What do you know (update):

[Big Dave]

Q: What do you know?


Eggs don't bounce

There's no bones in tripe

You can't close a revolving door

A smith and wesson beats four aces.

One hole on my watch band gets all the action.

[Sully60]

You can't ride a menstrual cycle.

And chocolate fish don't swim.

[MyGSXF]

Kids don't come with an instruction manual.. or a remote control that has a pause, off or mute button... :laugh:

[jrandom]

You can't ride a menstrual cycle.

:confused:

I must have missed that memo...

[Disco Dan]

Clutch lever wont engage the brake.

Chewing on a battery to get more charge out of it only hurts your teeth.

Leaving a dehumidifier on for over 12 hours is a cruel way to kill all your house plants.

[Disco Dan]

All KB women are NOT all bitches... the others are in fact witches.

[Sully60]

:confused:

I must have missed that memo...

Sorry that memo was actually superseded by the “Sail the red tide at your own discretion” memo.

Which brings me to the next thing I know:
The man who sails the red tide is only permitted to use that port for the next week, all other ports during this period will be closed!

[Swoop]

Horse floats' don't.

Steam rollers don't roll steam.

[007XX]

Kids don't come with an instruction manual.. or a remote control that has a pause, off or mute button... :laugh:

...and men are kids who never grew up...:laugh:

[Disco Dan]

"Stewardesses" is the longest word typed with only the left hand

And "lollipop" is the longest word typed with your right hand. (Bet you tried this out mentally, didn't you?)



No word in the English language rhymes with month, orange, silver, or purple.



"Dreamt" is the only English word that ends in the letters "mt".? (Are you doubting this?)





Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing.



The sentence: "The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog" uses every letter of the alphabet. (Now, you KNOW you're going to try this out for accuracy, right?)





The words 'racecar,' 'kayak' and 'level' are the same whether they are read left to right or right to left (palindromes). (Yep, I knew you were going to "do" this one.)



There are only four words in the English language which end in "dous": tremendous, horrendous, stupendous, and hazardous. (You're not doubting this, are you?)



There are two words in the English language that have all five vowels in order: "abstemious" and "facetious." (Yes, admit it, you are going to say, a e i o u)


TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard. (All you typists are going to test this out)



A cat has 32 muscles in each ear.





A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds. (Some days that's about what my memory span is.)



A "jiffy" is an actual unit of time for 1/100th of a second.





A shark is the only fish that can blink with both eyes.




A snail can sleep for three years. (I know some people that could do this too.!)


Almonds are a member of the peach family.




An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.






Babies are born without kneecaps. They don't appear until the child reaches 2 to 6 years of age.




February 1865 is the only month in recorded history not to have a full moon.




In the last 4,000 years, no new animals have been domesticated.





If the population of China walked past you, 8 abreast, the line would never end because of the rate of reproduction.






Leonardo Da Vinci invented the scissors






Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite!





Rubber bands last longer when refrigerated.


The average person's left hand does 56% of the typing.




The cruise liner, QE 2, moves only six inches for each gallon of diesel that it burns.



The microwave was invented after a researcher walked by a radar tube and a chocolate bar melted in his pocket. (Good thing he did that.)




The winter of 1932 was so cold that Niagara Falls froze completely solid.



There are more chickens than people in the world.



Winston Churchill was born in a ladies' room during a dance.



Women blink nearly twice as much as men.

[MSTRS]

Baby sitters don't (usually) sit on babies.

[Number One]

Our eyes are always the same size from birth

Umm - I'm sure this bit is a myth...as I AND my boy weren't/aren't able to have IOL's implanted in our eyes until we had/have fully grown. Not just down to rejection/infection/immunity factors apparently according to surgeon due also to our "changing eye size and shape" as we grow.

[Krayy]

Helen Clarke is a bitch...

...so is Sue Bradford

...oh, and Jeanette Fitzsimons

[Qkchk]

"Stewardesses" is the longest word typed with only the left hand

.......

Women blink nearly twice as much as men.

And Disco knows how to use Google

[Laava]

Hedgehogs don't hog hedges
Kiwis don't fit small locks

[Bren]

“I hear nothing, I see nothing, I know nothing!”
“I see nothing, nothing!”

Shultz from Hogans Heroes....one of my all time favorite tv series!

[jafar]

Shoplifters don't lift shops

[rwh]

"Stewardesses" is the longest word typed with only the left hand

longest equal:


richard@diamond:~$ perl -n -e 'print if /^[qwertasdfgzxcvb]{12,50}$/' /usr/share/dict/words
aftereffects
desegregated
desegregates
reverberated
reverberates
stewardesses



And "lollipop" is the longest word typed with your right hand. (Bet you tried this out mentally, didn't you?)

not quite:


richard@diamond:~$ perl -n -e 'print if /^[yuiophjklnm]{8,50}$/' /usr/share/dict/words
lollipop
lollypop
monopoly
nonunion
polonium
polyphony


Depends how you type, of course, but those are the letters/hand I was taught.


"Dreamt" is the only English word that ends in the letters "mt".? (Are you doubting this?)

Apart from 'daydreamt'


There are only four words in the English language which end in "dous": tremendous, horrendous, stupendous, and hazardous. (You're not doubting this, are you?)

And 'nonhazardous'



There are two words in the English language that have all five vowels in order: "abstemious" and "facetious." (Yes, admit it, you are going to say, a e i o u)



richard@diamond:~$ perl -n -e 'print if /a.*e.*i.*o.*u/' /usr/share/dict/words
abstemious
adventitious
facetious
facetiously
facetiousness
facetiousness's
sacrilegious

(yes, I know you didn't say 'only' this time)


TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard. (All you typists are going to test this out)

longest equal:


richard@diamond:~$ perl -n -e 'print if /^[qwertyuiop]{10,50}$/' /usr/share/dict/words
perpetuity
proprietor
repertoire
typewriter


Richard
[edit: yes, I forgot about the {n,} syntax]

[Qkchk]

Kiwi's eat roots shoots and leaves :whistle:

[Hitcher]

No word in the English language rhymes with month

What happened there then? Silly cunth.

[YellowDog]

Faaaark - Nowt's original these days.

[Mully]

The other line always move faster.

[gatch]

Man who fishes in other mans well, only catches crabs..

Man who stand on toilet is, high on pott.

Man who stands with hands in pocketsis, feeling a little cocky.

[ynot slow]

Why do 24hour petrol stations have door locks.

[Mully]

Man who walk through airport door sideways going to Bangkok

Man who have sex in graveyard fucking near dead

[nadroj]

Lady who take tin of biscuits to bed is fucking crackers!

[cheviot]

nothing suceeds like a budgie without any teeth.

[geestring]

All KB women are NOT all bitches... the others are in fact witches.

hay, you havnt met me, not a witch, wasnt allowed a broom stick, ha ha.;)

[Eurodave]

Boys will be boys
& Girls will be mothers

[Genestho]

What do you know about tweetle beetles? Well...

When tweetle beetles fight,
it's called a tweetle beetle battle.

And when they battle in a puddle,
it's a tweetle beetle puddle battle.

AND when tweetle beetles battle with paddles in a puddle,
they call it a tweetle beetle puddle paddle battle.

AND...

When beetles battle beetles in a puddle paddle battle
and the beetle battle puddle is a puddle in a bottle...
...they call this a tweetle beetle bottle puddle paddle battle muddle.

AND...

When beetles fight these battles in a bottle with their paddles
and the bottle's on a poodle and the poodle's eating noodles...
...they call this a muddle puddle tweetle poodle beetle noodle
bottle paddle battle.

:crazy: (And no I didn't type it all out!!)

[scumdog]

When a vehicle pulls out of a side-street or drive-way on front of you the amount it inconveniences you is generally linked to the distance it will travel along the road on front of you.:wacko:

If it causes you to pull a stoppie it will mostly turn off at the next side-road

If you barely have to slow it will carry on for miles on front of you before turning off.

TRUE!

[kevfromcoro]

the average mans penis is 6 inches long

where a womens vagina is able to accomadate 9 inches.

In Auckland alone ,, there is 3.5ks of cunt going to waste

[White trash]

Can't drown a rat in horse spew.

[naphazoline]

You don't get steel wool from a hydraulic ram.

(If you do,you better hit the big red button.)

[slofox]

The oldest known goldfish lived to 41 years of age. Its name was Fred.

[scorpious]

A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds. (Some days that's about what my memory span is.)

.

incorrect. A friend of mine did an experiment and found they had memory of at least a month. Won quite a bit of money for that too lol :first:

[James Deuce]

You can't close a revolving door



Aaron Slight can get a push chair complete with optional baby through them though.

[James Deuce]

In Auckland alone ,, there is 3.5ks of cunt going to waste

Most of them post on KB.

Only some of them are good.

[cheviot]

The oldest known goldfish lived to 41 years of age. Its name was Fred.

I bought a new goldfish for a pet last week, it turns out it's epileptic. Mind you it seems to be fine when I put it back in the bowl.

[burden2]

Hedgehogs don't hog hedges
Steam rollers don't roll steam
Ocean Liners don't line the ocean (except for a small bit of the Atlantic Ocean floor occupied by the Titanic)
Paper boys aren't made of paper-but they do fold up like last nights Herald when ya hit the air horn after rolling quietly up behind them...............or so I have heard.

[jafar]

The more you know the more you know you don't know

[riffer]

Your stomach has to produce a new layer of mucus every two weeks or it will digest itself.

The Sanskrit word for "war" means "desire for more cows."

Clans of long ago that wanted to get rid of their unwanted people without killing them used to burn their houses down - hence the expression "to get fired."

Canada is an Indian word meaning "Big Village."

Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the US Treasury.

First novel ever written on a typewriter: Tom Sawyer.

The Hawaiian alphabet has 12 letters.

Iceland consumes more Coca-Cola per capita than any other nation.

It is possible to lead a cow upstairs but not downstairs.

Only one person in two billion will live to be 116 or older.

Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite.

Smartest dogs: 1) Scottish border collie; 2)Poodle; 3) Golden retriever. Dumbest: Afghan hound.

The longest recorded flight of a chicken is thirteen seconds.

The national anthem of Greece has 158 verses.

The youngest pope was 11 years old.

There are more chickens than people in the world.

There are 293 ways to make change for a dollar.

[gatch]

Yellow snow is NOT banana flavored.

[98tls]

The transition from living in Auckland to death is barely noticeable.:whistle: