Scariest moment.... What about the funniest moment ?

[orange dog]

I'm sure theres plenty out there !

One of mine would be running out of petrol 50m short of a garage with a girlfriend (her riding her own own bike). Flattened the battery trying to get new fuel through and had to spend 10 minutes trying to jump start the bike. Engine finally caught and probably through lack of oxygen to the brain (and any chance to impress the girl), decided to pull a wheely across the forecourt which of course turned to shit when the front wheel came down on a steel cover and went off in a different direction to the bike. Layed there laughing my ass off (probably to cover wounded ego) until I noticed the attendent getting on to the blower... whoops, time to go.

Also, out riding with a mate on his first bike on his first day out, going through some twisty's with me following, he pulled out to pass (max 90 km) a car and instead of pulling back into the middle of his lane, he kept pulling over to the left, off the road, into the ditch and up the bank.
Driver of the passed car stopped and got out to check, found two guys in leathers laughing our asses off, quickly got back in and buggered off.

Hmmm maybe we use laughter to cover bruised ego's or maybe bikers just have a better sense of humour ?:laugh:

[Panther]

one time a few years ago before i had my own bikes i was getting pillioned out west quite late at night, i mean it was dark, and all of a sudden we were stopping quite randomly on the main road. i had no idea what was going on. i was told to get off and start walking thata way and next thing the biker is running past with the bike in tow! the poor rider bashfully admited a couple of hundred meters down the road at the gas station that the gas light had been on for 50kms!

[R6_kid]

Was sitting at the lights on the way to the gym one morning on my 1976 Vespa Super 150. 'boy racer' type pulls up next to me so i thought I'd have a laugh. Started revving my little two stroke (much to his amusement), to which he replied by revving the nuts out of his car. Unfortunately for me when the light went green i wasn't thinking, dropped the clutch just be low rev-limit...

Front goes skywards, numberplate bends up as it is dragged along the ground and becomes a makeshift 12-bar, clutch in, 2nd gear, throttle still pinned open, front goes skywards again... im shitting myself... he's shitting himself laughing.

For the rest of the time i had the scooter the number plate was held on by cable ties.

[Oakie]

Nothing really comes to mind for me while riding but I nearly pissed myself one day a couple of summers ago as a pedestrian watching a young lady on a scooter with her white cotton dress flying up in her face and giving us pedestians a great old display of underwear.

[BNZ]

Had a few drunken moments down at the beach.... One night heading to a party on the back of a 70cc scooter with driver and I in hardly-can-walk-mode we decided to remove all the cones from a section of footpath that had been removed. On our ride home of course we plowed into the hole where the cones had been marking....

Another time involved me drunk on a CRF50 turning up at the wrong house for a party and riding down the hallway into the kitchen. The owners were suprisingly accomodating. :innocent:

[SpinFx]

The funniest moment I remember was watching my dad show off on my gsx400, he was doing a burn out up against the house. He slipped and sat down quickly on the seat then wheelied up the side of the hose and canned off in front of all my mates. I guess you had to be there.

[T.I.E]

pulled up to the asb in orewa, saw two attractive gilrs walking towards me, trying to look cool i hoped off the bike in my gear ready to strike a pose when halfway through i realised i forgot to put the side stand down. bike and myself fell to the ground, ladies were nice stopped and asked if i needed to help, "no im ok" as i righted the bike and headed off with my tails between my legs to find another bank.


panmure roundabout, large roundabout, decided to hoon through the inside, corning hard and during rush hour the chain decidess to fall off locked up the rear and left me stuck in the middle. pulled the bike onto the island pulled the tools out fixed it all up. and all on a hot day, due to imbarassment i never removed my helmet through the whole process.

i have no shame

[kevfromcoro]

was in takapuna ..had a pillion.on the back..came up to a red light.said do u mind putting your feet down to steedy the bike...dumped the clutch.and left him standing in the middle of the intersection.went back and picked him up..was not happy

[paturoa]

1 - ex gf was being a nutter with her brother as pillion. He couldn't get her to slow down by yelling at her so he reaches around and grabs a couple of handfulls of his sisters tits!. She said if it was me she wouldn't have slowed down but did for her brother! Never got to test that one.

2- Neasville going up a wickedly steep track I endo'ed the KDX and it lands on top of my helmit, with me on the downhill side. I didn't know it at the time but it was caught up on some roots so I couldn't move it. I spent about 5 minutes trying to extract myself while my "buddies" stood around watching and laughing.

3 - following my brother one day, he was on my GSX750ex, I was on his H2 750. He had a full face helmit but no visor. Anyway we are going along a straight road at "some" speed and all of sudden he starts to slow down and wobble all over the road. He pulls to a stop and manages to get the side stand down before rolling off into the ditch. I did a u turn and went back. When I got there all I could see was snot, dribble and various other body fluids, all over his face. He had his helmit off by then. You've all heard the old joke about "whats the last thing that goes thru a bee's mind as it hits your windscreen at 100kmph?" - "Its arse" boom boom. Well in this case it was my brother's eye ball. The stinger was still in the white bit, so I made a little loop out of hair (I used to have some back then!), tied a loop and pulled it out. It didn't seem that funny at the time, especially to him, but we have a good laught about it now-a-days. He couldn't see out of it for a few days as the whole lot swelled up some much he couldn't open it.

[Shadows]

Would have to be back when I was about 17 or 18, you know, that age when you are ten foot tall and bullet proof. I was pissed out of my tree and leaving a party. I fell off my stationary bike three times (I think, maybe more) before finally hanging on to it and getting going, only to run out of gas 50 metres down the road, much to the amusement of everybody looking on. Looking back it was probably a good thing that it did run out though, it was funny at the time, even if I did put a dent in the tank - but it doesn't seem quite so funny now that I have nurtured my remaining brain cell to maturity.

The other, more recent time would be when I thundered into work one weekend, straight into the covered walkway outside my office where I intended to park, only to have my front wheel slip on some wet/greasy concrete as I was stopping. I put my foot down, that slipped as well and I ended up "gently placing" my bike down on its side in front of a dozen or so of the workers I was supposed to be supervising that day. I don't think I've quite lived that one down yet, but at least my bike came out of it unscathed even if my pride didn't.

[slopster]

When I'd just gotten my first bike a gsxr 250 I went and showed it to my mates and they wanted to see a burnout. Got it going a bit with the front wheel locked and the rear one spinning then it took off and I put my right hand into a lampost at about 10 kays. The lampost jambed my fingers on the brake and my hand was stuck on the throttle skidding it up and bouncing off the rev limiter. Took about 10 seconds till I rememberd the kill switch.

[dnos]

We were playing around on bikes at my nana's farm after the paddocks flooded, having a great time hooning through a massive puddle and doing burnouts.
My Uncle was playing photographer and decided to get a front on shot of my cousin riding the quad through the puddle. I bet you can guess what happened next.
She rode straight into him as he tryed to dive out of the way, apparently she was shutting her eyes because of all the spray!!!! :ride:
So as hes lying on his back in pain we run over to see if hes ok, and my other uncle cains up on his motocross bike, stops on the camera, and sez "you allright?"
Was scary to watch but of course hillarious later, he was gutted about the camera, never did get to see that action shot. Oh well.

[R6_kid]

just got reminded of another one...

Had a friend on her ZXR following me home one day, we would normally cause shit on our bikes but this time my bike was out of action so i had the old mans volvo. We pulled up at an intersection, me on the right, a 4x4 on the left and her on her ZXR in between me and the 4x4.

The 4x4 had a few teenage boys in it, for some reason the ZXR girl decides it'd be a laugh to flick my windscreen washers up... she then sees the drink bottle sitting in the passenger seat, as we had been talking the window was down so she reached in and grabbed it and did her best to squirt me with it.

I got the better of her, got the bottle, took the top off the bottle and started soaking her.

The guys in the truck were sitting there staring at us with the most hilarious WTF look on their faces... they didnt have a clue what was going on and as far as they knew we were two random road users having an impromtu water fight, and she was a very random biker that liked to tamper with vehichles at traffic lights and cause as much trouble as possible.

[Beemer]

Okay, I'll play!

I bought my first bike a week before Christmas and was taking it out around the block for a little ride on Christmas Day when I forgot to put a foot down at the traffic lights (it was a cow of a thing to get into neutral) and dropped it. That was funny enough, but the guy who jumped out his car to help was wearing a Santa hat! I was so embarrassed I kept my visor down but I've never forgotten him - and I bet he was more embarrassed than me when his grandmother in the front seat reminded him he was still wearing the hat when he got out!

[judecatmad]

I was on holiday with one of my mates and we hired this little scooter to go blatting around the island (Zakynthos).

We were getting used to the thing - I took first go at driving and she was on the back. Got confused as to which hand controlled the throttle and ended halfway up a large pile of sand at the side of the road, with Kay having fallen off the back! :rofl:

I nearly wet myself laughing, she was less than impressed! :mad:

We had a great time on that scooter that day - racing other scooters, enjoying the cool breeze as we tootled along... Tell you what tho, after pillioning for an hour or so...maaan, hard to walk!!! (the back of scooter seats are really wide!!!)

[vifferman]

I've had a few 'experiences' that are funny only in hindsight.

Like dropping the bike I was test-riding (the first bike I bought) in the flower garden of the lady who owned it.

Like doing a magnificent feet-up powerslide in the gravel around the back of the shop I worked up after school. I parked the bike, and took my helmet off, and copped an earful from the manager of the furniture shop that backed onto the shop I worked at. It was a very hot day and he'd opened the back door of his shop to let some air flow through. And the big dust cloud I'd made....:o

When I worked on a farm, I had to retrieve a dead sheep from the paddock we were working in, by myself. The gate was at the upper end of the paddock, the sheep was at the lower end. It was my first time using the bike trailer, and I had a real struggle getting traction and/or keeping the front wheel of the bike on the ground. In the end, I got off, and walked beside the bike, dropping it several times, losing the sheep off the back of the trailer several times, and getting top-dressed by the plane that was scheduled to spread super phosphate in that area. D'Oh!!
Later, I learned that it was easier to just tie dead sheep to the towbar by one leg, and drag them along the ground. Usually that worked (if I didn't ride too hard and rip the leg off...)

Another time on the farm, I managed to drop the bike against the electric fence....

My most recent misadventure is still too recent to be funny. I was late going home, and decided that because the truck I was stuck behind was taking up too much of the lane to overtake safely, I'd go up the inside. Unfortunately, it started to move, and I decided to "play it safe" and not risk getting jammed between it and the kerb. So I went up the (handily placed) gap in the kerb and onto the footpath. Unfortunately, the slight braking/turning manouevre I had to make was on the damp grass verge, and not having knobbly tyres the front end didn't wish to comply. I ended up dropping the bike and did a faceplant onto the footpath in front of the stationary commuters and the people at the nearby service station.:o

Why does that always happen? :spudwhat:
The 'incident' prior to that involved doing a faceplant in front of road workers.

Luckily no-one saw some of my other oopsies, like when I was 17 pulling a nice wheelie up the drive at home, then realising I'd accelerated too much, backing off the gas, braking hard, and sliding the bike through the carport on its side and into the back wall.

[avgas]

Girlfriend falling asleep on the back of the GB after a hard day riding and her grip around me got loose.. Scared the shit out of me cos i could feel her there anymore.
Scary and funny at the same time i was most confused.

[orange dog]

Girlfriend falling asleep on the back of the GB after a hard day riding and her grip around me got loose.. Scared the shit out of me cos i could feel her there anymore.
Scary and funny at the same time i was most confused.

Used to have a girlfriend who would fall asleep after 5 mins of getting on the bike ! had to lean way forward and use the elbows to keep her on. Best part was being able to ride down the road having a good yell at her without getting biffed... only way i could win any arguments :zzzz:

She didn't last long

[avgas]

Used to have a girlfriend who would fall asleep after 5 mins of getting on the bike !
Yeh well thats the prob with big singles, they just make a nice mellow hum when your doing 140 on the motorway @ 2am.

[Jimmy B]

Good morning all,

Years ago I was lucky to have procured a newish RM250, it was a handful and I loved it. Reminded me a bit of Han Solo’s millennium falcon….nothing…nothing… then holy crap, hyperspace as the scenery merged into a distant pin point. One of my buddies at the time asked if we could take it for a spin down by the river (same spot as my accidental no bike superman):

http://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/showthread.php?p=972961#post972961

“No problems Dude have you ridden a bit”

”Heaps” was the reply so we made haste.

I rode around for 10 minutes like a loony to get the sucker warmed up then stopped for the change over. Inevitably, the first attempt from my mate resulted in a stall for about 2 feet travelled.

“You’re gonna have to give it a bit more and whatever you do make sure you let the clutch out slowly”

Kickstart….Stall….

“Bit more, but remember the clutch”

What transpired was the biggest rooster tail, 270 degree highside from a standing start that I have ever seen. Carved out over an arc of about 30 feet, it was over before the dust had a chance to settle.

“You ok”?

“Yep, hurts a bit”

“Wanna go again?”

Nup, she’s right, let’s go home for a beer”

“OK”

Not normally one to laugh at other people’s expense but, that was one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen. Lucky the rear didn’t hook up or he would’ve worn that Suzuki like a hat.