Riding in godzone. The whinge.

[martybabe]

I'm a Pom right and it's in my nature to whinge. Actually that's not at all true of me, if you read my stuff it's mostly taking the piss out of myself or raving about this beautiful country or the brilliant ride I've just had.

So I thought I'd revert to the stereotype and have a little moan, please join in and get it off your chest, you know you wanna.

So what mars riding in godzone for you. Is it the anti fling chain lube that flings as far and wide as it's possible to fling.I think it's a given that the cage drivers who's sole purpose in life seems to be to go out and flatten one of us would be number one on the list, so we'll ignore them for now.

My gripe of the month is this. The invisible chinese restaurant owner that flings the chow mein and egg foo yung leftovers all over me and the bike every single time I go out. Man you got some bugs in this country. Joseph and the amazing technicolour bug splattered yuk coat,thats me. I got legs and wings, eyeballs and assholes, stingers and lime green intestines aplenty. :sick: :laugh:

A simple trip to the gas station and I return looking like I've been paintballing, the red team are clear winners but the puke yellow and lime green puss teams are ever present. :D

On the plus side I guess it's the beautiful Autumn weather that brought out these suicidal multi legged maniacs. Viva la full face helmet.

There, I feel better. So what puts a downer on your ride? :niceone:

[Badjelly]

Must be a 'naki thing :innocent:

[martybabe]

mm, perhaps a naki bike thing.

[MyGSXF]

Speaking of bug splattered.. I recently cleaned my jacket.. haven't done it for quuuuuuiiiite some time... :rolleyes: & boy, were they stuck! :doh:

I learnt that if you spray them with some 'Pledge' & leave it to soak for a while.. it lifts them little bugga's right off!! :banana: & then.. if ya turn the cloth over & rub a bit more.. it brings ya jacket up real puuurdy lookin! :2thumbsup

oh.. & my downer would be.. when I finally get a chance to bugger off on my bike & have a weekend away from being "mum".. & then it goes & rains! :crybaby:

[martybabe]

Speaking of bug splattered.. I recently cleaned my jacket.. haven't done it for quuuuuuiiiite some time... :rolleyes: & boy, were they stuck! :doh:

I learnt that if you spray them with some 'Pledge' & leave it to soak for a while.. it lifts them little bugga's right off!! :banana: & then.. if ya turn the cloth over & rub a bit more.. it brings ya jacket up real puuurdy lookin! :2thumbsup

oh.. & my downer would be.. when I finally get a chance to bugger off on my bike & have a weekend away from being "mum".. & then it goes & rains! :crybaby:

:clap: oh yes,the classic ,rain on my parade, just got the bike all debugged, been granted leave of absence from her indoors and here it comes, spitter splatter..fuggin deluge.

Hey thanks for the Pledge tip.them sons o bitches are half super glue half blue tack, with wings. :niceone:

[98tls]

Camper vans on the wrong side of the road,like the one that tried to splatter me all over his grille going to the woodstock rally,that and anyone that uses a cellphone whilst driving,for some reason its the overweight females with orrible perms that annoy me the most.:argue:

[MyGSXF]

been granted leave of absence from her indoors and here it comes, spitter splatter..fuggin deluge.

Bugger dude.. that bloody Murphy huh!! :bash: he's also responsible for these things too..

http://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/showthread.php?p=1073871#post1073871





Hey thanks for the Pledge tip.them sons o bitches are half super glue half blue tack, with wings. :niceone:

That, they certainly are.. :pinch: no probs.. :niceone: after 16 YEARS worth of riding bug splattered, I just learnt bout it a month ago.. :whistle:

Jen :rockon:

[martybabe]

Camper vans on the wrong side of the road,like the one that tried to splatter me all over his grille going to the woodstock rally,that and anyone that uses a cellphone whilst driving,for some reason its the overweight females with orrible perms that annoy me the most.:argue:

:laugh: Hadn't really looked for a 'type' of cell phone user,they scare the shit outa me whatever they look like, but O shall be more aware of the perm in future.:lol:


Bugger dude.. that bloody Murphy huh!! :bash: he's also responsible for these things too..

http://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/showthread.php?p=1073871#post1073871






That, they certainly are.. :pinch: no probs.. :niceone: after 16 YEARS worth of riding bug splattered, I just learnt bout it a month ago.. :whistle:

Jen :rockon:

Oh thats a cool thread. :killingme wont let me bling ya. catch ya tmorrow. :niceone:

[madandy]

Slow drivers who hog the centre line, creating a long que, all the tossers who wont use more than 30% throttle to pass the slow bastard, leave no room between them and the bumper of the car in front and force us to threaten the lives of thousands by exceeding the legal limit for a few seconds to get past the lot of the stupid twats in one go.

[martybabe]

Slow drivers who hog the centre line, creating a long Que, all the tossers who wont use more than 30% throttle to pass the slow bastard, leave no room between them and the bumper of the car in front and force us to threaten the lives of thousands by exceeding the legal limit for a few seconds to get past the lot of the stupid twats in one go.

Your absolutely right, It's one of the biggest differences I've noticed since I've been here. cagers bunch up behind a slow moving anything so it's impossible to overtake in stages as you would in the UK. so your forced to sit there for an eternity or overtake a whole bunch in one go, neither prospect very appealing.Then you reach a two lane bit and the aforementioned slow bastard takes off like a scolded cat. why?? is he trying to make the end of the two lane bit first so everyone has to sit behind him again,what the heck is that all about ! :gob:

[puddytat]

The paranoia of wondering if every oncoming late model Holden Commodore is really a mufti...

[MaxB]

Its like cagers would rather have a head on smash overtaking at 105 than making a crisp pass up to say 120 for an instant.

They hang out on oncoming traffic for a hell of a long time hoping for the best.

[xwhatsit]

The paranoia of wondering if every oncoming late model Holden Commodore is really a mufti...

Hahaha yes. Then again, I am prone to plain-clothes-paranoia :laugh:

[martybabe]

Its like cagers would rather have a head on smash overtaking at 105 than making a crisp pass up to say 120 for an instant.

They hang out on oncoming traffic for a hell of a long time hoping for the best.

It so is,I thought I was the only one that thought that. If ya see what I mean. :shutup:

[MyGSXF]

Its like cagers would rather have a head on smash overtaking at 105 than making a crisp pass up to say 120 for an instant. They hang out on oncoming traffic for a hell of a long time hoping for the best.


I thought I was the only one that thought that :shutup:

lols.. meee tooo.. :lol: it seems you both read my mind... :shifty:

I pass in the car.. like I do when I'm on the bike... a quick squirt on the pedal to get past, then get back in.. ;)

[martybabe]

Well I thought this thread would be full of, gravel,roadworks,oilspills,wet tar, ciggy butts, women drivers,men drivers,trucks etc'

It would appear some stereotypes are accurate. Kiwis do appear to be laid back and not so prone to whinging as erhmm other people. Good onya :clap:

As I said in the first post though, some cage driving will prompt a whinge outta anybody. :yes:

:scratch: ere, someone seems to have vacuumed up my bling thing.

What is the world comming to. B movie sized bugs and bling knickers. :blink:

[jrandom]

The bugs aren't just a 'naki thing. Plenty of the suckers up here.

Had a wasp fly into my neck on the weekend and give me a whack with its stinger above the collarbone as I was riding south on SH22. Little bastard. What'd it want to do that for?

It got its comeuppance, though, as I slowed down and started frantically bashing at myself in an effort to kill whatever the hell had just flown into my open jacket collar and started having a go at me.

Couple of hours later we were pulled up and one of the other riders goes "er, dude, there's half a wasp stuck to your T-shirt..."

Nowhere near as bad as bee stings, though.

I reckon I'll start buttoning my collar up on the open road now.

Got hit by a motherfucker of a moth in the neck once, too, riding in the dark on SH12 just out of Dargaville. Those things weigh a ton.

Just one of the hassles of riding a sit-up-straight bike, I guess.

[jrandom]

OK, you know what else I hate?

I hate 'borrowing' my toothbrush for cleaning purposes and ending up with it covered in kerosene and grease, intending to go buy myself a new one, not making it to the supermarket for two nights in a row and having to go to sleep with a furry mouth.

Not sure if that's a New Zealand-specific issue, though.

Maybe another beer will help?

[onearmedbandit]

Rutted up roads on the hills in summer. The road to Akaroa is bliss, but on a hot summers day the road at the top is that hot the tar has melted and larger vehicles push it up into ruts. It's used a lot by stock trucks which are particularly nasty on the surface.

[martybabe]

OK, you know what else I hate?

I hate 'borrowing' my toothbrush for cleaning purposes and ending up with it covered in kerosene and grease, intending to go buy myself a new one, not making it to the supermarket for two nights in a row and having to go to sleep with a furry mouth.

Not sure if that's a New Zealand-specific issue, though.

Maybe another beer will help?

:laugh: a laugh to go to bed on. Cheers mate. hey cute kid on the photo. don't even know where i saw it now. some thread or other. :drinkup:

[mister.koz]

I completely agree with that passing bit before.... pisses me off, im a fairly conservative cage driver so i wont pass unless its real clear but i would rather be out for a couple of secs at 120 that take up a WHOLE passing lane run to get past one car at 101

I hate it when you pull your breaks apart in the kitchen cause the shed has no light, then your left to clean out the calipers with the dishbrush cause there are no other non-tooth brushes around, then forgetting about the cleaning it with some thinners thing, then of course 1/2 asleep the next morning washing yesterday's coffee scum out of your favourite coffee cup and sitting down to a ciggie and a nice cup of thinners tasting coffee :(

[martybabe]

I completely agree with that passing bit before.... pisses me off, im a fairly conservative cage driver so i wont pass unless its real clear but i would rather be out for a couple of secs at 120 that take up a WHOLE passing lane run to get past one car at 101

I hate it when you pull your breaks apart in the kitchen cause the shed has no light, then your left to clean out the calipers with the dishbrush cause there are no other non-tooth brushes around, then forgetting about the cleaning it with some thinners thing, then of course 1/2 asleep the next morning washing yesterday's coffee scum out of your favourite coffee cup and sitting down to a ciggie and a nice cup of thinners tasting coffee :(


:sick::laugh:

[vfxdog]

Kiwi car drivers are generally appalling. Worst thing is that they/we think they're Denny Hulme or Chris Amon, even though they don't know who they are. Bugwise, a journey out of Whitianga following two lumbering Landcruisers towing trailers stacked with active beehives was horrendous. There were literally thousands of bees pouring out of those hives as these clowns crawled down the road; their combined length and far from sensible pace making an overtake a bit tricky, not to mention the prospect of being stung (again) in mid-pass. Shouldn't there be a law against that kind of bee handling?

[HornetBoy]

here it comes :

Ive come to accept its a part of new zealand roads but i still have to moan about it ,but the random pot holes and gravel sections really piss me off ! especially when they are not sign posted :Oi: and you come around the corner and suddenly the rear comes out :buggerd:have had some people say it adds to the excitement ....hmmm

AND ..... The cagers that sit at 95kph then when you hit a passing lane and when you try to overtake you end up having to do 130ph just to pass em cause they have put their foot down suddenly :rolleyes:

and when you hit newly tarsealed road and all the stones flick up and fountain over you and all over the bike,sometimes its probly the equivilent of 10-20kg of stones under the hugger and stuck between the motor etc lol:shit:

Ah well at least we dont have internationals driving on the wrong side of that road.... :slap:

[The Pastor]

Two things stop me from having a good ride.

lack of money for gas. (no ride no good)

cops (dont like walking home)

[The Pastor]

Kiwi car drivers are generally appalling. Worst thing is that they/we think they're Denny Hulme or Chris Amon, even though they don't know who they are. Bugwise, a journey out of Whitianga following two lumbering Landcruisers towing trailers stacked with active beehives was horrendous. There were literally thousands of bees pouring out of those hives as these clowns crawled down the road; their combined length and far from sensible pace making an overtake a bit tricky, not to mention the prospect of being stung (again) in mid-pass. Shouldn't there be a law against that kind of bee handling?
lol. thats funny :D I bet you got a real buzz out of that!

[BUNGY]

The cagers that sit at 95kph then when you hit a passing lane and when you try to overtake you end up having to do 130ph just to pass em cause they have put their foot down suddenly :rolleyes:


It seems they have a big ego problem. Im sure they know they are holding everyone up but being passed is probably proof they are a slow driver so they try not to let it happen.

[terbang]

Doing a Coro loop a wee while back with Barbender and Beyond. There were clouds of bees all over the place and they seemed to be getting thicker. With the lads starting to feel a bit targeted and checking for honey (or similar) smeared over our leathers, we discoverd, followed by a lot of smeary looking cars (windows wound up), a beekeeper driving his truck loaded with bee hives! A few rapid overtakes and they were a thing of the past... Or so we thought. A little later, stopped for a cuppa at a roadside and scraping all sorts of carnage from our gear, bugger it, the beekeeper drove by again. Those bees had lots of yellow custard in them that gave my riding gear a new styling. Mind you it would have probably blended in fine with most modern sport bikes. I propose that we petition to have beekeepers banned from our highways.

[vifferman]

The generally low standard of driving is generally a piss-off, but the one that annoys me the most is people who look, see you coming, then pull out anyway.
I had an old crone do it the other day, so I flicked my lights on highbeam, and followed illegally closely. However, it kinda backfired on me, as when she turned right (east), she suddenly discovered she couldn't see, and turned the windscreen washers on (another piss-off), so I got a nice wash. :blank:
I don't think she even noticed me the whole time, until I passed her.

Ach weil...
I got much wetterer today, when I didn't realise it was raining, so set out with my summer gloves on, the vents on my pants undone (they don't actually let water in, but it was cold), and the leather doodah that covers up the mesh on the front, neck and collar of my jacket off. (It was in the pocket on the back, but a fat lot of good that did!)
But (however), thanks to NikWax, no water got in anywhere. The stupid thing is I've taken the car every day this week, then on the first wet day, I take the bike. :buggerd:
But even a wet ride is good for the soul. :yes:

[martybabe]

Yeah. that's better. whingeings good for the soul, a release mechanism, a safety valve........as long as you know when to stop eh.

How about a multi kilometre, multi two section truck over taking manouver, I'm talking perhaps 20 mins to negotiate the queue safely, then bingo, your out front at last. Amongst the euphoria and the mental back patting you notice the petrol gauge flashing and you just know you aint gonna put enough distance between you and the queue to fill up and come out still ahead.:doh:

So you've gotta do the whole fugging thing again! with the gravel and the cow piss and the swinging trailers and the yard yarda yarda. :mad:

[Edbear]

Well, all I can say, ('cause I can..), is that riding a C50T means a nice big windscreen for the bugs and stones and rain, nice big mudguards for the road slush, torque to ride it like and automatic, room and comfort for the good lady on pillion with an intercom for gasbagging, a great exhaust note, light, easy handling with good economy, enough grunt for a quick overtaking maneuvers, good looking to attract admiring attention everywhere we go, utter reliability... :rolleyes:

I just can't seem to get wound up and angry when I'm out on the bike with the Missus on back. Even errant car drivers, are simply despatched with a twist of the wrist. I seem to be noticed by most of those I close in on and they pull left to allow me to pass which I do with a "thankyou" wave...:spudwave:

I know that the open road is an imperfect place and ride so's not to get caught out, though I have had a the odd moment.

Sorry, I really can't think of anything to whinge about... Must be the medication...:doctor:

[martybabe]

Well, all I can say, ('cause I can..), is that riding a C50T means a nice big windscreen for the bugs and stones and rain, nice big mudguards for the road slush, torque to ride it like and automatic, room and comfort for the good lady on pillion with an intercom for gasbagging, a great exhaust note, light, easy handling with good economy, enough grunt for a quick overtaking maneuvers, good looking to attract admiring attention everywhere we go, utter reliability... :rolleyes:

I just can't seem to get wound up and angry when I'm out on the bike with the Missus on back. Even errant car drivers, are simply dispatched with a twist of the wrist. I seem to be noticed by most of those I close in on and they pull left to allow me to pass which I do with a "thank you" wave...:spudwave:

I know that the open road is an imperfect place and ride so's not to get caught out, though I have had a the odd moment.

Sorry, I really can't think of anything to whinge about... Must be the medication...:doctor:

There's a happy man. Me too, I have a great time out there, just gassin about things that would make a bloody good ride bloody excellent by their omission. Nothing serious here just stuff that pisses you off a bit. :D

[MaxB]

Doing a Coro loop a wee while back with Barbender and Beyond. There were clouds of bees all over the place and they seemed to be getting thicker. With the lads starting to feel a bit targeted and checking for honey (or similar) smeared over our leathers, we discoverd, followed by a lot of smeary looking cars (windows wound up), a beekeeper driving his truck loaded with bee hives! A few rapid overtakes and they were a thing of the past... Or so we thought. A little later, stopped for a cuppa at a roadside and scraping all sorts of carnage from our gear, bugger it, the beekeeper drove by again. Those bees had lots of yellow custard in them that gave my riding gear a new styling. Mind you it would have probably blended in fine with most modern sport bikes. I propose that we petition to have beekeepers banned from our highways.

Similar thing happened to me at Ahipara on a Cape run. A wee truck and trailer pulled on me from a side road and I hit the horn, highbeam and brakes. The truck braked heavily in front of me upsetting a cloud of 'dust' from the trailer. I rode into a swarm of bees at a reasonable clip and I got splattered in juicy insects. They got everywhere, over the gear, inside the fairing, oil cooler and even inside the lockable compartment. I could not see through the screen. As I ripped past the driver I swear he was pissing himself with laughter. When I got to the Cape the sticky had mixed with the road dust to form a kind of grinding paste and some of the little buggers were still alive. I didn't get stung at all so I should count my blessings but I did end up getting a new visor.

Maybe its a good way to get off tickets, carry a hive of angry bees around in your ute?

[martybabe]

Ok, you two win, your bugs are nastier than mine. :shifty:

Is it common to cart such things round the country? sbloody scary.:confused:

[Lucy]

But even a wet ride is good for the soul. :yes:

As the actress said to the Bishop....

:eek: