View Full Version : The Husband Store
Clockwork
22nd March 2007, 15:22
A brand new store has just opened in New York City that sells Husbands. When women go to choose a husband, they have to follow the instructions at the entrance:-
"You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are 6 floors and the value of the products increase as you ascend the flights. You may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you CANNOT go back down except to exit the building! So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband.
On the 1st floor the sign on the door reads: Floor 1 - These men have jobs.
The 2nd floor sign reads: Floor 2 - These men Have Jobs and Love Kids.
The 3rd floor sign reads: Floor 3 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids and are extremely good looking.
"Wow," she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.
She goes to the 4th floor and the sign reads: Floor 4 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and Help with Housework.
"Oh, mercy me!" she exclaims, "I can hardly stand it!"
Still, she goes to the 5th floor and sign reads: Floor 5 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, help with Housework and Have A Strong Romantic Streak. She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the 6th floor and the sign reads:
Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store .
To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opens a New Wives store just across the street.
The 1st floor has wives that love sex.
The 2nd floor has wives that love sex and have money.
The 3rd through 6th floors have never been visited.
ArcherWC
22nd March 2007, 15:27
Laughed my ass off, soooooooooooo true
Maha
22nd March 2007, 15:33
My wife came from across the street on the 2nd floor and found me on the 4th floor...:love:
ps: I was installing the new Vinyl to that level....:cool:
MotoGirl
22nd March 2007, 15:43
I love it! I notice the important things didn't even feature, i.e. brains and personality :doh:
Maha
22nd March 2007, 15:48
I love it! I notice the important things didn't even feature, i.e. brains and personality :doh:
I was born with both and have honed those personal qualities to the best of my abillity over the last few decades.....:second:
Jantar
22nd March 2007, 16:49
I love it! I notice the important things didn't even feature, i.e. brains and personality :doh:
No, the most important thing is on the first floor. :dodge:
MotoGirl
22nd March 2007, 16:55
No, the most important thing is on the first floor. :dodge:
You're after a man who has a job? Mind you, wages can buy paper bags if he's ugly...
kelleyb
9th October 2007, 18:27
A "Husband Shopping Center" was opened where a woman could go to choose from among many men, for her husband. It was laid out in five floors, with the men increasing in positive attributes as you ascended up the floors.
The only rule was, once you opened the door to any floor, you must choose a man from that floor, and if you went up a floor, you couldn't go back down except to leave the place. So, a couple of girlfriends go to the place to find men.
First floor, the door had a sign saying: "These men have jobs and
love kids."
The women read the sign and say: "Well that's better than not
having jobs, or not loving kids, but I wonder what's further up?" So up they go.
Second floor says: "These men have high paying jobs, love kids, and are extremely good looking." Hmmm, say the girls. But, I wonder what's further up?".
Third floor: "These men have high paying jobs, are extremely good looking, love kids and help with the housework." Wow! say the women. Very tempting, BUT, there's more further up!? And so again, they go up.
Fourth floor: "These men have high paying jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking, help with the housework, and have a strong romantic streak." Oh, mercy me. But just think!?!?! What must be awaiting us further on!
So up to the fifth floor they go. The sign on that door said: "There are no men on this floor. This floor is just to prove that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping and have a nice day!!
WarlockNZ
9th October 2007, 18:34
oh sniper ... where for art thou sniper ?? .. lol
deanohit
9th October 2007, 18:54
Hahaha, love it!!!!!
EJK
10th October 2007, 14:22
Damn right! hahaha
fireball
11th October 2007, 14:42
not my kinda of store.. good thing i hate shopping
jrandom
11th October 2007, 14:54
Misogynistic jokes aren't funny.
_Shrek_
15th February 2010, 16:04
A store that sells new husbands has opened in New York City , where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates:
You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!
So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads:
Floor 1 - These men Have Jobs
She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor, where the sign reads:
Floor 2 - These men Have Jobs and Love Kids.
'That's nice,' she thinks, 'but I want more.'
So she continues upward. The third floor sign reads:
Floor 3 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, and are Extremely Good Looking.
'Wow,' she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.
She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 4 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Good Looking and Help With Housework.
'Oh, mercy me!' she exclaims, 'I can hardly stand it!'
Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 5 - These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop-dead Gorgeous, Help with Housework, and Have a Strong Romantic Streak.
She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign reads:
Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.
PLEASE NOTE:
To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opened a New Wives store just across the street.
The first floor has wives that love sex.
The second floor has wives that love sex and have money and like beer.
The third, fourth, fifth and sixth floors have never been visited., :laugh: I wonder Y
_Shrek_
15th February 2010, 16:28
:slap: sorry about that Clockwork I just got this & didn't see that it was posted already evan though I had a look to see if it had been
The Stranger
15th February 2010, 19:52
Sound to me like the men on floors 4 and 5 are homos.
Clockwork
16th February 2010, 12:57
:slap: sorry about that Clockwork I just got this & didn't see that it was posted already evan though I had a look to see if it had been
Ha! its been so long since I posted it I'd forgotten it. (actually I was surprised when I spotted my name under the thread title)
Thanks for reminding me. I laughed all over again.
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