If a drunk guy is trying to make you angry would you give in?

[TOTO]

OK so me and my team (Massey University Auckland) are here in rotoroa for the uni games and its all typical student week.
Alot of drinking, alot of random and weird stuff going on as well as guitar nights and crazy parties.
All this is cool. I've decided to stay in the backpackers to play pool and chill out on KB and get ready for our game tomorrow.
So we are just about to start playing pool with my friend, and prior to that cleaned the mess left by people who were playing Poker on that same pool table.
So we have spent like 5 minutes cleaning the space and getting ready to play.

There comes one quite drunk guy who was one of the poker players and says he wants to play doubles.
I would have been fine with that if he was not so drunk , but I would not have enjoyed playing with him. So I refused. I told him that he can play after us and so we startted on playing.
We finished our game , then he got to play with his mate - all sweet according to me.

After he finishes his game him and his mate leave and we start another game. That dude comes back in 5 minutes (still drinking) and starts talking shit how dumb we were not to play with him.
I ignore for good 5 minutes. After that he starts abusing my friend (who is asian) on race stuff. I go to him and tell him very politely that he is drunk and heeps on doing it. so me and my mate are trying to ignore him but its not working.:Oi:
Anyhow we managed to hold off violence till the end of the game but if we are in the same situation tomorrow and he still talks shit I will seriously think aboyt smashing him. I will get in trouble but it would be totally worth it. :angry2::mad::ar15:

Wondering how others cope with drunk abusive people when YOU are completely sober. And at what point do you stop tolerating medium abusive behaviour ?:weird:

Your taughts apprechiayed.

[Gubb]

I used to get problems when I went out with the boys, drunken idiots would pick on me and try to provoke a fight, purely because I was the biggest guy in the room. Guess they wanted to show their mates how tough they were.

Made a few bad decisions, won a few fights, lost a few too.

It's. Just. Not. Worth. It.

Ignore the cock, getting into a fight won't solve anything at all. Be the bigger man.

[skidMark]

Do not react whasoever do not attack do not do anything just ignore him as best as you can.

Now. If he throws first punch...

You have two choices.

Do not hit back..lay assault charge...

Hit back, he started it, self defence. At which point if it does end up with cops involved etc then you are in the clear as hes drunk, but swinging first punch at a drunk fella is gonig to get you in the shit.

Yes he was being a prick and i do not condone his behaviour, but quite alot of people do not realise how far they are pushing it when drunk.

[TOTO]

I used to get problems when I went out with the boys, drunken idiots would pick on me and try to provoke a fight, purely because I was the biggest guy in the room. Guess they wanted to show their mates how tough they were.

Made a few bad decisions, won a few fights, lost a few too.

It's. Just. Not. Worth. It.

Ignore the cock, getting into a fight won't solve anything at all. Be the bigger man.

wise words. I beleave I can hold off violence , but when I think how good I'd feel if I hit hel, I start evaluating the prospective of doing it again

[DarkLord]

That really sucks, dude. I know the feeling ay, you just feel the frustration boiling up inside you and you really want to smash his face in. Thing is if you strike him first, chances are he will do the best he can to use that against you. A lot of people who are screwed up enough to do that sort of thing in the first place are just selfish, manipulative bastards and will use whatever they can against whoever they decide. It's so tempting to kick his head in but it could end up with dire consequences for you, as unfair as that sounds.

I had some prick threaten me in a shopping mall the other day and sure I could have belted him but it would have all come back against me, so I chose to walk away and not make things bad for myself as much as I wanted to kill the bastard. I know it's frustrating but in all honesty I would consider that the best thing to do, if it's still really bothering you later find someone who won't mind you talking openly about it and getting it off your chest.

Hope this is of some help to you man.

Cheers

[TOTO]

Do not react whasoever do not attack do not do anything just ignore him as best as you can.

Now. If he throws first punch...

You have two choices.

Do not hit back..lay assault charge...

Hit back, he started it, self defence. At which point if it does end up with cops involved etc then you are in the clear as hes drunk, but swinging first punch at a drunk fella is gonig to get you in the shit.

Yes he was being a prick and i do not condone his behaviour, but quite alot of people do not realise how far they are pushing it when drunk.

O yea true , about not knowing where to stop wjen you drunk. Fair Comment Mark. Thanks.

[Dino]

Well done for walking away - If you see him in the morning be polite but make sure you talk REALLY LOUD :lol:

.

[TOTO]

Well done for walking away - If you see him in the morning be polite but make sure you talk REALLY LOUD :lol:

.

May do that Loud talking. That will give me withnesses :)

[Nagash]

Haha.. err.. i'm usually a lover not a fighter but when i'm with me mates..

Drunk guy starts abusing me or my mates i'll very clearly express my views that I want him to go away, if he persists violence tends to come into play pretty quickly..

I honestly can't stand piss heads..

[TOTO]

I honestly can't stand piss heads..

me too. O have nothing against people drinking as much as they want but if they do not come close or in contact with me. Like huba guba said because we big guys attract attention people wanna prove they are men by challenging us...anyhow. that cont has gone to the bar so I'm sweet for tonight :)

[Gubb]

I'm not a fighter, I prefer emotional terrorism.

[mowgli]

Find out where he's sleeping and leave him a little present for when he gets back from the bar. Revenge is best served warm :)

[Mom]

OK so me and my team (Massey University Auckland) are here in rotoroa ...

Your taughts apprechiayed.

Where is rotoroa?

I dont have any taughts apart from, perhaps you need to use a dictionary to spell check your posts?


PS: Crazy taught here, have you been drinking too?

[Gubb]

Where is rotoroa?

I dont have any taughts apart from, perhaps you need to use a dictionary to spell check your posts?


PS: Crazy taught here, have you been drinking too?

Have you been drinking too Mommy?

[Mom]

Have you been drinking too Mommy?

Um no, but you obviously dont see the deliberate spelling mistake I made in a poor attempt to highlight the OP's spelling. Sorry, I should have used P/T to make it clear what I was doing.

[Ixion]

Where is rotoroa?

I dont have any taughts apart from, perhaps you need to use a dictionary to spell check your posts?


PS: Crazy taught here, have you been drinking too?

:rofl:

Ironically, Rotoroa Island, in the Hauraki Gulf is where the Sallies , for many many years, had their hostel for alcoholics!

[scracha]

If they're right in your face ask them to step back. If they don't, a swift Glasgow kiss followed by running like fuck seems to work well.

[MidnightMike]

PS: Crazy taught here, have you been drinking too?

I think he has, what a hypocrite. (p/t)


O yea true , about not knowing where to stop wjen you drunk. Fair Comment Mark. Thanks.

[Nagash]

Where is rotoroa?

I dont have any taughts apart from, perhaps you need to use a dictionary to spell check your posts?


PS: Crazy taught here, have you been drinking too?

Cultural insensitivity..

Unfortunately for such a motivated rider like Toto English isn't his first language.

So when he sets up a biker meeting at One Tree Hill and texts everyone One Used Hill lots of confusion erupts..

[Gubb]

I still get confused everytime I type 'bucklame' into my phone.

[cynna]

thru work i have dealt with many drunks while sober. best bet is to put them in a headlock and walk them outside, slam them against the wall and thats normally that....


but be prepared if that makes them worse

[Slicksta]

Personally i could probably handel it if they were picking on me but, picking on a mate with racist comments i would have told him to fuck off and if he didn't I would have cracked him one im not someone who is blessed with a long temper.

[ital916]

Hey todd, good on ya bro for keeping control. I know it's hard but it's the right thing. I would have struggled knowing me, I want to stay cool but when people get abusive I don't take it aye. Plus the fact that you had pool cues should have made him think twice.

Mom, I believe english is not the first language for todd?? *your bulgarian right todd, correct me if I am wrong* so maybe a little leeway for spelling? *cowers in fear lol*

[martybabe]

It's a hard one Toto,you can only play it as you see it at the time,I can excuse a lot of drunken behaviour, annoying as it is, because it's a way of diffusing my rather short temper by telling myself their drunk and what they are saying is just worthless drunken crap. It's funny though,when the abuse is targeted at someone I'm with I go all cave man and protective.

You did well to walk away bud,the consequences for the provoked are usually much worse than those for the pisshead instigators. Doesn't mean he didn't deserve a trip to shortland st though,just means your the better man. :apint:

[NOMIS]

grab a epmty beer and piss in it pretend to open it for him and go here you go mate enjoy. Then he will wana smack you when he tastes it and you can have your way with him.

[NOMIS]

But if it was me I wouldn't do a thing,

If it was me "a year ago" I'd quickly wrap that pool que around his head and think nothing of it.

[Tank]

Anyhow we managed to hold off violence till the end of the game but if we are in the same situation tomorrow and he still talks shit I will seriously think aboyt smashing him. I will get in trouble but it would be totally worth it. :angry2::mad::ar15:.

If you have to think about it - your probably not a fighter. Its either something you do at the time or not. Generally when it comes to something that 'requires' violence you don't think of consequences - you just do it.

You sound like a nice guy. The 'tough talk' about 'smashing' someone dosnt sit with the rest of your (online) persona.

If a pissed bloke comes over and annoys you - be the bigger and better man and just walk away.

[NOMIS]

If you have to think about it - your probably not a fighter. Its either something you do at the time or not. Generally when it comes to something that 'requires' violence you don't think of consequences - you just do it.

If a pissed bloke comes over and annoys you - be the bigger and better man and just walk away.


totally agree tank! bling!.

bless thoes who sin aginast you :-)

[martybabe]

If you have to think about it - your probably not a fighter. Its either something you do at the time or not. Generally when it comes to something that 'requires' violence you don't think of consequences - you just do it.

You sound like a nice guy. The 'tough talk' about 'smashing' someone doesnt sit with the rest of your (online) persona.

If a pissed bloke comes over and annoys you - be the bigger and better man and just walk away.


Absolutely Tank but you must agree even a saint has limits.My only digression from the path of righteousness was escorting the wife and another couple through town after a night out.Two big drunken bastards walked up to my mates wife and gobbed,sorry UK,spat a huge greeny right in her face and down her beautiful dress,totally unprovoked we hadn't said anything or even looked in their direction. What do ya do mate, how the hecky peck can you walk away from that? Especially as it was clearly a provocative prelude to further abhorrent aggrovation.

[Jimmy B]

Absolutely Tank but you must agree even a saint has limits.My only digression from the path of righteousness was escorting the wife and another couple through town after a night out.Two big drunken bastards walked up to my mates wife and gobbed,sorry UK,spat a huge greeny right in her face and down her beautiful dress,totally unprovoked we hadn't said anything or even looked in their direction. What do ya do mate, how the hecky peck can you walk away from that? Especially as it was clearly a provocative prelude to further abhorrent aggrovation.

Aside from the disgusting act and the rage you must have felt there is usually a bigger picture to be seen when shit like this goes down. To put it clearly they were provoking you to take action, they have done this before and its possible they had a number of allies nearby or were armed for when the shit went down. She was not the target. Personally I would get us all out of there and call the cops....or not...depends on the bigger picture

[martybabe]

Aside from the disgusting act and the rage you must have felt there is usually a bigger picture to be seen when shit like this goes down. To put it clearly they were provoking you to take action, they have done this before and its possible they had a number of allies nearby or were armed for when the shit went down. She was not the target. Personally I would get us all out of there and call the cops....or not...depends on the bigger picture


No argument,that's what I 'should' have done. :o

[Tank]

Absolutely Tank but you must agree even a saint has limits.My only digression from the path of righteousness was escorting the wife and another couple through town after a night out.Two big drunken bastards walked up to my mates wife and gobbed,sorry UK,spat a huge greeny right in her face and down her beautiful dress,totally unprovoked we hadn't said anything or even looked in their direction. What do ya do mate, how the hecky peck can you walk away from that? Especially as it was clearly a provocative prelude to further abhorrent aggrovation.

I wasn't saying 'always' walk away. I'm guessing that the original poster was not someone who got in fights very often.

What you mention above is rather different. If it was someone being an arse to the lady - As long as it wasn't incredibly obvious that we were being set up (which can happen) - Id do my very best to pummel the bastard - and to fuck with the consequences.

In short - if someone fights - they have to be willing to lose, and remember that even after winning they can still lose (bloody assault charges etc etc). I have lost on plenty of occasions (and some quite spectacularly) - but I have never been in a position where I had to go away, think about it, then decide that the next time I'd 'smash' the guy like the poster has done.

Its something that is more basic 'fight or flight' - if you cannot make the decision to fight there and then 100% (like it sounds you did above), then fighting is not the option for you and flight is the smarter choice (like for the original poster).

Probably as clear as mud - but there you go.

This is speaking as a guy with 3 assault charges, a GBH, an actual bodily harm, and a weapons charge (baseball bat), and had passport confiscated preventing me from travel for a wee while. I didn't mind a bit of stouch when I was a little younger - but even after winning the above I lost in the long run because with my US visas were a pain in the ass to get. My employer is now aware of them because they had to pay for lawyers etc etc.

Best advise for a nice young bloke like the original poster is to learn from others mistakes and If you can reasonably walk away.

[martybabe]

I wasn't saying 'always' walk away. I'm guessing that the original poster was not someone who got in fights very often.

What you mention above is rather different. If it was someone being an arse to the lady - As long as it wasn't incredibly obvious that we were being set up (which can happen) - Id do my very best to pummel the bastard - and to fuck with the consequences.

In short - if someone fights - they have to be willing to lose, and remember that even after winning they can still lose (bloody assault charges etc etc). I have lost on plenty of occasions (and some quite spectacularly) - but I have never been in a position where I had to go away, think about it, then decide that the next time I'd 'smash' the guy like the poster has done.

Its something that is more basic 'fight or flight' - if you cannot make the decision to fight there and then 100% (like it sounds you did above), then fighting is not the option for you and flight is the smarter choice (like for the original poster).

Probably as clear as mud - but there you go.

This is speaking as a guy with 3 assault charges, a GBH, an actual bodily harm, and a weapons charge (baseball bat), and had passport confiscated preventing me from travel for a wee while. I didn't mind a bit of stouch when I was a little younger - but even after winning the above I lost in the long run because with my US visas were a pain in the ass to get. My employer is now aware of them because they had to pay for lawyers etc etc.

Best advise for a nice young bloke like the original poster is to learn from others mistakes and If you can reasonably walk away.

Totally agree with everything your saying mate.As I did before,just making the point that everyone has a point beyond which they will not accept what is being unjustly thrown at them.It isn't always possible to walk away. You clearly understand that already. I don't like violence ,like most decent people and will do almost anything to avoid it but that night , the only time in 32 years of adulthood was the time I couldn't walk away.

Cheers Tank. :drinkup: Oh and for the record Toto,the original poster,is indeed as you sumised a blardy nice bloke imo.

[TOTO]

Cultural insensitivity..

Unfortunately for such a motivated rider like Toto English isn't his first language.

So when he sets up a biker meeting at One Tree Hill and texts everyone One Used Hill lots of confusion erupts..

Lol too true and so funny. Thanks Josh.

Na I'm not a "fighter" but you have to agree that there is a point when that stopt to matter. Well so far the drunk guy has not created trouble coz I havent met him today, but now all are back on the piss in the backpackers so I'll keep try not to mess to much with him. We'll see. Update will be posted if something goes down :)

I'm off to naked jelly wrestling competition now... :D

[martybabe]

Lol too true and so funny. Thanks Josh.

Na I'm not a "fighter" but you have to agree that there is a point when that stopt to matter. Well so far the drunk guy has not created trouble coz I havent met him today, but now all are back on the piss in the backpackers so I'll keep try not to mess to much with him. We'll see. Update will be posted if something goes down :)

I'm off to naked jelly wrestling competition now... :D

don't forget your camera..........for the jelly wrestling I mean not the drunken twat. :D

[karla]

Wondering how others cope with drunk abusive people when YOU are completely sober. And at what point do you stop tolerating medium abusive behaviour ?:weird:

You can't change a drunk - pity him for he knows no better.

When we are sober we have no excuse for behaving badly ourselves - well done taking control and walking away. Anger is a luxury, don't let him take up too much space in your head, he's not worth it. And I'm sure he's not worried about you, or even thinking about you.

I think it's important to look after ourselves first when dealing with an alcoholic - drunks have their own crosses to bear. They often want to be the centre of attention, so walking away takes away their power.

Good luck with the game ~ ! :jerry:

[Jimmy B]

I'm off to naked jelly wrestling competition now... :D

Toto, That comment is useless without pictures :rolleyes:

[ManDownUnder]

Best thing I ever saw was one of the boys simply walking over to him, talking quietly in his ear "I think you've had enough and it's time for you to go now"

The man in question had plenty of bouncing and similar experience to back it up but it wasn't needed. Just the dulcet tonesof polite words indirectly telling him that his mouth is about to break his nose...

[The Lone Rider]

I'd deck the mother ******* and leave my business card.

But seriously... have you not delt with some of the people on KB? Theres a few here who are like that even when they haven't been drinking.

Best ignore them, they aren't making themselves any friends.

It's a different matter if they take a swing at you though.

[firefighter]

youv'e got more patience than I do!