Lord Finn

[Finn]

Yes, you read it right. Just when you thought I couldn’t get any more annoying, I hit you with this. True story. I’ll try to keep it brief.

My father was born in England and moved to Canada after the war and met and married my mother. Proof that I’m not a bastard, but not is all it seems. They moved to NZ where I grew up (actually I just got older) with my 3 brothers. That was it. No other family. My mother was a single child so that ended there but my father had 6 bothers and 1 sister. Most of them resided in South Africa, some in France, the rest in the UK.

Now it gets interesting. At the age of 30, I had never met any of them but began wondering why we had 2 surnames in our family. I also wondered how my Grandfather made so much money when all he was skilled in was horse training. I tried to get some answers but my father was strangely tight lipped about our family history. Well he got cancer last year and subsequently died in Dec but on his way out he threw this one at me.

My Grandfather was the illegitimate son of Lord Thomas Brassey Jnr. His father, Lord Brassey Snr was the famous railway magnate in the 1800’s who built most of the railways throughout the UK, France and a few other European countries. Jnr was the first person to circumnavigate the globe in a steam powered sailing ship, The Sunbeam and even visited NZ in the late 1800’s. He became the Governor of Victoria for a while too.

The story goes that Lord Brassey fancied the maid, shagged her and out poped pops. Grandad went to a private military school, which one would assume, would be out of reach for a commoner like my Great grandmother. He said he was often visited by a man who spoke funny and when he turned 21, he inherited a fortune. My Grandfathers name was Thomas, which was also my father’s middle name.

This explains my uncontrollable fascination with trains, boats and shagging maids. I'm continuing to research this through genealogy sites and it's really interesting.

Now away with you peasants.

Lord Finn.

[Sniper]

Bloody hell.....

[Sniper]

Arthur and his trusty servant Patsy "ride" into a field where peasants are
working. They come up behind a cart which is being dragged by a hunched-over
peasant in ragged clothing. Patsy slows as they near the cart.

Arthur: Old Woman!

The peasant turns around, revealing that he is in fact a man.

Man: Man!
Arthur: Man, sorry.... What knight lives in that castle over there?
Man: I'm thirty-seven!
Arthur: (suprised) What?
Man: I'm thirty-seven! I'm not old--
Arthur: Well I can't just call you "man"...
Man: Well you could say "Dennis"--
Arthur: I didn't know you were called Dennis!
Man: Well, you didn't bother to find out, did you?!
Arthur: I did say sorry about the "old woman", but from behind, you looked--
Man: Well I object to your...you automatically treat me like an inferior!
Arthur: Well I *am* king...
Man: Oh, king, eh, very nice. And 'ow'd you get that, eh?
(he reaches his destination and stops, dropping the cart)
By exploiting the workers! By 'angin' on to outdated imperialist dogma
which perpetuates the economic and social differences in our society.
If there's ever going to be any progress,--
Woman: Dennis! There's some lovely filth down 'ere!
(noticing Arthur) Oh! 'Ow'd'ja do?
Arthur: How do you do, good lady. I am Arthur, king of the Britons. Whose
castle is that?
Woman: King of the 'oo?
Arthur: King of the Britons.
Woman: 'Oo are the Britons?
Arthur: Well we all are! We are all Britons! And I am your king.
Woman: I didn't know we 'ad a king! I thought we were autonomous collective.
Man: (mad) You're fooling yourself! We're living in a dictatorship! A
self-perpetuating autocracy in which the working classes--
Woman: There you go, bringing class into it again...
Man: That's what it's all about! If only people would--
Arthur: Please, *please*, good people, I am in haste! WHO lives in that
castle?
Woman: No one lives there.
Arthur: Then who is your lord?
Woman: We don't have a lord!
Arthur: (spurised) What??
Man: I *told* you! We're an anarcho-syndicalist commune! We're taking
turns to act as a sort of executive-officer-for-the-week--
Arthur: (uninterested) Yes...
Man: But all the decisions *of* that officer 'ave to be ratified at a
special bi-weekly meeting--
Arthur: (perturbed) Yes I see!
Man: By a simple majority, in the case of purely internal affairs--
Arthur: (mad) Be quiet!
Man: But by a two-thirds majority, in the case of more major--
Arthur: (very angry) BE QUIET! I *order* you to be quiet!
Woman: "Order", eh, 'oo does 'e think 'e is?
Arthur: I am your king!
Woman: Well I didn't vote for you!
Arthur: You don't vote for kings!
Woman: Well 'ow'd you become king then?
(holy music up)
Arthur: The Lady of the Lake-- her arm clad in the purest shimmering samite,
held aloft Excalibur from the bosom of the water, signifying by
divine providence that I, Arthur, was to carry Excalibur. THAT is why
I am your king!
Man: (laughingly) Listen: Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords
is no basis for a system of government! Supreme executive power
derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some... farcical
aquatic ceremony!
Arthur: (yelling) BE QUIET!
Man: You can't expect to wield supreme executive power just 'cause some
watery tart threw a sword at you!!
Arthur: (coming forward and grabbing the man) Shut *UP*!
Man: I mean, if I went 'round, saying I was an emperor, just because some
moistened bink had lobbed a scimitar at me, they'd put me away!
Arthur: (throwing the man around) Shut up, will you, SHUT UP!
Man: Aha! Now we see the violence inherent in the system!
Arthur: SHUT UP!
Man: (yelling to all the other workers) Come and see the violence inherent
in the system! HELP, HELP, I'M BEING REPRESSED!
Arthur: (letting go and walking away) Bloody PEASANT!
Man: Oh, what a giveaway! Did'j'hear that, did'j'hear that, eh? That's
what I'm all about! Did you see 'im repressing me? You saw it,
didn't you?!

[Lou Girardin]

That's really interesting Finn.
Slow day at work?
Or have all the receptionists synchronised and are off-limits?

[DemonWolf]

haha good stuff Sniper

[Karma]

Ah... Lord Finn eh...

Well I'm sure if I traced back far enough I could be Baron Weasel :D

[Blackbird]

[QUOTE=Finn] I'm continuing to research this through genealogy sites and it's really interesting.[/ QUOTE]

Hello your Highness. Mrs B is a keen family genealogist and has access to a gazillion of those websites and census CD's etc. Alas, not too many skeletons or otherwise on either side of the family. One of mine was the designer of the Gloster Meteor WW2 jet fighter and Mrs B has a Scot who was apparently an astronomer of note. No maids to shag regrettably. Perhaps you could courier one down???

Yours humbly...

[Sniper]

Im related to Ginger Spice... beat that

[Karma]

Im related to Ginger Spice... beat off

Ginger spice cradled me through my formative years man... but then she got skinny and lost all appeal :(

[Finn]

Or have all the receptionists synchronised and are off-limits?

Divide and conquer! Their performance reviews are spread throughout the year. No problem.

[Krayy]

According to this, the REAL Lord Finn is headed off to the UK
http://www.nzherald.co.nz/section/story.cfm?c_id=1&ObjectID=10387215

[Motu]

And where does the Finn come from? My uncle called my brother Finn all his life...short for John O Finn I presume.We are of Irish decent,but my uncle was Maori.But you are no brother of mine....oh jeez,I hope....

Our family name was found on Charles 1'st death warrant....the change of wind saw said person's body dug up and his bones scattered.I guess we fell from grace and have been paupers ever since.

[Finn]

And where does the Finn come from?

Tis the name of my dog. Wasn't in a very creative mood when I signed up.

[2much]

This explains my uncontrollable fascination with trains, boats and shagging maids.

And dusting, cleaning and general household chores?

[PaddyFZ1]

Im related to Ginger Spice... beat that
Someone on my dads side of the family has a huge family tree, (covers two tennis courts when its all laid out).
Apparantly im related to Richard Nixon (dont know if thats a good thing),and also French Royalty.:nya:

[Finn]

And dusting, cleaning and general household chores?

No, a cleaner does that. SEE, IT'S IN MY BLOOD!!!

[sAsLEX]

Apparantly im related to Richard Nixon (dont know if thats a good thing)

Mussolini over here!

[Finn]

Well I guess we're all related in someway if you go far enough back (except Markauckland) but we're talking direct decendants here.

Lord Finn

[mstriumph]

Someone on my dads side of the family has a huge family tree, (covers two tennis courts when its all laid out).
Apparantly im related to Richard Nixon (dont know if thats a good thing),and also French Royalty.:nya:

but we alllllllllllllllllll have huge family trees, surely? :wait:


marion
[found under gooseberry bush]

[Big Dave]

Ironic that the peer system survives entirely on taxation.

[Finn]

Ironic that the peer system survives entirely on taxation.

I'm related to Helen Clark?

NOOOOOOOOOoooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!

[Lou Girardin]

I'm related to Helen Clark?



Only through sexual fantasy Finn.
You look at that pursed cat's arse mouth of hers and go all submissive, don't you?

[Brett]

I'm related to Helen Clark?

NOOOOOOOOOoooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!

To achieve that you would have to share genes with a horse...i doubt that is achievable...don't worry.

You do realise that under the Feudalistic system of land ownership which you, as a lord, would be under back in the day, that you could parcel off chunks of your land and put us poor sods to work in order for a bit of land and food?
Nice...bloody nice.
As an entreprenuer i would happily figure out how to make money from your new found gains.:blip:

[oldrider]

Look deeper Finn I am sure Tama Iti is in there somewhere too. lol
Did you feel a resemblance when he shook his buttocks on TV? :blip:

[Edbear]

Mmmmmmm! Does the Danish royal family and Lord Earnest Rutherford count?

[Finn]

Look deeper Finn I am sure Tama Iti is in there somewhere too. lol
Did you feel a resemblance when he shook his buttocks on TV? :blip:

Perhaps a resemblance only as a 2 legged mammal with the difference being that millions of years back, my relatives started evolving. His didn't. If you look closely enough you will note that his knuckles are much closer to the ground than mine. The evidence of this is alive today. Each morning I get up early and work hard to feed my family and gather enough food and firewood to last me through the winter. He on the other hand, does nothing and aimlessly wanders the land stealing from everybody else. To make matters worse he has formed a tribe on the pity of pinked skinned Neanderthals that, like him, have noted that it is unfair that some people have better shelter, enough food and ample firewood. Over the years this tribe has increased in numbers to a point that the workers of this land are moving abroad in great numbers to greener pastures. The future looks bleak for this pacific island.

I feel like exercising my right of the motherland and finishing the job on him.

[Lou Girardin]

I particularly liked his claim that the use of guns is a traditional right. apparently they make more noise than beating a hollow log.
I guess tradition is becoming a much shorter term thing these days.
It's just a shame that our predecessors didn't exercise their tradition of firearm use on his a bit more.

[Swoop]

I particularly liked his claim that the use of guns is a traditional right. apparently they make more noise than beating a hollow log.
I guess tradition is becoming a much shorter term thing these days.
It's just a shame that our predecessors didn't exercise their tradition of firearm use on his a bit more.
I'm going to be quite interested in the outcome of that courtcase...

As many others will be also.

[merv]

Hasn't Tame Iti done the country a favour and gone to live in Aus these days living off his artwork or something?

[Skyryder]

Well if he (Tamiti) was an American Indian and shot the Stars and Stripes he'd 'ave been lynched. Nothing traditional about shooting the flag. Now if he'd cut down the flag pole......................he would at least have an argument for his defence. Instead he struts his stuff...............and if it was not for us 'colonials' he'd be a nobody...........................still.

But to the question in hand ie................Blue Bloods etc...............the closest our family got was one of my ancesters fled to from France to Scotland. Seems she was one of Marie Antonettes ladies. Tradition has it she was the chambermaid.................got to empty the Royal Potty.

Skyryder

[froggyfrenchman]

Good one sniper. Its always an apropriate moment to quote monty python

[paturoa]

Aparently some distant relative of mine (blood) was the first new zealander to clear 6 foot in the high jump..... other than that I just pay my taxes, pay tax, pay tax etc etc

[The_Dover]

Lord Finn of Felchington, it's got quite a ring to it.

More tea Jeeves.

[cowpoos]

Lord Finn of Felchington, it's got quite a ring to it.

More tea Jeeves.
what oh bertie.....

[oldrider]

I have just been amusing myself on this rotten cold Southern winters day by reading the July issue of KiwiRider magazine.

Turns to page 42 and wallah, there is a photo that catches my eye.

A FINN plate no less!

Can this be the one and only "Lord" Finn of KB fame! I ask my self?

If only he was smiling I could have confirmed the ID by the bugs on the teeth!

That is the second KB "snake" add I have seen with a distinctly KB personality flavour.

Is this to be a continuing trend and am I now committed to buy KR monthly for more KB revelations? :first:

I will watch that space. :yes: Cheers John.

[skidMark]

Well I guess we're all related in someway if you go far enough back (except Markauckland) but we're talking direct decendants here.

Lord Finn

scuse me?....

[skidMark]

my family tree is boring and shit so ill keep it brief...

my mums cousin is neil fraser (fraser cars)

and my relatives own and operate stebbing recording studios , which my grandfather help found with his brother eldred my grandfather has since passed away and now his brother eldred keeps running it

they are the biggest recording studios in australasia...

thats all lol

see boring life now as you were v

[Finn]

my family tree is boring and shit so ill keep it brief...

my mums cousin is neil fraser (fraser cars)

and my relatives own and operate stebbing recording studios , which my grandfather help found with his brother eldred my grandfather has since passed away and now his brother eldred keeps running it

they are the biggest recording studios in australasia...

thats all lol

see boring life now as you were v

So how are Vaughn, Robin & family?

[Edbear]

So how are Vaughn, Robin & family?



Name dropper...!:innocent: