Why I love Noobs and HoBags

[Tank]

Pulled up at the dairy this afternoon with my son in the cage.

Noob rider on a HoBag (bike looked brand new as did all his gear) pulls into the park nose first beside me. As always I say a polite "Hi" as walking past and noob simply gives me a 'fuck off' look. After all - now he rides a bike he is no longer a mild mannered shop assistant - hes a hard ass biker bastard!

Grab son and Ice cream and sit on the bench outside diary with my son. "Why are we eating here dad?" my boy ask.

You will see son, you will see.

Noob comes out of shop - looking too cool for after school. Flicks me another "fuck off" look for having the cheek to say "hi" previously.

Gets on HoBag and for the benefit of old bloke and his kid on the bench revs the fuck out of it.

Wise old Dad laughs.

Noob goes to reverse bike out of park and finds its too steep for him to get the bike out of.

So - if you are the noob on the bright yellow ho'bag who has been stuck in a carpark for the afternoon - Id just like to say "Thanks for the laughs"

[MarkH]

Noob rider on a HoBag (bike looked brand new as did all his gear) pulls into the park nose first beside me. As always I say a polite "Hi" as walking past and noob simply gives me a 'fuck off' look. After all - now he rides a bike he is no longer a mild mannered shop assistant - hes a hard ass biker bastard!

Maybe he is poor & stupid? Couldn't afford to be polite, wasn't smart enough to realise it wouldn't cost him anything :weird: . One day he might come to understand that being polite to people can lead to getting a hand when you make a newbie mistake like parking facing downhill on a vehicle that does not have a reverse gear.

I presume this guy was young? If so then he has time to learn (barring a major catastrophe).

[captain_andrey]

Wasn't me, honestly. I was test riding a Daytona today :Punk:

[CookMySock]

You're a jerk, Tank.

[PrincessBandit]

I hope you very maturely strolled over and asked "would you like a hand there son" and let him see that despite his efforts you were still prepared to give him some help. (i guess not as you imply he might have been stuck there a while....)

[scorpious]

Are yes the old "pulling into a downhill park nose first". Something I'm sure every rider goes through at some stage.

Luckely for me the old FXR150 was quite light.

[PrincessBandit]

Are yes the old "pulling into a downhill park nose first". Something I'm sure every rider goes through at some stage.

Luckely for me the old FXR150 was quite light.

Lol, yeah, happened to me once. Note I said once - learned my lesson!!! Nice random gentleman pulled me back out of the space and didn't even laugh (at least not to my face :laugh:) And that was on the ginny, and I couldn't shift it on my own.....

[Big Dave]

<img src="http://fc01.deviantart.com/fs18/f/2007/211/5/1/THIS_IS_SPARTA_by_toskart.jpg">

[Katman]

After all - now he rides a bike he is no longer a mild mannered shop assistant - hes a hard ass biker bastard!





Ah, yes. The new 'old guard'.

:msn-wink:

[scorpious]

oi!!! Big Dave!!! :Offtopic:

[FJRider]

You're a jerk, Tank.

Humor is where you find it... I find this post hilarious... :innocent: :beer:

[scorpious]

Humor is where you find it... I find this post hilarious... :innocent: :beer:

and I find your avatar hilarious

[rscole]

Ive been there and done that, was on my old SR250... luckily it was light enough for me to pull it out. Now that I have my 'HoBag' it will have to remember not to do it again....

[jrandom]

You're a jerk, Tank.

You're a drooling idiot, dangerous bastard.

:done:

And yes, Tank's story is hilarious. One shitbag-riding n00b who will never park face-down on a slope again. The world just became a better place. Cockles of heart duly warmed, etc.

[slofox]

hehehehe...I woulda stayed to watch as well........:lol:

[racefactory]

You're a drooling idiot, dangerous bastard.

:done:

And yes, Tank's story is hilarious. One shitbag-riding n00b who will never park face-down on a slope again. The world just became a better place. Cockles of heart duly warmed, etc.

Lol agreed.

Yeah alarming amount of people with not a fucking clue on the old hyoshits! Just gives others a bad name.

[Pedrostt500]

I offten have somthing to do with Apprentice fitters at work, some times its just better to let them make a cock of them selves, than keep opening my mouth and been thought of as the Old Fool, who wont let them fly a bit, some times the best learning is done when we make a fist of what we are doing in front of others, once the youngster has realised that he has screwed up I will normaly ask them how they intend to fix it, the key to this is it gets them thinking for themselves.

[Big Dave]

oi!!! Big Dave!!! :Offtopic:

Go the Noob! It isn't, actually.
Tank knows exactly what I mean.

[Pussy]

I hope you very maturely strolled over and asked "would you like a hand there son" and let him see that despite his efforts you were still prepared to give him some help. (i guess not as you imply he might have been stuck there a while....)

The difference being there, PrincessBandit, is I'll bet you didn't try to come across as Dawn the Muss!

[98tls]

Nice,gave me a chuckle.

[FJRider]

To be old and wise... first you must be young and stupid. Nothing changes...

[Bonez]

Go the Noob! It isn't, actually.
Tank knows exactly what I mean.Go on. Do share. This is KB after all.

[Big Dave]

To be old and wise... first you must be young and stupid. Nothing changes...

Experience is a good school - but the fees are high.

[Big Dave]

Go on. Do share. This is KB after all.

This. Is. Sparta. :2thumbsup

[skidMark]

You're a jerk, Tank.

Yeah, and you are about as dangerous as a soccer mum.

(judging by your profile picture)

[Tank]

You're a jerk, Tank.

You're still bitter because I crapped in your helmet - arnt ya?

[blairh]

Haha, that is a classic story... as a noob myself I'm taking this as good advice! Haven't done that myself yet luckily, let's hope I can keep it that way!

[98tls]

You're a jerk, Tank. Why?We have all been young, full of ourselves and done dumb shit whilst being so,its called life.The guy on said Hyo will as time goes by gain experiance whilst losing the attitude and someday probably come across some young fella doing something stupid whilst thinking hes gods gift,when he does he may well have a chuckle as Tank did,as many of us have.That Mellancamp song with the words "when a smoke was a smoke" come to mind.

[boomer]

You're a jerk, Tank.

why.. does it strike a nerve Jeff Tracey?!



Bwaahahahhahaha.. i weeeeeeed.

[raftn]

Youth ...........is wasted on the young!

[FJRider]

Oh to be young and know everything...:laugh:

[rachprice]

hahahahaha I would have laughed too.....
I'm a noob too and probably would have done it sometime, but wouldn't act like an arrogant jerk.
humble pie......

[Quailboy]

Haha classic!

I hope I don't do that, once you've done it theres no turning back (excuse the pun).

Since he was obviously such a prick and thought he was the s**t I would've done the same. If it didn't teach the rider a lesson it must have tought your son a lesson or two- Don't be an arse to people and think before you act, so if you do something stupid then the person you were friendly to will help you out.

[FJRider]

I would have stayed to the bitter end... just because...:laugh::laugh::laugh:

[GrayWolf]

Well you could have been a 'real gentleman' and explained how to reverse the polarity/terminals on the bikes battery, so the starter spun backwards, click into first, press start, slip clutch and??????? Voila a reverse gear!

[Big Dave]

Well you could have been a 'real gentleman' and explained how to reverse the polarity/terminals on the bikes battery, so the starter spun backwards, click into first, press start, slip clutch and??????? Voila a reverse gear!

That's how Goldwings do it. Starter runs it backwards

[Jerry74]

hahahah serves him right for riding a hyosung

[FROSTY]

Ok and the end of the story is??
kid still sitting sorry for himself?
Kid trys riding up onto kerb and topples over.
Kid eats humble pie
Sheesh Im all in suspenders over this earth shattering development

[98tls]

Ok and the end of the story is??
kid still sitting sorry for himself?
Kid trys riding up onto kerb and topples over.
Kid eats humble pie
Sheesh Im all in suspenders over this earth shattering development :shit:This post is worthless without pics.:laugh:

[Tank]

Ok and the end of the story is??
kid still sitting sorry for himself?
Kid trys riding up onto kerb and topples over.
Kid eats humble pie
Sheesh Im all in suspenders over this earth shattering development

No idea - I left him there.

If he had of asked for help - I would have gladly given it to him.

But since my previous "hi" to him obv. wasn't appreciated - I thought why put myself a second time.

Could be still there for I know. Or reading this thread ......

[carver]

no problem, im tough, thats why i look like that, its natural

[Wingnut]

Are yes the old "pulling into a downhill park nose first". Something I'm sure every rider goes through at some stage.

Luckely for me the old FXR150 was quite light.

It doesn't take a genius..........:laugh:

[FJRider]

no problem, im tough, thats why i look like that, its natural

I wondered what caused the damage... natural eh ... ???:laugh::laugh::laugh:

[Ixion]

Don't see the problem., I often park nose first. That's what the little motorcycle lane beside the road is for, so you can get out (just wish they didn't have that big bump getting on to it)

[carver]

I wondered what caused the damage... natural eh ... ???:laugh::laugh::laugh:

if you were as tough as me you'd look tough too

[FJRider]

if you were as tough as me you'd look tough too

I was... then I grew up... :lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:

[carver]

I was... then I grew up... :lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:

i imagine it was more growing out!

[Number One]

Humor is where you find it... I find this post hilarious... :innocent: :beer:
ME TOOO! I just love it when 'noobs' (or others on bikes) look down their noses at me when I'm caging it...despite my being friendly and pretty much always having a looksee over their pride and joy.

I especially love it when I run into them again when riding my bike and then they fall over themselves to be nice to me since I ride a 'grown ups' bike :lol: Of course I am always friendly even when they might've been a stuck up shit previously

Had one of these moments recently. Young dude on a red Hyobag - he even remembered being a snobby cunt to me and said something along the lines of..Oh I didn't realise you rode...Like that excuses rudeness :rolleyes: Honestly civility costs nothing and just because you ride a two wheeled contraption it doesn't make you better than everyone else.

SO yeah I laughed at Tank laughing at the noob

[FJRider]

ME TOOO! I just love it when 'noobs' (or others on bikes) look down their noses at me when I'm caging it...despite my being friendly and pretty much always having a looksee over their pride and joy.



Some of us have bigger "pride and joy's" than others... its nice to see some do check... :innocent:

[Katman]

.......despite my being friendly and pretty........



Oh, pleeeease.

:msn-wink:

[98tls]

All things considered theres plenty out there on "grown ups bikes" that would fare way better with something on par with there riding ability,problem i guess is it wouldnt go with the blimp suit and god forbid one is unfashionable at the latte shop.:oi-grr::pinch:

[Bonez]

Growing up is overrated too.

[FJRider]

All things considered theres plenty out there on "grown ups bikes" that would fare way better with something on par with there riding ability,problem i guess is it wouldnt go with the blimp suit and god forbid one is unfashionable at the latte shop.:oi-grr::pinch:

Vespa sales would rocket...

[98tls]

Growing up is overrated too. "Every child is an artist,the problem is how to remain an artist when grown up"

[FJRider]

Growing up is overrated too.

Growing up is easy... acting your age is the hard bit...

[Bonez]

Growing up is easy... acting your age is the hard bit...
Acting like an old goat ya mean?

[FJRider]

Acting like an old goat ya mean?

Yeh .... Some find it easier than others... and do it well....

[Number One]

Some of us have bigger "pride and joy's" than others... its nice to see some do check... :innocent:

It's not the size that matters...it's what you do with it eh? :laugh:


Oh, pleeeease.

:msn-wink:

Nice selective quote...BUT I would never call myself pretty :msn-wink:

[Insanity_rules]

Love it, Karma! So there endith the lesson.

[rphenix]

hahahah serves him right for riding a hyosung

The newer Hyo's have a lighter dry weight than your ZR250 so that doesn't have anything to do with getting stuck. The only thing I can think of is karma :)

[DMNTD]

It's not the size that matters...it's what you do with it eh? :laugh:

Liar..... :done:

[imne1]

Haha, that is a classic story... as a noob myself I'm taking this as good advice! Haven't done that myself yet luckily, let's hope I can keep it that way!
Ditto !! although he could have just turned it. like this : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ou8Ueancb90

[FJRider]

Nice selective quote...BUT I would never call myself pretty :msn-wink:

as long as HE does...:sunny::sunny::sunny::niceone:

[PrincessBandit]

Oh to be young and know everything...:laugh:

I still am, and do. :rofl:


It's not the size that matters...it's what you do with it eh? :laugh:


Hey, you sound like Conquistador. Wot you 2 been up to then.....????

[vifferman]

Ditto !! although he could have just turned it. like this : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ou8Ueancb90
Huh... I'm disappointed.
When I was young smartarse, I used to turn my bikes by leaning them to the left just like that, then revving them up, and dropping the clutch. I thought that Noobtube vid might've been the same...

[Gubb]

You're a jerk, Tank.

Ahahaha!

Let me guess, it was one of your 30 assorted-Hyosungs and your son riding, and he still isn't home for Dinner?

[imne1]

Huh... I'm disappointed.
When I was young smartarse, I used to turn my bikes by leaning them to the left just like that, then revving them up, and dropping the clutch. I thought that Noobtube vid might've been the same...

Oh you mean like this? : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eyhgsVz02bA&NR=1
it looks rather like it would require more space than the other way. How big was the parking space Tank?

[xwhatsit]

Haha! Oh well, I've learned similar lessons about the drawbacks of being a cunt. Some would say I've still got quite a few to learn :D

Sometimes there's only one way to get a clue -- although it would've been even more effective if you'd gone up to him and offered him a hand! That would've really been piss in his porridge.

[Brett]

Yeah, and you are about as dangerous as a soccer mum.

(judging by your profile picture)

LMAO. Owned by skiddy...


I find it a rather amusing story, if the bloke wants to be a knob end and others get the chance to laugh at him, then it is nothing but his own fault.

[no-coast-punk]

My favorite N00b story was watching a guy with a brand new shiny blue GSXR-600 wad up an engine in a parking lot. Here in the states someone on a learners permit is allowed to go out and buy whatever they want. There are plenty of sub 1000 mile wrecked busa's for sale in these parts.

It was a cold night (~4C) and we were all having a big get together (when it's cold 6 months out of the year, we're out in force unless there is snow on the ground). Dude only had like 1,000 miles on the clock.

He starts the bike up dead stone cold after it had been sitting for 2 hours or so. Lets it idle for about 3 seconds and then proceeds to hold the throttle against the limiter for another 15 seconds to show his buddies how cool his new pipes sounded.

The rest of in the audience were treated to a *clink* *clink* *pop* sound and the bike never started again. A dude that was there that night worked at the local 'zuke dealership and was tasked with putting humpty back together again. He said the thing sucked in 3 valves because the valves hadn't had enough heat to properly expand into the keepers. No warranty either :)

[Grin-T]

I wonder why some people are so stuck up and not say HI. Were you saying it in a tone where he thinks you and your kid were mocking him? Haha.. :laugh:

[Brett]

You're a jerk, Tank.

Piss take?

[PirateJafa]

Noob goes to reverse bike out of park and finds its too steep for him to get the bike out of.

I've helped a couple of girls out of this predicament (You know who you are!).

Still don't understand what the problem is personally. Just ride up onto the footpath - that's what you pay your taxes to use after all!

[Morcs]

lol hobag riders...

we had 2 riding with us yesterday, and was quite funny to see them overtake me on the motorway, and then looking real smug about it... the fact that im leasurely cruising at 145, one handed, and they are going flat tack didnt seem to register with them...

[Gubb]

How does one look smug under a helmet?

[scorpious]

Ditto !! although he could have just turned it. like this : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ou8Ueancb90

that was sweet as!!!

[scorpious]

can you believe it?!!
I'm going to dye my hair blond or somehing.
Here we are talking about parking a bike nose first and I go for a ride and guess what?...I parked my fucking triunph nose first lol:angry2::angry2::sick::angry::angry::mad::brick ::brick::weird:

[boomer]

lol hobag riders...

we had 2 riding with us yesterday, and was quite funny to see them overtake me on the motorway, and then looking real smug about it... the fact that im leasurely cruising at 145, one handed, and they are going flat tack didnt seem to register with them...


You should have pulled a wheelie then slapped ya ass.. then done the KB wave ...

[Tank]

then done the KB wave ...

What a great idea - a KB wave .....<_<

[Gummie]

Thought tank might be talking about me,:shifty: but im friendly.
Still new bike new gear and get stuck occasionaly.:doh:
But that gives me a chuckle if no ones looking.

[toycollector10]

What sort of motorcycle is a hobag? I think it's disrespectful to the rider

[Tank]

What sort of motorcycle is a hobag? I think it's disrespectful to the rider

The rider in this instance was given polite respect but didn't have the decency to reply in a like manner. He brought it in on himself.

So fuck'em.

HoBag = Hyosong

[Soul.Trader]

No idea - I left him there.

If he had of asked for help - I would have gladly given it to him.

But since my previous "hi" to him obv. wasn't appreciated - I thought why put myself a second time.

Could be still there for I know. Or reading this thread ......

With your obvious sense of superiority, the question must be raised - what makes you think you're a better person than he is? You left a newbie stuck there, and what's more you watched in amusement, and shared this with your son? Wow, what a great person you are.

[fireliv]

That fucking funny! Would have done the same. What goes around comes around. But agreed if he asked for help, I prob would have helped. But since I;m a useless chick, who wouldnt know the front end from the back I would doubt that any guy in his situation would ask!

[Tank]

With your obvious sense of superiority, the question must be raised - what makes you think you're a better person than he is? You left a newbie stuck there, and what's more you watched in amusement, and shared this with your son? Wow, what a great person you are.

If you were polite and nice to someone and they were deliberately rude to you - would you go out of your way to help them?

Despite his rudeness - I was willing to help should he have been smart enough to ask for assistance.

Yep - I shared it with my son - he learnt a life lesson - a good default position to have is being nice to people - it pays back in spades.

So do I think Im a better person than the noob? - no - not at all - but I do think I was more polite and that I'm smarter than he was.

And I bet that if it was me that had of parked in nose first I would not have got myself into a position that I was embarrassed about my behavior that I thought I couldn't ask someone for help.

[Taz]

Are yes the old "pulling into a downhill park nose first". Something I'm sure every rider goes through at some stage.

Luckely for me the old FXR150 was quite light.

Only those who don't think the situation thru.......

[PrincessBandit]

What a great idea - a KB wave .....<_<

Isn't it the same as the mexican one? Look ma(te), no hands....... And let's not forget to stand on the footpegs at the same time just to complete the look. :doh:

[PrincessBandit]

p.s. i want to try that 180/360 move with the ginny one day; that would be so cool to be able to do (especially if i had to do it to help out a poor male rider who got himself stuck...."stand aside babe, this is a job for your bike-angel" lol) Reckon I'd be struggling to pull that move with my bandit tho, so back to the gym :rolleyes:

[toycollector10]

Yeah, yeah, I'm just an old cnut but I know that good manners have gone down the drain:

Hold a door open for a woman and get a "F*ck you, pig" look. Or better still, be completely ignored as if the door just magically opened because her fu*kin' highness approached it!

Hold a door open for a man and don't get a "F*ck you, mate," I don't get nutt'in.

Step off a narrow wakling track for a group of runners to go through and don't get a "Thanks mate". Nothing, except a big gob of spit landing a foot away from you.

Walk towards a lift that is just staring to close and, well, f*ck you mate, I can't be bothered holding the lift for one point five seconds so you can make the ride too.

So life is full of these slights from cnuts who don't care for their fellow man. And if the jumped up Hobag rider can't say hello or nod back and then finds himself in the crap I say "bloody good show".

Might teach him some manners.

But you wouldn't want to hold your breath now, would you?

[Tank]

Hold a door open for a woman and get a "F*ck you, pig" look. Or better still, be completely ignored as if the door just magically opened because her fu*kin' highness approached it!



Funnily enough I always hold the door open for women. Generally when one walks thru without even as much as a smile - I say (extremely nicely) "Well, you're welcome - you have a great day"

Most have an embarrassed look on their faces because they know that they are being rude.

[nivram]

Bloody Hyo riders, they give us all a bad name :)

[Flip]

It probably would have been the final insult if you had offered to push his bike back after he had made such a nob of himself.
The world is full of people like this, its up to you how you react or don't react to them. At least you didn't get in his face and tear him a new one, but I bet it was tempting.
Good yarn, thanks.

[Soul.Trader]

<boring tirade>

Perhaps it's just your pessimistic outlook causing you to hate the world so much? I'm always polite, holding doors for males and females alike, and performing other generally accepted courteous gestures, and I'm greeted with thanks and politeness in return almost every time. But I guess not being a self righteous cunt helps me see the world in a slightly nicer light.

And if you'd helped the guy get his bike out, you'd probably have found he was quite thanful, and you would probably have helped improve his attitude.

[Big Dave]

Tank has merely followed the code appropriately. Well done the Tanker.

[madbikeboy]

Perhaps it's just your pessimistic outlook causing you to hate the world so much? I'm always polite, holding doors for males and females alike, and performing other generally accepted courteous gestures, and I'm greeted with thanks and politeness in return almost every time. But I guess not being a self righteous cunt helps me see the world in a slightly nicer light.

And if you'd helped the guy get his bike out, you'd probably have found he was quite thanful, and you would probably have helped improve his attitude.

And your reward for all these good deeds is being a junior accountant... :doh: Did you just call Tank a self righteous cunt by implication. Did you know he's the size of a, erm, tank?

[Gubb]

Did you know he's the size of a, erm, tank?

Pffft.

Tank's tiny. I could pick him up and put him in my pocket.

[Big Dave]

Pffft.

Tank's tiny. I could pick him up and put him in my pocket.

Shirt pocket.

[madbikeboy]

shhhhhhh! Soul Trader is probably quaking in his sensible patent leather shoes and cheap suit, all the while wondering when Tank will come marching into his Dad's accounting firm to find him...

:bleh:

[xwhatsit]

shhhhhhh! Soul Trader is probably quaking in his sensible patent leather shoes and cheap suit
Bright red sensible patent leather shoes and fluoro yellow and orange suit with white reflective stripes, don't forget. Motorcyclists shouldn't be allowed to wear b (http://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/showthread.php?t=66347)lack after all.

[Tank]

Did you know he's the size of a, erm, tank?

Well - I do need to lose some weight.

For what its worth - the name came back from the days I used to fight. Apparently I was never too hot on the subtleties of boxing and my approach was more umm 'basic' - thus the nickname 'Tank' was born (it also goes with my last name).

[toycollector10]

Did that soul trader just call me a "Pessimistic, World Hatin', Self Righteous Cnut?"

But the world needs people like me! So you can point your f*ckin' fingers and say, "Dat's the bad guy!"


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