View Full Version : Coffee break while riding. Argh!
Fatt Max
11th December 2008, 09:28
Jeez, I reckon I must have upset someone in a previous life…
Had to duck out the door from work on an errand, decided to take the bike rather than one of the pool cars.
Cruising nicely along Tamaki Drive heading to Kohi and am behind a Mercedes station wagon with two ladies in the front. Both are smoking with the windows down.
Next thing, the driver flicks her fag butt out the window, breeze catches it and hits me straight on the visor, no damage but a bit shocked, filthy habit.
Then the passenger does the same, flicks her fag out the window and the fecking thing lands in my lap….arrrrggghhhh, my bell end is on fire…..:argh:
But wait, there’s more……
Next thing I know, the passenger empties the dregs of her take away coffee out the window and I get the whole lot all over my fecking jacket. Now I have a coffee drenched jacket and the future of NZ is about to catch fire. I pull into the lay-by at the public grunters at mission bay and sort myself out.
Can you f*****g adam and eve it, I thought this week was going so well….:crybaby:
….and the coffee was a trim latte, what the f**k do I want with a trim anything….:angry2:
Curry and lager tonight…:woohoo:
slofox
11th December 2008, 09:38
Jeeeez Max - given your propensity for trouble I don't think I will go riding with you after all.......:rofl:
I think I might have been tempted to damage their motor vehicle myself.....:ar15:
nodrog
11th December 2008, 09:40
http://www.toolspotting.net/images/fatmax_xtremetape.jpg
gijoe1313
11th December 2008, 09:43
:blink: Well good gosh magolly, at this rate you will be fast turning into the comedy central of bikers! Fawlty towers, Mr.Bean and Some Mothers do 'ave them all rolled into one ...
I think the Biker God are looking for a new court jester and they have decided to gift you with the hobby horse to ride! :sweatdrop
racerhead
11th December 2008, 10:04
I think at times like this punching mirrors off should be allowed to point out their stupidity because I think they would be too dumb to notice anything else:mad:
Reido
11th December 2008, 10:24
I think at times like this punching mirrors off should be allowed to point out their stupidity because I think they would be too dumb to notice anything else:mad:
exactly, well they're not using them, so why should they have them at all?
oh right... so get a wof.. right?
some people are just ignorant i guess
Marmoot
11th December 2008, 10:29
Then the passenger does the same, flicks her fag out the window and the fecking thing lands in my lap….arrrrggghhhh, my bell end is on fire…..:argh:
Hahahhahahah, his balls got touched by a fag!
Fatt Max
11th December 2008, 10:30
Hahahhahahah, his balls got touched by a fag!
...and it was very emotional, I can tell you.....:hug:
Slyer
11th December 2008, 10:33
Don't ever stop riding mate. :jerry:
kevfromcoro
11th December 2008, 10:41
jeez FM... What are you going to be like when you progress to a biger bike.
get an adventure bike..and come for a ride
think we would be picking you out of trees...ditches... rivers....even the sea...
keep posting
its a laugh.........................
Tank
11th December 2008, 10:51
Hahahhahahah, his balls got touched by a fag!
If I was allowed to bling - I'd give you one for that - very very funny.
Slyer
11th December 2008, 10:54
If I was allowed to bling - I'd give you one for that - very very funny.
I've already blinged him for you.
Fatt Max
11th December 2008, 10:59
Hahahhahahah, his balls got touched by a fag!
Also, do not forget that I spend a good couple of hours each day with my arse firmly planted on an intruder......:bleh:
portokiwi
11th December 2008, 11:01
Why bling him he was fag baged:lol:
I would have followed those crazy cows and left a little sign of my own on there vech.
mashman
12th December 2008, 11:08
You should have grabbed the smoke, ridden along side and thrown it back in the car!!! I've been covered in McD's, orange juice, whatever that smelly shit is in the windscreen washer tub, dodged nappies and i'm pretty sure there's much more so completely sympathise with you... after being summarily drenched by some young tossers in a Skyline washing their windscreen a couple of months ago (not that any water hit their windscreen)... i've been contemplating how I could rig up a water cannon to the bike so that I can respond in kind...
firefighter
12th December 2008, 11:29
Jeez, I reckon I must have upset someone in a previous life…
Had to duck out the door from work on an errand, decided to take the bike rather than one of the pool cars.
Cruising nicely along Tamaki Drive heading to Kohi and am behind a Mercedes station wagon with two ladies in the front. Both are smoking with the windows down.
Next thing, the driver flicks her fag butt out the window, breeze catches it and hits me straight on the visor, no damage but a bit shocked, filthy habit.
Then the passenger does the same, flicks her fag out the window and the fecking thing lands in my lap….arrrrggghhhh, my bell end is on fire…..:argh:
But wait, there’s more……
Next thing I know, the passenger empties the dregs of her take away coffee out the window and I get the whole lot all over my fecking jacket. Now I have a coffee drenched jacket and the future of NZ is about to catch fire. I pull into the lay-by at the public grunters at mission bay and sort myself out.
Can you f*****g adam and eve it, I thought this week was going so well….:crybaby:
….and the coffee was a trim latte, what the f**k do I want with a trim anything….:angry2:
Curry and lager tonight…:woohoo:
maybe your one of those people who aren't supposed to go outside?
You seem to have all the things happen to you that people with Agoraphobia worry about.:blink:
klingon
12th December 2008, 11:51
:blink: Well good gosh magolly, at this rate you will be fast turning into the comedy central of bikers! Fawlty towers, Mr.Bean and Some Mothers do 'ave them all rolled into one ...
I think the Biker God are looking for a new court jester and they have decided to gift you with the hobby horse to ride! :sweatdrop
Oooh we should have a TV show featuring Max & his adventures! Better still - a reality TV show! I volunteer to follow him around with a movie camera. :2thumbsup
You should have grabbed the smoke, ridden along side and thrown it back in the car!!! I've been covered in McD's, orange juice, whatever that smelly shit is in the windscreen washer tub, dodged nappies and i'm pretty sure there's much more so completely sympathise with you... after being summarily drenched by some young tossers in a Skyline washing their windscreen a couple of months ago (not that any water hit their windscreen)... i've been contemplating how I could rig up a water cannon to the bike so that I can respond in kind...
Ooohh I get so fed up with those windscreen washer over-sprays. :mad: Here I am with a nice clean visor and a nice clean bike and they spray me with their dirty scummy water with goodness-knows-what corrosive rubbish in it.
mdnzz
13th December 2008, 09:35
another good laff thanx FM.
I seconed the reality show, just a week following Max shoudl provide enough material for at least 6 months viewing.
On a positive note though
If FatMax is attracting all the idiots out there then that should (in theory) leave clean clear roads ahead for riding :clap:
Maha
13th December 2008, 10:32
On the motorway once heading south and a lady flicked her butt (and by that I mean cigarette end) out the window and the old boy driving gave her a stern talking to, I could see his finger waving and pointing to what was behind them (us) Frostys thread about 'Nose and smells' ? smelling cigarette smoke is another smell that is to be weary of, most of the time they dont care and will flick it out the window. Bastards!
Road Guardian
13th December 2008, 10:54
Fatt Max you should rename your self Shit Magnet
prettybillie
16th December 2008, 12:12
Hahahhahahah, his balls got touched by a fag!
OUCH!!!!!! :doh:
Skyryder
16th December 2008, 12:57
I just hope the boys in blue see this as it is one reason we do not like to ride behind vehicles and sometimes need to speed up as a safety precaution.
Skyryder
sunhuntin
16th December 2008, 13:10
On the motorway once heading south and a lady flicked her butt (and by that I mean cigarette end) out the window and the old boy driving gave her a stern talking to, I could see his finger waving and pointing to what was behind them (us) Frostys thread about 'Nose and smells' ? smelling cigarette smoke is another smell that is to be weary of, most of the time they dont care and will flick it out the window. Bastards!
yep, i can smell ciggy smoke several cars in advance. ive managed to dodge many this way.
bit different with on coming traffic though. was out on my favourite country road. oncoming car blasts past, and i see and feel something yellow just miss my eye. my first thought was a bee, but there werent any stripes. ive now worked out it was a butt. as it was coming up to dusk, i wasnt wearing my normal sunglasses. im damn lucky that it missed!
max... you poor bastard. hope you can wash the coffee and shit off ya gear.
Swampdonkey
16th December 2008, 13:19
Max, after reading some of your exploits lately .I need to ask you to call me if you decide to come up north for a ride this summer........ so i can alert the authorities to get some barriers up ...its just to risky.
keep up the posts.
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