Riding after taking a shit

[SwanTiger]

I am curious to know if other members of this fine establishment share a common displeasure for riding after passing fecal matter through their anus.

Personally, it feels like my arse has been violated and needs to recover it's 'comfortably diginity' sort of status. Know what I mean?

However I know some people who can shit, then ride, run, exercise, etc.

Another reason for raising this question is when you need to take a shit while out on a long ride. The vibrations sometimes relax the muscles, especially on a V-twin, and you end up trying to hold it in.

Also, I think wees is another related topic of interest.

Please share your thoughts on shit and wees management while out riding.

[98tls]

I am curious to know if other members of this fine establishment share a common displeasure for riding after passing fecal matter through their anus.

Personally, it feels like my arse has been violated and needs to recover it's 'comfortably diginity' sort of status. Know what I mean?

However I know some people who can shit, then ride, run, exercise, etc.

Another reason for raising this question is when you need to take a shit while out on a long ride. The vibrations sometimes relax the muscles, especially on a V-twin, and you end up trying to hold it in.

Also, I think wees is another related topic of interest.

Please share your thoughts on shit and wees management while out riding. Swanny mate,in your case i think shit coming out your anus is the least of your worrys.Wipe your chin.

[Boob Johnson]

Swanny mate,in your case i think shit coming out your anus is the least of your worrys.Wipe your chin.
lmfao!!! Couldn't have said it better myself.

Im pretty sure this is the potty trained section of the forums :laugh:

[Scouse]

Oh Ithought this thread was about riding after smokin some shit

[SwanTiger]

Swanny mate,in your case i think shit coming out your anus is the least of your worrys.Wipe your chin.

Excuse me, this is a relevant topic that directly relates to every single motorcyclist, regardless of their chosen machine, age, race, gender or in skidMark's case, species.

[SwanTiger]

Oh Ithought this thread was about riding after smokin some shit

That's tomorrow's thread, which will be inspired by the Norfland Crew !

[MSTRS]

If this function upsets you...get a colostomy bag fitted. With sequins on it if you like. Bling for bung.

[MisterD]

I think you maybe need to up the fibre content of your diet...

[Deano]

Try riding a sports bike with blue balls.

[Brett]

Cant say that I share your problem. Can I suggest Muesli or Allbran for breakfast to ...loosen things up??
Nothing worse than riding on a full bladder tho...some bumpy roads make it torture.

[rufusdion]

.......................ahahhahhahahhahahhahhaha :lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:
i really dont know what to say.

[The Pastor]

I find it hard/annoying to remove boots/ pants in order to take a shit when in a rush.

[boomer]

i do believe a doctor might tell you that you suffer such a reaction due to the fact your sphincter muscle takes such a beasting. Tell Grahameeboy .. NO! and watch as you too can ride immediately after taking a dump as the elastacin in ya brown star returns you to comfort mode immediately.

[98tls]

I think you maybe need to up the fibre content of your diet... Carbon works.

[Mom]

As a Mom I am somewhat of an expert on poohs and wees. Mate, you should have dealt with the poo thing not long after your feet hit the floor in the morning.....usually my 2nd cup of coffee sorts that out. (can never have enough info eh guys!)

I can however realte to the OMG! sort of "I need to go poo poo now!" feeling if you manage to overcook a corner, or heaven forbid have a close encounter of the caged variety.

The wees thing is individual, but as a rule of thumb, go wees before you leave is good Mom advice.........apart from that......


ROTFLMAO.............welcome back Swanny!

[Mom]

you too can ride immediately after taking a dump as the elastacin in ya brown star returns you to comfort mode immediately.

A thought here..........the quick shut valve of the starfish may well be a fool proof way to "hang on" to your seat, so to speak........:shifty:

[boomer]

A thought here..........the quick shut valve of the starfish may well be a fool proof way to "hang on" to your seat, so to speak........:shifty:

very true.. however there'd have to be a cure to that 'internal itch'....... :crazy:

[Mom]

very true.. however there'd have to be a cure to that 'internal itch'....... :crazy:

I heard there is a cream to fix that now..:innocent:

[jrandom]

In my books, there's few things better than a good dump before a ride.

I've had some nasty late-evening cramps when taking a shit after a long day's riding, what with the core muscles working away all day, leaning my gut into the tank, etc.

Best to get it out of the way before getting on the bike, and thereby enjoy the freedom of empty bowels.

:yes:

[homer]

what the fucks wrong with you
where the fuck did you come from
i just dont have an answer




.......I suppose next you ll want a wrong number so other cunts can hang up on you ......:angry2:

There enough shit around now as it is with out someone like you putting more in everyones face .....
sorry to all other offended by this

if you want a piss get a old bike tube stick ya dick in that ...oh thats right thats effluent discharge thats illegal
I also see on your profile that your interest is intelegence.............go ask

[Grub]

Please share your thoughts on shit and wees management while out riding.


Wear a nappy. If you're old enuff you qualify for one from your local retirement village

[mynameis]

Sounds like the old valves are a bit loose aye, stop hoeing around and you will be fine.

[Mom]

I find it hard/annoying to remove the boots in order to take a shit when in a rush.

I know I am going to regret this but as I have often thought you have received a heap of boots up the arse for talking shit, are you confirming it for me?????? :sunny:

[The Pastor]

everyone loves me.

[doc]

I am curious to know if other members of this fine establishment share a common displeasure for riding after passing fecal matter through their anus.

Personally, it feels like my arse has been violated and needs to recover it's 'comfortably diginity' sort of status. Know what I mean?

However I know some people who can shit, then ride, run, exercise, etc.

Another reason for raising this question is when you need to take a shit while out on a long ride. The vibrations sometimes relax the muscles, especially on a V-twin, and you end up trying to hold it in.

Also, I think wees is another related topic of interest.

Please share your thoughts on shit and wees management while out riding.
You sad fucker. Why am I responding. Thats right I'm trying to represent the normal one's. Get a life man.

[homer]

have to agree with you 100

[Oakie]

If taking a dump makes you feel like that I recommend that you visit your local bike mechanic.

Why?

I think your arse needs a rebore. :buggerd:

[Trudes]

I need to go before I go!!!

[Maha]

that 'internal itch'....... :crazy:

Ahhhhhhhhhhh so thats some of U's get off the seat while in mid corner? Dont wipe properly, it drys a little an the Itch' sets in!...:cool:

[Swoop]

If this function upsets you...get a colostomy bag fitted. With sequins on it if you like.
Perhaps tassles?:whistle:

[Pancakes]

I know I am going to regret this but as I have often thought you have received a heap of boots up the arse for talking shit, are you confirming it for me?????? :sunny:

You must spread some reputation around before giving it to Mom again.


From sea kayaking experience, you can wee and thats nice and warm for a little bit but no poo-poos. And for quite a few years I spent hours in a harness or in many layers of snow gear with no shelter nearby so it's pretty much one in the morning and then forget about it.

If your having issues tho you need to get some nice cereal, not lolly cereal. Hubbards Berry berry lite or fruitful lite are my fave's, a good coffee and see ya later. Fruit too and less processed food. You need some things to get right the way thru, think corn.


Bet you eat white bread too, get into the wholegrain brown.

[nadroj]

Get a Back-Sack & crack & wipe your arse properly!

[SwanTiger]

I just can't shit 'on demand' like others can and it really annoys me, I go at least once every one or two days.

Looking further up in the replies I see that someone has mentioned kayaking, this is a fine example of the point I am trying to make, besides taking the piss out of everyone.

To all the haters, this is a valid topic directly related to motorcycling, if you fail to appreciate the truthful and comedic value of this thread discussion you are not a true motorcyclist. Instead, I think you are a dick head.

[Mom]

I just can't shit 'on demand' like others can and it really annoys me, I go at least once every one or two days.

Looking further up in the replies I see that someone has mentioned kayaking, this is a fine example of the point I am trying to make, besides taking the piss out of everyone.

To all the haters, this is a valid topic directly related to motorcycling, if you fail to appreciate the truthful and comedic value of this thread discussion you are not a true motorcyclist. Instead, I think you are a dick head.

Once every one or two days is NORMAL mate. If you are a bit bunged up and want to be freeee before a ride out, I recommend Coloxyl with senna, taken before bed ensures you will get that AAAHHHHHHHHHH feeling in the AM. Give it a few mins and you will be champing at the bit to get to the next pie stop....:wari:

[carver]

I am curious to know if other members of this fine establishment share a common displeasure for riding after passing fecal matter through their anus.

Personally, it feels like my arse has been violated and needs to recover it's 'comfortably diginity' sort of status. Know what I mean?

However I know some people who can shit, then ride, run, exercise, etc.

Another reason for raising this question is when you need to take a shit while out on a long ride. The vibrations sometimes relax the muscles, especially on a V-twin, and you end up trying to hold it in.

Also, I think wees is another related topic of interest.

Please share your thoughts on shit and wees management while out riding.

stop having anal penatration and it should stop :hug:

its that simple!

[Pancakes]

I agree that it's relevant and the human norm is from a few times a day to every few days. At the snow I seem to get the urge once in the morning and thats me for the day, my body just knows i guess.

[Usarka]

Having problems grape ape? :lol:
<img src=http://www.animationalley.com/images/animationart/hannabarbera/grapeape.jpg>

[McJim]

I have no problem riding after taking a dump - I feel all good and cleaned out after a good ol' defacation...and considerably lighter too (which is handy in the corners) it's busting for a shit DURING the ride that gets me...will the public loo be clean enough...will I have to crouch in the bushes with no toilet roll...and that sort of thing.

You should learn how to wipe your arse properly - it's a useful life skill that stops you from feeling so uncomfortable after a dump. :rofl:

[jafar]

stop having anal penatration and it should stop :hug:

its that simple!

& you would know this how ???:eek::rolleyes:

[carver]

& you would know this how ???:eek::rolleyes:

ah...sidewinder and i are mormons now!

[SwanTiger]

& you would know this how ???:eek::rolleyes:

I hear that there are a lot of gay bars in Hamilton, I suppose they have to find something to do down them there ways, auh huah!

[dipshit]

I remember reading an article in a magazine once that said as much...

Top GP riders have a diet with of lots of fruit and vegetables because they need to "empty their lower bowels" before a race.

[jafar]

ah...sidewinder and i are mormons now!

Yeah right :jerry:

Don't come door knocking round here then:buggerd:

[jafar]

I hear that there are a lot of gay bars in Hamilton, I suppose they have to find something to do down them there ways, auh huah!

Better than sheep i guess:msn-wink:

[carver]

I hear that there are a lot of gay bars in Hamilton, I suppose they have to find something to do down them there ways, auh huah!

but we live in temple view since our conversion


better watch it, like jafar says, we'll come door knocking!

[Bren]

Another good thread to have a good laugh over...im lovin it, though the subject is a bit dubious....

...The worst thing I have found as previously mentioned is not wiping properly (but due to the sandpaper grade dunnywipes found in some toilets I can understand that)....then comes the dry stage as mentioned previously, and if you are hairy enough down below it gets to the dags on yer arse stage!

[AllanB]

On those long rides lay off the cans of V and coffee cans of V = wee

I saw (or is this one sore) on a TV doco a while back about gays using a thing called a butt-plug when out dating ...google it if you dare...however this may help your V-twin problem.

[Squiggles]

I find it hard/annoying to remove boots/ pants in order to take a shit when in a rush.

Do it the westie way: http://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/showpost.php?p=1272798&postcount=27

:lol:

[trump-lady]

wow........

[scumdog]

It's the farts that worry me - make for some interesting riding trying to let one rip on a cruiser (everybody just thinks I'm stretching my legs)- d'you sprotsbike riders have an easier job of this???

[Usarka]

no sportsbike position is similar to asian squat toilets.

even if it is just a fart u often need to do the old finger test at the next stop to make sure theres no solids (or liquids)

[SwanTiger]

no sportsbike position is similar to asian squat toilets.

even if it is just a fart u often need to do the old finger test at the next stop to make sure theres no solids (or liquids)
Yes, I have experienced this situation as well, it is extremely distressing letting a little bit slip during a fart.

[skidMark]

Excuse me, this is a relevant topic that directly relates to every single motorcyclist, regardless of their chosen machine, age, race, gender or in skidMark's case, species.


CUNNNNNNTTTTTTTTTT

[skidMark]

wow........


about covers it really dunnit....

[skidMark]

Do it the westie way: http://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/showpost.php?p=1272798&postcount=27

:lol:


oh now thats just nasty.

[SwanTiger]

CUNNNNNNTTTTTTTTTT
Oh! the truth hurts, doesn't it darling :weep:


about covers it really dunnit....
Say something slightly more intelligent with a tad more depth, then we can enter in a pointless internet-style argument, at the moment you're uncessarily consuming bandwidth and taking up precious storage space.

[motorbyclist]

Do it the westie way: http://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/showpost.php?p=1272798&postcount=27


i knew that would be mentioned here somewhere


so for the record, sportbikes do not have an ideal seating position for those experiencing "gastro-intestinal problems", and yes, bike pants are way too difficult to remove when you're in a hurry

[skidMark]

Oh! the truth hurts, doesn't it darling :weep:


Say something slightly more intelligent with a tad more depth, then we can enter in a pointless internet-style argument, at the moment you're uncessarily consuming bandwidth and taking up precious storage space.


and ur using oxygen better used by a child in africa...ohhhh mega burnz!

[Pancakes]

It's the farts that worry me - make for some interesting riding trying to let one rip on a cruiser (everybody just thinks I'm stretching my legs)- d'you sprotsbike riders have an easier job of this???

Yep, the ol' stand up. It's the smell in the air-tight pants that worries me.

[Blue Velvet]

Swanny mate,in your case i think shit coming out your anus is the least of your worrys.Wipe your chin.

:killingme :killingme :killingme

[Blue Velvet]

Do it the westie way: http://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/showpost.php?p=1272798&postcount=27

:lol:

That was one of the funniest things I've read in ages.

:clap: