View Full Version : 1 x wheel, 1 passenger, 1 x cop
A work mate needed a lift to the yocal bikie repair shop in order to pick up his ZXR400, so I offered him a lift on the back of the Biffbird. Sweet.
"Open herrr up a liddle for me on the da wai tere woodja ", he asked (he's Mexican).
Anyhoo - we set off, taking in a nice straight bit o' rural land to the way. A bit too much traffic around for me to open her up just yet, and with this slug in the cage in front of me is doing around 60 in a hundy zone, I get just a tad frustrated. Coz I woz really looking forward to showing off. Because I'm like that.
Anyhoo2 - A gap in oncoming traffic. I tap his leg then accelerate hard. Immediately, and unintentionally, the front wheel begins to come off the road as I come out of the nana's slipstream, and pootle past said nana at an accelerated pace...
Shit - Was that? Bollox it was.
Just as I pass nana in a monocyclic manner, I spy a cop, in my mirror, pulling up to the junction we’d recently passed.
Farq - Did he see me ? Nana pulls over, cop car overtakes him with his disco lights on. Bugger. So I pull over. Mehican and I dismount. Maricon (Mexican for gay-boy – the Mexican. I can’t pronounce his proper name.) asks me why we've stopped, so I point over his shoulder at the hofficer who has, by this point, parked behind us and crawled out of his cage.
Helmet off. Smile. Look guilty. Play it straight. It might just work.
"Hi", Me
"Wasn't it!", Cop
"I know. Scared the shit out of me it did". Me
"Really?", Cop
"Yup. I've never done one of those intentionally in my life", Me
"You really need to watch it with the extra weight on the back while riding such a powerful bike", Cop
I'm beginning to like this guy. He's not only got a sense of humour, but he's some experience in bikes.
So we go through the process of checking me out. My wallet is back in the office with my licence, so cop chats to control, all's good.
"Take it easy", says cop, as he walks off.
I like Friday's.
Thanks Mr Policeman.
Regards
Biff
Swoop
9th June 2006, 17:02
Nice to find a pleasant one who knows the extreme difficulties that a pillion can cause!
MidnightMike
9th June 2006, 17:04
Bloddy wicked story, thats how cops should be, nice work po po. :yes:
L. O. T. T. O.
T. I. C. K. E. T.
Now.
scumdog
9th June 2006, 17:06
You and BugJuice need to get together - things like that don't happen on this planet - no sirree bob it don't. Let off indeed!! Pah, try pulling the other one.
(Well not on KB if you follow the threads)
2much
9th June 2006, 17:11
I woz really looking forward to showing off. Because I'm like that.
Aren't we all?
onearmedbandit
9th June 2006, 17:26
So if I get me one of those pillion thingees I might stand a better chance of talking my way out of any trouble...
kiwifruit
9th June 2006, 17:30
phew!
Its good to hear the cops being decent stories
nice one
So if I get me one of those pillion thingees I might stand a better chance of talking my way out of any trouble...
I'd go for a tankslapper............
F**kin' cop!!
Should be sacked - leaving idiots on the roads endangering the rest of us innocent law-abiding citizens!
paturoa
9th June 2006, 17:49
"Open herrr up a liddle for me on the da wai tere woodja ", he asked (he's Mexican).
Thats the worst mexican accent I've heard in ages! r u sure he isn't scottish!
Sniper
9th June 2006, 18:04
You lucky bugger
Toast
9th June 2006, 18:53
@#$k da Piiigssss...
Oh, no he didn'...did he...
...quite a nice chap wasn't he...tra-ha
Aren't we all?
heheheheheh yep yep yep:blip: :blip:
White trash
9th June 2006, 19:33
You and BugJuice need to get together - things like that don't happen on this planet - no sirree bob it don't. Let off indeed!! Pah, try pulling the other one.
(Well not on KB if you follow the threads)
Fucken cops. all homos. The lot of em. Mostly with nice bikes.
Cocks.
Edbear
9th June 2006, 19:43
You and BugJuice need to get together - things like that don't happen on this planet - no sirree bob it don't. Let off indeed!! Pah, try pulling the other one.
(Well not on KB if you follow the threads)
You ol' cynic, you, Scummy! Everyone on KB loves de Police and wouldn't think of criticising, or making generalisations... Stories like this show just what a fine Force we have...:innocent:
Ps. Great story and shows how the right attitude makes a big difference to the outcome! :scooter:
Macktheknife
9th June 2006, 20:01
Good for you Biff, I reckon you may have just used up your luck for a while there mate. lol
Nice to hear a good cop story for a change, there are still some good ones after all huh?
scracha
9th June 2006, 20:06
Thats the worst mexican accent I've heard in ages! r u sure he isn't scottish!
cunt. Noo that's Scottish, ken whit ahum taukin aboot?
boomer
9th June 2006, 20:32
You and BugJuice need to get together - things like that don't happen on this planet - no sirree bob it don't. Let off indeed!! Pah, try pulling the other one.
(Well not on KB if you follow the threads)
Different breed of swine to the bastard that did me last nite.. i believe the one last nite was a Chester White, these pigs have medium sized, droopy ears. They usually have large litters and sought for their mothering ability. Boars of this breed are usually aggressive.
Don't get me wrong...No breed of swine is superior to the others. You should select pig based on its physical characteristics and the performance of its relatives (if you can get that information). Good quality feeder pigs should appear healthy, thrifty, vigorous, and alert.
Yorks are neat but they do get sun-burned, so if you get one you should plan on buying suntan lotion for your pig!
A healthy pig; It is important to maintain the health of your pig. The first 2 or 3 weeks are critical, so you should check your pigs several times each day during this period. Strong appetites, body temperatures of 102.5° F, sleek haircoats, and tightly curled tails are all signs of a healthy pig. Healthy pigs are active and alert with bright looks in their eyes.
A pig will give you many clues when it isn't feeling well. some of the clues are poor appetite, guantness, rough hair coat, a dull look in the eyes, excessive coughing, diarrhea, inactivity and lameness.
If you think a pig is sick, take its rectal temperature. If it is 2 degrees or more above normal, call a veterinarian immediately.
A common problem with pig is stress. Hauling, vaccinating, introducing it to strange surroundings and strange pigs can scare or stress a pig. When a pig is stressed, it will be more susceptible to sickness. It may eat less feed and grow slower. It is important to minimize stress, especially when you first get your pig home. Some common diseases are pneumonia, pseudo rabies (mad itch), and swine dysentery.
Ixion
9th June 2006, 20:46
...If you think a pig is sick, take its rectal temperature
No matter how dodgy the cop may look, trying to stuff something up his arse is not likely to be a wise move. Especially what with them packing tasers in the future.
boomer
9th June 2006, 20:48
No matter how dodgy the cop may look, trying to stuff something up his arse is not likely to be a wise move. Especially what with them packing tasers in the future.
Hey.. i reckon you'll have a good case in court Ixion.. " The health of teh Pig is paramount..."
Ixion
9th June 2006, 20:52
Well, of course if it was a FEMALE cop, I might (depending on chicky-factor of cop) be keen - purely as a public health measure of course.
beyond
9th June 2006, 20:59
hey, not your fault the extra lard on the back made the front wheel come up. Man, everyone knows a Blackbird can't wheelie without someone on the back aye? :)
Nic cop for once. If that had been me, I'd be looking at bars by now. :(
sunhuntin
9th June 2006, 21:26
No matter how dodgy the cop may look, trying to stuff something up his arse is not likely to be a wise move. Especially what with them packing tasers in the future.
an interesting use for the taser if one could get away with it!! make their short n curlies even more curlies!
hey, not your fault the extra lard on the back made the front wheel come up. Man, everyone knows a Blackbird can't wheelie without someone on the back aye?
I can't get it up any more than a foot off the throttle, in 1st. *R1* can loft it off the clutch in second though, and just about get third before the lard arse lands (the bike that is).
Not easy with such a long wheel base.
marty
9th June 2006, 23:39
the busa lifts the wheel with my son on pillion - just comes up nice and easy on the throttle. on my own though i'm a big scardey cat and just can't figure out how hard to accellerate/lift/feather the clutch etc
Lou Girardin
10th June 2006, 08:51
Yeah right!
It scared the shit out of me for 300 metres Occifer. Truly!
Nicksta
10th June 2006, 08:56
Dude.........
lucky...
scumdog
10th June 2006, 11:36
I'd go for a tankslapper............
Is that what you call it when your g'friend is sitting on front of you on the bike???????:blah:
scumdog
10th June 2006, 11:41
Fucken cops. all homos. The lot of em. Mostly with nice bikes.
Cocks.
See - NOW Trashy has it sorted in proper KB syle!!!! :done:
Biff
10th June 2006, 15:02
Yeah right!
It scared the shit out of me for 300 metres Occifer. Truly!
Arsepurseshun?
:shifty:
Is that what you call it when your g'friend is sitting on front of you on the bike???????:blah:
Not MY girlfriend.........
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