The_Dover
26th July 2006, 10:23
1. When she asks how she looks, shrug and say "could be better" this
will keep her on her toes and girls love that.
2. Never hold her hand this can be interpreted as a sign of weakness
(or if she grabs your hand squeeze hers really really hard until she cries.
this will impress her by showing her what a strong man you are.)
3. Once a month sneak up on her from behind and knock her over girls
are like dogs they love to be roughed up.
4. Call her in the middle of the night to ask if she's sleeping. If
she is say you better be, repeat this 4 or 5 times until morning, this will
show her you care.
5. When she is upset about something, suggest to her that it might
be her fault, this will pave the way for her own personal improvement and
every girl needs some improvement.
6. Recognize the small things, they usually mean the most. Then
when she's sleeping, steal all her small things and break them because
jewellery is for pussies.
7. If you're talking to another girl, make sure she's looking. When
she is, stare into her eyes mouth the words **** you and grab the other
girls a.ss. Girls love competition.
8. Tell her you're taking her out to dinner. Drive for miles so she
thinks it's going to be really special. Then take her to a burning tire
yard. When she starts to get upset tell her you were just kidding and now
you're really going to take her to dinner. Then drive her home. When she
starts crying and asks why you would do something like that lean over and
whisper very quietly into her ear "...because I can."
9. Introduce her to your friends as "some chick". Women love those
special nicknames.
10. Play with her hair. Play with it HARD.
11. Warm her up when she's cold but not by giving her your jacket because
then you might get cold. Rather, look her in the eye and say "if you don't
stop b.itching about the cold right now you're going to be b.itching about a
black eye." the best way to get warm is with fear.
12. Take her to a party. When you get there she'll have to go to the
bathroom (they always do). Leave immediately. Come back right when the
party's dying and yell at her the whole way home for ditching you at the
party.
13. Make her laugh. A good way to do this is if she has a small pet. Kick
the pet. I always find stuff like that funny why shouldn't girls?
14. Let her fall asleep in your arms. When she's fast asleep, wait 10
minutes then JUMP UP AND SCREAM IN HER EAR! Repeat until she goes home and
you can use your arms for more important things, like backyard cricket.
15. Spit often. I hear girls like guys that spit.
16. If you care about her never ever tell her. This will only give her
self-confidence. Then you can never turn her into the object she deep down
desires to be.
17. Every time you're in her house steal one of the following: shoes,
earrings, or anything else that comes in pairs. Only take one of the pair.
This way she'll go crazy.
18. Take her out to dinner. Right when she's about to order interrupt and
say no she's not hungry and make her watch you eat. Girls love a guy that
speaks for her.
19. Look her in the eyes and smile. Then clock her one. Girls love a
spontaneous guy.
20. Give her one of your t-shirts and make sure it has your smell on it.
But not a sexy cologne smell, a bad smell, you know what I'm talking about.
21. When its raining keep asking her if she's crying. She'll say no it's
just the rain. Ten minutes later turn to her and scream at her to stop
crying you **** baby. Girls like a tough man as I've already stated.
22. Titty twisters and plenty of them.
23. If you're listening to music, and she asks to hear it, tell her no. This
way she'll think you're mysterious.
24. Remember her birthday but don't get her something. Teach her material
objects aren't important. The only thing that's important is that she keeps
you happy. And your happiness is the greatest present she can ever get.
25. When she gives you a present on your birthday, Christmas, or just
whenever, take it and tell her you love it. Then next time you know she's
coming over on a trash day leave the trashcan open and have the present
visibly sticking out of the can. Girls actually don't like this one that
much but I think it's funny.
26. If she's mad at you for not calling her when you say you will promise
her that you will call her at a certain time of the day. This will make sure
that she waits by the phone. Tell her when you call you're going to tell her
a special surprise. Now she'll be really excited. Now don't call.
will keep her on her toes and girls love that.
2. Never hold her hand this can be interpreted as a sign of weakness
(or if she grabs your hand squeeze hers really really hard until she cries.
this will impress her by showing her what a strong man you are.)
3. Once a month sneak up on her from behind and knock her over girls
are like dogs they love to be roughed up.
4. Call her in the middle of the night to ask if she's sleeping. If
she is say you better be, repeat this 4 or 5 times until morning, this will
show her you care.
5. When she is upset about something, suggest to her that it might
be her fault, this will pave the way for her own personal improvement and
every girl needs some improvement.
6. Recognize the small things, they usually mean the most. Then
when she's sleeping, steal all her small things and break them because
jewellery is for pussies.
7. If you're talking to another girl, make sure she's looking. When
she is, stare into her eyes mouth the words **** you and grab the other
girls a.ss. Girls love competition.
8. Tell her you're taking her out to dinner. Drive for miles so she
thinks it's going to be really special. Then take her to a burning tire
yard. When she starts to get upset tell her you were just kidding and now
you're really going to take her to dinner. Then drive her home. When she
starts crying and asks why you would do something like that lean over and
whisper very quietly into her ear "...because I can."
9. Introduce her to your friends as "some chick". Women love those
special nicknames.
10. Play with her hair. Play with it HARD.
11. Warm her up when she's cold but not by giving her your jacket because
then you might get cold. Rather, look her in the eye and say "if you don't
stop b.itching about the cold right now you're going to be b.itching about a
black eye." the best way to get warm is with fear.
12. Take her to a party. When you get there she'll have to go to the
bathroom (they always do). Leave immediately. Come back right when the
party's dying and yell at her the whole way home for ditching you at the
party.
13. Make her laugh. A good way to do this is if she has a small pet. Kick
the pet. I always find stuff like that funny why shouldn't girls?
14. Let her fall asleep in your arms. When she's fast asleep, wait 10
minutes then JUMP UP AND SCREAM IN HER EAR! Repeat until she goes home and
you can use your arms for more important things, like backyard cricket.
15. Spit often. I hear girls like guys that spit.
16. If you care about her never ever tell her. This will only give her
self-confidence. Then you can never turn her into the object she deep down
desires to be.
17. Every time you're in her house steal one of the following: shoes,
earrings, or anything else that comes in pairs. Only take one of the pair.
This way she'll go crazy.
18. Take her out to dinner. Right when she's about to order interrupt and
say no she's not hungry and make her watch you eat. Girls love a guy that
speaks for her.
19. Look her in the eyes and smile. Then clock her one. Girls love a
spontaneous guy.
20. Give her one of your t-shirts and make sure it has your smell on it.
But not a sexy cologne smell, a bad smell, you know what I'm talking about.
21. When its raining keep asking her if she's crying. She'll say no it's
just the rain. Ten minutes later turn to her and scream at her to stop
crying you **** baby. Girls like a tough man as I've already stated.
22. Titty twisters and plenty of them.
23. If you're listening to music, and she asks to hear it, tell her no. This
way she'll think you're mysterious.
24. Remember her birthday but don't get her something. Teach her material
objects aren't important. The only thing that's important is that she keeps
you happy. And your happiness is the greatest present she can ever get.
25. When she gives you a present on your birthday, Christmas, or just
whenever, take it and tell her you love it. Then next time you know she's
coming over on a trash day leave the trashcan open and have the present
visibly sticking out of the can. Girls actually don't like this one that
much but I think it's funny.
26. If she's mad at you for not calling her when you say you will promise
her that you will call her at a certain time of the day. This will make sure
that she waits by the phone. Tell her when you call you're going to tell her
a special surprise. Now she'll be really excited. Now don't call.