First Post - Things I have Learned

[ishkur]

G'day All
... I have been lurking on this site for a couple of years and despite dispensing a couple of Private Messages to people, have never Posted !!!
I thought I might share some things that I have learned from my time here ... purely for the benefit of new members coming on board.


1: Under no circumstances: Start a new Thread on Lane Splitting .......... use the Search function

2: Under no circumstances: Start a new Thread on Use of Bus Lanes .. use the Search function

3: Under no circumstances: Start a new Thread on Bike Insurance ........ use the Search function

4: Under no circumstances: Start a new Thread on Tyres .......................... use the Search function

5: After you have trolled through the 1000s of Threads resulting from your search ... desperately hunting for the simple yes/no answer you want .... Then you may start a new Thread asking your question. But be warned, the first response will be from someone advising you to use the search function.

6: Be Warned: Any Thread of more than 5 pages, has generally degenerated to:

xxxx: "well in my opinion, cagers are the root of all evil and should be wiped out"
yyyy: "Hey!!! xxxx!!! haven't heard from your for ages!! how are ya mate???"
xxxx: " Oh man .... its so good, we went out Fri nite and got so munted!! where were you"
yyyy: " Oh you know ... had that other thing to go to, hows your sister"
etc etc etc

(Oh ....and don't worry about using PM for things like this ... all 4000+ Kiwibike members are interested in reading that kind of post)

7: Be Warned: Any Thread of more than 7 pages, has generally degenerated to:

xxxx: " .... and when I say I'm right, thats all there is too it"
zzzz: " well ... I think your an asshole"
xxxx: " screw you zzzz"
zzzz: " up yours xxxx"
etc etc etc

8: Your opinions are meaningless here, until you have made at least .... 240posts. Until then you have no "Site Presence", you may be welcomed, but will be mostly disregared.

9: Whenever any Discussion Thread does degenerate into an arguement, the person with the highest post count wins. Regardless. right or wrong, it doesn't matter. If, for example: You are a motorcyle mechanic with 20years experience explaining how to dismantle the top end but you have less than 100posts to your credit ... and the uninformed moron your debating with has over 1000posts ... he is right, sorry. Highest post count wins.

10: If people of comparable post counts are debating, the one with the most Green Rep wins.

11: Green Rep can be dispensed freely ... and for anything ...

12: Red Rep can only be dispensed after hours of agonising and sleepless nights, and be prepared to fight bitterly to defend the red rep you dispense.

13: Threads full of misery and carnage will always be met with sympathy and offers of assistance

14: Threads of 'happy' stories with shiny paintwork, dry roads and blue skies will be met with groans of envy and/or congratulations


Bottom Line: Bloody Awesome Website, full of Great People and Interesting Information.

I will quietly go back to Lurk mode now .....

[Mr. Peanut]

Welcome to the site. :whocares:

[MSTRS]

.....
8: Your opinions are meaningless here, until you have made at least .... 240posts. Until then you have no "Site Presence", you may be welcomed, but will be mostly disregarded. .....
With a post count of less than 2, anything you said is utter tripe with no relevance. I'm ignoring you for now...:innocent:
ps - good on you, astute observations. Think it will make any difference tho?

[DemonWolf]

Hahaa.. funny stuff Welcome to the Site ishkur - Hope you keen enjoying yourself here.

[crashe]

Welcome to KB...:scooter:

Thats the best laugh I have had for ages...


Righto no more lurking now that you have posted.

A challenge is now being set you must post heaps now to out do Sniper (10,000 + posts).
So get posting drivel and crap..............

(I'm not saying thats all Sniper ever posts - He does post some great stuff)

[Paul in NZ]

Welcome to the site - great 1st post..

Where you been? Wanna go out and crash some bikes, talk about whales, give me your sisters number, get munted, argue about tyres, bitch about cages?

I forget anything?

oh yeah, cops are all bad men, um, Helen Clarke is awful, um.. nope, thats about it I think.. ;-)

Anyway - you nailed it so well done..

[kickingzebra]

Good calls!!

You shouldn't however forget carefully wording everything to appeal to the common denominator, in the search for green rep.

Also, to gain rep, it is my observation that one must be contentious. No one cares for laissez fare...

[Swoop]

Was there any mention of beer???...:blip:

Welcome along to the site, and a great first post as well!
Get out of lurk mode though!

[HDTboy]

Good shit, you forgot to mention the porn though

[Matt Bleck]

I have no idea what your on about.....

[TerminalAddict]

now that's some good shit.
and as a person with less than 240 posts .. I can certainly second the notion of "who posts, wins" :)

[Mental Trousers]

I like this person.

[TerminalAddict]

holy shit .. that was my 241th post !!!!!
yay ! My life is worth living now :D

*242 and counting*

[kiwifruit]

Spiffing post, welcome :)

[terbang]

Hang on while I do a search for that..!
Welcome

[MSTRS]

15. Coming under the scrutiny of the BDOTGNZA and adherence to KBisms

[Lazy7]

haha.

so who are you really?

[Lazy7]

wow - i stand corrected. you have been lurking since march 2005. that is a solid effort.

[cowpoos]

G'day All
... I have been lurking on this site for a couple of years and despite dispensing a couple of Private Messages to people, have never Posted !!!
I thought I might share some things that I have learned from my time here ... purely for the benefit of new members coming on board.


1: Under no circumstances: Start a new Thread on Lane Splitting .......... use the Search function

2: Under no circumstances: Start a new Thread on Use of Bus Lanes .. use the Search function

3: Under no circumstances: Start a new Thread on Bike Insurance ........ use the Search function

4: Under no circumstances: Start a new Thread on Tyres .......................... use the Search function

5: After you have trolled through the 1000s of Threads resulting from your search ... desperately hunting for the simple yes/no answer you want .... Then you may start a new Thread asking your question. But be warned, the first response will be from someone advising you to use the search function.

6: Be Warned: Any Thread of more than 5 pages, has generally degenerated to:

xxxx: "well in my opinion, cagers are the root of all evil and should be wiped out"
yyyy: "Hey!!! xxxx!!! haven't heard from your for ages!! how are ya mate???"
xxxx: " Oh man .... its so good, we went out Fri nite and got so munted!! where were you"
yyyy: " Oh you know ... had that other thing to go to, hows your sister"
etc etc etc

(Oh ....and don't worry about using PM for things like this ... all 4000+ Kiwibike members are interested in reading that kind of post)

7: Be Warned: Any Thread of more than 7 pages, has generally degenerated to:

xxxx: " .... and when I say I'm right, thats all there is too it"
zzzz: " well ... I think your an asshole"
xxxx: " screw you zzzz"
zzzz: " up yours xxxx"
etc etc etc

8: Your opinions are meaningless here, until you have made at least .... 240posts. Until then you have no "Site Presence", you may be welcomed, but will be mostly disregared.

9: Whenever any Discussion Thread does degenerate into an arguement, the person with the highest post count wins. Regardless. right or wrong, it doesn't matter. If, for example: You are a motorcyle mechanic with 20years experience explaining how to dismantle the top end but you have less than 100posts to your credit ... and the uninformed moron your debating with has over 1000posts ... he is right, sorry. Highest post count wins.

10: If people of comparable post counts are debating, the one with the most Green Rep wins.

11: Green Rep can be dispensed freely ... and for anything ...

12: Red Rep can only be dispensed after hours of agonising and sleepless nights, and be prepared to fight bitterly to defend the red rep you dispense.

13: Threads full of misery and carnage will always be met with sympathy and offers of assistance

14: Threads of 'happy' stories with shiny paintwork, dry roads and blue skies will be met with groans of envy and/or congratulations


Bottom Line: Bloody Awesome Website, full of Great People and Interesting Information.

I will quietly go back to Lurk mode now .....
haha....I like you.....post more

[Biohazard]

Spot on mate - very good post, dont you dare go back in lurk mode - keep up the good work

[WickedOne]

Good post!!! Welcome to the madhouse... :blip:

[ManDownUnder]

Welcome along (or into the light anyway...)

Bloody lurker LMAO... succinct and accurate post though. Right on the money

[Oakie]

Welcome. Now don't be shy.

[Edbear]

Well done for a first post, however I think you cheated a bit by having been a sneaky voyeur for so long!:first:

[Hitcher]

Hah! You have indeed been watching us. I dispute the "240 post" threshold for credibility. I, for one, judge folks on the quality of their contributions. Yes, even Sniper...

[Scorpygirl]

Your powers of observation are spot on mate!!!! :yes: That was a great laugh!!! Although I got accepted (?) way before the 200 + post. Welcome to KB finally.:doobey:

[Hitcher]

15. Coming under the scrutiny of the BDOTGNZA and adherence to KBisms
Yeah! Stick that in your gargre!

[MD]

Observant bugger aren't you! Good call though. Enjoyed that read.
So what tyres are you running so we can abuse your choice. And where you been lately, what beer you drink, and do you lane split or use bus lanes. Oh yeah what insurance do you have and... lets see what can we catch you out on?
Hope it doesn't take a year for you to respond with your second post?
Pity any KBer who meets you at a cafe 'hey what's you name Bud'?"..8 weeks later "Ïshkur" Many coffees must go cold during your conversations.
Welcome.

[Her_C4]

Awesome post (and very astute!) :rockon:

Looking forward to reading your next one :blip:

[Scorpygirl]

Thats because you have a vagina.



Your powers of observation astound me SM!!!!!! :blip: :blah:

[Edbear]

Your powers of observation astound me SM!!!!!! :blip: :blah:



It's his medical training...:wait:

[NhuanH]

Well done ishkur :clap: A very perceptive and entertaining first post. If only others were as considered about their "pearls of wisdom" in this little domain of cyberspace.
Welcome to the mad house, but it seems you've got the pulse of the place already!

You did miss this though:
Respect tha Jandal and it shall respect you.

[sels1]

Great first post - welcome aboard. So now we are waiting to see what your next posts are like......(no pressure or anything....:) )

[Maha]

Some first post's read like they the person are at their first 'AA' meeting...:drinkup:
What you said about threads, is very true, if you post on the thread title in the 6th-7th page, then the next post says 'what's he on about'?....:confused:
Top write up ishkur............:first:

[Maha]

What about..........'' thats a repost '' response?
Always from someone who has way to much time on their hands.....:wait:
Not everyone has seen everything, well Sniper has, but thats another story....:blip:

[Sniper]

I have just seen this thread. Damn great work of art, well done mate.

EDIT: I will not comment on the post count thingie.


A challenge is now being set you must post heaps now to out do Sniper (10,000 + posts).
Its now 11k, but post count has lost its shine for me now.

[Storm]

I like this person.

Im with him. Might not have the posts, but by hell he knows whats goin' on round here doesnt he

[chanceyy]

well observed .. damn Dover/finn/poos/inline etc would hate to be so well pinged by a lurker .. awesome first post .. keep it up .. bling awarded

[Storm]

Its now 11k, but post count has lost its shine for me now.

Yeah, these days its seeing how many times each day you can call "repost"
Must be getting a fair old tally too :bleh:

[Sniper]

Yeah, these days its seeing how many times each day you can call "repost"
Must be getting a fair old tally too :bleh:

Actually, the repost yells are getting a bit thin on the ground now too. I think I have said repost 3 times in the past 3 weeks.

[Storm]

Mans gotta have a hobby I spose, be it the BDOTGNZA or reposts :)

[marty]

Actually, the repost yells are getting a bit thin on the ground now too. I think I have said repost 3 times in the past 3 weeks.

actually it's 3 times today, 5 times since mid june, 22 times since march.... :)

[Sniper]

actually it's 3 times today, 5 times since mid june, 22 times since march.... :)

How could you keep count :nya:

[Hitcher]

One post, three green bling lights, and never heard from again. The Devo of Kiwi Biker...

[Hitcher]

Mans gotta have a hobby I spose, be it the BDOTGNZA or reposts
The BDOTGNZA isn't a "hobby". It's a calling.

[marty]

it's called the search function sniper dude. what are you, a newbie? :)

[Sniper]

it's called the search function sniper dude. what are you, a newbie? :)
You cant know that, Im right, I have a high post count!

(pt)

[Squeak the Rat]

He is accurate isn't he... :)

6: Be Warned: Any Thread of more than 5 pages, has generally degenerated to:

xxxx: "The BDOTGNZA isn't a "hobby". It's a calling."
yyyy: "it's called the search function sniper dude. what are you, a newbie?"
xxxx: " You cant know that, Im right, I have a high post count!"
zzzz: He is accurate isn't he... :)
6: Be Warned: Any Thread of more than 5 pages, has generally degenerated to:

xxxx: "The BDOTGNZA isn't a "hobby". It's a calling."
yyyy: "it's called the search function sniper dude. what are you, a newbie?"
xxxx: " You cant know that, Im right, I have a high post count!"
zzzz: He is accurate isn't he... :)etc. etc.

[MidnightMike]

(Oh ....and don't worry about using PM for things like this ... all 4000+ Kiwibike members are interested in reading that kind of post)

Dude, Its KIWIBIKER!!! :nono:

And its nearly 5 pages so we have to start talking bout how we got pissed on friday and how cagers are evil, who's first ????

[Storm]

I was referring to the "reposts" The BDOTGNZA is a holy war on American stupidty. Lead us forth, brave General Hitcher !!!

[Sniper]

I was referring to the "reposts"
Does BDOTGNZA have a repost police squad?

At one stage I tried to help out the BDOTGNZA, but now my spelling and punctuation had deteriorated dramatically and I fear severe repercussions from the brave general

[Hitcher]

Does BDOTGNZA have a repost police squad?
No it does not. Unless the repost constitutes a heinous crime against the English language. Up with that the BDOTGNZA will not put!

[Sniper]

Up with that the BDOTGNZA will not put!

That particular sentance worries me. Does it imply that the BDOTGNZA has a working relationship with those who speak english but use the words in different sentance structures with the same meaning?

[Macktheknife]

OH GOD, its happening, just like he predicted.... almost 5 pages and the drivel is showing! lol
We must worship him and ask for his guidance in all things.
He is the all knowing, all seeing.... the great LURKER!


Great post, I would say welcome but it is too late already.

[placidfemme]

welcome to the site and yeah... great first post (i'm a bit slow)...

[Sniper]

OH GOD, its happening, just like he predicted.... almost 5 pages and the drivel is showing! lol
We must worship him and ask for his guidance in all things.
He is the all knowing, all seeing.... the great LURKER!


Great post, I would say welcome but it is too late already.

Come-on. Couple more pages and people can start abusing me....