Gunnyrob's Beemer breaks again!!

[gunnyrob]

Well my faith in the legendary reliability of BMWs took a massive hit yesterday!!!

In the pre-dawn murk of Friday, 9 May, I listened to the weather report & decided to have a crack at attending the Cold Duck ralley at Waipawa.

Cos I'm a double hard wanna be adventure rider, I decided to take Mighty Max (My trusty Bavarian steely steed) through the Western Access in central Waikato, then West side of Lake Taupo, then round the mountains to Waiouru via National Park. Then it was the crowning glory, the Gentle Annie, otherwise known as the Taihape-Napier Road.

Off I went and up until Te Awamutu, the weather was shite. Buckets of rain even managed to penetrate the near impregnable outer layer of my flash riding jacket & soaked my cellphone (As I would find out later):blink:

Turning left at Kihikihi, the weather abated, the roads dried and all was cool. "This road would be a fantastic ride for the mob going to Turangi for Queens Birthday" I thought to myself as I swept past the dams toward Mangakino. (lots of straights, as in maximum velocity straights, sweepers and no cops.)

On a straight bit of road I passed an Air force van, recognised the driver, and gave him a cheery toot and wave before blasting off into the distance.:2thumbsup

Weather round the mountain looked like crap, so I headed down the desert road. I even passed a cop who was trickling along at 95kmh, passing him at a steady 100 in 5th gear. I stopped at the first eatery on the left in Waiouru (next to Subway) warmed up by the fire and had an excellent all day breakfast & coffee. Then I gassed up & set off for the Annie.

What a great road. The first 60 km is excellent (though narrow) well paved seal. Spectacular scenery especially around the Rangitikei River. I hit the gravel at a good pace, there's 60 km of that, and from what I saw it was hard pack dirt topped with pea gravel. On the GS, that means 80kmh on the straight bits, but 10kms into it, it all turned to custard:eek5:

[gunnyrob]

I was tackling a steep down hill when, over the gentle melody in my headset (Chemical Brothers) a high pitch metallic screech from Max's nether regions jarred me from my state of Motorcycling Nirvana.:shit:

A blip of the throttle did nothing else but increase the volume of the noise, so with an empty feeling in the pit of my stomach, I coasted to a halt near a work crew crushing gravel.

I shut him down, then started up again. Hmmm, engines going, so I pulled in the clutch.

"Screech"

I engaged first gear & let out the clutch

SCREEECH (and no forward movement)

"Well," I said. "I'm fucked"

And I was. I pulled out my cellphone. Through misty plastic it said "There's no network out here you dumb ass" And so I had to have a think about what to do next.

One of the work crew came over & asked what I was up to.

I told him.

"You're fucked" he said, and went back to work.

[gunnyrob]

Having been bailed out of a not quite so bad situation by the AA last year (go search for "BMW Broke Down), I again needed their help. I scratched a desperate note with all my details and flagged down a passing car. (the first for half an hour)

Luckily it was an Army Bloke going off to a sheep station further up the line. You can always trust fellow military folks, and after explaining my plight, I asked him to call the AA. "Make sure you tell them the bike is really busted and I need a recovery vehicle". He nodded, gave me a thumbs up, a smile, tooted and zoomed off.

2 hours later, I was pretty up to speed on how the gravel crew worked with the loaders, diggers & crushers. Next time I'll make sure I take a book.

Then the AA recovery truck from Taihape came around the corner! "You're a long way out" said the AA Dude, "what's wrong?"

I showed him.

"You're fucked!" he said, and we pushed Max on board his second AA tow truck within a year.

Back at Taihape Suzuki, we asked if they could help. "Through clenched teeth, sucking badly, they said, "Nah Mate, you're fucked. nearest BMW workshop is Hamilton."

"Hamilton?" I said, disbelievingly; "Man I'm fucked!"

The AA dude (who used to help organised the cold kiwi rally when it was the REAL cold Kiwi at 6 cross Army camp) "Oh well, lets get it back to my garage, and we'll come up with a plan"

So we did.......:banana:

[gunnyrob]

Friday. 5pm. Who owes me a REALLY big favour?

My Brother, Warren does!! (Known as KRAYY on the site)

Ring Ring!

KRAYY:"Hello, Warren speaking"

GUNNYROB: "Hey Warren, I'm in Taihape and my bike's fucked. Can you get a trailer & come and pick me up?"

K: :blink::eek5::wacko: "TAIHAPE? What are you doing in Taihape????)

Long story ensued.

K: "Right, I need to do some phone calls. Ring me back in half an hour."

K: (30 Mins later) "I'll pick you up TONIGHT in FROSTY's Van, make sure we can get access to the bike at night, YOU'RE DRIVING HOME"

GR: "I'd better get a Motel then!"

[MIXONE]

Similar noise and result from my K75 some time back.It was the brake pads worn out and an easy fix.However I was only a couple of kays from home which makes life easier.Good write up though.:clap:

[yungatart]

What a great road. The first 60 km is excellent (though narrow) well paved seal. Spectacular scenery especially around the Rangitikei River. I hit the gravel at a good pace, there's 60 km of that, and from what I saw it was hard pack dirt topped with pea gravel. On the GS, that means 80kmh on the straight bits, but 10kms into it, it all turned to custard:eek5:

It is pretty isolated country up there...you were lucky a car come along at all!
The gravel is only about 35 km long with a couple of km sealed in the middle, which is the actual Annie.

[gunnyrob]

I grabbed the Givi bag with my shower supplies and non riding clothes & found a cheap (affordable & adequate) room at the Taihape Motel. Opening the top box, I discovered the lid of my jar of instant coffee power had fallen off, so now all my clothes were coffee flavoured! :slap: Shower & Bed.

Eventually, the gravel crunching sound of a van hauling up outside the unit after a restless couple of hours meant help had arrived!:2thumbsup

"You cock" jibed Warren, " Cora's (His wife) not very happy with you!!"

We tried to look as innocent as two people could while manhandling a BMW into a van just off the main drag of Taihape at 2am on a saturday morning.

K: "Right, lets go, you're driving"

GR: "Sweet, we're gone"

Thus ensued 6 hours of man talk, bike talk, napping (passenger only) and coffee (Driver only)

The bike only fell over in the van once
K: "Ooops, maybe we SHOULD have gone up SH 1 instead of the twisty road!)

But other than a popped mirror all was good.

We dropped Max off at experience.

"Dear Dear" observed Sebastian, the mechanic. "That sounds like the clutch. If you're lucky, that will be the only thing wrong. If the gearbox input shaft is damaged, it will be VERY expensive."

"Dear Dear" Observed Gunnyrob. "How long till he's fixed?"

S: "At least a month, I'll call you with an estimate in a couple of weeks."

" Dear dear" I thought, "That's me pretty well fucked!"

[gunnyrob]

So, that's it until I get the damage report. As I type this, I've had about 2 hours sleep since 0500 yesterday, have ridden/driven 900+km & have been pretty stressed.

Don't know when Max will be back from the BMW hospital, but am waiting for his return with bated breath.

Such a day of contrasts, I was REALLY SO GETTING into the groove, all was clicking totally, then it just stopped. It could have been a lot worse, so I'm grateful it turned out the way it did.

So many thanks of mine go to the AA rep in Taihape (I'd still be there otherwise!;

FROSTY for making his van available for stranded KBers:rockon:

and KRAYY for being such an outstanding brother to go 950km out of his way to rescue a broken down BMW:first:

(Thanks too to his lovely wife Cora, who had to do without him for a night :yes:)

So, no more rides for a month & a bit. Missed the Cold Duck, but hopefully the trip to the Cold Kiwi won't be as eventful!

[FROSTY]

Ya forgot to mention the bit about Frostys van not having a heater :shutup:

[Disco Dan]

Ya forgot to mention the bit about Frostys van not having a heater :shutup:

I think your van needs a new number plate... turning into the local bike ay ;) ..everyones taking her out for a ride... "vanslut" or "bikewhore" :2thumbsup

[gunnyrob]

Ya forgot to mention the bit about Frostys van not having a heater :shutup:

Or A Radio! Thanks mate. It was choice of you to do that for us.

[Crasherfromwayback]

BMW's reputation for reliability comes from their simple old boxers of yester year, when compared to the other shit around at the time.

They are over priced piles of poo that have more serious mechanical 'issues' than ANY other brand of bike I know of.

And yes...I've worked in BMW Dealerships.

[Big Dave]

Bummer - Nicely writted though.

[chubby]

oooooh bugger me.

Fantastic read yet bummer. Feel sorry for you and trust the medical fees are not too high. Good luck.

Give that man a beer and too all concerned.

[Krayy]

Taihape, I mean FFS. Why couldn't it have shit itself in Hamilton. At least I would have had some sleep.

And now comes the brighter side...in joke form:

Cross-services joke
So the Navy and the Air Force decide to have a motorbike race from West Auckland to Mt Wellington (about 30km) to prove who has the best rider. The Navy puke shows up on a Nifty 50 and when his mates ask him why the heck he didn't come on a faster bike he replied "That's cool, cos the Air Force are sending Gunnyrob on his Beemer".

Haiku
Beemer broke again...
Reliability, ha!
Buy a Honda bro

Limerick
There was a young (and I use that term advisedly) born again biker
Whose tours took him hither and thither
His Beemer it broke
In a huge cloud of smoke
And his brother drove all night to f**kin' Taihape to save his ass!!!!

Lay into him folks!!!

[Manxman]

And now comes the brighter side...in joke form:

Cross-services joke
So the Navy and the Air Force decide to have a motorbike race from West Auckland to Mt Wellington (about 30km) to prove who has the best rider. The Navy puke shows up on a Nifty 50 and when his mates ask him why the heck he didn't come on a faster bike he replied "That's cool, cos the Air Force are sending Gunnyrob on his Beemer".

Lay into him folks!!!

/Off Topic (Tri-Service joke - that you're prob very familiar with, but worth repeating).
How to secure a building:
Navy consult internally for a week, then send in a dozen pers, with a coupla sturdy ones manning the door.
Air spend a month drawing up a contract for outsourcing.
Army clear the building, lock the doors and blow the fecker up. Job done....'secured'.

/On Topic.

BTW, it sounds like you're fucked :Pokey:, but ups to the guys that helped ya out - real mates right there.

[Ixion]

Your splines are fucked. How long since you lubed them with the Special Secret Pixie Spline Lube? More than 30000k ? If you're real lucky its just stripped the splines out of the clutch centre. Maybe a $2000 job if you get it done by a BMW dealership ($300 if you do it yourself). If you're unlucky, the gearbox input shaft is toast. Sell the house and y' wife and daughters.

60 years BMW have been making bikes with dry plate clutches, and they STILL haven't got the splines sorted. Every car on the road nowdays has a single plate dry clutch with splines (No I don't want to know about your Austin 16/6) . Not one of them EVER needs its splines lubed with Secret Pixie Spline Lube every year. Mr Motu, are you listening?

[merv]

Well my faith in the legendary reliability of BMWs took a massive hit yesterday!!!


Oh OK, I'd never heard of that legend before, not even with their cars.

Hitler was right surely LoL!!

[Swoop]

Have you not paid any attention to the fifty million repost's of Hitler's "the wrong bike"?
"A fucking BMW" "I might as well walk"...
Hitler knew what he was on about, perhaps...:whistle:

:rofl:

Good on the rescue crew! Top work to all involved.

[MaxB]

The reliability myth of BMWs comes from the airheads. BMW have been quick to trade off that in selling the modern stuff. It may be interesting to note that in the 70s the big Beemers cost nearly double the price of an equivalent Jap bike. Today that gap has closed so that most of the range is in the $20-30k bracket right alongside the equivalent Jappas.

They will still do huge kays but they have to be looked after and if they are left alone like a Jap bike they will break. I know 2 riders overseas who have over 250000 miles on their Beemers (an R65 and a K100RS) and they still look like new. But they are 'hands on' guys and are prepared to fix things as they need to.

Sometimes I wonder what kind of rider BMW have in mind to buy their new bikes.

[gijoe1313]

BMW = Bike might work? Jeez sounds like a trial of the ages, good to hear plan B and C and D all worked out! :doh:

I hope the report from the mechanic doesn't go the size of a telephone directory! :sweatdrop

Nice writeup, pity about the bike!

[gunnyrob]

[QUOTE=Ixion;1557127]Your splines are fucked. How long since you lubed them with the Special Secret Pixie Spline Lube? More than 30000k ? If you're real lucky its just stripped the splines out of the clutch centre. Maybe a $2000 job if you get it done by a BMW dealership ($300 if you do it yourself). If you're unlucky, the gearbox input shaft is toast. Sell the house and y' wife and daughters. QUOTE]

well I'm fucked then....

Bike has been maintained as per service guide, so wasn't expecting shite like this. At least I wasn't in deepest darkest ouagadougou being chased by hoop snakes.

[Taz]

What mileage has the 1200 done? My 1100GS is up to 114000k's now with no major issues (so far) But now it's run in that might change.....

[Swoop]

BMW = Bike might work?
Close. Rastafarians like to steal them because they believe BMW stands for Bob Marley and the Wailers...:whistle:

[Forest]

What mileage has the 1200 done? My 1100GS is up to 114000k's now with no major issues (so far) But now it's run in that might change.....

I once hired an 1100GS in Australia for the weekend. It had around 224,000 on the clock.

[oldrider]

Takes a lot of bottle for a BMW owner to write such a frank and readable report like that! :yes:

I hope your repair costs are not excessive.

Great reading about all the goodwill in getting you home too.

I was quite taken with those R 1200 GS's when they came out but I was mostly attracted to their huge tank. (not meant as a piss take)

Your story reminds me of why I went for the Tiger, half the price and twice the reliability! (Well, Tiger riders say that anyway!)

Good thread, posts and story. :ride: Cheers John.

[Bonez]

Rob may I recommend a unloved 20 year old Honda as a replacement M/C ;) With a chain even.

All makes have those bikes that have duff components. Being able to laugh off little dramas like this one is half the fun of motorcycling ah bro?

[Guided_monkey]

Go the German technology.........

So that's you off the road for a wee while.

:scooter:

[Bonez]

I forgot to mention you meet the nicest folk on the Napier-Taihapi road ;).

[Krayy]

One thing we forgot to mention was the shear space inside Frosty's van.

All the way down I had visions of us removing mirrors, the windshield and pack racks to get the monster in (the R1200GS is frickin' HUGE), but it went in no dramas at all.

There was a couple of hairy moments getting 300kg of bike up the portable ramp that was bending like a willow in a storm, but aside from that (and the bike falling over in the van just before the Bombays), happy as.

P.S. I wouldn't fancy gettng the 1200GS Adventure in though, or a Goldwing. :2thumbsup

[MIXONE]

BMW = Bike might work? Jeez sounds like a trial of the ages, good to hear plan B and C and D all worked out! :doh:

I hope the report from the mechanic doesn't go the size of a telephone directory! :sweatdrop

Nice writeup, pity about the bike!

Boxer Many Worries!

[jim.cox]

Boxer Many Worries!

or

Bite My Wallet

[Forest]

A few years ago I dropped a rented 1150GS on one of the gravel hairpins along the Taihape-Napier road.

There was no traffic and I had to pick the bike up by myself.

Let me tell you something I learned that day. The reason BMWs are so expensive is because they're sold by the kilogram.

[gunnyrob]

So, let's put this saga to bed.

After 7 weeks, Max was still at Experience BMW in bits, and the Westpac ride was rapidly approaching. Sebastian was working at it, but had run out of time, so I was introduced to Max’s younger brother, Rolf!

Rolf is an R1200R, a lighter street version of the R1200GS, with the same running gear, but street based suspension and tyres. It was interesting to compare the two bikes, and I noted that it was a lot more work hanging on as there was no fairing. Interestingly, there was a lot less buffeting on Rolf, as my helmet was in clear air and handling was superb.

The Westpac ride went off really well, in spite of the total shite weather. Having good riding gear paid off, and Rolf made things easy by warming my tender, Technician’s hands.

The company on the ride was excellent, and we had a great time going through Tauranga, Rotorua and Hamilton. Being on the naked was a bit tiring though, and I was feeling a bit buggered by the time we got to the rescue centre. Rolf was very easy to ride around town, and I would highly recommend one if this is your thing.

Finally on Tuesday, Sebastian called & said Max was sorted. It had been a major job, with the gearbox output shaft rooted, along with the clutch & pressure plate needing replacement etc, etc, etc.

It had been caused possibly by a waterblaster injecting moisture into the dry clutch, causing it to crap out big time.

So, I guess the damage is like this:

Recovering your bike to Auckland after you shit your clutch on the Gentle Annie-$400 :pinch:

Getting your bike fixed after shitting your entire clutch and everything that is even related to it-$3765.30 :gob:

Getting your bike back after 7 weeks having to drive to Bar Africa on Thursday nights-Priceless! :woohoo:

Thanks again to Krayy for recovering me to Aucks, Frosty for loaning me the Van, and the team at Experience BMW for getting Max back on the road. (Sorry for racking up 800km on Rolf guys!) :rockon:

See you on the ATNR:scooter:

[gunnyrob]

some pix of Max & Rolf

[Swoop]

Getting your bike fixed after shitting your entire clutch and everything that is even related to it-$3765.30
Bugger me! I'm glad I do not have to put up with Bavarian reliability at those prices...:shit:

[Ixion]

It's what they do. is why we luvs them so :love:

[TOTO]

It was cool to see you riding Rolf :niceone:

Maybe max and Rolf can share the same garage at some point ay ;)

[xgnr]

Swap ya? :2thumbsup

[James Deuce]

I could've sold you a perfectly reliable Katana 400 for the price of that job.

Actually youd've had change.

Good to hear you are back on the road though.

[Krayy]

Ahhh...remember that day we were in AMPS ready for you to buy a Honda?

Could have saved yourself 4k right there and then :rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl: