Bad Poet's Open Mike

[Slipstream]

Ode to Steinlager
by The Handbrake

Steinlager thou dost stand so tall,
the 'stubbie' does not reach.
Condensation does make you
look, fuzzy as a peach.

But a peach you are not,
for you are not so tart.
Cool and soothing are
the brushstrokes of your art.

Five percent of
New Zealands finest.
Don't bother to check,
thees local royal winelist.

On the back of mine
current green slender.
I see an All Black immortal,
imaging that nights winning bender.

Constant supporter of our AB's,
it does stand so proud.
When enough have been had,
thee does sing ever so loud.

Premium lager so liquid and cold,
thou art so refreshing.
One sip or one scull,
to be surely thirst quenching.

How do I love thee Steinlager,
I shall not count the ways.
For if I do so,
we'll be here for days.

So let me end this here and now,
for you have read it thus far.
WT, when you get home,
I've got a cold one ready for ya.

:apint: :niceone:

[vifferman]

A cold what?

<_<

(PS) That wasn't such bad poetry - quite good, in fact!

[Ms Piggy]

What a clever lass.

Someone pass me Macs Gold :apint:

[jrandom]

That really is quite good. I liked it. More, please.

I still hate Steinlager, though...

[White trash]

:niceone: Good on ya, mate.

[Ghost Lemur]

That really is quite good. I liked it. More, please.

I still hate Steinlager, though...

Gotta agree on all counts.

Steinlager yck. Handbrake poetry, very cool. :niceone:

[Slipstream]

That really is quite good. I liked it. More, please.

There was a girl who would be a poet
She loved her voice cos she could throw it
She spent all of her time
finding things that could rhyme
then finally she came up with...
.............aw fuck it!!!

[Blakamin]

Nice poem... try to get one happening for Victoria Bitter!!! :whistle:

[MikeL]

Don't give up your day job...

[Hitcher]

Your flowing prose your rhyme and diction
Your arresting name involving friction
Shall I compare thee to a beer
Or pen a tale involving ale?

[Hitcher]

OK then poets, prizes for the best Haiku involving your bike.

I'll start:

Kawasaki ZRX 1200 muscle bike with attitude.

[Slipstream]

Nice poem... try to get one happening for Victoria Bitter!!! :whistle:

No one knows what happened to the sitter
as she stubbed out her last and became a quitter
was it the smoke
when she had her last toke
Or was it the fact that Victoria's bitter?


:ar15: :doobey: :apint:



:sick: :puke: I think my poems are gettin worse.... :disapint:

[Slipstream]

OK then poets, prizes for the best Haiku involving your bike.

I'll start:

Kawasaki ZRX 1200 muscle bike with attitude.


what is it...5 6 5?
I will do my best and strive..




I am without bike,
It is not where I like.
There. My U of Haik




You know the rhyming is really getting to me
I must stop typing to become free....

....aaarrrgh!!!! :angry2:

[Blakamin]

No one knows what happened to the sitter
as she stubbed out her last and became a quitter
was it the smoke
when she had her last toke
Or was it the fact that Victoria's bitter?


:ar15: :doobey: :apint:



:sick: :puke: I think my poems are gettin worse.... :disapint:
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh: :niceone:
Cheers!

[Ghost Lemur]

what is it...5 6 5?



5-7-5. :)

But there's a bit more to real Hai Ku than that though.

[StoneChucker]

Yamaha R1
Once gave much pleasure and peace
Now lies slayed in shop

[ching_ching]

Vroom, vroom, vroom, I ride
Vroom, vroom, vroom, I twist and turn,
Urrgggg!, I stop... I'm happy!

God what a piece of shit eh guys and gals :beer: :whistle:

[White trash]

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Some poems ryme
































This one doesn't.

Little jack Horner
Sat the corner
Eating his Christmas pie

He stuck in his thumb
And pulled out a bulldozer
and said















Struth, I could'a choked on that!

I'm goin' 'ome to have a beer with the sexy, SEXY Handbrake. :beer: :drinknsin

[Hitcher]

what is it...5 6 5?
17 syllables

[Hitcher]

5-7-5. :)

But there's a bit more to real Hai Ku than that though.
Sheesh! Don't go making it too hard...

[Slipstream]

17 syllables

Say Hi to Handbrake
For she is one who drinks much
Then makes little sense

:apint:

[StoneChucker]

I'm searching for it
But me?, I never find it!
Will it EVER come?

[Slipstream]

by The Handbrake



Well it's Saturday night
when people go out and party
guys with their cologne
girls dressed all tarty

The streets are all crowded
the clubs are all dim
the bartenders all charming
and the doormen are grim

little girls getting frisky
old maids staying shrew
little boys tempting fate
old men with greenish hew

there is dancing and drinking
where the bars are all smokey
and hidden upstairs
the wails of karaoke

inside are the drinkers
outside are the smokers
and you even might sniff
round the corner...the tokers

ladies kick up their heels
and drink themselves silly
guys get them home
and see whats pink and frilly

then daylight wakes them
of all this frivolity
the harsh brightness of day
or is it sobreity

Now this is something
that I missed out on
for some circumstances
that I didn't count upon

I thought to myself
that's Ok, an early night
but I went to my room
then out with a fright

I slept in the lounge
not something I like
while _he_ slept in bed
with his brand new bike

[Hitcher]

Please, no doggerel...

[Storm]

So , you slept on the couch and he kept the bike company. AT least we know which way he voted on the sex vs bikes poll then !!!! :argh: