What's one of the stupidest things you've done as a kid?

[firefighter]

When I was six, I wanted to make sure mum wasn't lying when she told me that the glass on the fireplace was hot, which resulted in me having no use of my hands for a few weeks....

About the same age I rode down the street (was when kids played on the road with the neighbours) as fast as possible, sitting down, and hit the kerb on purpose hoping without the usual "bunny hop" i'd somehow make it up, flew over the handle bars, landed on my face and grazed up my mouth, nose cheeks, forehead (no helmet) stones sticking out of my arms (lots of road rash) knees torn up......

and everytime I was hurt I was all fixed up by mum, not some A&E clinic......even when I burnt the shit out of my fingers ma. just dealt with it herself.........It wasn't a big deal. I still remember her sending out to play afterwards....back on the road, good on ya mum!

[skidMark]

Jesus.

Where do i start.

Um, whats the character limit for a kb post?:whistle:

[Maha]

Smashed my sisters glasses with my little builders set........
Oh hang on, just read the thread title...when I was a kid?...mmmmm cant remember

[Lias]

Used my mechano plastic crescent to undo the bolts attaching all the posts of my mums pergola to the ground.

Grabbed a hot iron by the base.

Vaccumed the ashes out of the fireplace and burnt out mums vaccuum.

I could go on for hours lol.

[Finn]

1) Thinking that paint, meths & petrol mixed up in a hole in the ground right on the fence line under a dry tree wouldn't be very flammable. Then telling the firemen that I had no idea how it started and that the fence and the tree had burnt down last guy fawkes... while they were still on fire.

2) After being beaten up for delivering junk mail I decided that for health reasons it would be better to bury them under my house... until 12 months later when my parents decided to build a rumpus room. Must have been there when you bought the house was my response. Putting aside the fact they built it from scratch and the newspapers still had dates on them.

3) After my mother and I bumped into my form teacher at the shops and discussed my mothers upcoming 2 week holiday, my form teacher later said that I must be looking forward to MY trip when in fact I wasn't going. Seizing the opportunity, I took 2 weeks off school where a) Item 1 happened, b) I took my mothers car into town and got pulled over by the cops. Not for doing anything particularly stupid apart from being only 13 1/2.

4) Escaping from the bedsit at our holiday house in the middle of the night to reenact the storming of Normandy only to get stuck half way up a cliff. 2 hours of screaming and we we were finally rescued from the Beachlands volunteer fire brigade.

5) After watching American Graffiti, it gave me an idea on how to seek revenge on a grumpy neighbour. One end of the chain to the car, the other to the car port. Goodbye carport and hello slave labour to pay for it.

6) Inspecting Dad's brand new Holden Kingswood and finding out what "this thing does" Not a great idea on a steep driveway.

7) Drinking beer during lunchtime in Form 2.

There's a few more but these are what spring to mind

[fireball]

i have a long list of dumb shit i used to do as a kid most of the time it was cos someone said "i bet you cant do..."

my fondest ones are

me and my lil bro spent summers throwing stones at the bees nest to see what would happen


jumping off the shakey bridge while in drought....

[mister.koz]

Rigged up a jump on the footpath for my bike, decided having a nice fluffy looking tree at the end looked better than road so i came screaming down the drive way, hit the ramp, went through the tree (bike stopped and onto the road knocked out in the path of an on-coming car :)

[enigma51]

Jesus.

Where do i start.

Um, whats the character limit for a kb post?:whistle:

Its easy you where born :Pokey:

[skidMark]

Decided to see if my head could fit between bed bars. dad had to use a scissor jack to get me out.

Build a treehut so big that it eventually killed the tree then the whole lot ie...the whole bloodey tree inc. hut fell on grandmas little holden barina.

Ummmm....

Lit a drain on fire, which then lit the scrub all down walkway on fire....No idea how it went out, lucky for me it did.

Snuck onto the golf course and played a whole round, when asked by a member without thinking i said my member number was 6543.

Ummmm...

drove dads race car around a car park with him on back...stalled and daddy went flying like superman.

ummm...

decided to dig a hole to china through mums vege garden.... then got so deep i was getitng the clay which they had spent shitloads to get rid of so it wasnt in the vege garden...had to be pulled out because i had got at least a metre down

Was on a trip with asian neighbours...chocked on some random asian hard lolly...
So they held me upside down n whacked my back till i coughed it up...that was awesome.

Threw rocks at cars from behind the conifer tree.

ummm

Played WWF wrestling on the neighbours big trampoline with the championship belt slung above which you had to jump off the high fence and grab on the way down to the trampoline. first to it won.

Racing home built wood go karts with neighbour.
wheel came off and bottlecapped down the road.

Her was beating me once because both him and brother were in there one....started drifting down the street and watch them flip it and get trapped inside the surround box and go upside down down the street, how they didnt get nailed i will never know.

ummmmm lol

Getting hit off my bicycle on way to school by a bus.

ummmm

t boneing a car coming out of thier driveway on a bicycle.

ummmm

flipping endless wheelies on my BMX.

ummmm

Punched a kid at school in the face, broke his nose....broke my hand.
(i still won though honest) they made me take a taxi to school after that because it happened on school bus..... taxi driver took me for awesome drift detours and burnouts on way to school in the ford falcon though! LOL

ummm...

hooked one of my now best mates 4 times in the head. (NEVER LET ME FORGET IT)

ummm

Got beat up so came back with a 1 metre long piece of 8x8 retaining wall post...


he ran away when i tried to attack.

Filling up 50 plastic bags with water and laying them on the main road.

umm smoke bombs put in any place you could imagine.

I think thats all for now.:whistle:

[Colapop]

Me and a couple of mates decided to go on an 'adventure' ride (on our bicycles.) We rode down this sealed road to see where it went and then along the dirt road at the end. It ended up next to the railway lines and a rail bridge so that became our base camp. We duly lit out little fire to heat up the cans of beans we'd brought along and thought we were doing pretty good. No can opener so the cans went unopened onto the fire. When someone remembered they could explode there was mass panic! Running around trying to figure out how to get the cans out of the fire (that hadn't occured to us beforehand either) I came up with the idea to let them explode. BUT we'd put a big sign that I found over them so we would be safe!
The cans took quite a while to get to explosion point by which stage wooden sign had started burning. Cans explode, burning sign is showered everywhere, farmers field of maize catches fire, shearers quarters catch fire...

Once the maize started going and we couldn't stop it we took off. Farking packed our undies for ages afterwards thinking the cops were looking for us!!

[Tank]

Was about 16 - out the back of the boondocks with mates.

Pissed and stoned with a 22 rifle.

2 of us surfing on top of the car down gravel roads whilst shooting at opposums - one spotting from the roof, one shooting from the bonnet.

One pissed, stoner driving with no licence - he was 14.

Jesus - makes me wonder how we never died that night.

Other stupid things -

Threw a guy off a balcony once - got arrested.

Woke up next to a really, really, really fat and extremtly ugly chick once - had shaving rash on my face..(WTF).. looked under covers ..... oh shit...stubble..... ran out of house only to find I had no idea what town I was in.

ahh - good times.

[firefighter]

Woke up next to a really, really, really fat and extremtly ugly chick once - had shaving rash on my face..(WTF).. looked under covers ..... oh shit...stubble..... ran out of house only to find I had no idea what town I was in.

ahh - good times.


:sick: :sick: :sick: :sick: :puke: :puke: :rofl:

[nodrog]

running my sister over with the tractor is one of my highlights, lucky mum and dad thought it was an accident!

[Maha]

Woke up next to a really, really, really fat and extremtly ugly chick once - had shaving rash on my face..(WTF).. looked under covers ..... oh shit...stubble..... ran out of house only to find I had no idea what town I was in.
ahh - good times.

Ruawai???.....:eek:

[NighthawkNZ]

What's one of the stupidest things youv'e done as a kid?

grow up...

[Boob Johnson]

I cant say because no one has ever been charged to date :innocent:

[ManDownUnder]

Dad painting window, painting plank leaning against the house. Us kids saw the thing as a slide - not as the source of many splinters

... I'm lucky I still have balls...

[007XX]

Set fire to the neighbour's overgrown garden cos I was building a camp fire...I was 5, but I still remember the hiding my dad gave me.


At 9, I faked my dad's signature on my school reports for 6 months...that teacher was an ugly cross eyed toadstool but she finally caught on to the play. Needless to say, the hiding was once again painful!

One of the french disciplinary tool in the old days was a mini whip made of a short wooden handle with thin laniards of leather hanging off it. I can't recall exactly what I did, but anyway, I thought it'd be real clever to cut the laniards so Dad couldn't use that evil thing to express his dissatisfaction... well, blimey...he just used the handle eh!

Almost set fire to the whole building, aged 6 or so, after playing with the matches again, this time blackening the underside of some stairs. I learnt that day that ye, wood burns well!

Age 4, my mum took me to visit a GF of hers, and while they chatted, I was given the opportunity to look at some of the ladies pretty exotic fish in the tank. Mum gasped when she saw my pants really wet, and asked if I'd had an accident. The only accident was me wanting to take the pretty fishies home with us, and put them in my pockets...


I think that Sue Bradford would have thought my dad the Antechrist...but hell, I deserved every hidings I got! :laugh:

[skidMark]

Age 4, my mum took me to visit a GF of hers, and while they chatted, I was given the opportunity to look at some of the ladies pretty exotic fish in the tank. Mum gasped when she saw my pants really wet, and asked if I'd had an accident. The only accident was me wanting to take the pretty fishies home with us, and put them in my pockets...





So thats why that part of a lady smells like fishys!!!! :eek5:

[007XX]

So thats why that part of a lady smells like fishys!!!! :eek5:

Thanks for the vote of confidence, but I would have hardly called myself a lady at age 4...

*even now, I don't really fit that description*

[mowgli]

What's one of the stupidest things youv'e done as a kid?
When I was about six or seven I somehow obtained an empty shotgun shell. I particularly liked the brass base and proceded to cut away the plastic casing. I wanted the rest of the plastic out but couldn't cut it out. In my wisdom I decided to throw it in the open fire and planned to retrieve it later when the ashes cooled. Little did I know that the empty shell had a live cap in it. My folks nearly shit themselves.
Thankfully the fire guard caught the shower of embers and the house didn't burn down :doh:

[skidMark]

Thanks for the vote of confidence, but I would have hardly called myself a lady at age 4...

*even now, I don't really fit that description*


Ive got no reply.

LOL

:sweatdrop

[skidMark]

When I was about six or seven I somehow obtained an empty shotgun shell. I particularly liked the brass base and proceded to cut away the plastic casing. I wanted the rest of the plastic out but couldn't cut it out. In my wisdom I decided to throw it in the open fire and planned to retrieve it later when the ashes cooled. Little did I know that the empty shell had a live cap in it. My folks nearly shit themselves.
Thankfully the fire guard caught the shower of embers and the house didn't burn down :doh:


Some mothers do have 'em lol :headbang:

[Mikkel]

From before alcohol became the primary ingredient in the stupidity of my life:

When I was around 5 we were visiting my uncle and he'd just bought a brand new forklift. I was looking forward to seeing it. Patience has never been my strongest point, so I went out and started it up and then went in to ask him if he was coming along. He just about shit his pants - I didn't get it back then... but imagine the potential consequences had it not been in neutral.

There have been many, very big, fires. Sometimes spiked with spray cans and other exploding goodies. Once we even decided it would be cool to melt lead and cast small figurines... One of the guys' father was a mechanic and we got hold of a shitload of wheel balancing weights. Needless to say, our mothers thought it was a rather bad idea.

Insisting to my father that I knew how to drive a car - I didn't...

A mate and I once tried to make our own copy of Venice in my parents' veggie garden. A very muddy affair indeed!

There are plenty more, but most of them eludes me right now. How we survive childhood is a true wonder.

[martybabe]

Hmm, stole the groundsmans white paint sports field marker trolley thing and drew a huge naked lady on the rugby pitch at school, in the dark.

From the second floor the next day you could see two giant lopsided boobies and what looked like a road map of spaghetti junction. :clap: The Teacher said the nipples were very good as the cane bounced off my arse once more. :nono:

Found my Dad's retactable metal measuring tape and took it to school, as I'm playing with it after school the old man turns up to take me home (never picked me up before or since) and the bastard tape wont retract. My old man was a tyrant and he would have killed me if he caught me with sommat of his, so I shoved 2 or 3 metres of this unretracted metal razor tape down my undies and got in the motor.

I sat down, NOW the fuggin thing retracts!!!!, whir snap twang, ow ow fuggin ow. Dad looks at my mechanical sounding crotch, looks at me, smacks me round the head and drives me home so mom could stick a plaster on me willy.

Ah yes a farking good day, all in all. :laugh::rofl:

[nighthawk]

I have often wondered how I survived my childhood, I grew up on the fringes of town and spent many happy days wandering the local hills and farms etc.
When I was about ten my brother and I spent a week at a mates place, his father had a huge workshop which we kids got full use of, much to his dismay after we turned a Leaf spring and several fence posts and a wire strainer into a very powerful catipult.:dodge:
We could throw anything up to about 2kgs a hell of a distance, golf balls went best and I sure people half a km away would like to have caught up with us.
Another school holidays we found a two foot square mirror and used it to throw a reflection onto the hill opposite town, the local copper got most pissed with us when he finnally caught up with us, he had been receiving calls for days about UFO's etc from all the old ladies around town.:nono:

[Colapop]

Thankfully alcohol came along and has removed most of the memories of my stupidity....

[icekiwi]

6 yr old putting finger into bedside lamp socket....
It was the bulb blown...it didn't run out of electricity!!..

[Oakie]

Aged about 8 I guess ... the second, third and fourth time I put my finger into the same light socket and thought, 'What the hell was that!?' as my arm seemed to vibrate like a ... a ... a vibrating thing each time.

[slofox]

-Trying to pull the plug on the vacuum cleaner when my older brother was using it. Had been told "never touch the plugs" so I used a large (metal) key to lever the plug out with...got it down the back of the plug, shorted out the phase and neutral pins, blew the key to bits, blew the fuses, ran away - blamed my little (baby) sister...never ever did let on it was me.......

-opening the taranaki gate on a field full of cows and then pissing off quick...cows everywhere within minutes and "no I didn't see anybody...."

-jumping off the roof onto the lawn because older brother dared me to...no wonder my knees are fucked nowadays......

-lighting a match inside - held it under the armchair so "nobody would see". Set fire to the hessian underneath the chair and just took off - musta gone out on its own cause the house didn't burn down....

-digging a large hole in the veg garden, covering it with sticks, then paper, then soil on top to totally disguise it...caught the old man a few days later when he stepped into it....fortunately was out the day we caught him...hehehe

-lighting a cracker, putting it on the open window sill when mother was inside the room. It went bang but she went banger...got the shit beaten outa me for that one - she had a very short fuse my mum.....shorter than the cracker anyway.....

-crackers again - lighting a thunderflash, dropping it into a glass jar, screwing on the lid and running like hell.....talk about anti-personel weapons...glass for bloody miles around. Spent next two hours with yard broom......

-watching older brother and his mate wedging a large log into the local railway lines to "see if we could derail a train....."!!!! Guess it didn't work cause there were no reports of derailed trains in the news.....sheesh...KIDS!!!

[Pedrostt500]

thought I would burn the rubbish in the rubbish pit used petrol to start the fire, needed matches so went back to house to get some, struck match, and threw it into the pit, a sheet of flame came out of the pit and removed my eyebrows and fringe.
ran over my brother while learning to drive a tractor.
ran over mums grape vines while learning to ride a motorbike.
Wrote F*U*C*K on the lid of my school desk and didnt know what it meant, got the strap for that.
crashed my push bike into a steel pipe gate broke my nose 3 days in hospital.
stuck my finger in a live light socket to see what would happen.

[Donor]

Made a batch of cookies from that pre-made cookie dough.

My father scoffed half a dozen.

Didn't have the balls to tell him they were 'herbal' cookies... he slept 6 hours in a lazy boy chair...

[skidMark]

Made a batch of cookies from that pre-made cookie dough.

My father scoffed half a dozen.

Didn't have the balls to tell him they were 'herbal' cookies... he slept 6 hours in a lazy boy chair...

Bwahaahahahahahhahaha

Nicely done!:laugh:

[Iggy]

When I 7 was pissed off with wearing my hearing aids cos they were so ancient like plug in your ear and a long cord strapped to your aid in your top pocket so I burried the bloody thing in the sandpit.:whistle:

Watched a mate climb a tree up to birds nest to put a cracker in a chicks hungry mouth....boooooommmm!!!! mean bastard he was.:argh:

A guy at primary school who happened to be the deputy headmasters son was giving me arseholes like name calling, the stares etc so was walking home one day and he was riding his bike on the footpath towards me so saw him coming and in a flash pushed him square in the lamp post:Oops:

[rainman]

Where I grew up I could get the ingredients for gunpowder at an early age, OTC, and firecrackers were real firecrackers, so... blowing shit up.

I often went to blow shit up at a quarry near a mates place, where the guards didn't like other people blowing shit up (union shop, I think), and so would chase us. They had guns and got tense. We had to climb a serious cliff to escape. It was fun.

Mate and I constructed an explosive-packed projectile launching cannon and blew out a slat in one of those concrete precast walls from 30 metres. And nearly the one at the other side of the neighbours yard as well. The person in the garden inbetween was not very impressed.

I was also armed with an air rifle, so shot lots of inappropriate things too. Some were uncomfortably close to people. This was generally not well received. (This gun carrying was legal and quite common, I must have been 10 or 12).

More than once I covered the entire block in dense smoke. And I went through a stage of electrocuting things, I think.

(Actually, this sounds a lot like stupid things other people did - giving me explosives and weapons? What's with that?)

But when I became a teenager and discovered alcohol my scientific bent ceased and I spent my time getting pissed and driving my mates parents car around the yard, trying to run over another mate on his motorbike. Or hanging off the roof while others did the same, or being the rider in the scenario above. Or other equivalently moronic things.

And now I have two sons. Karma is a bitch!..... :buggerd:

[CookMySock]

when I was a teenager I bought a KG of gelignite from farmers' trading, and made bombs. Yes, real ones ! We blew up cars and shit. Fucking lucky we never blew up people as well. No darwin awards fortunately, but we got close.


DB

[Shaun]

STOLE A V6 Capri when I was 9, and got it stuck on the beach in PATEA in the sand, and the tide came in a did a bit of damage- BIG WOOPS!


PS_ THE OWNER WAS A BANK MANAGER_ So NO PROBLEM


YES THE POLICE SPOKE TO ME

[fire eyes]

:Punk: geeee so many to choose from! Playing tag blind folded and running into a free-standing BBQ that was actually BBQ-ing at the time. I knowwwwwww ... dumb eh lol. Still have the burn scars on my knee!

[Oakie]

Well seeing some have mentioned teenage years .... having a party while mum was away and thinking she wouldn't know. She didn't mind because the house was tidier when she got home on Sunday night than it had been when she left on Friday ... which incidentally was how she figured out I'd had a party. Can't win huh!

[Drew]

Many many different things, yet the common factor was always Jimmy saying, "I've got a great idea, why dont we..." it'd always be me that went first.

[skidMark]

Many many different things, yet the common factor was always Jimmy saying, "I've got a great idea, why dont we..." it'd always be me that went first.



"A friend will bail you out of jail"

" A TRUE friend will be next to you going, fuck that was fun":eek:

[slofox]

1) Thinking that paint, meths & petrol mixed up in a hole in the ground right on the fence line under a dry tree wouldn't be very flammable. Then telling the firemen that I had no idea how it started and that the fence and the tree had burnt down last guy fawkes... while they were still on fire.

I have been laughing about this one for the last 24 hours - such dumb lies we tell when so young - reminds me of some of my own totally implausible lies.

GREAT thread this one!!:killingme

[EJK]

grow up...

It's inevitable... :bye:

[98tls]

When 7 years old myself and another put a railway sleeper across the railway line:oi-grr:what a noise when the Northerner hit it:wacko:Not to clever at all and as we lived in the only house for many miles it was pretty obvious.We ran home,my stepmother said "whats wrong" we replied "nuthin"five minutes later a knock on the door from the train driver:wacko:Got our arses burnt later when the old man got home.

[Dave Lobster]

It's inevitable... :bye:

No it's not. Growing old is inevitable. Growing up is optional.. :)

[Winston001]

Jesus.



Um, whats the character limit for a kb post?:whistle:

Played with black powder until blew a glass bottle up in my face. Live and learn. :shit:

[kevfromcoro]

6 yr old putting finger into bedside lamp socket....
It was the bulb blown...it didn't run out of electricity!!..

I done that..hid under the bed when i done it..true.is doesnt run out of power..also rode a pushbike down the road and asked my mate to jam a broom handle in it..not the the front wheel shouts me..too late..
jumped off a roof onto a trampoline.fuck i went high up.....mate was on the roof and i passed him....still can see the look on his face.....

[Daffyd]

Tried to use a .22 cartridge as a whistle, like my big brother...ended up swallowing it. Mum fed me lots of castor oil until it passed!

[EJK]

As a young curious Asian, I once did an experiment combining an electric plug (female) and a pair of steel chopstics. Did two more to realise that it was dangerous.

[alanzs]

The list could be quite long, but one of the more memorable ones was when a I dared a (stupid) friend to put a bullet in a vise and then hit the end of the bullet with a hammer. He did it. Shot a whole clean through the garage.
A few years later he burnt down his garage with the family car in it.

There is a school of Darwinian thought that shows a direct correlation between stupid acts that kids do being more frequent and the introduction of childproof caps on dangerous items. It used to be, before childproof caps, stupid kids opened the medicine bottle, or bottle of drain cleaner, ingested it and died, therefore stopping that genetics from being passed on. Now, they reproduce. :doh:

[FLYMO]

drinking homebrew and waking up with my mates sister
bloody hairy she was too

[Drew]

Oh the memories are flooding back, I remember so much pain. Finding a .22 bullet, had no gun, "lets hit it with a hammer" says Jimmy, "you do the hammering." My ears rung for a week.

Found a shot gun shell, still had no gun (never could figure out why dad didn't give us a gun, given how mature we were), "lets take out the stuff that goes bang and set it on fire", says Jimmy, "here's a lighter and some paper for a fuse". Thank fuck that stuff has to be under pressure to explode!

So yeah, the stupidest thing I did as a kid...Listened to Jimmy.

[98tls]

Just remembered another,pouring 4 4 litre containers of petrol down a wasp nest and then throwing a match at it.:nono:

[awayatc]

when my son was 3 or 4 he looked like he had been fighting with the cat....
he had seen me shave and copied it....(twin blade disposables)

He also pinched a packet of tobaco and tried to roll one half succesfully and light it up UNDER OUR BED.......
Luckily the house didn't burn down.....

A neighbour brought him back once, little Backpack and all....he was a fair bit down the road "running away"..... near dark

He has been seen jumping out of a tree with a big tarpolin "as a parachute"
Canterbury wind made that more like a hang glider though.......

Just ro name a few that come to mind......

[1 Free Man]

When I was about six or seven I somehow obtained an empty shotgun shell. I particularly liked the brass base and proceded to cut away the plastic casing. I wanted the rest of the plastic out but couldn't cut it out. In my wisdom I decided to throw it in the open fire and planned to retrieve it later when the ashes cooled. Little did I know that the empty shell had a live cap in it. My folks nearly shit themselves.
Thankfully the fire guard caught the shower of embers and the house didn't burn down :doh:
:doh: Yeah amunition was about the silliest toy I ever played with. At about 10 years old me and my mates found some 22 rounds in an old shed and took them home to my place. We decided to get the powder out of them to make a big pile of it and set it alight. We couldn't get the head off the bullets so we ended up putting them in Dad's vice one by one and ripping the heads out of them with a pair of pliers. We had done about 6 of them and Dad came into his workshop to see what we were all up to. He went as white as a sheet when he saw what we were doing. You see the cartriges where rimfire type and of course winding them up in the vice could have been enought to set them off. Dad blew up and my mate scattered like a bunch of pussies. I GOT FUCKING HAMMERED!!! Lesson learned. If you are going to do stupid things with amunition don't take it home to do it. Dad being a WW2 vet had a good apreciation for the does and don't of handling amunition, so did I when he had finished with me. LOL:Oops:

[Bloody Mad Woman (BMW)]

Fantastic thread - have tears rollin down my face with laughter.

4 yrs old - rolled my own cig - in parents bedroom lit match - and to this day I know I blew the match out ha - threw it under the bed - Dad was a seaman and had some of his luggage under there - bedroom annihilated - I had burnt fringe and cardy trying to blow it out - mum was 5 months pregnant =- dad was at sea thank god.

9 years old - gfriend and I decided to have a bbq in height of a nelson summer - on a very dry hill next to where the bikies lived - hill side caught alight - friend and I ran to her house and hid under the bed for an hour - they thought the bikies had done it phew.

Later in life nearly burn't my sister's house down.

3 yrs of age - racing on my tricycle down a very steep shared driveway - how did mum survive????

10 yrs - told not to race down driveway on pushbike - was running late and I had perfected the art of the getting around the gravel corner at the bottom - not this particular morning - landed nose first = broke it - went home and mum promptly said to me I told you so now get off to school.

[Drew]

Jimmy, "We can use this as a ramp, you'll clear it easy."

Me, "OK then."




I'm off to see my therapist now.:bye:

[Trudes]

I remember waiting in the car for mum one day and playing with the cigarette lighter and pulled it out, looked at the orange glow and wondered how hot it was... by putting it on my tongue.
Watched a mate ride off our porch on his bike, must have been a good two meters from the ground, and he always did it with such style and landed nicely every time. I decided to try it one day when there was nobody around... and went flipping off and landed face first into the lawn with bike on top of me and was winded for about 5 minutes.
Cleaned up my brother's room and chucked everything in the bin that would then go out to be burnt in the "pit". My dad came booting into the house closely followed by the dog the day he lit the fire that week and told me not to go outside as there were bullets going off from the rubbish... that's right, I remember there being cartridges from my brother's room that I chucked in the bin...oops!
Lit the fire inside one day, chucked what was normally diesel from a milk bottle onto the fire, to be told that it was petrol this time... after it had blown up in my face and burnt all my eyelashes, eyebrows and fringe off, oh well, I needed a haircut.

[Nagash]

Err.. used to do quite alot of tinkering, still do.

Once had a 1 farrad capacitor, massive thing. Got about 12 or so 9 volt batteries and wired them altogether, got my mate to stick out his tongue. That was nasty.. black tongue for weeks.

Got one of the really old keys, had a fairly big hole in it. Shoved a ball bearing down the hole and some gun powder from a firework and heated up one end of the key with a lighter. The ball bearing fired out of the key and smashed a window. That one was awsome..

When I was real young I took a big handful of my Grandma's anti-depressants. Young and suicidal i was.

Pushed some dick in my primary off a 4 metre diving board.. never knew water could break your ribs till then.

Just last december I road a push bike that was tied to the back of a car, broke my wrist, stitches in my head, plenty of scars all over my right side.

Great thread!

[Nasty]

This is a rather memory laden thread .. oh well mine ...

My big sister told me that it was ok to sleep with gum in my mouth ... I was young (7ish) and believed her .... no longer cos the next day I went from butt long hair to short arse bowl cut .... and don't remember trusting her again.

[Sanx]

Best thread in a very long time...

Aged 2 or so, folded up some aluminium foil, and pushed a 240V plug through it into a socket. Then turned the socket on. Very large bang, blew the ring main fuse, welded the plug to the socket and created a big black stain on the wall.

Aged 7 or so, persuaded my 2 year-old sister that a lump of green Palmolive soap on a lolly stick was actually mint ice-cream. She took a big bite and was promptly sick.

Aged 8 or so, heard somewhere that you could make explosive out of sodium chlorate (weedkiller) and sugar. Not having the internet in those days, tried it and used petrol as a binder. Took the mixture to a local patch of waste ground and set it off. Took five fire trucks to put out the resulting blaze. Me and the friend responsible were hiding...

Aged 10, built a six foot tall snowman in the middle of a snow covered road. Just around a bend. Downhill. Dad found out when someone tried to avoid it and slid into his brand-new BMW.

Aged 11, dropped a large lump of sodium down the drain of the sink in the chemistry lab. BANG! Nowhere near as bad as the shit the chemistry teacher got up to, though.

Aged 18, me and a mate persuaded the physics teacher to find out what happens when you reverse polarise a big electrolytic capacitor. We, of course, knew. And she should have known when we put an asbestos mat down on the bench. Wired up six 20V 6A power supplies in series, connected them to the capacitor and retreated to the back of the room. The metal can of the capacitor buried itself in the ceiling when it blew...

Ahhh - happy days.

[pete376403]

used to put .22 longs in the bench vice with bullet pointing down. Hop up on the bench and hit the end with a hammer. I was pretty sure that they wouldn't ricochet off the concrete floor and go through the bench top (2 inch thick wood) Never did find any of the bullets.

Another trick at school was to remove the light bulbs in the girls toilet blocks and put a two cent piece in the socket, then put the bulbs back in.

I heard of another case where some kids put the power supply selector switches on a whole classrooms computers to 115v.
That wasn't funny, just plain destructive vandalism.

[Trudes]

Another trick at school was to remove the light bulbs in the girls toilet blocks and put a two cent piece in the socket, then put the bulbs back in.


What did that do?

[Qkchk]

Always fix a slipping chain on a pushbike, or:

- You fall off your bike and slide 50M down the road
- Have to pick the gravel out of your gravel rash with tweezers
- Look forward to when the bottle of iodine comes out.


Always check to see if the flames are out in a dish of Meths, or:

- While applying more Meths to the dish the flames get sucked back into the bottle
- The reaction of flame + meths = Flamethrower
- Dont panic otherwise you shoot flames into the garage and even your motorcycle (little CBX250) catches on fire!


Becareful while moving fishing rods, or:

- Someone wanting to help, moves the rods while you are holding them
- Having to remove one big ass hook out of ones finger with pliers.


Never play with something you are not yet experienced with,

- Sit on an old XR250, start it up put it into gear and play with the clutch
- Bike slips out from underneth
- Instead of letting the handlebars go, I slip and pull the throttle on more
- Bike does the big wheely then comes down on top of me
- Knee gets jammed in the back wheel up to the swingarm, luckly the bike stalled.


And the usual 'unexpectedly touching the prongs of a power plug while inserting into the wall.'

[alanzs]

I was supposed to go and play with my 13 year old cousin one day. He couldn't wait for me and took off to make a bunson burner out of a pipe and paint thinner. He lit it and it blew up covering him in burning fuel, igniting his clothes. He died three agonizing days later. :shit:

[Street Gerbil]

My big mistake was not taking my 9 year old nephew seriously after some extensive martial arts training and asking him to "show me something". The hardest thing while lying on the floor was preserving some remaining shreds of dignity and pretending that it didn't hurt at all and I was just playing along. Ouch.

[pete376403]

What did that do?
Made a pretty loud bang when the switch was turned on...

[DarkLord]

Far out....

I remember attacking a wasp nest with my 2 mates, and ended up being the only one that got stung.

One of the best/dumbest/funniest stories I have involves fireworks, does anyone remember those fireworks called Thunder in the Blue Sky? They fired a little tube way up into the air and just exploded.

Me and my genius mate reckoned that since the little tube flew into the air and exploded, if we took the tube out and stuck a wick and a stick on to it, it would work the same as a skyrocket.

It never occurred to us that the tube didn't fly by itself and was launched by something else in the firework. So, we took the tube out, stuck a wick and a stick on it and sure enough it just sat there on the ground and exploded. It was REALLY LOUD. I couldn't hear anything for at least 5 seconds afterwards.

I also managed to crash a nifty 50 into an electric fence...still got no idea how it happened I just remember flying off the bike, hitting all 3 hot wires then flying back off the fence and landing in the middle of the road, stumbling around for at least 10 minutes afterwards wondering what the hell happened.

I've fallen out of trees many times, cracked my head open a few times (and have the scars to prove it), nearly got a criminal record for doing prank calls, flooded the bathroom on at least one occasion, and the list goes on.....

[TOTO]

put kerosine in the toilet everyone smoked = loud BANG and closed school for the day - age 16


a whole class of 30 ate garlic before class = teacher dismissed class - age 15


was stealing cheries on a number of ocasions = was shot with salt on numerous ocasions in my ass (didnt stop us tho) - age 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16


playing at a building destined for demolution, to find out that wen we came back from lunch there was nowhere to play - age 7


riding rollerblades holding onto a bus = road rash for 2 months - age 12



being hit with a falling frozen fish from the 7th floor - age 10


diving head first into water 1 meter deep with razor sharp rocks underneath it on mission bay - age 17


Getting a cat drunk - age 12



Jumping off the 5th floor into the snow 3 stories below - was digging for an hour get out - age 11


filling my neighbours exhaust with stones (hated the fucker) - age 9


painting the dog green with spray paint - age 6



faling englis in 6th grade

[Mikkel]

3 yrs of age - racing on my tricycle down a very steep shared driveway - how did mum survive????

Pfftt, when I was 3 I raced my tricycle down the staircase! :cool:


Aged 8 or so, heard somewhere that you could make explosive out of sodium chlorate (weedkiller) and sugar. Not having the internet in those days, tried it and used petrol as a binder. Took the mixture to a local patch of waste ground and set it off. Took five fire trucks to put out the resulting blaze. Me and the friend responsible were hiding...

A little bit of knowledge is indeed a dangerous thing :yes:

[NOMIS]

sand papered my dads group a vl commodore with something like 80 grit sand paper. :-) all down the drivers side I was about 4 years old.

lost mums wedding ring thought it was a pretty cool toy,

bent the frame of my bike around my body when i crashed through a fence.

broke my leg in 6 places while playing on a washing line get swung around.

broke my rib when i was 6 falling out of a tree.

took dads vs v8 for a spin down the st when i was 13 and got caught... = run = got away. ( not very smart )

[NOMIS]

put kerosine in the toilet everyone smoked = loud BANG and closed school for the day - age 16


a
filling my neighbours exhaust with stones (hated the fucker) - age 9



Did both of these except i used dirt and sticks and sicaders ( spelling ? you no thoes lil bugs that leaver there shells ) and it was engine oil ( dont ask why what did i no )

[Mr Merde]

Growing up in Waiouru as an army brat.

One day my friend Mark and I got into trouble for some petty shit and we took off.

Spotted by grunts going into the grenade range and live firing area.

Military shit themselves over the thought of two 12 year olds playing in that area and called out a search party to get us out safely. This grew until they had a couple of hundred grunts out looking for us.

Unknown to them we had done a big loop and we sitting in the kids playhouse in my back garden.

We didnt go back inside the house till about 10pm.

It was then that the search in the live firing zone was called off.

My arse hurt for a week once my old man got hold of me. Never went back to the grenade range (well not when anyone could see anyway).

[Oakie]

I must have been about 10 when I got my little sister to drink red furniture polish by telling her it was soft drink. Fortunately mum came out when sis' still had the bottle in her hand and saw the red liquid dribbling out of her mouth.

[Hitcher]

One of the immutable laws of physics I learned as a yoof is as follows:

If you drop a live eel in a hot bath with your sister, your sister moves faster than the eel.

[lb99]

Far out....

I remember attacking a wasp nest with my 2 mates, and ended up being the only one that got stung.

One of the best/dumbest/funniest stories I have involves fireworks, does anyone remember those fireworks called Thunder in the Blue Sky? They fired a little tube way up into the air and just exploded.

Me and my genius mate reckoned that since the little tube flew into the air and exploded, if we took the tube out and stuck a wick and a stick on to it, it would work the same as a skyrocket.

It never occurred to us that the tube didn't fly by itself and was launched by something else in the firework. So, we took the tube out, stuck a wick and a stick on it and sure enough it just sat there on the ground and exploded. It was REALLY LOUD. I couldn't hear anything for at least 5 seconds afterwards.

I also managed to crash a nifty 50 into an electric fence...still got no idea how it happened I just remember flying off the bike, hitting all 3 hot wires then flying back off the fence and landing in the middle of the road, stumbling around for at least 10 minutes afterwards wondering what the hell happened.

I've fallen out of trees many times, cracked my head open a few times (and have the scars to prove it), nearly got a criminal record for doing prank calls, flooded the bathroom on at least one occasion, and the list goes on.....

haha
I remember those, jam em upside down in the fussy old neighbours lawn = big hole.

put a whole carton in the stove at some random party, turned it on and then went home. REALLY LOUD BANG, some chick who's parents were away needs a new stove in a hurry.

[svr]

Anyone else thinking `Lots of good ideas here...'?

Anyway, about 1990, driving to town drunk after a vmcc (or manawatu orion) meeting we took on the big roundabout in the industrial part of palmy north - at about 80 kays. We couldnt believe we hadn't crashed so we thought we'd better try it at 90. Still bloody made it! Bit faster we thought. In hindsight 130was way too fast for the ex Billy (kb) corolla (er no ownership papers with that one) but was a piece of piss for parallel parking after that - just let go of the wheel.
Something about being young and racing bikes - you think theres no way you could get hurt in a car like ya nanna drives..
Also burnt my face checking to see if the iron was hot (er that was 2 weeks ago age 39)

[martybabe]

After giving me a spit wash,my mom stood me at the bottom of the stairs and said "stay right there, I'm going upstairs to get changed then we'll go out, now don't move!" :nono:

The nano second she hit the top of the stairs, I was out the back door :D I found this triangular shaped stick and I thought it looked like a batarang so I threw it as hard as I could up into the sky, I was easily distracted as a child, ok still am, and I spotted a little pussy cat next door, I was just thinking what a nice li'll cat when I remembered my stick. :( So I looked up to see what cloud it was stuck in and wham, 6 inch stick slices into my left eye,hits my eye socket and bounces out.

As the blood started to poor I remembered, mom had said, don't move!! so I ran back in the house and stood where I'd been left, with my hand classped over my eye, didn't wanna get in trouble for moving. :lol:

Mom comes to the top of the stairs and I shouted "I didn't move mom!"

mom looks down at her innocent 4 year old boy, just where she'd left him, dressed in a nice sailor suit,............ eye half hanging out, farkin blood gushing out all down me clothes up the wall, on the stairs, like the worst drive by shooting horror zombie movie, crapping myself by now cause she may suspect I had moved. I may have got away with it had I not fainted and hit the banister with my head. :lol:

22 stitches in my eye and a week in hospital and the strange ability to look in two directions at once and I was still insisting my eye had just exploded whilst I was waiting like a good boy. :killingme

Sorry mom. x

[fatboyzed]

Wainuiomata bmx track had a decently high berm on the last corner with a water race behind it. Was dared by a mate to jump the water race. Got a good runup and went for it. No fear, and no brains with a crack in the frame just behind the stem = landing rather hard, and my bike in two halves, not to mention the pain that followed. Dad welded a full gusset into the frame after that with 3mm plate, the bike was dam heavy after that.

[skidMark]

Oooo ooo ooo....

Going down the driveway in my wooden go kart (no motor)

going rather quick as our driveway is downhill, turned really sharp and drifted. Oh crap (i'm about 12 at this point) i think i turned more or something i dunno, all i know is next thing i'm doing 20kph down the driveway backwards.

BANG

Mums Daihatsu Applause inherited a big dent in the drivers side rear door that day.

8 years later it became my car, dent was a reminder everytime i hopped in.

:blank:

[Krayy]

Amateurs, the lot of ya... ;)

(Names and locations changed to protect my ass)

My career as a smoker lasted for almost a whole month when I was around 11. We used to go into hiding to practice our art, and so that our mums wouldn't see us and one of the more favoured places to go for a fag (no, not THAT kind of fag) was in the flood drain tunnels in ****** that ran from ******** Park out towards ****** Rd (great place to go cycling, eeling and many other childhood activities).

So there we were sitting down for a smoke by the road tunnel next to ******* Park. The layout here is that there was a triangular area of grass and Eucalyptus trees flanked by ****** Rd on one side, the flood drain on another and the driveway to a Vehicle Testing Station on the other. There was also a Shell station at the corner of ****** Rd and the driveway.

Now my "mate" (c**t more like) decides it would be a good idea to see if the dry grass on the bank would light, so he does and it does, then he stamps it out and we all have a giggle. Then I have a turn and we stamp it out and have a giggle. Third times the charm then, and I honestly can't recall who lit it the third time, but f**k me if the grass doesn't go up like touch paper and it's all on. :eek5:

As we were on a bank, the fire raced up the slope and into the wooded area. The Eucalyptus trees were full of oil and took off like Roman Candles, but luckily none exploded. Fire engines blared, fires blazed, the Shell station was evacuated in case of explosion and we were shitting ourselves in the highest order (crying too - hey, we were only 11) :crybaby:

Thank god the firemen were on the ball, as from what I recall only 1 or 2 cars got any heat damage and they got it before it jumped the driveway and set the garage, a wheel & tyre shop and the VTNZ ablaze :sweatdrop

So we were off to one side, trying to keep away from the gaze of the firemen who were looking for a cause and then a schoolmate of ours came up and said he saw what we did and that he would tell if we didn't ply him with lunch monies etc for the next year or so. Needless to say, we had to bash him, and that was that. With no other witnesses, there was only our guilty consciences to remind us of that day that could have turned out a lot worse.

At least I never smoked again :whistle:

[ynot slow]

As a 11 or 12yr old,was next door with neighbour and my brother,we were smashing an old box with hammers,I took an almighty back swing to hit the box,on the downward stroke the hammer stopped for a nao second as the claws embedded into my scull,thereby putting a gash which required several stitches.My brother and neighbour thought it seemed funny along with me till I saw my hand had a red substance which resembled blood,ran back to the neighbours home to freak her out,as mum was at work the neighbour took me to the quack,she thought it was an ideal excuse to flog the shit out of their GT Falcon,looking back that was the most fun,the ride.

Move on a few years later when in 20's,NZ stockcar teams champs in Palmy,drinking up after Fridays meeting basking in the knowledge that the scrappers had qualified,a few beers later with other like minded people from Hamilton and Wellington at the motel,we decided to go up town for a burger,on the way back with an urgent need to remove excess DB from bladder,I found a nice quiet alcove to releave the pressure,had only finished when bugger me the door opened beside me and a cop walks out,didn't think it was the cop shop,thought I was smart as was unseen from the street and cars passing,lucky though cop was good humoured.

[Kornholio]

The day I discovered petrol and matches was the day the old mans hair started turning grey and falling out....

So many stories but the one i remember most was my cousin from South Island was staying with us and always trying to outdo the southerners showed him how to make a flamethrower out of a mastitis syringe(a good 50ml) filled with petrol...squeeze a little out, set fire to end and let rip... would have been awesome in the trenches as a close combat weapon....sprayed in a big arc of flaming awesomeness and hosed down the side of the (full) haybarn... She'll be right it wont go through corrugated iron :whistle: It didnt but went through where the sheets overlapped about a 1/3 of way into haybarn :crazy:

Old man was milking and spotted me furiously grabbing buckets of water and trying to extinguish blaze... When he saw the smoke and shit i have never seen hay bales get thrown out of barn as fast as that day.... Burned around 50 out of 2000 so no big deal... Hid down the back of farm til 10pm that night and slinked back home to take the beating as I was hungry and cold and something was making a strange noise in the bush next to where I was hiding..............

Cousin thought I was awesome so it all worked out :woohoo:

[lb99]

The day I discovered petrol and matches was ....

:


f**k me if the grass doesn't go up like touch paper and it's all on.......
:


The reaction of flame + meths = Flamethrower



covering him in burning fuel......:


... it just sat there on the ground and exploded. ...


put kerosine in the toilet ...


Played with black powder ...


...petrol down a wasp nest and then throwing a match at it.:nono:


Luckily the house didn't burn down.....

......


...burnt fringe and cardy ...... hill side caught alight........nearly burn't my sister's house down.

.


... used petrol to start the fire....a sheet of flame


... blowing shit up......explosive-packed projectile launching cannon ......I covered the entire block in dense smoke. .....:buggerd:


.... KG of gelignite from farmers' trading, and made bombs....


Set fire to the neighbour's overgrown garden .........Almost set fire to the whole building..........


....throw it in the open fire .....fire guard caught the shower of embers and the house didn't burn down :doh:


......There have been many, very big, fires. .....spiked with spray cans and other exploding goodies. .......


-.....lighting a match inside .....Set fire to the hessian underneath the chair ...... she had a very short fuse my mum......


..... the glass on the fireplace was hot,!


......Vaccumed the ashes out of the fireplace ......


1) ...paint, meths & petrol .....flammable......firemen ..........volunteer fire brigade.....


.....explode, burning sign is showered everywhere, farmers field of maize catches fire, shearers quarters catch fire...

.....

anyone detect a pattern here?:2thumbsup

[Drew]

anyone detect a pattern here?:2thumbsup

Na, totally different. The flames are always different, so very different, and oddly arousing.

[Kornholio]

Na, totally different. The flames are always different, so very different, and oddly arousing.

True, there is never the same flame twice...extensive testing has proved this :sunny:

[Drew]

True, there is never the same flame twice...extensive testing has proved this :sunny:

I am undecided, I think I should light some more before I say never.

[Mike748]

Awesome thread! Makes me think I that it is inevitable that my son will end up doing these things too.

When I was 7 or 8 I was a short tempered red head and I remember:
a hammer and putting the claws into the back of my head.
a spade and almost chopping my little toe off.
some guy at school and T boneing him into the ditch with my bike.
fights
constantly walking out of school because the teacher annoyed me.

As I got a little older I moved on to:
Petrol, large plastic bags and matches.
Air rifles and putting flamables into the cocked compression chamber to give it more kick, lost accuracy but sounded like a .22 :laugh:
Stripping the radio aerial wire and putting it into the wall socket.

Ummm some other stuff that I best not say.

[awayatc]

Eventhough it wasn't me "Sir", I'd still like to share the following true event with you since it involved matches indeed......

In the late seventies The Dutch send a batalion to Lebanon for UN peacekeeping duties......
The UN headquarters in Nacura where on a hard and rocky soil, BUT What goes in one side has to come out the other end....,
So with a lot of effort longdrops where dug/blasted/ constructed to a considerable depth.
Before the 800 strong battalion rotated ater 6 months service,The substantial amount of shit was disposed of by a slow burning diesel fueled fire.
The new troops where hurriedly instructed about the ins and out of running the base, including the longdrop burnoff........

After another 6 month stint by the next lot, the soldier in charge of this unpleasant little detail lit a match and dropped it into the longdrop.....filled with a few cans of Petrol.......

What took 800 healthy young men 6 months to fill come out faster then you could say SHIT!
Unfortunately what goes up must come down.....prefabs and ragtop landrovers only offering temporary shelter from this major aerial assault....

It is alleged that the word "Diesel" may inadvertedly have been omitted from the handover notes........The new contingent ended up in one off the shittiest camps an army unit ever has been send into.......:confused:

[Skyryder]

I pissed on my dad's tomato plants thinking I was watering them. Those yogi's who drink thier rown piss are slowly killing themselves. The tomatoes died.

Ran away from home and got lost.

I once saw a fire eater so I thought I would try that. Got some benzine from the ol' mans shed. Wiped on the vasaline around the mouth took a 'good swig' of the benzine, lit up and blew, man that was a 'blast.' Some other stuff I'm not even going to mention..................not even after all these years.

Skyryder

[nighthawk]

Ahhhh the smell of cordite.....and really loud bangs:nono:


as I elluded to earlier wa no angel as a kid


One of the better things about growing up before ACC OSH and a lot of other fun kiling agencies was, that for a small amount of money and no note from ya mum, you could go to any chemist shop and buy some of the most interesting chemicals devised to entertain young boys.

We as in all us local kids(now living in what had become a residential street (though you would'nt think it with the odd cow and chook around)had a passion for blowing things up..... nothing was safe and nobody was excluded from the devistation.

A baked bean can pack full of our magic mix in the brand new storm water drain on a sunday afternoon certainly made most of the neighbourhood very aware of our presance.
My mate steve was the primary chemist as he had got hold of a book his father had about alternative weapons from household chemicals,( his father was an officer in the army and was always being called away)well steve put it to good use making so very impressive exsplosives we found that magnisium had an added flash effect when not packed tightly.

A curtail to our time as demolition and pyrotechnic specialists came when steve's cousin found our stash of homemade fun hidden in the wood shed.


This guy was none to bright and was actually out to have a sly ciggy when he found the bag of funny looking fireworks behind a pile of wood........silly bastard lite one and when if started to hiss he dropped it and ran like hell :shit:.........lucky for him as the resulting exsplosion demollished the woodshed took out a lot of windows and we as me, steve and associated siblings spent some weeks (confined to barracks)getting to know more domestic chores.

[1 Free Man]

I pissed on my dad's tomato plants thinking I was watering them. Those yogi's who drink thier rown piss are slowly killing themselves. The tomatoes died.

Ran away from home and got lost.

I once saw a fire eater so I thought I would try that. Got some benzine from the ol' mans shed. Wiped on the vasaline around the mouth took a 'good swig' of the benzine, lit up and blew, man that was a 'blast.' Some other stuff I'm not even going to mention..................not even after all these years.

Skyryder
Come on man don't be shy.
Didn't ya Mum teach you that ya should share with ya friends!!:2thumbsup

[Bren]

My life is full of stoopid things....some more so than others...

'ere goes


Put my arm through the old ladies wringer washing machine...

Thought Dads new Corolla GT needed a new paint job...Primer grey

Released handbrake on steep driveway in abovementioned car....only to wipe out letterbox and door!

rode my bike (with trainer wheels) to a mates place...from Hautu to Turangi...over the Tongararo river bridge on SH1...

Hid at said mates while the old man was searching for me....did I get a beating when the old bugger found me in the end!

Blew up a handfull of shotgun detonators in a Cinder block garage...lost my hearing for ages thru that one....

soaked sisters tampons in petrol...lit, then threw over neighbours fence....took out their shed!

thats enuff for now!

[Niterider]

Hey martybabe, if we could vote, your measuring tape fiasco would probably 've taken the poll! :third: I struggled for quite a while to regain conciousness :eek5:from the :killingme trying to read it to my misses. Definately one of the funniest NZ home blunders.

[Mikkel]

My life is full of stoopid things....some more so than others...

'ere goes


Put my arm through the old ladies wringer washing machine...

Thought Dads new Corolla GT needed a new paint job...Primer grey

Released handbrake on steep driveway in abovementioned car....only to wipe out letterbox and door!

rode my bike (with trainer wheels) to a mates place...from Hautu to Turangi...over the Tongararo river bridge on SH1...

Hid at said mates while the old man was searching for me....did I get a beating when the old bugger found me in the end!

Blew up a handfull of shotgun detonators in a Cinder block garage...lost my hearing for ages thru that one....

soaked sisters tampons in petrol...lit, then threw over neighbours fence....took out their shed!

...

...moving back to the North Island :whistle:

[peasea]

I signed a mate up for the Hudson Cookie Bear club, shoulda signed my own name, duh. Way cool club.

[Number One]

All before I turned 6 - so don't judge me too much :lol:

There used to be this large dry hedge running the length of my street in the Papakura army camp housing, it also happened to run up the sides of the houses too. I was only about 5 at the time but a friend and I decided that we'd make chips. So we fashioned a billy stove (large old coffee can with a fire built under it) and set to work collecting potatoes from his garden. When we returned to our 'kitchen' the hedge was up in flames. Took a good hour to put out and I couldn't sit for a week after dad caught me.

First day of school I received the strap in front my classmates for farting! No really!!! Anyway I got that bitch teacher back by sweeping chalk dust into her gloves...she was away for a wee while with burns (she was allergic). They never figured out who it was...I did the happy 'har har bitch' dance in my head for years...now looking back I realise how terrible that was...still, the testy little girl inside my head laughs when I think about it!

Angela whatserface used to have the longest hair in the school - I was second placed. The little ballerina biarch was soo fricken smug that one day while she sat on the mat in front of me with her arms and legs folded (as you did in little school) I cut her ponytail off with a pair of large scissors...she came to school with a bob the next day :lol: Got the strap then too - but my god it was worth it just to bring that little cow down a peg or two. :devil2:

[martybabe]

All before I turned 6 - so don't judge me too much :lol:

There used to be this large dry hedge running the length of my street in the Papakura army camp housing, it also happened to run up the sides of the houses too. I was only about 5 at the time but a friend and I decided that we'd make chips. So we fashioned a billy stove (large old coffee can with a fire built under it) and set to work collecting potatoes from his garden. When we returned to our 'kitchen' the hedge was up in flames. Took a good hour to put out and I couldn't sit for a week after dad caught me.

First day of school I received the strap in front my classmates for farting! No really!!! Anyway I got that bitch teacher back by sweeping chalk dust into her gloves...she was away for a wee while with burns (she was allergic). They never figured out who it was...I did the happy 'har har bitch' dance in my head for years...now looking back I realise how terrible that was...still, the testy little girl inside my head laughs when I think about it!

Angela whatserface used to have the longest hair in the school - I was second placed. The little ballerina biarch was soo fricken smug that one day while she sat on the mat in front of me with her arms and legs folded (as you did in little school) I cut her ponytail off with a pair of large scissors...she came to school with a bob the next day :lol: Got the strap then too - but my god it was worth it just to bring that little cow down a peg or two. :devil2:

:nono::nono::nono::oi-grr::rofl::rofl:

[Mikkel]

Funny how everybody seems to have been given the strap, a beating or otherwise disciplined for the mischief they've caused.

Either my parents and teachers were different or I have suffered so much abuse I've had to suppress it. Guess I'll never know which one it is.

It does however hint at Kiwiland having an ingrown culture of physically punishing your children - and in that light I begin to understand why people are so upset by the introduction of the anti-smacking bill. Just an observation...

[Number One]

Funny how everybody seems to have been given the strap, a beating or otherwise disciplined for the mischief they've caused.

The teachers at my school were either totally fresh out of training college (they were the soft but nice ones) or the old matrons who were very much like the witches in that Roald Dahl book - they really did seem to hate children!

[Niterider]

Funny how everybody seems to have been given the strap, a beating or otherwise disciplined for the mischief they've caused.

Interesting how you recon it as discipline....


and in that light I begin to understand why people are so upset by the introduction of the anti-smacking bill. Just an observation...

A pity the politicians that wheelbarrowed the A/S bill thru are far less observant than you. They do not want to see the stuffup they made by looking at the little brats getting totally out of hand. The biggest problem with anti-smacking is that children need discipline. Every chilld's experience of proper discipline is love, care and belonging. If not disciplined, they grow up confused and eventually take their own lives as they don't know where they fit in. Watch the suicide figures amongst teens (that grew up in the anti-smacking years) escalate... BTW, this has been proven by dr Neil Whitehouse thru numerous consultations with youngsters on the virge of committing suicide and some failed attempts. But politicians know better:bash: