What do married guys do when the wife's out of town?

[Fub@r]

Well only been married 6 weeks and wifes out of town on business for a few days. So what does a married guy do besides the huge list of chores left for him to do while she is away.........its a new experience for me :innocent:

[James Deuce]

Play computer games until 2am and then drink yourself unconscious.

Ring up sick the next day and then go for a ride in the afternoon.

Repeat cycle for a couple of weeks.

Above all, ignore chores.

[gijoe1313]

:lol: Ask McJim for a short list ... riding a bike if'n he ain't looking after the sprogs ...

[boostin]

Go to Hooters for dinner....soon

[TonyB]

Call up your mistresses and let them know the coast is clear. Best form a roster though, cause you wouldn't want them to find out they're not the only other-woman, things can get nasty- I have scars to prove it. If you can't get them to do the chores, leave them all till the night before your wife comes home. Take the washing around to your mums if you can.

[Disco Dan]

Call up your mistresses and let them know the coast is clear. Best form a roster though, cause you wouldn't want them to find out they're not the only other-woman, things can get nasty- I have scars to prove it. If you can't get them to do the chores, leave them all till the night before your wife comes home. Take the washing around to your mums if you can.

+1 Vote :yes:



Play computer games until 2am and then drink yourself unconscious.

Ring up sick the next day and then go for a ride in the afternoon.

Repeat cycle for a couple of weeks.

Above all, ignore chores.


+1 Vote :yes:

[MSTRS]

Depends...can't have her thinking she's got a housebitch, can you?

[Qkkid]

:nono: If you do that list of chores you will always get another list each time she goes away:yes: so ignore the list and do what you wanna do enjoy the freedom and your own space :shutup: let her know you will not be dictated too:Punk:

[Oakie]

Watch whatever fecking channel I like on TV (Sky Sports, Discovery, Nat Geo, History Channel) mostly.

Eat odd things for tea.

Not much else.

I start to miss her after about 3 days.

[The_Dover]

masturbate until your cock bleeds?

[Macktheknife]

masturbate until your cock bleeds?

OWWWWWWWWW!
don't do this.

Or you could just do what you normally do and then relax in the peace and quiet of your home, after 15 mins of that you will be bored stupid so ring up your mates and go out on the piss. Or have the guys over for a beer 'n' Pizza 'n' sports night. Or you could just go for a ride every night to somewhere new, catch up with a few KBers and enjoy life.
If you want extra brownie points do some of the chores and send her flowers to wherever she is working, make sure they are delivered during work hours for maximum benefits! include a sloppy note with "I miss you" in there somewhere.

[James Deuce]

O FFS, someone get Dover some lube!

[onearmedbandit]

My wife has been away for the last two months. So what does a guy do while she's away? Any god damn thing he wants, that's what.

Actually to be honest, I can do pretty much anything I want when she is here, only now I've got lots more to take care of so I've found myself with even less time! Being a night owl helps, I'm never in bed before 2am

[Skunk]

Whisky night. And DVDs.

Not the Chick-flicks.

[Drum]

Scotch, smoke and all night Texas Hold'em

[mud boy]

Whisky night. And DVDs.

Not the Chick-flicks.

thats me
1+vote:Punk: :Punk: :Punk:

[YLWDUC]

Well, I know what us lads do when we're away.
And its not "Run off to join the Father Ted brigade" unless its the drunken one that keeps going on about 'arse, feck and knickers'. In that case thats exactly what we get up to (with women, its the navy that gets that basic concept mixed up).

Shit, as for what I do when the CEO goes away... Play XBox, not clean up, watch porn, exercise, repeat....

[MD]

masturbate until your cock bleeds?

That's year two into a marriage. They've only got the first 6 weeks under their belt so he's actually getting full on sex ...for now. I'm guessing she has gone away to give his cock time to heal.:bye:
But year two.. what Dover said.

[Big Dave]

ESPN-a-thon.

[Fub@r]

Play computer games until 2am and then drink yourself unconscious.

Ring up sick the next day and then go for a ride in the afternoon.

Repeat cycle for a couple of weeks.

Above all, ignore chores.



Doing this presently :)

But before she left she stocked cupboard with junk food and easy to cook stuff. Filled fridge with beer...........can't ask for too much more. But then I think junk food + beer in her mind means I won't "wander" :yes:

EDIT: Not that i would

[Indiana_Jones]

Play computer games until 2am and then drink yourself unconscious.

Ring up sick the next day and then go for a ride in the afternoon.

Repeat cycle for a couple of weeks.

Above all, ignore chores.


Jim2, you are spot on!

Man I had an awesome Daytona 500 with beer on my ps2.

Blisters on my thumbs after 200 laps of crashing and bumping :D

go nascar lol

-Indy

[Fub@r]

Missus also got me this before she left :)

http://www.armedassault.com/gallery.html

[Indiana_Jones]

Missus also got me this before she left :)

http://www.armedassault.com/gallery.html

looks like an updated Operation flashpoint, now that fucking game rocked!

-Indy

[Fub@r]

looks like an updated Operation flashpoint, now that fucking game rocked!

-Indy

Yeah it is made by the Flashpoint guys

$60 to download and buy otherwise it $99 when released on 22 March in shops

[Indiana_Jones]

get it in the shops. Well I would, don't trust the net that much.

-Indy

[Storm]

That's year two into a marriage. They've only got the first 6 weeks under their belt so he's actually getting full on sex ...for now. I'm guessing she has gone away to give his cock time to heal.:bye:
But year two.. what Dover said.

I'm at year two and she's even keener than me !
(just thought I'd say it out loud :) :D )

[scrivy]

I'd keep that to myself Storm. You just might get some of your old friends coming around more often when you're not home.......:innocent:

[scrivy]

Sidecar Bob. Do you know Storm........???:shifty:

[sidecar bob]

Sidecar Bob. Do you know Storm........???:shifty:

Err....., No. I saw him coming up the driveway when i was bailing out the bedroom window tho, so i know what he looks like.:2thumbsup

[Grahameeboy]

Same as divorced guys I suppose?

[scrivy]

Geez, you've gotta be quick to beat Dobalina to the poon....:nya:

But really Bob, great to see you escaped in time.......:yes:

[Indiana_Jones]

Geez, you've gotta be quick to beat Dobalina to the poon....:nya:

But really Bob, great to see you escaped in time.......:yes:

"He'll live"


<img src="http://sfstory.free.fr/images/Terminator2/106.jpg">

-Indy

[avgas]

Mermaids with someone else's credit card

[Hitcher]

Spend the first day scouring the house for all of the CCTV cameras...

[crack]

Well only been married 6 weeks and wifes out of town on business for a few days. So what does a married guy do besides the huge list of chores left for him to do while she is away.........its a new experience for me :innocent:

Maybe its a 6 week itch?

She will come back well scratched, and clam up on you for awhile?

:shutup: :shutup: :shutup: :shutup: :shutup:

[riffer]

Jeez you unlucky guys. I'm in year six and can't keep up.

Me - I'd catch up on all the breaths I'd missed.

[Skyryder]

Start counting the day until she returns.

Skyryder

[BarBender]

Organise my unmarried sister look after the kids and then go for a ride.

[Shadows]

Play computer games until 2am and then drink yourself unconscious.



Ring up sick the next day and then go for a ride in the afternoon.


Repeat cycle for a couple of weeks.


Above all, ignore chores.


Damn, I do that when she is here!

[The Pastor]

so... party at fub@r's?

[Hawkeye]

I don't know but in two weeks time, mine of almost 25 years is away for 5 weeks. I have to feed the kids. Burger King, MacDonalds, KFC, Dominoes, Fish & Chips. That's 5 nights covered. Any ideas?

[James Deuce]

Kiwi Pizza, Foodcourt at Queensgate on late night and weekends, Pizza Hutt, Subway (have to do health food at least once), Chinese, Fish and Chips, Gloria Jeans for breakfast, Mr Bun for great fried chicken....

You'll be OK Hawkeye.

[Quartermile]

Watch whatever fecking channel I like on TV (Sky Sports, Discovery, Nat Geo, History Channel) mostly.


yea yea I'm sure, I bet there are a few more(three in particular PPV channels).........:innocent:

[SPman]

Wot Jim said............
You'd be amazed how fast the time goes...............

[Big Dave]

Kiwi Pizza, Foodcourt at Queensgate on late night and weekends, Pizza Hutt, Subway (have to do health food at least once), Chinese, Fish and Chips, Gloria Jeans for breakfast, Mr Bun for great fried chicken....

You'll be OK Hawkeye.




:sick: At least till the coronary.

[magicfairy]

Well only been married 6 weeks and wifes out of town on business for a few days. So what does a married guy do besides the huge list of chores left for him to do while she is away.........its a new experience for me :innocent:

If you want a womens perspective - do at least SOME of the chores - or there won't be any "happy reunion" :angry:

Ignore these brave lads - you'll only get yourself into trouble.
And if you want extra brownie points - do something nice to show her how much you missed her. :love: Get some flowers and put them on a vase on the table.

[Guitana]

If you want a womens perspective - do at least SOME of the chores - or there won't be any "happy reunion" :angry:

Ignore these brave lads - you'll only get yourself into trouble.
And if you want extra brownie points - do something nice to show her how much you missed her. :love: Get some flowers and put them on a vase on the table.

WHAT??????

Why does he need Brownie points he's the man if she dosent like it she can go back to mummy and daddy!!!
Get the bros together and get on the piss party like it's 1999! Get some Ho's round to party with cut loose and enjoy yourself go into town and make a cunt of yourself cos the next twenty years of your life are over!! After six months of marriage the novelty wears off and you realise your fucked but by that time you've probably got her pregnant and the deal is sealed!!! My motto is treat em mean keep em keen!!!!
It works she's threatened to leave so many times I've lost count!!! But she still cooks my eggs!!!!
Most women dont want you for who you are they want to change you and make you into the man of her dreams!! So if you dont have a white horse and shiny armour and a killer smile you're fucked!!!!!!!
Enjoy the time with your mates and get pissed up and when she comes back ignore her, she will love you for it!!!!!:Punk: :Punk: :Punk: :Punk:

Disclaimer: Guitana takes no responsibility for any comments made in this thread and any effect it may have on other peoples relationships, all advice should be ignored unless backed up by your best mate!!

[ManDownUnder]

Well only been married 6 weeks and wifes out of town on business for a few days. So what does a married guy do besides the huge list of chores left for him to do while she is away.........its a new experience for me :innocent:

Get the list - pick your favourites - save those till last

Have a BBQ, invite the boys over, toddle round in your daks and scratch burp and fart till you hit "satisfaction point" (you'll know when you get there)

Shoot things - I find that's always easier to do while the fun police isn't there too... ("aaaa what cute little pukek..." *bang*). Yeah it's happened before... and I lost points - go figure

or - do what you think you should. She doesn't want to come home to a complete write off/mess, but then you're not a slave either. Find that middle ground

[Dave Lobster]

Shoot things - I find that's always easier to do while the fun police isn't there too... ("aaaa what cute little pukek..." *bang*). Yeah it's happened before... and I lost points - go figure


DON'T keep collars as souvenirs. She WILL find them..

[ManDownUnder]

DON'T keep collars as souvenirs. She WILL find them..

g-strings can be hard to explain too

"honey... I was just hanging out the washing and... ... umm... whats THIS???"

[ManDownUnder]

If you want a womens perspective - do at least SOME of the chores - or there won't be any "happy reunion" :angry:


LOL and if you want a mans perspective - don't leave a list (no - seriously... don't)

[Jimmy B]

Do what I do and thats absolutley what I want to do, which does not include domestic chores until 24 hours before the ETA of Mrs JB, then I clean up like a maniac :Punk:

[Marmoot]

Play computer games until 2am and then drink yourself unconscious.

Ring up sick the next day and then go for a ride in the afternoon.

Repeat cycle for a couple of weeks.

Above all, ignore chores.


+1 vote.

Definitely do NOT do chores.
The best way to avoid duties is to be deemed useless in doing it.

[Alice]

Highly amusing reading all the above comments. Thats "one" of the great things about men, they make you laugh.

[ArcherWC]

:nono: If you do that list of chores you will always get another list each time she goes away:yes: so ignore the list and do what you wanna do enjoy the freedom and your own space :shutup: let her know you will not be dictated too:Punk:


What he said (wonder if Dawn/Donna has seen this yet)

[ArcherWC]

DON'T keep collars as souvenirs. She WILL find them..


Or handcuffs :innocent:

[mstriumph]

whenever there's a thread like this it's always the she going away and the he wondering wat to do in her absence ........

does this mean us gals are more self-sufficient? :innocent:

[Jimmy B]

whenever there's a thread like this it's always the she going away and the he wondering wat to do in her absence ........

does this mean us gals are more self-sufficient? :innocent:

Quite possible but highly unlikely

[ManDownUnder]

does this mean us gals are more self-sufficient? :innocent:

No - there's a really long way to describe the change in dynamic or it can be crudely summed up in one word

"controlling"

Like I said -"crudely" summed up...

[mstriumph]

No - there's a really long way to describe the change in dynamic or it can be crudely summed up in one word

"controlling"

Like I said -"crudely" summed up...

yeah - just like the mortar between the bricks is "controlling" :yes:

[Indiana_Jones]

Rent lots of pr0n!

-Indy

[Jimmy B]

yeah - just like the mortar between the bricks is "controlling" :yes:

Not so much controlling, more limiting their ability to go in their own direction :innocent:

[mstriumph]

Not so much controlling, more limiting their ability to go in their own direction :innocent:

that's assuming that bricks have free will .......... sherbet i REALLY shouldn't get into this sorta metawhatsit discussion before i'm properly awake :shutup:

[The_Dover]

yeah - just like the mortar between the bricks is "controlling" :yes:

but what fuckin use is a pile of mortar without any bricks?

[Smorg]

Missus also got me this before she left :)

http://www.armedassault.com/gallery.html

thats looks sweet man, is it online as well?

[mstriumph]

but what fuckin use is a pile of mortar without any bricks?

yeah - memo to self "wake UP before posting ......" :mellow:

everything that instantly springs to mind can be spun into mirth or obscenity so i'll just ....... shut up :shutup:

[Guitana]

Rent lots of pr0n!

-Indy

What's PRON Indy???????? Is it like that movie Tron???????

[Guitana]

but what fuckin use is a pile of mortar without any bricks?

How did we get onto Bricks and Mortar I thought we were talking about partying with dirty girls?????

[ManDownUnder]

In all honesty - I'd say this... plan nothing and see what you end up doing...

THAT'S what you should do.

[James Deuce]

Honesty? Since when was that part of a functioning marriage?

Lie! Do no Chores!

[Mr Merde]

I your situation I would be hoping that she isnt doing what you are being advised to do :yes:

[Guitana]

Honesty? Since when was that part of a functioning marriage?

Lie! Do no Chores!


Too right Jim that's the problem these days people are to honest and it's killed the fun of a relationship!!! I remember when my mate gave his girlfreind the clap after we had been on a rugby trip in Aussie!! He told her he caught it off the toilet seat in the hotel but when she went to see her Quack he filled her in and the jig was up now if that quack had just been a little dishonest and helped a brother out they might still be together today STD free!!!!!!!!

[ManDownUnder]

Too right Jim that's the problem these days people are to honest and it's killed the fun of a relationship!!! I remember when my mate gave his girlfreind the clap after we had been on a rugby trip in Aussie!! He told her he caught it off the toilet seat in the hotel but when she went to see her Quack he filled her in and the jig was up now if that quack had just been a little dishonest and helped a brother out they might still be together today STD free!!!!!!!!

LOL or the old two step... he goes to get tested first - and asks HER where she got it from... "you expect me to believe you got it from the toilet seat"????

[Guitana]

LOL or the old two step... he goes to get tested first - and asks HER where she got it from... "you expect me to believe you got it from the toilet seat"????

Yeah FILTHY!!!!!:nono:

[The Stranger]

:nono: If you do that list of chores you will always get another list each time she goes away:yes: so ignore the list and do what you wanna do enjoy the freedom and your own space :shutup: let her know you will not be dictated too:Punk:

love to be a fly on the wall when Dawn spots this - you're going to be in trouble.

[Fub@r]

thats looks sweet man, is it online as well?

Yeah supports around 100 players online, can also have co-op online against AI (which is damn hard at times)

One map plays the entire country, takes up to 15-20 minutes to drive across it

[Guitana]

love to be a fly on the wall when Dawn spots this - you're going to be in trouble.

Leave the brother alone he's entitled to his say!!!! Don't worry mate if she kicks you out you can always find a place with a KBer!!!!!

[Smorg]

Yeah supports around 100 players online, can also have co-op online against AI (which is damn hard at times)

One map plays the entire country, takes up to 15-20 minutes to drive across it

Jeebuz, that'd make for some drawn out game play. Must be a small country....Liechtenstein or something. Might have to make a little purchase
BF2 is growing long in the teeth