Maxine's funny...

[mstriumph]

-To stay relaxed in today's frantic, stressful world, you have to force yourself to stop & put your feet up. I put mine up just high enough to kick the butt of whoever's annoying me.

-The secret to leading a tranquil life is to ignore petty annoyances & save your anger for really serious matters. Like if somebody looks at you funny.

-I don't see the glass as half-empty or half-full. I see it as a glass somebody else has already put their lousy germs on.

-Home computers are the perfect thing for women who don't feel that men provide them with enough frustration.

-Sometimes it helps to count to 10 on your fingers. Or just one, if you know what I'm saying.

-I'll carpool when I can find three people who don't talk, sweat, whistle, or use cologne.

-I enjoy wallpapering, it gives me a chance to brush up on the swear words I haven't used in a while.

-I have a one-step program for dealing with stress. Well, one step and a kick to be exact.

-Caffine is for people who feel they aren't irritable enough on their own.

-The greatest thing about cordless phones is instead of hanging them up on people, you can just throw them.

-Sometimes the days just fly by--except for the day when you have to wait for the cable guy.

-My idea of a high-stress job is any job where you have to work with other people.

-Found something at the swimsuit shop I was really comfortable in. The dressing room.

-I like to give advice to young parents: but "Muzzle that screamin' brat!" isn't very well received.

-Experts say you can relieve stress by petting a cat. 'Course, it doesn't work if the cat's the one making you nuts in the first place.

-If I had a nickel for everytime I've misplaced my keys, there'd be a jarful of money that I'd also have to look for.

-Forgive me if I snap at you. I'm myself today.

-Just saw a three-hankie movie. That's how many I stuffed into the mouth of the talker behind me.

-Sometimes work can be stressful. Especially for people that work with me.

-I'm thinking of renewing my vow...to never get married again.

-I work out every day. Mostly frustrations & anger.

-My definition of " computer chip" is what's left after I sledgehammer the computer.

-Yelling really loud can sometimes ease tension...and sometimes it makes everyone else in the library jump out of their skin.

-Sometimes I wish my blood pressure and my stocks would change places.

-I hate getting behind people who can't drive. It's so hard for them to see my finger in their rearview mirror.

-If your life is an endless series of ups and downs, consider a more supportive bra.

-It's important to vent your frustrations. But you have to recognize the appropriate time and place to vent and blow off steam. For me it's anytime, anyplace.

-Taking a family vacation to get away from stress is like running down the railroad track to get away from the train.

-Call waiting is the perfect thing if you want to interrupt one annoying phone call to make anouther.

-The electric dental drill was invented over 100 years ago.Hurts just to read that doesn't it?

-All I really want is to be understood. Hence, the yelling


disclaimers
- it's friday and i'm bored
- if it's in the wrong place, please move it
- if it's been posted before please forgive me - i did search

ta
;)

[Daffyd]

Love it! I'm a huge fan of Maxine.

[Number One]

"It's important to vent your frustrations. But you have to recognize the appropriate time and place to vent and blow off steam. For me it's anytime, anyplace."

Ohhhhhh yeah! :rofl:

Who is this woman...I think I have a crush :love:

[shafty]

John Wagner, Hallmark artist since 1970, says Maxine was inspired by his mother, his maiden aunts and his grandmother, the woman who bought him art lessons when 'fill in the pumpkins' was about the extent of his art classes at St. John's Catholic School he attended in Leonia , N.J.

John remembers doodling as a preschooler, and says both his grandmother and his mother encouraged his artistic interests. He eventually attended the Vesper George School of Art in Boston , and landed at Hallmark as part of a new artists group.

But it was the birth of the humorous Shoebox Greetings (a tiny little division of Hallmark) in 1986 that added a new dimension to John's professional life. The Shoebox way of seeing the world unleashed his talents and he created Maxine.

'Cartoonists are sensitive to the insanities of the world; we just try to humanize them,' John says.

'If Maxine can get a laugh out of someone who feels lonely or someone who is getting older and hates the thought of another birthday, or if she can make someone chuckle about stressful interpersonal relationships, then I'm happy. Putting a smile on someone's face is what it's all about.'

Those smiles have led to Maxine's becoming a bit of a celebrity. She (and John) have been the subject of media stories, including People, USA Today, Good Morning America, The Wall Street Journal, St. Petersburg (FL) Times, and Las Vegas Journal-Review, and they have been included in a major Associated Press story.

Collector and trade publications have reported that fans nationwide are collecting Maxine items. Letters from consumers and fans to John and Maxine reveal a very personal connection to Maxine. Many people say they are just like Maxine.

Why the name 'Maxine'? 'People at Shoebox started referring to the character as 'John Wagner's old lady,'

And I knew that would get me into trouble with my wife,' John says. The Shoebox team had a contest among themselves to name the character, and three of the approximately 30 entries suggested 'Maxine.

' John says the name is perfect.

John, who says he's humbled by such acceptance of Maxine, admits he's proud of her.