Swingers in disguise.

[madbikeboy]

Due to renegade master adding his 2 cents, I thought I'd add this little opener - read this as a giggle not a cry.,


I’m having more of those moments. The ones where you get off the bike and think, “oh shit”. At what point do you hand the keys of your litre sports bike to someone better equipped to live with madness. Where is the line, and how do you know when to quit before you cross it?

It doesn’t help, trying to be sensible. 1000cubic centimetres are more addictive than crack and porn. You start out thinking that it’s fine, everyone else is doing it, and hey, it’s not really addictive and you can quit when you want. And then you find yourself out of control and heavily addicted, with some dealer coming back in an hour to break your kneecaps if you don’t pay up. But, it’s not that easy, being addicted to crack means you can get help, there’s a 12 step programme.

Where’s the 12 step programme to cure the litre high? What’s the first step past announcing to the world that you have a problem? I know I have a problem, I get off 600’s and no argument, they’re quick (for a girls bike). I ride cruisers and find my mind drifting, and 3 seconds later the throttle is pinned out of sheer boredom. Buells? Fine, until mid-fourth gear, then I’m wondering where all the power has gone and why the speedo is moving like it’s in molasses.

Someone posted a link to a GSXR1000 that had been turbo’d. I found myself eyeing up the bike, wondering how I could justify more mods to mine. Or buying it outright. I have a screensaver with a lowered and stretched Hayabusa with nitrous and a turbo. Honestly, being addicted to porn would be more socially acceptable than the thoughts of pinning that on the way home in traffic.

It extends to other parts of my life too. I was chatting with a guy who works in my building, he owns a Lamborghini – I couldn’t get excited about the prospect of a ride in it; its slow in comparison to my bike so how could it be anything other than a disappointment. It’s like meeting the love of your life, no one else will ever be good enough to compare.

What am I supposed to do instead if I go cold turkey? Start knitting? Play an instrument? Learn how to make wicker baskets? I don’t even like most people, and the ones that I do like seem to wear dead cow for fun as well.

No joke, Madbikebabe and I are doing Japanese cooking classes – I’ve never felt like such an alien; the people there are nice, really nice. Nice is the most useless weasel word, it’s like saying something is bland, nice is the new beige. There is one couple who I swear must be faking the level of geekiness that they portray, maybe they’re both really kinky and are part of a swingers club. Tui.

So, full circle, when do you know it’s time to hand over the keys? The simple answer seems to be 3 months after you bought your GixerThou. I guess I must be a slow learner.

[The Pastor]

I’m having more of those moments. The ones where you get off the bike and think, “oh shit”. At what point do you hand the keys of your litre sports bike to someone better equipped to live with madness. Where is the line, and how do you know when to quit before you cross it?

It doesn’t help, trying to be sensible. 1000cubic centimetres are more addictive than crack and porn. You start out thinking that it’s fine, everyone else is doing it, and hey, it’s not really addictive and you can quit when you want. And then you find yourself out of control and heavily addicted, with some dealer coming back in an hour to break your kneecaps if you don’t pay up. But, it’s not that easy, being addicted to crack means you can get help, there’s a 12 step programme.

Where’s the 12 step programme to cure the litre high? What’s the first step past announcing to the world that you have a problem? I know I have a problem, I get off 600’s and no argument, they’re quick (for a girls bike). I ride cruisers and find my mind drifting, and 3 seconds later the throttle is pinned out of sheer boredom. Buells? Fine, until mid-fourth gear, then I’m wondering where all the power has gone and why the speedo is moving like it’s in molasses.

Someone posted a link to a GSXR1000 that had been turbo’d. I found myself eyeing up the bike, wondering how I could justify more mods to mine. Or buying it outright. I have a screensaver with a lowered and stretched Hayabusa with nitrous and a turbo. Honestly, being addicted to porn would be more socially acceptable than the thoughts of pinning that on the way home in traffic.

It extends to other parts of my life too. I was chatting with a guy who works in my building, he owns a Lamborghini – I couldn’t get excited about the prospect of a ride in it; its slow in comparison to my bike so how could it be anything other than a disappointment. It’s like meeting the love of your life, no one else will ever be good enough to compare.

What am I supposed to do instead if I go cold turkey? Start knitting? Play an instrument? Learn how to make wicker baskets? I don’t even like most people, and the ones that I do like seem to wear dead cow for fun as well.

No joke, Madbikebabe and I are doing Japanese cooking classes – I’ve never felt like such an alien; the people there are nice, really nice. Nice is the most useless weasel word, it’s like saying something is bland, nice is the new beige. There is one couple who I swear must be faking the level of geekiness that they portray, maybe they’re both really kinky and are part of a swingers club. Tui.

So, full circle, when do you know it’s time to hand over the keys? The simple answer seems to be 3 months after you bought your GixerThou. I guess I must be a slow learner.
Oh waaaaaaaaaah

[madbikeboy]

Oh waaaaaaaaaah

I was trying to apply humour, not have a cry and then join a support group where people hug each other...

[The Pastor]

I was trying to apply humour, not have a cry and then join a support group where people hug each other...


<img src='http://www.thedeets.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/01/millionaire_idiot_fail.jpg'>

You faild!

[Subike]

Go and visit the guys who reside in your local hospital spinal unit,
Talk to the physios there about the time needed to repair your body after a 200kph+ off. Tell they what you have told us, they will help.
I am sure that they can show you pics of the damage you can cause yourself and others.
Yes The addiction is there, and it can control you.
The adrenilin rush is hard to beat.
Good on you for reconising it, thats the first step in the right direction.
Time now for training your inner boy who wants to play, to play safer.

[Tony.OK]

So, full circle, when do you know it’s time to hand over the keys? .

Ya don't...............ya race the bastard:clap:

[imdying]

Go and visit the guys who reside in your local hospital spinal unit,
Talk to the physios there about the time needed to repair your body after a 200kph+ off. Tell they what you have told us, they will help.
I am sure that they can show you pics of the damage you can cause yourself and others.
Yes The addiction is there, and it can control you.
The adrenilin rush is hard to beat.
Good on you for reconising it, thats the first step in the right direction.
Time now for training your inner boy who wants to play, to play safer.Scare tactics, even self induced, aren't particularly effective... just ask OAB :lol:

[Forest]

Do a decent weekend's worth of riding. Say 1,800km over two days.

I guarantee it will cure you of any attraction to hyper-sports bikes.

[limbimtimwim]

Sounds like fun.

Why quit?

You could die tomorrow of meningitis.

[sidecar bob]

It doesn’t help, trying to be sensible. 1000cubic centimetres are more addictive than crack and porn. You start out thinking that it’s fine, everyone else is doing it, and hey, it’s not really addictive and you can quit when you want.

Maybe P.M Scrivy, He may be able to help, He has a hot Hayabusa & a porn addiction so may have some answers to your problem.
On reflection, the only things he probably knows about your dillema is where you can get a nitrous kit & some tips to some top end porn websites.

[hospitalfood]

i stopped reading your post when you started dissing buells.
hope you die

[The Stranger]

I get off 600’s and no argument, they’re quick (for a girls bike).

I have a screensaver with a lowered and stretched Hayabusa with nitrous and a turbo.

I was chatting with a guy who works in my building, he owns a Lamborghini – I couldn’t get excited about the prospect of a ride in it; its slow in comparison to my bike so how could it be anything other than a disappointment.

What am I supposed to do instead if I go cold turkey?



Learn to corner perhaps?

[slowpoke]

I feel your pain brother :grouphug:

My name is slowpoke and I'm a thou' addict. I'm following the immersion therapy course of treatment hoping that overdosing will lead to a gradual reduction in craving this perverse pleasure. To this effect I've just bought a second thou' to aidin maximising treatment and mortgaged my house to secure copious quantities of fuel at today's prices to satisfy my craving to ride and ensure a full course of treatment is carried out. My wife has left me but this is all to the good as I can now persue my treatment in a more single minded fashion and I'm confident the treatment should start to take effect within the next decade....or two....

[SixPackBack]

*Madbikeboy*..................stop gripin' the throttle like you're chocking your cock.
Seriously what a load of shite :bash:

[dipshit]

Is speed everything?

Ultimately how quickly could you travel between A and B?

At the speed of light? Your journey could be virtually instantaneous if speed is everything.

But where's the fun in that? It's the fun of the journey that counts. Savour it. Enjoy the moment of riding.

Yes you are on a bike capable of 300kph at the drop of hat. It doesn't mean you have to use it. Much like the captain of a Trident submarine doesn't have to use its nuclear arsenal every time they go for a cruise. That firepower is sitting quietly there and everybody knows it.

Just cruise enjoying the moment knowing you are sitting on a machine with devastation in reserve.

[slowpoke]

Bloody hell people, take a deep breathe, loosen your ties, uncurl your white knuckled fists, relax...reelllaaaaaax...............it's just a pisstake not a statutory declaration.

[Chrislost]

Is speed everything?

Ultimately how quickly could you travel between A and B?

At the speed of light? Your journey could be virtually instantaneous if speed is everything.

But where's the fun in that? It's the fun of the journey that counts. Savour it. Enjoy the moment of riding.

Yes you are on a bike capable of 300kph at the drop of hat. It doesn't mean you have to use it. Much like the captain of a Trident submarine doesn't have to use its nuclear arsenal every time they go for a cruise. That firepower is sitting quietly there and everybody knows it.

Just cruise enjoying the moment knowing you are sitting on a machine with devastation in reserve.


some people actually twist that thing on the right bar a little, and find it addictiveeeeeeeeeee:eek5:

[kickingzebra]

Talk to the physios there about the time needed to repair your body after a 200kph+ off.


took me about as long as it took to change a clutch lever and side cover from 220 at teretonga.

[justsomeguy]

Madbikeboy you need to grow up, you sound like a selfish, idiotic, immature, single-minded, stupid kid...





















The only person I know as foolish as you............is me.....:niceone:

[McJim]

It's posts like the first on in this thread that keeps me on a 53hp jigsaw puzzle.:rofl:

[Swoop]

Take up skydiving???

Trackdays?

Where's the problem?:2thumbsup

[Reckless]

Ya don't...............ya race the bastard:clap:

Yep Road race or buy an MX bike. Mxing or trail riding, Now there's a learning curve that never stops! No matter how good you are!! Its Fast, physical, mental, dirty and still on two wheels. You can jump it, thrash it, even somersault it but there's always someone better or faster!:woohoo:

Do it mate give that addiction an alternative!:bash: Many years of karting taught me, once you've been on the track, there's nothing to prove on the road, nothing at all. But the same addiction lead to this http://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/attachment.php?attachmentid=70472&d=1189583986. No need to say how fast, I wasn't racing anyone and I don't feel the need to prove anything to anyone. But even after that (and I blame no one but me) I still yearn for the rush. I was f...cking lucky alot of others haven't been! haha still love that feeling though!

I think the answer for you is road racing!! even casual MXing, but "Do it" man! :scooter: if nothing else it will scratch that itch a bit! LOL!!

Btw: I got your post, but as in the above its bloody hard not to make it sound so damn serious??:whocares:

[madbikeboy]

Go and visit the guys who reside in your local hospital spinal unit,
Talk to the physios there about the time needed to repair your body after a 200kph+ off. Tell they what you have told us, they will help.
I am sure that they can show you pics of the damage you can cause yourself and others.
Yes The addiction is there, and it can control you.
The adrenilin rush is hard to beat.
Good on you for reconising it, thats the first step in the right direction.
Time now for training your inner boy who wants to play, to play safer.

I take it seriously, but I think you're taking it a little too seriously...

[madbikeboy]

Maybe P.M Scrivy, He may be able to help, He has a hot Hayabusa & a porn addiction so may have some answers to your problem.
On reflection, the only things he probably knows about your dillema is where you can get a nitrous kit & some tips to some top end porn websites.

I've got a nitrous kit, can he help me find a turbo? And pron??? Top effort fella!

[madbikeboy]

i stopped reading your post when you started dissing buells.
hope you die

SLOW. SLow. SLOwwwwwwwwwwwwww. But fun to wheelstand. I will die eventually. as will you. :)

[madbikeboy]

I feel your pain brother :grouphug:

My name is slowpoke and I'm a thou' addict. I'm following the immersion therapy course of treatment hoping that overdosing will lead to a gradual reduction in craving this perverse pleasure. To this effect I've just bought a second thou' to aidin maximising treatment and mortgaged my house to secure copious quantities of fuel at today's prices to satisfy my craving to ride and ensure a full course of treatment is carried out. My wife has left me but this is all to the good as I can now persue my treatment in a more single minded fashion and I'm confident the treatment should start to take effect within the next decade....or two....

Bling for you Slowpoke, you get my humour.

[madbikeboy]

Yep Road race or buy an MX bike. Mxing or trail riding, Now there's a learning curve that never stops! No matter how good you are!! Fast, physical, mental, dirty and still on two wheels. You can jump it, thrash it, even somersault it but there's always someone better or faster!:woohoo:

Do it mate give that addiction an alternative!:bash: Many years of karting taught me, once you've been on the track, there's nothing to prove on the road, nothing at all. But the same addiction to this http://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/attachment.php?attachmentid=70472&d=1189583986. No need to say how fast, I wasn't racing anyone and I don't feel the need to prove anything to anyone. But even after that (and I blame no one but me) I still yearn for the rush. I was f...cking lucky alot of others haven't been! haha still love that feeling though!

I think the answer for you is road racing!! even casual MXing, but "Do it" man! :scooter: if nothing else it will scratch that itch a bit! LOL!!

Btw: I got your post, but as in the above its bloody hard not to make it sound so damn serious??:whocares:

I keep breaking bones on MTB's and MX bikes - going to put the race fairings on the gixer, and I'll trailer it to the racetrack!

[Big Dave]

Get a big adventure bike. On the dirt you can scare yourself shitless, test your skill, cross it up, drift it in, get a huge buzz and not go over 80kph.


He didn't diss Buells - he pointed out the difference between a 103hp bike and a 160 hp bike.

That's fair enough - I don't like 160hp bikes because I value my licence too much.

[madbikeboy]

Take up skydiving???

Trackdays?

Where's the problem?:2thumbsup

Skydiving is okay, but trackdays are a rush! Bling for you.

[madbikeboy]

Get a big adventure bike. On the dirt you can scare yourself shitless, test your skill, cross it up, drift it in, get a huge buzz and not go over 80kph.


He didn't diss Buells - he pointed out the difference between a 103hp bike and a 160 hp bike.

That's fair enough - I don't like 160hp bikes because I value my licence too much.


Getting dirty is always fun. CRF450 + Madbikeboy = visit to A&E.

Buells are ok, I like the KTM SuperDuke too, but the SuperDuke seems to have a front wheel made of helium...

[Big Dave]

but the SuperDuke seems to have a front wheel made of helium...


Meh.

<img src="http://homepage.mac.com/david_cohen_design/.Pictures/misc3/30.jpg">

[madbikeboy]

Meh.

<img src="http://homepage.mac.com/david_cohen_design/.Pictures/misc3/30.jpg">

them buells sure do fly...

[fire eyes]

and I thought this was a thread about swinging :shit:

[madbikeboy]

and I thought this was a thread about swinging :shit:

I have no clear recollection of that event... :buggerd:

[fire eyes]

I have no clear recollection of that event... :buggerd:

:eek5: The thread title oowwww lol

crackin up laughin

[Fatjim]

First of all, I'd try getting rid of those rediculous chicken strips.

[Griffin]

Geez people... I ride a Cruiser and even I could recognise the humour in MBB's post. I think theres a lot of bikers on this site who have lost sight of what pisstaking is all about.

Re read it, have a laugh, join the support group... then buy a Cruiser and find true love :)

[madbikeboy]

First of all, I'd try getting rid of those rediculous chicken strips.

Chicken strips? There are none to be found on my scoot, and that goes for the front too... I can post photos...

[vtec]

I've gone thorough the same thing, only with 600's and racing. You never recover from the addiction, and I have a feeling I'll be back racing or at least riding overpowered bikes. Plus I don't really have much to lose anymore. I gave it up because I thought I'd found something worth fighting for more than the adrenalin rush of racing supersport.

But now I'm no longer bicycle courier or serious motorbike racing, and the girl I gave it up for was fucked in the head. So my life feels really empty at the moment, and I have a big gap to fill. I've been filling it with adventure and 250 4stroke racing over here in Aussie, but Melbourne is starting to feel normal, and the 250 four stroke racing is too few and far between, but I can't do much more without help, so I've got a few options for next year:
1. Go back to NZ chase sponsorship for 600's, get a competitive bike, run new tyres, and finally ride to my limits and unleash my true potential, risk my health and life, and go back to bicycle couriering.
2. Go on a backpacking adventure, Europe or South America
3. Go make some serious money in the mines of Australia, and live it up.
4. Keep the status quo, trundling along as a boring Quantity Surveyor, and very part time 250 4 stroke racer.

I'm very torn.

But you're right, sportsbikes are crack, and no matter how many times you hand your keys in it won't be long before you are asking for them back.

Maybe try a motard Aprilia SXV550, powerslides, amazing acceleration, extremely light, wheelies, stoppies, and it's so hard to fuck it up on motards. Plus max speed is less than 200kph, way less chance of death.