Quartermile
23rd March 2007, 21:22
1. ask how many dolphins were killed to make that pizza
2. Ask if the pizza is organically grown
3. Ask if you can rent a pizza
4. ASk if you can keep the pizza box, when they say yes, sigh and say "Thank god for that i need something to put my crayons in
5. Ask specifically for the person who took you order last time
6. Ask to see a menu
7. Ask what clothes the order taker is wearing
8. Ask what their phone number is, hang up, call them and say "do I have the right number for pizza".
9. Avoid saying the word pizza at all costs. If the order taker says it then reply "please dont mention that word, you will send me into toxic shock.
10. Berate the order taker with little known facts about Tom Cruise
11. Do not name the toppings you want, instead spell them and then ask them to spell them back
12. Give no address, exclaim "oh just surprise me" and hang up
13. Make the first topping you order anchovies and make the last thing you say "definitely no anchovies please, they make me fit", hang up before they can respond
14. Stutter on the letter P
15. Order a Big Mac super value chicken meal
16. Cancel that order and instead order a steamed pizza
17. Tell the order taker there is a rival pizza place on the other line and you will will go with the lowest bidder
18. Ask them to hold then scream at the top of your voice " Get back to your fuckin cupboard bitch", throw a pan on the ground then resume the phone call like nothing happened
19. Tell the order taker you are depressed and have a bottle of sleeping pills next to the phone. Try to get them to cheer you up.
20. Tell them to put the crust on top this time
21. Terminate the call with "remember we never had this conversation"
22. Use expletives like "Great Caesar's ghost" and "Jesus, Joseph and Mary in tinsel town
23. When all else fails sing the entire order to the tune of achy breaky heart
2. Ask if the pizza is organically grown
3. Ask if you can rent a pizza
4. ASk if you can keep the pizza box, when they say yes, sigh and say "Thank god for that i need something to put my crayons in
5. Ask specifically for the person who took you order last time
6. Ask to see a menu
7. Ask what clothes the order taker is wearing
8. Ask what their phone number is, hang up, call them and say "do I have the right number for pizza".
9. Avoid saying the word pizza at all costs. If the order taker says it then reply "please dont mention that word, you will send me into toxic shock.
10. Berate the order taker with little known facts about Tom Cruise
11. Do not name the toppings you want, instead spell them and then ask them to spell them back
12. Give no address, exclaim "oh just surprise me" and hang up
13. Make the first topping you order anchovies and make the last thing you say "definitely no anchovies please, they make me fit", hang up before they can respond
14. Stutter on the letter P
15. Order a Big Mac super value chicken meal
16. Cancel that order and instead order a steamed pizza
17. Tell the order taker there is a rival pizza place on the other line and you will will go with the lowest bidder
18. Ask them to hold then scream at the top of your voice " Get back to your fuckin cupboard bitch", throw a pan on the ground then resume the phone call like nothing happened
19. Tell the order taker you are depressed and have a bottle of sleeping pills next to the phone. Try to get them to cheer you up.
20. Tell them to put the crust on top this time
21. Terminate the call with "remember we never had this conversation"
22. Use expletives like "Great Caesar's ghost" and "Jesus, Joseph and Mary in tinsel town
23. When all else fails sing the entire order to the tune of achy breaky heart