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S&S
14th September 2006, 12:40
A man with a bald head and a wooden leg is invited to a fancy dress party.
He doesn't know what to wear to hide his head and his wooden leg, so he writes to a fancy dress company to explain his problem.

A few days later he receives a parcel with a note:

"Dear Sir, Please find enclosed a pirate's outfit. The spotted handkerchief will
cover your bald head and with your wooden leg you will be just right as a
pirate."

The man thinks this is terrible because they have just emphasized his wooden
leg, so he writes a letter of complaint.

A week passes and he received another parcel and note:

"Dear Sir, Sorry about the previous parcel. Please find enclosed a monk's habit. The long robe will cover your wooden leg and with your bald head you will really look the part".

The man is really furious now, because the company has gone from emphasizing his wooden leg to drawing attention to his bald head.

Sooo he writes a really rude letter of complaint. A few days later he gets a very small parcel from the company with the accompanying letter:

"Dear Sir,Please find enclosed a tin of Golden Syrup. Pour the tin of Golden Syrup over your bald head, stick your wooden leg up your arse and go as a f*cking toffee apple"

stunz
14th September 2006, 12:43
hahahaha ahgahaha hahhahahaha hahahahahaha hahashahahahaha










hahahaha ahhahahahahah ahahahahah ah ahahahahaha ahahahahahaha

nice one

placidfemme
14th September 2006, 12:47
lol very good :)

SARGE
14th September 2006, 12:48
sounds like the same pack of dickheads i dealt with...


they sent me a sheepskin and a baseball bat and told me to go as a FUCKING CYCLOPS!!!

Macktheknife
14th September 2006, 15:51
sounds like the same pack of dickheads i dealt with...


they sent me a sheepskin and a baseball bat and told me to go as a FUCKING CYCLOPS!!!

And???...... Sounds like a perfectly reasonable suggestion to me. Ugly as sin, mean tempered, big stick to hit people with.
Oh wait, you're supposed to be in some kind of disguise right?? lol

SARGE
14th September 2006, 15:56
And???...... Sounds like a perfectly reasonable suggestion to me. Ugly as sin, mean tempered, big stick to hit people with.
Oh wait, you're supposed to be in some kind of disguise right?? lol

you dont have many mirrors round your place huh?

Macktheknife
14th September 2006, 16:09
you dont have many mirrors round your place huh?

I'm not allowed mirrors anymore, the doctors took them all away, even the plastic ones. I still get asked to parties tho, usually around end of October, I'm not sure why.
But I still get regular visits from my girlfriend, every week on tuesdays between 10.00am and 10.50am, she brings me presents :love: and makes me eat them. She never shows any affection tho, apparently thats not allowed.
*sigh*
The music is nice too, drowns out the voices.