wing fucking social tree huging fuckwits (now you have me angry as well) that make decisions for others.My wife and I is sitting with the same (not realy the same but still ) bullshit from imigrations. A not born in nz person is making a desicion on if my wife (diabetic) can stay in the country her tax a year is more than the average income but still she will be a burden on the nz goverment YEAH FUCKEN RIGHT she's going to go on the doll. O yes what are we talking about again?

[sAsLEX]

O yes what are we talking about again?

Labour basically

[enigma51]

Labour basically

so true :angry2: but yet so funny :yes:

[magicfairy]

We are not all evil (ex wives) I think the child support system is really unfair, so I came to a private arrangement with my ex to pay me $50 a week - not the $100 ++ tax dept was going to take off him.

[Grahameeboy]

Whos fucken denying them ?
Ok lets think about the child in our care and the disproportionate amount we spend on the child not in our care.
Lets think about the impact on our family?
lets think about the $200K + income and my $750 for the other family and the lifestyle variations ?

Sorry, you didn't give much detail when you started which your more recent thread does do and I agree that you should only pay a % for Kids care if ex has a job etc....the difference may cover 'Living Standards'.....

But if you earn $200k a year........not all of us come close to that so I guess you have greater means than 90% of population.

Can you not use the Family Court to set up a new parenting agreement. This way you would be able to reduce your payments to ex...so you would feel better and you would have your kids half the week....assuming you want that.

I am in the same boat plus more complex issues.

[MSTRS]

Quasi - I feel your pain. I had ALL the same questions etc back in 1985-1990. My x was on DPB and I dare say got more than I, then a chunk of mine was surgically removed at source with no credit for regular & extended access. Nothing's changed. And yes, Labour was it when it started for me too.

[Grahameeboy]

We are not all evil (ex wives) I think the child support system is really unfair, so I came to a private arrangement with my ex to pay me $50 a week - not the $100 ++ tax dept was going to take off him.

I agree....my ex is not evil......the Law has changed a bit since 2004 I think and I guess the main issue for some guys is that their custody is out of proportion to the support they pay....as I said before since 2004 the custody Law has changed so I guess this impacts of what child benefit is paid..........

[Grahameeboy]

Quasi - I feel your pain. I had ALL the same questions etc back in 1985-1990. My x was on DPB and I dare say got more than I, then a chunk was surgically removed at source with no credit for regular & extanded access. Nothing's changed. And yes, Labour was it when it started for me too.

Things have changed since 2004 with regard to Custody....

[MSTRS]

Things have changed since 2004 with regard to Custody....
Perhaps they have....but it would seem the maintenance side of things is still heavily weighted against the father. Your choice in this situation always was get raped by the State or fight it & get raped by the lawyers, with no guarantee of avoiding another rogering by the aforementioned State.

[Grahameeboy]

Perhaps they have....but it would seem the maintenance side of things is still heavily weighted against the father. Your choice in this situation always was get raped by the State or fight it & get raped by the lawyers, with no guarantee of avoiding another rogering by the aforementioned State.

I guess with it being less of a fight to get equal shared custody that this reduces the Child Support so at least that evens things up.

I guess also that even in this day, Men are often the greater or only wage earner so this is why things are weighted against Father..........just circumstances.

In my case, my ex earns a lot more than me. I did not leave, I have a disabled Daughter and it wll cost me and my family about $350,000 to keep the house which has ramps etc and is an asset for Natalie's future.....I get equal shared custody and there is no Child Support arrangement and I struggle sometimes but I do have the support of my family and I have my Daughter half the week so it is well worth it......I am not complaining.

Remember a lot of Fathers do not want much custody.

[Rashika]

But if you earn $200k a year........not all of us come close to that so I guess you have greater means than 90% of population.

umm try the amount being 60k a year (nothing like 200k) to be paying $850 month to IRD for one child, and that is AFTER having the amount reduced because you have a partner as well...
I can relate a little Quasi, as a partner (now ex) of someone in the same boat as you... it is damn hard to find that amount a month on 2 incomes, let alone on one. I seriously wonder how he manages it now...poor bloke.
And ditto on the same visits, and on the mother earning a fairly moderate amount as well...seems like none of that shit gets taken into the equation at all.


Yes kids are important BUT you'd think thay could make the system fairer than it is, why should you guys who do pay be penalised for the fktards who dont? :headbang:

[MSTRS]

In my case, my ex earns a lot more than me. ....I get equal shared custody and there is no Child Support arrangement and I struggle sometimes......
Surely in any case where custody is equally shared and both parents have jobs then they are both assessed on their incomes & the one with the higher amount pays the difference to the one with the lower amount. That is how I understand things work now.
Edit - unless a benefit is involved or there is a claim made, then no payment may be the order of the day. Voluntary assistance with actual expenses would be ideal??

[Quasievil]

But if you earn $200k a year........not all of us come close to that so I guess you have greater means than 90% of population.



I dont earn 200K a year she would be about that, Im less then half that mate.
Im settling down now, I wrote a letter to a labour MP as per every year !
never does anything, mind you I called him Pro-Fem-Nazi supporter this time which makes it better than last year

[Grahameeboy]

umm try the amount being 60k a year (nothing like 200k) to be paying $850 month to IRD for one child, and that is AFTER having the amount reduced because you have a partner as well...
I can relate a little Quasi, as a partner (now ex) of someone in the same boat as you... it is damn hard to find that amount a month on 2 incomes, let alone on one.
And ditto on the same visits, and on the mother earning a fairly moderate amount as well...seems like none of that shit gets taken into the equation at all.


Yes kids are important BUT you'd think thay could make the system fairer than it is, why should you guys who do pay be penalised for the fktards who dont? :headbang:

I agree with you....it is hard even if you earn good money but it is also easier than the situation you mention.

I agree that the system is not fair although as I said before the new custody laws must alter things a little.

In the UK they have the same problems which is set up to get those guys who do a runner but in fact penalises the guys who don't.......but it has to be said that the Mother's do not help either.....my friend had an arrangment, Mother lost her job, she goes to CPS and he ends up paying heaps more, does not see his kid and you can forget about means testing...a lot of guys go on dole because it is cheaper and some have commited suicide

[Grahameeboy]

I dont earn 200K a year she would be about that, Im less then half that mate.
Im settling down now, I wrote a letter to a labour MP as per every year !
never does anything, mind you I called him Pro-Fem-Nazi supporter this time which makes it better than last year

Oh bugger, I am not looking good when that was not my intention.....so she earns $200k.....wrong.....but things have changed so might be worth going to Family Court and checking out......even if you get greater custody.

[Lou Girardin]

Labour basically

Bullshit. The Nats stuck the knife in when they were in power too. Different motivation, same end result.

As for child support, for every guy getting bled white, there's a woman left near destitute because some tosser's done a runner.

[Grahameeboy]

Surely in any case where custody is equally shared and both parents have jobs then they are both assessed on their incomes & the one with the higher amount pays the difference to the one with the lower amount. That is how I understand things work now.
Edit - unless a benefit is involved or there is a claim made, then no payment may be the order of the day. Voluntary assistance with actual expenses would be ideal??

Probably but all I want is the house mate......my parents will help when needed and my ex still needs to be able to look after Nats, buy a house etc when things are sorted and I don't want her to have less and these things are more important than 'benefit'.....yep I know I am mad but just having Natalie and being able to look after her is more important.

[riffer]

Hey Bret,

you and I discussed this via PMs last year, and while I sympathise with your situation, I am also happy to report that I have more or less resolved the situation with my ex regarding Zach and Jess.

Inland Revenue down here have been leaning on people to arrange their own child support payments, and after some persuading, my ex decided to go along with it and discuss a private arrangement.

We talked about the kids needs, our own situations and came up with an amount both her and I were happy with - $600 per month.

I've recently got a new job working back in advertising again, and have gotten a good pay rise to do it (along with more hours).

If she was to petition IRD for a reassessment (which she is entitled to) I would have been assessed at $930 a month.

So, I'm very happy this has worked out, considering 12 months ago the only way we communicated was through lawyers.

I am also concerned about the inequities of this system. As mentioned previously, IRD would have me pay $930 a month to my ex. For each child I support, they allow me $52 a month to support, compared to the $465 for the ones who don't live with me.

This does not take into account that fact that between them, my ex and her new partner clear over $150,000 a year. Their income is not assessable.

But get this - if my wife gets a job - her income is assessable!

My advice - do whatever it takes to get a private agreement. Even if you have to eat shit to do it. Which is pretty much what IRD wants you to do.

[Grahameeboy]

As for child support, for every guy getting bled white, there's a woman left near destitute because some tosser's done a runner.

True but not quite to the twisted extent you suggest Lou.....

[MSTRS]

Bullshit. The Nats stuck the knife in when they were in power too. Different motivation, same end result. True. Nats took responsibility from DSW as was & gave to IRD (bigger teeth)


As for child support, for every guy getting bled white, there's a woman left near destitute because some tosser's done a runner.DPB is not reduced if father is named. It pays well enough that it is a valid carrer choice for shitloads of scabbers

[Grahameeboy]

Hey Bret,

My advice - do whatever it takes to get a private agreement. Even if you have to eat shit to do it. Which is pretty much what IRD wants you to do.

Agree...........................best outcome is No1 priority in my case.

[MSTRS]

Probably but all I want is the house mate......my parents will help when needed and my ex still needs to be able to look after Nats, buy a house etc when things are sorted and I don't want her to have less and these things are more important than 'benefit'.....yep I know I am mad but just having Natalie and being able to look after her is more important.
Not knocking mate. If it works, don't fix it.

[Patrick]

But get this - if my wife gets a job - her income is assessable!


Is her income assessable to go toward your support payments? Has nothing to do with her... that can't be right.

[SpeedyGirl]

This is why I will NEVER spawn.


Meeeeee toooooooo!!!! I can't even contemplate having kids!!!! ewwwwwww

[Fatjim]

oh to be paying just $930 a month?

[sAsLEX]

As for child support, for every guy getting bled white, there's a woman left near destitute because some tosser's done a runner.

Does that make it ok?



This does not take into account that fact that between them, my ex and her new partner clear over $150,000 a year. Their income is not assessable.

But get this - if my wife gets a job - her income is assessable!


This seems a bit arse.

[Grahameeboy]

Meeeeee toooooooo!!!! I can't even contemplate having kids!!!! ewwwwwww

but in my case, my girl is worth it...

[SpeedyGirl]

but in my case, my girl is worth it...

Don't get me wrong, I love other people's kids....... even have my niece living with me (16)........ just don't want any of my own

[DirtMad]

Vasectomy :2thumbsup ,or change your aim :2guns:

hehe, just kidding.

These policies sound unbelievable... I feel for your plight.

[Grahameeboy]

Not knocking mate. If it works, don't fix it.

I understand matey.....guess for me I want less battles but want to win the war which is looking after my Daughter who has to be the winner in all this.

[Grahameeboy]

Vasectomy :2thumbsup ,or change your aim :2guns:

and where would you aim.........I wonder

[Grahameeboy]

Don't get me wrong, I love other people's kids....... even have my niece living with me (16)........ just don't want any of my own

No no....I didn't get ya wrong Speedo.........youz have to do what you are happy with but I tell ya if you met Natalie you may just have a board meeting........

[Quasievil]

As for child support, for every guy getting bled white, there's a woman left near destitute because some tosser's done a runner.

Not correct , generalisation with no substance, cliche at best

[team cudby]

hi my partner pays $60 for a month for one and i grt $60 a month for three kids bugger wish i got a little more i get $60 when he is unemployed:gob: :bash:

[Quasievil]

hi my partner pays $60 for a month for one and i grt $60 a month for three kids bugger wish i got a little more i get $60 when he is unemployed:gob: :bash:

Doesnt that make an arse of the whole thing ? my boy gets $750 you get $60 ? hows that for a gap ? does your child need anything less than mine, I think not

[team cudby]

Doesnt that make an arse of the whole thing ? my boy gets $750 you get $60 ? hows that for a gap ? does your child need anything less than mine, I think notyes my 14 yr old has ADHD and costs us a small fortune monthly in drugs and he is a human garbage disposel so he eats like there is no tomorrow

[Sutage]

if your ex gets a new partner then all 'legal requirements' to pay should be finished, if you and her can arrange a payment or something together then wicked !

[Psalm42]

unfortunetly people do break up, nothing like a knife implanted in oneself to encourage that eh ?

Why is her income not assesed ? its alot more than mine

Why is the fact that I have him every other weekend not considered ?

Why is the fact I have him for holidays not considered ?



Are you willing to fight IRD?
IRD only need two things to determine how it all works out....
One primary caregiver... HER
One payer... YOU.
You are right, they will shaft you cause you are the payer. Even with equal shared care custody, I know of guys still being billed for child support, when they have there children week on week off. A smack down the middle 50/50. Even chirstmas con day is half. IRD still bill him for child support.

My sugestion to you is, if you are willing to fight, it can be showen how you can get to the minimum amount throught IRD, then as your spouse is not on dpb, she will quickly come to you and be willing to discuss a private arrangement to get more than the 12 bucks or whatever the minimum is. It will put you in a better negotiating position. Then you can have her supply info showing actual costs and inconveniances she has due to the primary caregiveing position she is currently in and you can offer to have your Son more often to relieve her of that. And she will have on paper some costs you can call down the middle. You will of course then deduct the half cost you carry on the times you have your Son.

[ManDownUnder]

Just to clarify..

Does the recipient actually get all of the amount paid by the partner, or does IRD somehow get a cut/credit/processing fee?

[Swoop]

To quote WINJA... "up the bum = no babies"....:eek:

and obviously no financial responsibilities either.:violin:

[Psalm42]

Just to clarify..

Does the recipient actually get all of the amount paid by the partner, or does IRD somehow get a cut/credit/processing fee?

Depends on wether or not the partner is on a benifit

[ManDownUnder]

Depends on wether or not the partner is on a benifit

ok - ta. Was just wonderin' how much the state was benefitting from this stupid arrangement.

[Psalm42]

ok - ta. Was just wonderin' how much the state was benefitting from this stupid arrangement.

Not forgetting thats on top of the 50 to 60% the state gets from you normaly.

Child support payers get well and truly screwed. Cause 50 to 60% isnt well and truly screwed. Its not until your over 61% that your getting shafted... :laugh:

[MSTRS]

Not forgetting thats on top of the 50 to 60% the state gets from you normaly.

Child support payers get well and truly screwed. Cause 50 to 60% isnt well and truly screwed. Its not until your over 61% that your getting shafted... :laugh:
Where do you get those % from??
Child support is worked out thusly....
Your gross income minus 'allowable' expenses - 18% of what is left for one child, 24% for 2 or more. Unless it has recently changed, any income you have over $60k gross is not subject to to this 'tax'

[Quasievil]

any income you have over $60k gross is not subject to to this 'tax'

err yes it is mate, keeps gong, doesnt stop at $60k I can assure you of that.

I just picked up me boy so Im good now, thanks all for your comments, I will fight again on Monday !!!!

[Ixion]

Stops at $97000 odd it seems.

here be the rules :
http://www.ird.govt.nz/childsupport/paying-parents/assessments/cs-howmuchtopay-childsupportformula.html#step1

[MSTRS]

Oh bugger. Must have changed fairly recently then. What about the minimum?? Used to be $10pw regardless of income.
Have a superb w/e with your young fella - it does help with perspective.

[Ixion]

Minimum is $707 per year. even if you have no income. Dunno how that works.

[yungatart]

Quasi, that sucks ! I've been both sides of the child support thing and I can say that no matter what side you're on, you'll be screwed. The easiest option is a private agreement - if your ex will play nice, that is. I wish you luck. fighting red tape/bureaucracy is a thankless task.
Go have a good w/e with your boy-after all, he is the important part of this.

[SPman]

Labour basically
And did the Nats do anything about it - like fuck.
Im in a mens group and there are guys there whos second relationships are being fucked because of exorbitant amounts being bled out - like 60% of after tax income, when they are supporting a new partner and child. Levy -(which DOESNT go to the children - it goes to the tax dept!) based on one years very good earnings several years ago, when he now earns less than half the amount.

[MSTRS]

Tell your mate to go for a review, if your income has dropped, the CS payments will too, they may not have a pulse but they are not totally heartless..

[Psalm42]

Where do you get those % from??
Child support is worked out thusly....
Your gross income minus 'allowable' expenses - 18% of what is left for one child, 24% for 2 or more. Unless it has recently changed, any income you have over $60k gross is not subject to to this 'tax'

The 60k issue has been answered.

The 50 to 60% I talk of is the amount of direct and indirect taxes most people pay normaly with out issues like childsupport.

20 to 40 % income tax, 12.5 % on everything you spend, not for getting the GST you pay on other taxes like gas, smokes, booze, rates etc.
Then there is the taxes on your vises, I dont know exact numbers anymore, I guess its 50 to 60 cents on gas, 6 bucks per pack, as for booze its got to be high. Last time I was in maylasia a bottle of single malt cost me $28 nz. Costs me $120 here. So lets call it 40% booze tax. When you add all the hidden taxes up you will find it adds up to the 50 to 60% mark.

Its been a while since I did the actual caluculations. Try it for yourself..

[Maha]

All up i pay around $10,000 pa to my ex,we kept away from the IRD and just came to a fair amount that i could afford at the time. About $7000 of that money is for my eldest daughter, she's in Oamaru at boarding school and i pay. Never here me complain at all, maybe the odd sigh, but they are my children so thats what you do right?. I dont think of what the ex is doing, no point, she gets family support as well, i dont, and i dont care, i just dont care, if i did i would end up with an ulcer, and that would hurt when i ride the bike, which i have and she dosent...................:banana:

[cowboyz]

My ex got a pretty damn good settlement when we split. Spent shitloads of $$ in the courts getting everything sorted only to be told that because I am male I haven't a hope in hell. Now they take far too much money every month. I have a new partner and a couple of kids at home at the one child from my previous relationship gets more money than both my kids at home get. How fair is that? If I had known then what I know now I would have done a runner overseas way back then. Without a doubt. Now I am *surposed* to have my daughter on holidays and every second weekend. I *actually* get to see her twice a year if I am lucky. Couldn't give a rats arse now. It simply costs too much to run back to court every two minutes complaining about how my evil witch of an ex does not abide by the agreement that was arranged through the courts (which she claimed legal aid and had the government cover court costs while I was paying $180/hour for a damn lawyer to read her crap letters about how hard life is when you have to go out a work for a living.. she never worked (never needed to) when we were together)

At some stage you just have to weigh up the economics of having an ex. The child has very little to do with it.

[inlinefour]

I now pay over $500-00 per week, joys of being young and stupid? Na, I just look forward to when he comes to live with us...

[babyB]

hmmm there are many views to this

i do agree that the IRD system sucks...
but here's a thought for you......
my baby's daddy is in heaven!
It seams IRD is unable to collect maintance from heaven, hence we dont get it.

what is more important fighting a loosing battle or the harmony for our children.....be thankful you have your children as they are thankful they have you

[Rhino]

My ex got a pretty damn good settlement when we split. Now I am *surposed* to have my daughter on holidays and every second weekend. I *actually* get to see her twice a year if I am lucky.
Shit Cowboyz that sounds so familiar.:argh: When I separated, I signed over the house and walked out with a couple of plastic rubbish bags containing my bits and pieces.:thud:

I also negotiated a separation agreement to pay her mortgage for the next three years (as she was going to Teachers College as a trainee teacher) and was guaranteed "reasonable access" to my children.:whistle:

For the first 5 years I never saw my kids. One time I only learned that "we will be going away" 24 hours before I was about to ride down to Christchurch.:2guns:

The worst part was the fact that I notified IRD the day that we separated and gave them all my contact details. 3 months later they rang me on a Friday afternoon and said "we want $3,000 by Monday." I told them to go whistle and we sorted out a deal that ended up with me paying about 70% of my salary to the pricks.:brick:

[Winston001]

Just a few points.

IRD don't set the formula or the rates of Child Support - Cabinet does by regulation.

Many fathers don't bother to see their kids at all. I'm not talking about those decent guys who give up because their ex makes it too hard - they have my sympathy. But I often have contact with women stressed out because the dad didn't turn up (again) for his access weekend and the 6yr old kid wants mum to explain why.

It takes two people to have a child. They are both responsible for it until the child is independant. When a man or women refuses to pay child support, guess who picks up the tab - you and me, the taxpayer. Either through paying a benefit or through Family Support.

So it is hard to have much sympathy for any parent who expects the rest of the nation and the other parent to pick up the whole tab.

The trouble is that Child Support is a one-size-fits-all system. It has to be - otherwise the bureacuracy to deal with every individual case and every change of circumstances would become an entirely new government department. Like we need that. So it is clumsy and at times unfair.

The best answer would be for people not to have unplanned children and be in a committed relationship when they do. This is of supreme importance for the child who tends to get overlooked in these arguments.

[Skyryder]

FUCKEN ARSEHOLES IRD MOTHER FUCKERS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i know have to pay the creature from the deep the suckulous ugly munt of a woman a figure which is even more fucken ridiculous.

IM SO FUCKEN ANGRY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

just got my next years notice


CUNTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Just remember Quasi it won't last forever. Nothing does. Shit smells the worst when it is the freshest. No smell when it has rotted and decayed. Sleep on it ol' son. Not the shit............... the thought.

Skyryder

[Timber020]

I have seen many different sides of this debate. Fathers getting custody by getting all there family and friends to lie about the mother and getting full custody. Kids spend the rest of their childhood getting the crap kicked out of them and worked like dogs.

The system is always going to be unjust in some way, but no ones starving here, and we seem to be able to spend alot of money on bikes all the same.

Suck it up, your a man, and you have kids, how can it be a suprise that its costing you more than your comfortable with?

[Skyryder]

I have seen many different sides of this debate. Fathers getting custody by getting all there family and friends to lie about the mother and getting full custody. Kids spend the rest of their childhood getting the crap kicked out of them and worked like dogs.

The system is always going to be unjust in some way, but no ones starving here, and we seem to be able to spend alot of money on bikes all the same.

Suck it up, your a man, and you have kids, how can it be a suprise that its costing you more than your comfortable with?

I've seen a father so crippled financly by his lying wife that he killed himself. Lost his kids. Lost his own family who sided with his misses. It wasn't until the funeril when his wife did not bother to show up or even send the family any sympathy that they suddenly realised what a bitch she was.

I can 'sock it' to any one who rides dangerously and think nothing of it but Quai's post highlighted that he is pretty pissed off. Good reason or not. I don't know. But as a fellow KB biker he has my unqualified support.

Skyryder

[SPman]

Ive seen a guy who came home to find his wife in bed with a neighbour. 2 kids. Gave the wife the 8 acre block and basically . everything.Thought he had signed an agreeement saying thiat was it! Walked away with his last pay cheque. Denied access to his kids...[not legally - he'd turn up to see/pick them up - oh, they're away for the weekend]. Formed a new relationship, had twins, his ex came back fro Oz - so poor she could only fly 5 horses over....dumped the boyfriend and married a local vet! Then hit this guy with a court case for $235,000 for what she considered was back maintenance! Almost totally fucked his (8yr) relationship! Still denied access to his kids! When the younger kid went of the rails, he got a filthy letter saying it was all his fault!
Court case cost him $40,000, she arrived in a BMW dripping with diamonds...sort off fucked her, "poor me" case a bit, but it still cost him big time! With the stresses involved, his current relationship is almost fucked...and the courts didnt give a fuck. He was the bogey man for leaving his kids......pay pay pay....and to hell with his newer family!


The trouble is that Child Support is a one-size-fits-all system. It has to be - otherwise the bureacuracy to deal with every individual case and every change of circumstances would become an entirely new government department. Like we need that. So it is clumsy and at times unfair.
Thats the trouble with this country - a "one size fits all" mentality! It has never worked in the past, nor will it in the future. So - rather fuck up lives all over the country for expediency, than provide a government that cares for its constituent parts!! Seems to be the size of it! As long as they expect no respect, co operation or sympathy with an active section working against it, fine! But they say they're working in the interests of society!
The older I get, rather than become conservative, I subscribe more to Ixions professed philosophy.
Up against the wall, you MoFo's!

[Cookie]

I quite like the idea of a small apartment in town, close to work. The kids can visit when they like and I can live in peace.

Trouble is, it's too bloody expensive. Child support is a big part of the bill but the amount does not seem out of whack with reality to me (if I take into account the cost of housing in Auckland).

So I stay and I stay but I am lucky I can. Things are not quite so f*cked that I can't live here anymore (yet).

It is a one-size fits all system and so there are some pretty perverse and hurtful situations that can occur. I feel sorry for those guys caught in bad situations. I in my case, I think "they are MY kids" and they are entitled to benefit from a proportion of my personal earnings while they are dependents so I will be paying without complaint when my time comes.

[SARGE]

tried custody, Im a man....... screwed by default


quasi..

demand receipts as to where the $$ is going... it is your right to make sure she is spending that on the kid.. ( including power bill, water.. etc)
yes, its a bitch but your kid has to come first.. before work, your bikes, social life, ...before anything

second.. you are NOT screwed by default... i have custody of my son from the States..itcost me quite a bit to get it but it is worth every dollar..i would have paid 10x more if i needed to..

[Quasievil]

quasi..

demand receipts as to where the $$ is going... it is your right to make sure she is spending that on the kid.. ( including power bill, water.. etc)
yes, its a bitch but your kid has to come first.. before work, your bikes, social life, ...before anything

second.. you are NOT screwed by default... i have custody of my son from the States..itcost me quite a bit to get it but it is worth every dollar..i would have paid 10x more if i needed to..

Really ? I think I would be told where to go, who would back me up on that one ? is it actualy the law ?

[SARGE]

Really ? I think I would be told where to go, who would back me up on that one ? is it actualy the law ?


dont know if its law here .. but im sure a good lawyer could make it happen.. it ism, after all.. looking after the best interests of the child ... making sure the breeder isnt blowing a few hundy at the casino...

[NC]

Yeah, my bitch of a mother blackmailed my dad into giving her everything. So he did. And still had to pay child support payments plus some of the morgage mum still managed to have him by the nuts getting every cent she could out of him. She's an evil woman.:mad: The kids always choose their side in the end.

[Winston001]

Ive seen a guy who came home to find his wife in bed with a neighbour. 2 kids. Gave the wife the 8 acre block and basically . everything.Thought he had signed an agreeement saying thiat was it! Walked away with his last pay cheque. Denied access to his kids...[not legally - he'd turn up to see/pick them up - oh, they're away for the weekend]. Formed a new relationship, had twins, his ex came back fro Oz - so poor she could only fly 5 horses over....dumped the boyfriend and married a local vet! Then hit this guy with a court case for $235,000 for what she considered was back maintenance! Almost totally fucked his (8yr) relationship! Still denied access to his kids! When the younger kid went of the rails, he got a filthy letter saying it was all his fault!
Court case cost him $40,000, she arrived in a BMW dripping with diamonds...sort off fucked her, "poor me" case a bit, but it still cost him big time! With the stresses involved, his current relationship is almost fucked...and the courts didnt give a fuck. He was the bogey man for leaving his kids......pay pay pay....and to hell with his newer family!


Sadly I believe every word. Only a small percentage of women are this vicious but when you consider the sheer number of separated couples, that still adds up to thousands of similar situations.

All I can say is that when you separate, go to a family lawyer and at least get straight on the law. There doesn't need to be a battle - in fact the majority of couples sort things out with only light legal guidance. No dramas or court cases.

Unfortunately quite a few men walk away, leaving the house etc for the wife and children, thinking they are doing the right thing. They fail to realise that doesn't cover Child Support obligations which comes as a shock later.

Also these decent guys don't consider what will happen when the wife gets a new partner, because things change. They also don't consider the future effects on their own new relationships and new children. Understandable because they feel miserable and just want to do the right thing now, never mind the future.

So go to a lawyer. It might take only one visit and save you $thousands and a lot of heartache in the future.

[iwilde]

I have an agrement with my x, I only pay for what my girl needs and thats it. When she needs clothes, school fees, new bike etc I pay. I'd hate to see my hard erned cash pay for my x's lifestyle of booze and drugs. Some months it about $600 & other months its only about $200. It was either this way or seeing I'm a self employed contractor I will "borrow X amount" from my business thus giving me a nill income and only have to pay the min of $10/week. She saw the light early on and has agreed to do it my way or get fuck all from me. At the end of the day you gotta look after what you produced, don't expect the tax payers to pay for you.

[Psalm42]

It was either this way or seeing I'm a self employed contractor I will "borrow X amount" from my business thus giving me a nill income and only have to pay the min of $10/week. She saw the light early on and has agreed to do it my way or get fuck all from me. At the end of the day you gotta look after what you produced, don't expect the tax payers to pay for you.


Right on.....

Now, all anyone has to do is find out how to do the same thing when an employee.

When your ex is on a benifit they dont see much of a change in benifit until you pay more than they collect. But when they are not on a benifit negotiation is all they have when IRD can only collect the minimum.


Fair comes into play, but some times you must play hard to get fair...

But then again I am one of these people that believe parents should have 50/50 shared care custody if they can't live together.

[Skyryder]

But then again I am one of these people that believe parents should have 50/50 shared care custody if they can't live together.

Children need stabilitly. I've seen too may fucked up becasue they have been treated like a yo-yo.

Skyryder

[Finn]

When it come to matters such as this, it certainly pays not to be a hard working white male in this fucking country. Most of the man hating laws must be introduced when it's rag week. The sad thing is that in most cases it's the kids that come off worse.

[Psalm42]

Children need stabilitly. I've seen too may fucked up becasue they have been treated like a yo-yo.

Skyryder

Your quite correct, the stabilitly of knowing that one week you are at dads and one week you are at mums. And knowing that mum or dad changing her/his mind because they have an issue with the other will no longer be affecting where you will be staying any given week. The stabilitly of knowing when week on week off is set in concrete, you will not be used as a tool to manipulate the other parent.

[Sutage]

hey this might not be ideal thread to post but i have a question regarding this
say i buy a house now at 18 with just my name on it, say 20 years i get divorced etc, does she have any right to it?
thx for any help:P

[thehollowmen]

I'm so glad I'm sterile.

[Madness]

Up The Bum = No Babies :shake:

[FROSTY]

Im in the same boat--Yea I got my F$$$$$ assesment too -same sorta money as brett.
One point I'd like made clear--the money a guy pays doesn't go to the kids or the mother of the kids---it goes to the f$$## goverment.
I could pay 2k a month and my kids get not a penny more.
Darn Im so lucky I've got shared custody of my kids.

[Warr]

hey this might not be ideal thread to post but i have a question regarding this
say i buy a house now at 18 with just my name on it, say 20 years i get divorced etc, does she have any right to it?
thx for any help:P
After 2 years there is no His and Hers, its all Shared.... That is unless you get a legal Pre-Nuptual agreement done :(

[Winston001]

One point I'd like made clear--the money a guy pays doesn't go to the kids or the mother of the kids---it goes to the f$$## goverment.
I could pay 2k a month and my kids get not a penny more.


Hang on a moment - that is plain wrong. The money you pay goes to help the long-suffering taxpayer who is paying a social welfare benefit to your wife. How about you and your wife picking up the whole tab. After-all the rest of us didn't marry you or father your children. Why should the taxpayer fund you when you are working?

If your wife is not on a benefit then all of the Child Support you pay goes to her to help provide for the kids. IRD don't even charge an administration fee - thats left to us taxpayers to pick up. :shit:

[Winston001]

hey this might not be ideal thread to post but i have a question regarding this
say i buy a house now at 18 with just my name on it, say 20 years i get divorced etc, does she have any right to it?
thx for any help:P

You'd have been better to start another thread. But anyway, yes, your wife/partner will be able to claim against the matrimonial home even though she isn't an owner, after 3 years (Not 2).

As Warr said, the best insurance is to have her sign a relationship property contracting-out Agreement saying the house is your separate property. Mind you, she doesn't have to sign, and I've got to tell you that after 20 years, the Agreement will probably be set aside by the Court.

[Grahameeboy]

In my case, my Wife who had an affair told me to move out....I said "No".....she threatened me with a 'Seperation Order'...there was no abuse.....6 weeks sleeping on the sofa and she moved out..........I normally don't stand up for myself but for my Daughter's sake I did and it will be worth it........Wife got a surprise....I get equal shared custody of Natalie who is disabled so despite being treated like an invisible Father, I reckon I am doing alright....will end up keeping house and keeping my relationship with Natalie.

Not too many complaints my end....gotta make the most I say.

[Quasievil]

Children need stabilitly. I've seen too may fucked up becasue they have been treated like a yo-yo.

Skyryder

Yes but children need their fathers to and boys especially so

[Grahameeboy]

Yes but children need their fathers to and boys especially so

Agree although Daughters need their Fathers as much as Boys so....Daddy's girl and all that

[Grahameeboy]

Darn Im so lucky I've got shared custody of my kids.

Most important in my mind..............

[Free to Ride]

after reading how much you guys pay!! I walked out with 3 kids, we didnt even have a chair to sit on or plates to eat off - my ex pays $58 month child support and wont pay anything else. How do you explain to your kid that you cant pay school fees so they cant get the school mag etc - anyway all you guys that have worked it out good one, and for the guys that are getting screwed - it does suck aye.

[Grahameeboy]

after reading how much you guys pay!! I walked out with 3 kids, we didnt even have a chair to sit on or plates to eat off - my ex pays $58 month child support and wont pay anything else. How do you explain to your kid that you cant pay school fees so they cant get the school mag etc - anyway all you guys that have worked it out good one, and for the guys that are getting screwed - it does suck aye.

True but you have your kids mate........tell them the truth....if they have not already worked it out.......have you tried the Family Court?

[riffer]

Don't get me started on family court Grahameboy ...

They've got that one sewn up well.

I could tell you all about how I got screwed by Judge M**s, who looked at an equal shared custody agreement I'd paid thousands for, and declared "This agreement is all very well Mr ********, but it's obviously not working for the mother of the children, so let's just set that aside, all right?"

... but as it's illegal to talk about family court I won't - suffice to say I'd rather cut off my dick than go back to that man-hating shithole.

[Grahameeboy]

Don't get me started on family court Grahameboy ...

They've got that one sewn up well.

I could tell you all about how I got screwed by Judge M**s, who looked at an equal shared custody agreement I'd paid thousands for, and declared "This agreement is all very well Mr ********, but it's obviously not working for the mother of the children, so let's just set that aside, all right?"

... but as it's illegal to talk about family court I won't - suffice to say I'd rather cut off my dick than go back to that man-hating shithole.

Real sorry to hear matey..........we have an informal agreement but I have kept a diary since June to cover any future problems because Kate just does things without telling me to suit her.......my situation is probably different as Natalie is disabled and I have had chats to FC and they have actually told me to apply for a hearing......but right now I need to win the war of keeping the house so this battle can wait.
I will add ya to my buddy list if you want to call me for a rant about things.

[Psalm42]

Don't get me started on family court Grahameboy ...

They've got that one sewn up well.

I could tell you all about how I got screwed by Judge M**s, who looked at an equal shared custody agreement I'd paid thousands for, and declared "This agreement is all very well Mr ********, but it's obviously not working for the mother of the children, so let's just set that aside, all right?"



If what you have said here is exactly what the judge said, he was asking your premission to set it aside. All right? Being a question. A judge needs your co-opertation to be involved in a private agreement. They always at some point make it a question. Hope you didnt pay your lawyer to much.

Sorry to point it out too late for you, I would sugest the thing to have said was that you accept it is not working for the mother, and therefore so as not to cause you any damage you will accept full custody.

[Psalm42]

In my case, my Wife who had an affair told me to move out....I said "No".....she threatened me with a 'Seperation Order'...there was no abuse.....6 weeks sleeping on the sofa and she moved out..........I normally don't stand up for myself but for my Daughter's sake I did and it will be worth it........Wife got a surprise....I get equal shared custody of Natalie who is disabled so despite being treated like an invisible Father, I reckon I am doing alright....will end up keeping house and keeping my relationship with Natalie.

Not too many complaints my end....gotta make the most I say.


Good on ya for standing your ground. To many guys think it the right thing to do to walk away. As for keeping the house, if I recall correctly you apply for occupancy, provide proof you can not afford to rebuy with your share, get an order that the house does not sell till your Daughter is 16. Providing the necesities of life for you daughter should be more important to the court than anything else.

Law may have changed by now. So I may be wrong on that.

[Winston001]

Don't get me started on family court Grahameboy ...

They've got that one sewn up well.

I could tell you all about how I got screwed by Judge M**s, who looked at an equal shared custody agreement I'd paid thousands for, and declared "This agreement is all very well Mr ********, but it's obviously not working for the mother of the children, so let's just set that aside, all right?"

... but as it's illegal to talk about family court I won't - suffice to say I'd rather cut off my dick than go back to that man-hating shithole.

Thats tough and your anger is understandable. Unfortunately the Judge isn't to blame or the Family Court. Any custody (now called "Day to Day Care") agreement or Court Order can be varied or set aside at any time.

This is because family circumstances change from time to time. It isn't in children's interests to set custody in concrete when they are 5 years old. The custodial parent might get sick, want to move to another country, or move in with the Mongrel Mob. So you'd want the right to change the terms to protect the child.

And the child is what the system is all about. Too many parents see the Family Court as a place to have a go at each other and get revenge. They don't realise that the child is the most important person so far as the Judge is concerned.

But Judges are human too. They get lied to by parents and women are much better than guys at manipulation. So injustices sometimes happen.

[Grahameeboy]

Good on ya for standing your ground. To many guys think it the right thing to do to walk away. As for keeping the house, if I recall correctly you apply for occupancy, provide proof you can not afford to rebuy with your share, get an order that the house does not sell till your Daughter is 16. Providing the necesities of life for you daughter should be more important to the court than anything else.

Law may have changed by now. So I may be wrong on that.

I am lucky cause my folks are gonna help me keep house.....problem with the 16 thing is that Natalie requires full time care and will do most of her life...she cannot walk and when she is too heavy to lift she cannot transfer from wheelchair to toilet etc so she will always have to live with a carer and I need the house, currently worth $750,000 as an asset cause I earn a lot less than my Wife plus Devonport is ideal for Nats accessibility around town and getting to Auckland......but your suggestion is still current and I could use this to my advantage cause Wife is arguing about GBP100,000 in UK and this money is my key to keeping house....she wants to go to Court when to me Natalie's care by both of us is key......

I always look at postives and I know that things will get sorted.....my diary will help.

[Winston001]

I am lucky cause my folks are gonna help me keep house.....problem with the 16 thing is that Natalie requires full time care and will do most of her life...she cannot walk and when she is too heavy to lift she cannot transfer from wheelchair to toilet etc so she will always have to live with a carer and I need the house, currently worth $750,000 as an asset cause I earn a lot less than my Wife plus Devonport is ideal for Nats accessibility around town and getting to Auckland......but your suggestion is still current and I could use this to my advantage cause Wife is arguing about GBP100,000 in UK and this money is my key to keeping house....she wants to go to Court when to me Natalie's care by both of us is key......

I always look at postives and I know that things will get sorted.....my diary will help.

Keeping a diary is good. Just be careful not to be too precise or you'll look obsessive.

Relationship property law presumes equal sharing and a fresh start so a Court Order to sell a house is always on the cards. The theory is that it lets each person get on with their own lives.

However the law also allows the house to be occupied by one party for such period as may be necessary to provide a home for the children. So there is no sale in the meantime.

Every situation is different but it sounds like you have a good argument Graham for the house not to be sold. This is particularly true if your wife has alternative accomodation already. Your daughters needs are the most important matter.

[DMNTD]

...the money a guy pays doesn't go to the kids or the mother of the kids---it goes to the f$$## goverment..

It's pretty easy to sort out an agreement between the two parents concerned which means IRD and WINZ have nothing to do with it...pretty much.
I know this having 5 kids and only the one living fulltime with me.

[Fatjim]

I am lucky cause my folks are gonna help me keep house.....problem with the 16 thing is that Natalie requires full time care and will do most of her life...she cannot walk and when she is too heavy to lift she cannot transfer from wheelchair to toilet etc so she will always have to live with a carer and I need the house, currently worth $750,000 as an asset cause I earn a lot less than my Wife plus Devonport is ideal for Nats accessibility around town and getting to Auckland......but your suggestion is still current and I could use this to my advantage cause Wife is arguing about GBP100,000 in UK and this money is my key to keeping house....she wants to go to Court when to me Natalie's care by both of us is key......

I always look at postives and I know that things will get sorted.....my diary will help.

I don't know how well you get on with your ex and whether she wants custody, but if she doesn't then it could be used as a threat, especially as it appears she may be out of the country.

Is she in the UK?, do custody/child support laws apply to her? Is she still a tax resident? Can you tell her to go F!@K herself?

[enigma51]

A quick question just to see if im getting all this (not that it will help me in anyway as we cant have children) but basically if you and ex dont see eye to eye which is about ooooo 99% of the time i mean thats why you got divorced then you pay money to the tax man thats pay it too your ex. Know do they pay the full amount or just some of it.

Cause if they pay only a part of it to her then it means that only reason she is not agreeing to a private deal is because she is bitter and whan too fuck you over!

[NordieBoy]

Know do they pay the full amount or just some of it.
They pay the full amount if the caregiver is working.
Part amount if on a benefit.

[enigma51]

They pay the full amount if the caregiver is working.
Part amount if on a benefit.

So basically its all about how much your ex can screw you over with? If she does a private deal she gets the money but you are not screwed she does it via the ird and she know you are going to get fucked! Nice system! :gob:

[Winston001]

So basically its all about how much your ex can screw you over with? If she does a private deal she gets the money but you are not screwed she does it via the ird and she know you are going to get fucked! Nice system! :gob:

I give up.

Enigma - read the last 2 pages of posts and your questions will be answered.

[Sutage]

rofl asking for a prenuptial is hardly ideal
oh yes honey i love you so much and wish to spend the rest of my days with you.. oh btw sign this.
anyone actually got one of these ?
like i need to think of this shit anyway, i only 18 i dont have your problems:P

[scumdog]

rofl asking for a prenuptial is hardly ideal
oh yes honey i love you so much and wish to spend the rest of my days with you.. oh btw sign this.
anyone actually got one of these ?
like i need to think of this shit anyway, i only 18 i dont have your problems:P

Patience grasshopper, patience, it will all come to you in the fullness of time.....

At age 48 THEN you will have these problems:yeah: :yes:

[DMNTD]

...anyone actually got one of these ?


Yes...Peace of mind sir and because we're not in the Dark Ages it's peace of mind for the Lady too as more often than not if entering a "pre-loved model" they already have screwed someone else over so they have their winnings to protect too

[Finn]

A professionally established Trust that is well administered also does the trick. It protects you from most of the nasty people if things turn to custard.

A cheaper option is the girlfriend exchange program. You must document the day you first laid eyes on the woman, then execute the termination proceedure at around 20 month's. NEVER fall in love and whatever you do, don't mention the "M" word. It also pays not team up with a stunner. Get hitched to an average looking lady, then when you terminate, it's not such a big deal.

[Grahameeboy]

I don't know how well you get on with your ex and whether she wants custody, but if she doesn't then it could be used as a threat, especially as it appears she may be out of the country.

Is she in the UK?, do custody/child support laws apply to her? Is she still a tax resident? Can you tell her to go F!@K herself?

She still lives here wth her Mum and we both have equal shared custody.

We get on to a point but ours is quite complex because of Natalie and she resents the fact that I bonded better....no ones fault just circumstances, she was home late so I did most of the prime care, we both wanted more kids but 1 in 4 chance of same risk as we are both carriers of SMA Gene and only other way is IVF etc with 20% success rate so you can guess the issues.
With Kate it is a power thing.....I have asked for extra time and that is fine but when it comes to medical appointments, changes to Day Care which affect me she does not discuss with me.......she will not deal with Natalies questions about walking so this is left to me.......
And no I cannot tell her to fuck her self because it is not in my nature and I need to keep the house so need to keep my mouth shut....after that I will stand up more....I have already which surprised her which has created more resentment and with my folks in UK I am fighting alone.....
But I have faith and unconditional love for Natalie so things will be okay

[Grahameeboy]

A professionally established Trust that is well administered also does the trick. It protects you from most of the nasty people if things turn to custard.

A cheaper option is the girlfriend exchange program. You must document the day you first laid eyes on the woman, then execute the termination proceedure at around 20 month's. NEVER fall in love and whatever you do, don't mention the "M" word. It also pays not team up with a stunner. Get hitched to an average looking lady, then when you terminate, it's not such a big deal.

So that is why you have had 37 girlfriends!!!!

[Finn]

She still lives here wth her Mum and we both have equal shared custody.

We get on to a point but ours is quite complex because of Natalie and she resents the fact that I bonded better....no ones fault just circumstances, she was home late so I did most of the prime care, we both wanted more kids but 1 in 4 chance of same risk as we are both carriers of SMA Gene and only other way is IVF etc with 20% success rate so you can guess the issues.
With Kate it is a power thing.....I have asked for extra time and that is fine but when it comes to medical appointments, changes to Day Care which affect me she does not discuss with me.......she will not deal with Natalies questions about walking so this is left to me.......
And no I cannot tell her to fuck her self because it is not in my nature and I need to keep the house so need to keep my mouth shut....after that I will stand up more....I have already which surprised her which has created more resentment and with my folks in UK I am fighting alone.....
But I have faith and unconditional love for Natalie so things will be okay

You're a good man Grahameeboy. I take my helmet off for you.

[Finn]

So that is why you have had 37 girlfriends!!!!

No, that's because I'm a prick.

[Grahameeboy]

No, that's because I'm a prick.

So it still works then........

[Grahameeboy]

You're a good man Grahameeboy. I take my helmet off for you.

Nah mate.......catch up soon eh.

[Finn]

Nah mate.......catch up soon eh.

I'll tell you in half an hour. I have a performance review with our receptionist shortly.

[Biff]

Here's a plan Quasi - sign the little bugger over to me, change his rego number, then I'll put him on the books of one of my loss attributing companies. Within 12 months, presuming you're on the higher rate of tax, we're in the $$ big style.

Life sucks. Shame she didn't only do life...


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[Quasievil]

Here's a plan Quasi - sign the little bugger over to me, change his rego number, then I'll put him on the books of one of my loss attributing companies. Within 12 months, presuming you're on the higher rate of tax, we're in the $$ big style.

Life sucks. Shame she didn't only do life...


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youre on dude make it so

[Fatjim]

She still lives here wth her Mum and we both have equal shared custody.

We get on to a point but ours is quite complex because of Natalie and she resents the fact that I bonded better....no ones fault just circumstances, she was home late so I did most of the prime care, we both wanted more kids but 1 in 4 chance of same risk as we are both carriers of SMA Gene and only other way is IVF etc with 20% success rate so you can guess the issues.
With Kate it is a power thing.....I have asked for extra time and that is fine but when it comes to medical appointments, changes to Day Care which affect me she does not discuss with me.......she will not deal with Natalies questions about walking so this is left to me.......
And no I cannot tell her to fuck her self because it is not in my nature and I need to keep the house so need to keep my mouth shut....after that I will stand up more....I have already which surprised her which has created more resentment and with my folks in UK I am fighting alone.....
But I have faith and unconditional love for Natalie so things will be okay

Hope I didn't offend. I'm in a similar situation matrimonialy, my ex is sucking me dry, but I feel duty bound to provide for her and the kids, especially while they're young (2 at primary school, one at preschool). She takes most of what I earn and then complains it's not enough, more out of stupidity than malice though. I don't want the kids suffering with a working mum (apologies to those fems who are offended) so I have to provide enough to support them without her working, which means one trip to the pub a week and thats my spending money all gone, the welly crowd know how tight I am. :(.

Although this does even things up, if she threatens to restrict access, then I'd threaten to cut back her income. So far it's working "ok".:(

[ajturbo]

i understand mate...

but if it is THAT big .. you are not writing off enough from last year...

i'm sure your advertising buget must be getting bigger each race day?

go and see an accountant that will work with you on this.. you should only be paying the minmum amount...!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

the other option... like i have, get the kid back .. it's fun!!:banana:

getting him out on the bucket racing track next week ... i hope:banana:

hang in there matey

[Finn]

my ex is sucking me dry,

When you're done with her can I have her number?