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View Full Version : Humour: His Diary/Her Diary



woodboats
26th May 2008, 17:24
HER DIARY:

Tonight, I thought my husband was acting weird.

We had made plans to meet at a bar to have a drink. I was shopping with
my friends all day long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that I was a
bit late, but he made no comment on it.

Conversation wasn't flowing, so I suggested that we go somewhere quiet
so we could talk. He agreed, but he didn't say much. I asked him what was
wrong; he said, 'Nothing.' I asked him if it was my fault that he was upset.

He said he wasn't upset, that it had nothing to do with me, and not to
worry about it. On the way home, I told him that I loved him. He smiled
slightly, and kept driving. I can't explain his behavior. I don't know why he
didn't say, 'I love you, too.' When we got home, I felt as if I had lost him
completely, as if he wanted nothing to do with me anymore. He just sat
there quietly, and watched TV. He continued to seem distant and absent.

Finally, with silence all around us, I decided to go to bed. About 15
minutes later, he came to bed. To my surprise, he responded to my
caress, and we made love. But I still felt that he was distracted, and his
thoughts were somewhere else. He fell asleep - I cried. I don't know what to do.
I'm almost sure that his thoughts are with someone else. My life is a disaster.


HIS DIARY:

Harley wouldn't start today, but at least I got lucky.

Mikkel
26th May 2008, 17:35
Think of the women - don't buy a Harley.

MVnut
26th May 2008, 20:25
And if he gets lucky every time his Harley doesn't start, he'll be doin pretty bloody well lol:beer:

AllanB
26th May 2008, 20:46
Now look girls. When you ask a guy what he is thinking and he says 'nothing' that's correct - hes just chilling and, well, thinking of 'nothing'

Or bikes - if its bikes and he is over 20 he has learnt to make the answer 'nothing'.

:argue::argue::argue::argue::argue::argue::argue:: argue:

Big Dave
25th August 2010, 21:45
HER DIARY

Tonight, I thought my husband was acting weird.
We had made plans to meet at a bar to have a drink.
I was shopping with my friends all day long, so I
thought he was upset at the fact that I was a bit late,
but he made no comment on it.

Conversation wasn't flowing, so I suggested that we
go somewhere quiet so we could talk. He agreed, but
he didn't say much. I asked him what was wrong.
He said, 'Nothing.' I asked him if it was my fault that
he was upset. He said he wasn't upset, that it had
nothing to do with me, and not to worry about it.

On the way home, I told him that I loved him.
He smiled slightly, and kept driving. I can't explain his
behaviour. I don't know why he didn't say, 'I love you, too.'
When we got home, I felt as if I had lost him completely,
as if he wanted nothing to do with me anymore.
He just sat there quietly, and watched TV. He continued
to seem distant and absent.

Finally, with silence all around us, I decided to go to bed.
About 15 minutes later, he came to bed. To my surprise,
he responded to my caress, and we made love. But I still
felt that he was distracted, and his thoughts were
somewhere else. He fell asleep -I cried. I don't know
what to do. I'm almost sure that his thoughts are with
someone else. My life is a disaster.



HIS DIARY

My motorcycle wouldn't start today, can't figure out why,
but at least I got laid.

SMOKEU
25th August 2010, 21:56
I still can't figure out why females needlessly complicate even the simplest of things.

tri boy
25th August 2010, 22:22
Remembering the correct points gap for the ol girl as you hit the vinergar stroke is one of the greatist feelings a man can have.
They will never understand.

Genie
26th August 2010, 06:56
I still can't figure out why females needlessly complicate even the simplest of things.

I know....you imagine being said female when this stuff starts to happen.....damn insane. My bitches then start fighting about who is right and the sensible one in the corner then has to start yelling. Damn noisey in my head some days!

Bikemad
26th August 2010, 08:33
good one Dave..............needed a laugh this mornin

shafty
26th August 2010, 08:47
Gold.

Reminds me of an old Andy Capp cartoon, with Flo on her hands and knees scrubbing, Andy rolls in from the pub and slots in behind her doggie style...

Flo: "Fuck fuck fuck, thats all you think about"

Andy: "Is there a beer in the fridge?"

tamarillo
26th August 2010, 09:10
I still can't figure out why females needlessly complicate even the simplest of things.

You are not supposed to figure it out or get it! The whole point is the difference and the fun it gives.