Biff
14th February 2005, 10:26
A few years back my uncle told me a story, a story he swore to be the truth. As shocking/amusing (?) as it is, I still have my doubts. Here it is. Decide for yourself:
It was a sunny weekend afternoon and my uncle was driving home from a game of golf through some country lanes. As he reached a small row of country houses a cat ran out in front of his car. He felt a small bump and looked in his rear view mirror, but the cat wasn't to be seen. So he pulled over in order to look for said cat.
At first my uncle couldn’t find the it. Then on the pavement he saw a cat lying very still. It’s breathing was shallow and it looked to him as though it was about to take it's last breath. Being a country type he was used to dispatching (killing) any animals that he thought were suffering. So he went to the trunk of his car and removed a wheel brace. He approached the cat, waited a second and then brought the brace down swiftly on the cat’s head, instantly putting it out of its misery. He then drove off home feeling somewhat guilty.
Some time after returning home there was a knock at his front door. A police officer was standing there and he didn’t look too pleased. "Is that your car sir?", said the officer pointing at my uncles car. "Yes, what’s the matter?”, asked my uncle, although he guessed the incident with the cat might be the reason for a visit from the local constabulary. "Sir, we've had a report that you were seen bludgeoning a cat to death by the side of a road”. My uncle was somewhat embarrassed and in an attemtpt to defend his actions repeated the day’s events to the police officer.
“May I take a look at your vehicle sir?” asked the officer. “Sure”, replied my uncle. So the pair of them went to his car and examined it for any damage. The police officer wondered around the vehicle with my uncle once again running through events & pointing out likely points of impact and so on. The officer took a good look at the cars tyres, at which point he turned to my uncle and asked, "Could you explain this please sir?”. My somewhat baffled uncle knelt down beside the police officer in order to get a better look at what he was referring to. Which turned out to be a rather dead cat caught in the wheel arch of his front wheel...............the other cat was just sun bathing.
It was a sunny weekend afternoon and my uncle was driving home from a game of golf through some country lanes. As he reached a small row of country houses a cat ran out in front of his car. He felt a small bump and looked in his rear view mirror, but the cat wasn't to be seen. So he pulled over in order to look for said cat.
At first my uncle couldn’t find the it. Then on the pavement he saw a cat lying very still. It’s breathing was shallow and it looked to him as though it was about to take it's last breath. Being a country type he was used to dispatching (killing) any animals that he thought were suffering. So he went to the trunk of his car and removed a wheel brace. He approached the cat, waited a second and then brought the brace down swiftly on the cat’s head, instantly putting it out of its misery. He then drove off home feeling somewhat guilty.
Some time after returning home there was a knock at his front door. A police officer was standing there and he didn’t look too pleased. "Is that your car sir?", said the officer pointing at my uncles car. "Yes, what’s the matter?”, asked my uncle, although he guessed the incident with the cat might be the reason for a visit from the local constabulary. "Sir, we've had a report that you were seen bludgeoning a cat to death by the side of a road”. My uncle was somewhat embarrassed and in an attemtpt to defend his actions repeated the day’s events to the police officer.
“May I take a look at your vehicle sir?” asked the officer. “Sure”, replied my uncle. So the pair of them went to his car and examined it for any damage. The police officer wondered around the vehicle with my uncle once again running through events & pointing out likely points of impact and so on. The officer took a good look at the cars tyres, at which point he turned to my uncle and asked, "Could you explain this please sir?”. My somewhat baffled uncle knelt down beside the police officer in order to get a better look at what he was referring to. Which turned out to be a rather dead cat caught in the wheel arch of his front wheel...............the other cat was just sun bathing.