The injustice of it all....

[Paul in NZ]

My best mate at work (as perviously posted), and a damn good guy / friend has entered the final stages of the big C... Chemo and rad didn't do it and now we are onto Mr morphine, giant tumours and the Hospices..... We loose the one guy I can trust to do what he says, his daughter loses a fabulous father and his wife loses a soul mate....

edited due to sobriety - more later....

[scumdog]

Sad, sad times Paul - life is so unfair at times.

At least you are sensitive and have compassion and feeling for the dying.

I unfortunately find I do not have those feelings - my job has killed them.

Condolences to you matey.:mellow:

[Paul in NZ]

Thanks - you don't know the half of it... this helped - off to bed now - sad... Christ we have to get together and get shitfaced sometime soon

[Youngjim]

Stick in there Paul, life deals some real bad hands to the good guys sometimes, while all the bad bastards who beat up kids etc have it sweet.
My thoughts are with you and your mate.

[Drum]

Here's to your mate. :drinkup:

[jazbug5]

I wish I could say something that would help to turn it all into sense, but it always seems so trite, doesn't it... so you just stay silent and do what you can do.
I am counting down the minutes until 4.00 this afternoon, when I have to attend the funeral of two young girls who were murdered by their mother last month.
I have had a very hard time trying to frame this in such a way as to make sense somehow, but sometimes it just doesn't- or perhaps us mere mortals are just not equipped to understand the meaning of it anyway.
I'll be thinking of you Paul; I hope his final days are as beautiful as he deserves them to be, and that you all make some sort of peace with it after the anger has passed.

[Skyryder]

The old saying 'God moves in mysterious ways' sounds a bit hollow at time like this. But sometimes he does.

I had a close friend who passed away sometime ago. On occasion I still thank the man for the memories. It still helps to this day.

Skyryder

[jimbo600]

Sometimes it just plain isn't fair mate.

Sorry about your mate.

[Madness]

Thinking of you & your mate Paul.

Last week my missus was told she's in remission & no more Chemo. Yesterday she tested 20% down, now looking at another 10 week Chemo & Radiation course. Life can be a coont!

[Deano]

My thoughts are with you and your mate Paul - take care man.

[limbimtimwim]

Life an't fair.

Best you can do is have as many good times as you can before it's all over.

[Al]

Thoughts are with you, Paul.

You were a good mate to this guy and that is so important.

Kia Kaha

Al

[Paul in NZ]

Hey thanks everyone...

I was self medicating with bourbon and thats never pretty but I meant every word. I talked to the family this morning and it's not ended - so I'll just keep busy I reckon and think about what to say on the day...

The kind thoughts do help eh - well that and mr panadol (d'oh)

Cheers

[Winston001]

My thoughts are with you and your friend Paul. Thanks for letting us know. Our lives are a conundrum at times.

[ynot slow]

Agree with everything you've written,have a drink with him if you can,my personal drop was a gasolene-shot of tequila and southern comfort,wicked brew.Had a few whilst having chemo and my chemo wasn't strong (but still not nice),as well as a few rums and bourbons and beers one night,talkabout toasted,we had to get taxi home as I couldn't walk(home was 5 mins walk),as an aside if he has a partner just ask her how she is,my experiance was everyone asked how I was,but my wife was hardly asked how she felt,got to stage I said fine all the time,friends forget it isn't the person with cancer who needs support,it can be those closest to them that need support to.

Sounds stupid but remember the good times and cherish those thoughts,last words you probably need to hear but it seems to be true.My thoughts are with you and the families concerned,yes it is a bastard disease.

[Hitcher]

If your friend's in a Hospice, Paul, he's in the best place possible for his final hours. I hope he's feeling no pain.

[MotoGirl]

I feel for you and am sorry to hear about your sadness. At least the Cancer gave you the chance to say goodbye to a mate you love.

All the best for the times ahead.

[Paul in NZ]

If your friend's in a Hospice, Paul, he's in the best place possible for his final hours. I hope he's feeling no pain.

In and out Brett.. The irony of ending up there when we were the ones that did their IT at peppercorn rates for little thanks has not escaped me... argh.. I wish I was not so damn angry about this...

[Nasty]

Our thoughts are with you paul in this shit of a time, and also with your mate and his family as they travel through this in their own way ... life sucks the big lemon at times .. but its important to make sure that people know how we feel about them and how they have influenced our lives ... (found that out the hard way) ...

[riffer]

Rough justice.

Sorry to hear Paul. The worst things happen to the best people. :(

[fireliv]

Hey

Sorry to hear about ure mate. Its not easy and definatly not fair. Take care of yourself cos by the sounds of it there may be some others (Yours and his family) who are going to need you to be there when it counts.

[ynot slow]

If he's in the local hospice,I hope you get the responce I got from a mate,he looked up at me and smiled from the bed,then we had to leave as nurses needed to administer his pain relief,was last I saw of him.My last words were "Bloody things you need to do to get a decent bed in hospital",we had only known him and his partner for couple of months,such was the bond you made whilst having radiation,and away from home,lost for words at present.

[Paul in NZ]

Its over.....

Got to see him one last time on Sunday morning..... Heartbreaking....

Thanks for the kind thoughts everyone - Bernard was a bloody decent guy

[Edbear]

Condolences, mate...!

[Stickchick]

Condolences Paul, my thoughts are with you, your family and your friends family

[chanceyy]

condolences Paul ..




RIP Bernard .. may you now feel no pain, & may your spirit soar

[ManDownUnder]

The next time a beer's in hand it'll be raised to him.

Paul - sorry to hear of the situation...

[Nasty]

Condolences to you and your family Paul for this loss ... hold dear to the memories ....

[Joni]

Im sorry for your loss Paul.
:hug:

[Maha]

Cant be easy Paul, look after ya'self mate , and those around you the need it most....Mark

[Blackbird]

Condolences for everyone's loss. You take good care of yourself Paul. It's ok to shout and rage and cry in equal measure mate.

[Macktheknife]

Paul, my sympathy for the loss of your friend.
I know this may sound a little wierd but, try writing down all the memories of him that you can, you might be pleasantly surprised at how much your mood improves.

[Pussy]

RIP Bernard. Thinking of you, Paul

[crashe]

Condolances Paul, to you and Bernard's family and friends.

Rest in Peace Bernard.

[avgas]

Fuck mate that sucks big time.
I just went through this with a mate about 2 weeks ago. I found the only thing that helped me was put jump on the bike, go somewhere quiet and swear abuse at the heavens.
Hope you move on with life and remember the good things about him.

[Paul in NZ]

I found the only thing that helped me was put jump on the bike, go somewhere quiet and swear abuse at the heavens..

Funny you should say that... ;-)

Sunday we took the 1970 TR6C 'cos it was classic club ride day and even though the forecast was dire Bernard loved the classics and knew it was me 'cos of the bike...

Kinda rough - riding away from his place in the rain. The inside of my helmet was a bit damp for some reason... Damn! Put in an appearance on the club thing but shot away early and we took the long way home through the hills, wet roads, windy and cold but with Vicki snugged up behind and our faithful 'C' beneath us we eased the kinks from our souls as we flowed through the bends and explored numbers bigger than usual on the tach....

Not fast by todays modern standards but exciting on mossy bends all the same...

Finally, when we were drained and tired, we headed home with straw coloured headers and calm minds. Some days - it really does take more than one tank of gas to set your head straight eh!.....

Hard days...

[86GSXR]

Very sorry to read of this Paul.