Laugh Out Loud

[James Deuce]

"Mary-Kate Olsen has sparked rumours she is expecting her first child after her weight shot up to 46 kilograms, according to National Enquirer magazine."

I'm picking she accidentally ate something.

http://www.stuff.co.nz/4777746a1860.html

[Hitcher]

Indeed. Chewing her food rather than swallowing it whole sounds like a plan.

[jrandom]

I think my weight shot down by 46 kilograms when I took a dump this morning.

Perhaps these matters are interrelated.

[Fatjim]

"She wanted the same kind of fulfilment in her life that Heath found in his after becoming a dad."

lofl.

Other stupid stuff in the news

"Study links abortion to depression" - no kidding.
"Waiting time targets will need more staff, nurses say" - ya think?
"NZ lose by innings and 62 runs "- suprise suprise

[Mikkel]

"Study links abortion to depression" - no kidding.


No wonder since you have to produce a valid reason behind an abortion - and apparently "I feel incompetent to raise a child." or "I do not want to be a parent." are not good enough.

However "I feel I might get a depression if I have to give birth to child right now." seems to be generally accepted.

At least that's what I've heard from people working in the health sector.

[Kendog]

I saw the heading, but was not interested in reading the article.

Those that read the article make me laugh :bleh:

[The Stranger]

I think my weight shot down by 46 kilograms when I took a dump this morning.

Perhaps these matters are interrelated.

Doubtful, unless you were eating Mary-Kate Olsen last night.

[jrandom]

Doubtful, unless you were eating Mary-Kate Olsen last night.

I bet you wouldn't say no to that.

[Hitcher]

No wonder since you have to produce a valid reason behind an abortion - and apparently "I feel incompetent to raise a child." or "I do not want to be a parent." are not good enough.

However "I feel I might get a depression if I have to give birth to child right now." seems to be generally accepted.

At least that's what I've heard from people working in the health sector.

Pious twaddle like this does nothing to promote reasoned debate in what is a highly charged, emotional and incredibly personal decision. Despite what the god botherers may think, abortion is a decision that few women take lightly and something that men are largely incompetent to comment on.

[vifferman]

I bet you wouldn't say no to that.
I would.
I find her distinctly unappealitising.

[Sully60]

I would.
I find her distinctly unappealitising.
I'm with him.
I'd rather lick the congealed fat from a two week old lamb roast, at least you'd know it was well fed at some stage.

[nodrog]

what a fat bitch

[R6_kid]

I could LOSE that much weight and I'd still only just be on the lower side of what is considered a healthy weight for my height.

[Mikkel]

Pious twaddle like this does nothing to promote reasoned debate in what is a highly charged, emotional and incredibly personal decision. Despite what the god botherers may think, abortion is a decision that few women take lightly and something that men are largely incompetent to comment on.

Pious? Me? :gob:

I completely agree with what you write here, which is why it is absurd that women are not allowed to make their own choice based upon whatever their reasons are. And that was the point of the post you quoted.

[sunhuntin]

No wonder since you have to produce a valid reason behind an abortion - and apparently "I feel incompetent to raise a child." or "I do not want to be a parent." are not good enough.

However "I feel I might get a depression if I have to give birth to child right now." seems to be generally accepted.

At least that's what I've heard from people working in the health sector.

theres a debate in the local rag between certain tossers arguing the pros and cons of abortion. the main player for the anti team is a former co worker we all called "babymakers" cos hes got like 20 kids. abortion is done for many reasons, and sometimes the baby will have major defects if they survive birth. id like to see all the anti abortion god botherers offer to adopt all the babies who are born like that. other times, the parents to be dont feel confident to do a good job.
there was an article in one of the womens mags last week... a 22 year old begging to have her tubes tied. shes super fertile and has had 4 abortions after falling pregnant... while both sides were using contraception. she cannot financially support more than the one kid she does have.

[Mikkel]

a 22 year old begging to have her tubes tied. shes super fertile and has had 4 abortions after falling pregnant... while both sides were using contraception.

They must be doing something wrong... :crazy: Sometimes people just get it wrong, one way or the other.

My father, a gp, once had a couple where she had trouble getting pregnant and they wanted it real bad. So anyway, my father goes to perform a gynaecological exam on her... She was still a virgin, we can only wonder what they've been doing instead. :scratch:

I, to some extent, can appreciate the counter argument that playing master over life and death, choosing your offspring at whim are things that should not be made trivial. However, I fail to see what they are hoping to achieve besides control over other people's behaviour. Combine it with a general stance against contraception and it becomes downright grotesque.

[Madness]

my father goes to perfect a gynaecological exam on her... She was still a virgin

Nice to know he has pride in his work. Perfection may not have been required though, not like she had anything to compare it to.

As for the Olsen twins, I doubt I could do either of them. It'd be like shagging yer 7 year old cousin.

No, I'm not from Edgecumbe.

[ManDownUnder]

"Mary-Kate Olsen has sparked rumours she is expecting her first child after her weight shot up to 46 kilograms, according to National Enquirer magazine."

I'm picking she accidentally ate something.



So you reckon she swallows?

[Mikkel]

Nice to know he has pride in his work. Perfection may not have been required though, not like she had anything to compare it to.

Curse these 10 thumbs. :) Error corrected.

[Coyote]

I think my weight shot down by 46 kilograms when I took a dump this morning.

Perhaps these matters are interrelated.
I think you should see a doctor about that.

[Number One]

No wonder since you have to produce a valid reason behind an abortion - and apparently "I feel incompetent to raise a child." or "I do not want to be a parent." are not good enough.

However "I feel I might get a depression if I have to give birth to child right now." seems to be generally accepted.

At least that's what I've heard from people working in the health sector.

And so you are back, from wherever it was that you were...and the first post of yours that I see and all I can say is that I concur with Hitcher completely. Except for the silly little girls who literally do think abortions are just a handy way to 'take care of business' because mummy and daddy don't know I have sex and I can't be arsed getting the pill or making that pimply dicked young man I'm boffing wear a condom - a lot of women who find themselves contemplating an abortion seriously are probably already depressed well before they have even had to 'justify' their decision.


Pious twaddle like this does nothing to promote reasoned debate in what is a highly charged, emotional and incredibly personal decision. Despite what the god botherers may think, abortion is a decision that few women take lightly and something that men are largely incompetent to comment on.

Green for you and that bolded bit is on the money. When you have had your first d&c Mikkel then come talk to me.


Pious? Me? :gob:

I completely agree with what you write here, which is why it is absurd that women are not allowed to make their own choice based upon whatever their reasons are. And that was the point of the post you quoted.

It's that Denmark phrasing getting you in trouble again - best you not go to far down this road eh.

As for little miss skeletor..ooops best not pick on her as she is skinny and you know how us fat girls like to give them shit about not being overweight :rolleyes: anyway I agree with Sully60 I wouldn't do her either. I do hope though that if she is pregnant she can put some more meat on her bones - cos pregnancy can be a rough ride for some.

[jrandom]

As for little miss skeletor..ooops best not pick on her as she is skinny and you know how us fat girls like to give them shit about not being overweight

It's funny because it's true!

Anyway, have you ever read The Pre-Persons (http://everything2.com/index.pl?node_id=1525070), by Philip K Dick? I happened to read it last weekend.

It's an excellent intentionally-provocative treatment of the subject, and, I think, a good argument for being able to legally kill our kids before a certain age.

Imagine the motivational force of being able to issue a completely legal death threat! They'd never forget to brush their teeth again.

:yes:

[Kendog]

It's funny because it's true!

Anyway, have you ever read The Pre-Persons (http://everything2.com/index.pl?node_id=1525070), by Philip K Dick? I happened to read it last weekend.

It's an excellent intentionally-provocative treatment of the subject, and, I think, a good argument for being able to legally kill our kids before a certain age.

Imagine the motivational force of being able to issue a completely legal death threat! They'd never forget to brush their teeth again.

:yes:

I am not sure kids would respond to a death threat, would they really know what death means?

Just look at the slightly older kids that ride motorbikes. A lot of them clearly don't understand what death is either.

[jrandom]

I am not sure kids would respond to a death threat, would they really know what death means?

I explained death to my kids a couple of years ago by taking them goat shooting and then getting them to help butcher the beast.

"Good lad, you hold the black sack open, and I'll tip the guts in..."

They understand death just fine now. And they really don't want to be the goat.

Oddly enough, they weren't put off eating it that night in the slightest.


Just look at the slightly older kids that ride motorbikes. A lot of them clearly don't understand what death is either.

I bet their dads never took them goat shooting.

[007XX]

Imagine the motivational force of being able to issue a completely legal death threat! They'd never forget to brush their teeth again.

:yes:

Darn...ran out of bling for you again!

Admitedly, if the parent issuing the threat has an ounce of genuine authority, the kid(s) should not even think of second guessing the seriousness of the said threat.

Obviously carrying out the threat after 2 warnings in earlier years makes credibility all the more potent. Not actual death of course, don't be silly !

Failing scenario: (hypothetical situation with Little Johnny being 5 years old)

Parent: "Johnny, go brush your teeth!"

Johnny: "Nah, I don't wanna!"

Parent: "Johnny, I'm warning you....Go brush you teeth!"

Johnny: " Nah, I don't wanna and you can't make me!"

Parent: "Look Johnny, be a good boy and listen to Mummy /Daddy"

Johnny: ....throws himself on the ground while stomping feet on the ground, etc...Parents look on helplessly, blah, blah, we all have seen someone in that situation.

In my view, the parents should have been aborted but eh, it's just my opinion.

[sinfull]

I bet their dads never took them goat shooting.
Don't shoot Billy daddy !!!!

[jrandom]

Don't shoot Billy daddy !!!!

You'd be surprised (nah, you probably wouldn't actually) at how bloodthirsty a five-year-old can be.

:shit:

[Mom]

Johnny: ....throws himself on the ground while stomping feet on the ground, etc...Parents look on helplessly, blah, blah, we all have seen someone in that situation.

In my view, the parents should have been aborted but eh, it's just my opinion.


I have a good example of this. One of my foster kids aged 7, little girl (we called her Miss Moo because she was so grumpy and uncooperative) often used to refuse to do things, like walk to the car, or go to bed or, or, or... Now as you cant wallop the snot out of kids I used to pick her up and carry her...LOL

Miss Moo is refusing to get in the bath, I warned her I would pick her up and put her in the bath if she did not get on with it. Seems my previous follow through had not registered with her. I simply picked her up fully clothed and put her in the bath. Well what a carry on! Shrieking and crying and splashing, it was actually really funny so I laughed. Never had a problem getting her in the bath after that.

[007XX]

IMiss Moo is refusing to get in the bath, I warned her I would pick her up and put her in the bath if she did not get on with it. Seems my previous follow through had not registered with her. I simply picked her up fully clothed and put her in the bath. Well what a carry on! Shrieking and crying and splashing, it was actually really funny so I laughed. Never had a problem getting her in the bath after that.

Exacary!!!

Perfect example of the fact that we can be good parents without the walloping...it just takes a little imagination, perseverance and back bone.

[Trudes]

That's the beauty of kids when they're small enough you can pick them up/pin them and make them do what you want, the problem arises when they are too big to pick them up or pin, then you're in shit! However, usually if you've employed the first tactic of "I'm the boss around here, you do as I say until you're old enough to pay rent" you won't need to be afraid of your kids once they are big enough to beat the snot out of you. Is there a law against parent abuse?

[Mom]

Exacary!!!

Perfect example of the fact that we can be good parents without the walloping...it just takes a little imagination, perseverance and back bone.

Oh there are many ways of doing it. I had 6 kids, 3 of mine, and 3 foster kids (Miss Moo being one). We went to a Guy Fawkes thing at the school, it was dark when we left and I wanted to keep the kids in sight, I told them to stay in sight but 2 of the boys kept running off into the dark. Couple of warnings I would make them hold hands if they took off again, and off they went. SO I get them back, hold one hand, brother holds brothers hand and we walked out of school. How embarrassing for them. Worked though, never had that problem again.

My best shaming out invention though was a little pink plastic chair. I used to put it out in the turn around of our driveway and if the kids played up, they had to go and sit there. Ten year old boys hate being humiliated like that, it was my favourite thing. The threat of some time on the pink chair worked wonders for me :sunny:

[007XX]

My best shaming out invention though was a little pink plastic chair. I used to put it out in the turn around of our driveway and if the kids played up, they had to go and sit there. Ten year old boys hate being humiliated like that, it was my favourite thing. The threat of some time on the pink chair worked wonders for me :sunny:

bahahahha...excellent!

I might have to pick your brain in the near future if #2 is proving to be more of a handful than my eldest was.

Mind you, I think I can still scare the bejesus out of little kids...it's like bycicle eh!

[Mom]

Is there a law against parent abuse?


No but you dont need it. My son changed when he turned 18, got all, "you cant stop me" and "I'm 18, I can do what I want" overnight it seemed. Even after I pointed out he was still in my home so had to live by the rules he continued. Came to a head one night and he told me to "Get fucked!", there may have even been "you stupid, psycho whore" in there somewhere. I threw him out! Seriously, told him to pack and bag and get out of the house.

He came to me a couple of hours later and asked if he could stay the night, as he had not been able to find somewhere to stay. I said yes, but to make it number 1 priority to find somewhere the next day. He did, and moved out that weekend. Best thing I could have done. He learned I wont take shit like that, and he also learned what a cruisy number he actually had at home. He grew up so fast!

We have a fantastic relationship, lots of hugs and "I love yous". Dont be soft on them anytime, they do turn out right in the end.