ukbandit
4th December 2007, 10:00
i thought i would share this with you lovely people:niceone:
>
> A teacher gave her class of 11 year olds an assignment. It was to get
> their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it. The
> next day the kids came back and one by one
> began to tell their stories.
>
>
>
>
>
> Karl said, "My father's a farmer and we have a lot of egg laying
> chooks. One time we were taking our eggs to market in a basket on the
> front seat of the car when we hit a big bump in the road and all the
> eggs went flying and broke and made a mess."
>
>
> "What's the moral of the story?" asked the teacher.
>
> "Don't put all your eggs in one basket!"
>
> "Very good," said the teacher.
>
> Next little Emilie raised her hand and said, "Our family are farmers
> too. But we raise chooks for the meat market. One day we had a dozen
> eggs, but when they hatched we only got ten live chicks, and the moral
> to this story
> is: 'Don't count your chickens before they're hatched'."
>
>
> "That was a fine story Emilie.
>
> Johnny, do you have a story to share?"
>
> "Yes. My dad told me this story about my Aunty Sharon. Aunty Sharon
> was a flight engineer on a plane in the Gulf War and her plane got
> hit.
> She had to bail out over enemy territory and all she had was three
> bottles of rum, a machine gun and a machete. She drank all the rum on
> the way down so they wouldn't break and then she landed right in the
> middle of 100 enemy troops.
> She killed seventy of them with the machine gun until she ran out of
> bullets. Then she killed twenty more with the machete until the blade
> broke. And then she killed the last ten with her bare hands."
>
>
> "Good heavens," said the horrified teacher, "what kind of moral did
> your father tell you from that horrible story?"
>
> "Stay the f*** away from Aunty Sharon when she's been on the piss."
>
> A teacher gave her class of 11 year olds an assignment. It was to get
> their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it. The
> next day the kids came back and one by one
> began to tell their stories.
>
>
>
>
>
> Karl said, "My father's a farmer and we have a lot of egg laying
> chooks. One time we were taking our eggs to market in a basket on the
> front seat of the car when we hit a big bump in the road and all the
> eggs went flying and broke and made a mess."
>
>
> "What's the moral of the story?" asked the teacher.
>
> "Don't put all your eggs in one basket!"
>
> "Very good," said the teacher.
>
> Next little Emilie raised her hand and said, "Our family are farmers
> too. But we raise chooks for the meat market. One day we had a dozen
> eggs, but when they hatched we only got ten live chicks, and the moral
> to this story
> is: 'Don't count your chickens before they're hatched'."
>
>
> "That was a fine story Emilie.
>
> Johnny, do you have a story to share?"
>
> "Yes. My dad told me this story about my Aunty Sharon. Aunty Sharon
> was a flight engineer on a plane in the Gulf War and her plane got
> hit.
> She had to bail out over enemy territory and all she had was three
> bottles of rum, a machine gun and a machete. She drank all the rum on
> the way down so they wouldn't break and then she landed right in the
> middle of 100 enemy troops.
> She killed seventy of them with the machine gun until she ran out of
> bullets. Then she killed twenty more with the machete until the blade
> broke. And then she killed the last ten with her bare hands."
>
>
> "Good heavens," said the horrified teacher, "what kind of moral did
> your father tell you from that horrible story?"
>
> "Stay the f*** away from Aunty Sharon when she's been on the piss."