PDA

View Full Version : Things that haunt me



sinfull
28th July 2008, 17:49
THINGS THAT HAUNT ME!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


If you have sex with a prostitute against her will, is it considered rape or shoplifting?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Can you cry under water?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


How important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Why do you have to "put your two cents in"... but it's only a "penny for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


What disease did cured ham actually have?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like every two hours?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Why do doctors leave the room while you change?
They're going to see you naked anyway.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the T2 lane ?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours?
They're both dogs!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Why did you just try singing the two songs above?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?





--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Number One
28th July 2008, 18:52
:lol: thanks sir I enjoyed that giggle :sunny: sorry all out of love for you...nother time maybe :shutup:

ynot slow
28th July 2008, 21:01
Why do open 24 hr service stations have locks on the doors,and you get no service?

ynot slow
28th July 2008, 21:02
You can prick your finger in public but can't finger your prick in public.:bash:

one fast tl1ooo
18th December 2009, 07:50
If you have sex with a prostitute against her will, is it considered rape or shoplifting?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

How
important does a person have to be before they are considered assassinated instead of just murdered?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Why
do you have to 'put your two cents in'... but it's only a 'penny for your
thoughts'? Where's that extra penny going to?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Once
you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Why
does a round pizza come in a square box?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

What disease did cured ham actually have?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

How
is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Why
is it that people say they 'slept like a baby' when babies wake up like
every two hours?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

If
a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------




Why
are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Why
do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Why
do doctors leave the room while you change?

They're going to see you naked anyway.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Why
is 'bra' singular and 'panties' plural?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Can
a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

If
the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out
of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Why
does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours?

They're both dogs!


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

If
Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

If
corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

If
electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Do
the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Why
did you just try singing the two songs above?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------



Why
do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a
hemorrhoid when it's in your ass?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Did
you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------