Witty comebacks at BBQs...

[madbikeboy]

Had another one of those BBQ's last night - the sort where well meaning (but ultimately retarded) people try carefully to explain the error of my ways using the anecdotal evidence of why bikes are bad...

Two examples stood out last night, the first was the inevitable story of some distant friend/relative who bought a Harley, and even though he was a super driver, he ended up dead/in hospital after only a week...

The other was less generic - apparently some american rookie footballer got his 30 million signing cheque and bought himself a bike... And in learning to ride it in a carpark, the bike threw him off, he ruptured his ACL and almost lost his contract... Did I mention he was using a Hayabusa to learn to ride...?

So, instead of the normal sigh and quiet explanation that bikes are less safe than cars, and that with proper experience and tuition the risks are minimised, I tried a different approach...

The conversation went something like...
"Bikes are evil and they will destroy the universe..."
MBB - "Bikes have a built in fuckwit detector"
"What???"
MBB "Well, there's this idea called Darwins Law - a perfect example is your friend / relative who after never having graduated through a process of bikes, he went and queue jumped and bought a Harley"
"Huh???"
MBB "So, Darwins Law means that he ensured that he'd eat shit and die by being so stupid"
"Now, hang on a minute, it was the bike that killed him"
MBB - "No, it was his arrogance that killed him, and it seems that you're infected with the same lack of logic and commonsense that he had with your iillinformed and stupid sweeping statements..."

For some reason, he didn't seem to want to continue the discussion? I'm not sure, but maybe my people skills need work - :2thumbsup

[Grahameeboy]

I am sure that Katman can give you some tips....:lol:......but you are 101% correct.....

[Maha]

You said all that while you had a sausage in your mouth eh Mike??....:eek:

[Grahameeboy]

You said all that while you had a sausage in your mouth eh Mbb??....:eek:

mmmmm....I am not sure it was a sausage Marky....:baby: as he appears to have been talking to a Cock.....:shit:

[JATZ]

Nothing wrong with those people skills:niceone:

Quote "you want the truth................. you can't handle the truth" springs to mind

[racerhead]

Brilliant responce to such a narrow minded fool:niceone:

[Grahameeboy]

Harleys are dangerous!

Come to think of it, an Electra Glide would make a pretty good Mr Whippy truck.

Yeah but where would it keep the Cadbury flakes....

[Maha]

mmmmm....I am not sure it was a sausage Marky....:baby: as he appears to have been talking to a Cock.....:shit:

Indeed...what a puppet.....:eek:

Harleys are dangerous!

Come to think of it, an Electra Glide would make a pretty good Mr Whippy truck.

Think I will leave this alone......for now....:msn-wink:

[Grahameeboy]

Indeed...and whats more, he owned a Busa.....:eek:




Oh for Pete's sake.......:mellow:

[JMemonic]

Well said green bling for that one.

[ynot slow]

The dead give away that they know jack shit about riding,was comment about the relative buying a harley and was killed DRIVING it.:Punk:

[nico]

good comeback stupit fool spreading his negative ways 2owards us bikers ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh bet he felt about 1inch tall as well :jerry:

[naphazoline]

It cracks me up that people like this guy,don't hesitate to jump on a plane,and put thir lives in the hands of the flight crew,without so much as batting an eyelid.

Sure there's not as many plane crashes as there are motorbike accidents,but to say that planes kill,is about as ignorant statement,as the statement/s made by the guy at your BBQ.
Yet i've never heard anyone talk about planes in such a way.

[Pixie]

Had another one of those BBQ's last night - the sort where well meaning (but ultimately retarded) people try carefully to explain the error of my ways using the anecdotal evidence of why bikes are bad...

Two examples stood out last night, the first was the inevitable story of some distant friend/relative who bought a Harley, and even though he was a super driver, he ended up dead/in hospital after only a week...

The other was less generic - apparently some american rookie footballer got his 30 million signing cheque and bought himself a bike... And in learning to ride it in a carpark, the bike threw him off, he ruptured his ACL and almost lost his contract... Did I mention he was using a Hayabusa to learn to ride...?

So, instead of the normal sigh and quiet explanation that bikes are less safe than cars, and that with proper experience and tuition the risks are minimised, I tried a different approach...

The conversation went something like...
"Bikes are evil and they will destroy the universe..."
MBB - "Bikes have a built in fuckwit detector"
"What???"
MBB "Well, there's this idea called Darwins Law - a perfect example is your friend / relative who after never having graduated through a process of bikes, he went and queue jumped and bought a Harley"
"Huh???"
MBB "So, Darwins Law means that he ensured that he'd eat shit and die by being so stupid"
"Now, hang on a minute, it was the bike that killed him"
MBB - "No, it was his arrogance that killed him, and it seems that you're infected with the same lack of logic and commonsense that he had with your iillinformed and stupid sweeping statements..."

For some reason, he didn't seem to want to continue the discussion? I'm not sure, but maybe my people skills need work - :2thumbsup

Or you could do what I do and tell them to fuck themselves

[slofox]

Which is precisely why I bought the bike I did after a twenty year layoff. Middle weight so that I could pick it up (just...) when I fell off ...V twin to avoid spiky power band. Moderate capacity so that I could resist (mostly) the temptation to hoon it flat out on a public road. Was this a wise choice? Well I am still in one piece after 11,000km and one low speed drop to make me think again...The SV gives me plenty to think about still and I am well aware that I am still learning and always will be...so no, I am not about to go to a 'busa...

[MsKABC]

"You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to madbikeboy again"

:niceone:

My best friend (a biker chick who used to ride a zxr750) had a heated discussion with my F-I-L (rabidly anti-bikes) at our wedding that went along similar lines!

[Swoop]

I'm not sure, but maybe my people skills need work
They seem fine to me.:done:

[AllanB]

Well done.

An alternative is to state that the government would be better off banning knees as they are much more dangerous than motorcycles. When you get the 'huh?' you promptly knee him in the nuts and reply 'see, very dangerous...'

[pritch]

For some reason, he didn't seem to want to continue the discussion?

You definitely won that argument, but you might not get invited to many more barbecues... :whistle:

[FJRider]

You definitely won that argument, but you might not get invited to many more barbecues... :whistle:

You can seldom win with those type...

[Big Dave]

Harleys are dangerous!

Come to think of it, an Electra Glide would make a pretty good Mr Whippy truck.

I'd let the original comment slide at a BBQ - This one is the one I would have fun ripping to shreds.

Incredibly safety conscious.

[MadDuck]

Harleys are dangerous!

So are the maniacs that ride them :yes:


Yeah but where would it keep the Cadbury flakes....

That's what "Harley Davidson" authenticated leather saddle bags are for.

[madbikeboy]

You can seldom win with those type...

I think we both gained something from the experience, the list of BBQ's are getting shorter which means I gain more time wrenching on my bikes, and he gained some insight of my rudeness....

[madbikeboy]

"You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to madbikeboy again"

:niceone:

My best friend (a biker chick who used to ride a zxr750) had a heated discussion with my F-I-L (rabidly anti-bikes) at our wedding that went along similar lines!

Is it inevitable that guys don't like their future father in laws? What is it about screwing a guy's precious daughter that irritates father's so much??

[MsKABC]

Is it inevitable that guys don't like their future father in laws? What is it about screwing a guy's precious daughter that irritates father's so much??

Nah, my husband and my Dad get along just great. My husband's father and I on the other hand....:whistle:

ETA My Dad is actually pro-bikes :niceone:

[madbikeboy]

Nah, my husband and my Dad get along just great. My husband's father and I on the other hand....:whistle:

ETA My Dad is actually pro-bikes :niceone:

Is your husband open minded about you having two husbands? I think I'm unlikely to get permission from Papa for the current's hand in marriage... LOL! He hates me more than anyone... Ironically, I treat his daughter with immense respect and caring, but I won't drink with him...

[MsKABC]

Is your husband open minded about you having two husbands? I think I'm unlikely to get permission from Papa for the current's hand in marriage... LOL! He hates me more than anyone... Ironically, I treat his daughter with immense respect and caring, but I won't drink with him...

:rofl: He says if you pay half the mortgage, pay half the vet bills, do half the maintenance on my bike, mow half the lawns, take out half the garbage, hang half the washing....are you getting the picture? ;)

[Blackshear]

Apparently I must spread some bling around or sommat.
Cheers for the now-archived quote MBB!

[Creeping Death]

Did I mention he was using a Hayabusa to learn to ride...?

Waaaaahahahaha!Funny as!!!He da MAN!:clap:

[GSXR Trace]

man i hate that conversation... might have to remember that one, especially when everyone gets shocked and surprised that i ride (if they dont know me) and then joins in and it seems that they think its even more dangerous just because im a woman!

Thanks for the laugh and the witty idea!

[Horse]

Come to think of it, an Electra Glide would make a pretty good Mr Whippy truck.

This is a complete exaggeration! When I'm coming back from the supermarket I can barely fit 6 full bags of groceries in mine!

[Lucy]

... Did I mention he was using a Hayabusa to learn to ride...?




Well the 'Busa gave him the learn all right.

:doh:

[madbikeboy]

man i hate that conversation... might have to remember that one, especially when everyone gets shocked and surprised that i ride (if they dont know me) and then joins in and it seems that they think its even more dangerous just because im a woman!

Thanks for the laugh and the witty idea!

When are you back in Auckland?

[scumdog]

Or you could do what I do and tell them to fuck themselves

Or just nod your head and agree with them saying 'right' 'true-true' and 'dead right' kinda stuff...kinda flattens the 'argument' and leaves them puzzled.

[sidecar bob]

If you want to cop some major condesending crap about the dangers of how you live your life when youre at a barbeque, tell them you passengerd two sidecars around the Cemetary Circiut last week.
And as they berate you for being a brainless moron, fill up on piss & prepare to drive home i think, Really . . .Who is the fuckwit here.

[Littleman]

Gotta love those middle class dinner parties.

Everythings just so sanitised and boring, god....

I generally end up drunk and making a number of inappropriate comments.

Eventually I'm asked to leave when I get caught trying to steal their cutlery.

[Okey Dokey]

Excellent response to a typically dopey comment from a non-rider. Please accept some bling.

[Tank]

I never have people telling me that Im crazy or that Im going to kill myself.

The closest is was my Mum (who's brother was killed on a bike) - who told be "Just be careful on that thing for Gods sake).

Even my employer from the US loves the idea and one other exec has started riding since I have.

In the close I live in (6 homes), three now have bikes (and of 3 of those homes two have 2 bikes), and the fourth is looking at getting his license to join us on roads.

The joys of working and socializing with rational and open minded people.

[Grahameeboy]

I never have people telling me that Im crazy or that Im going to kill myself.

The closest is was my Mum (who's brother was killed on a bike) - who told be "Just be careful on that thing for Gods sake).

Even my employer from the US loves the idea and one other exec has started riding since I have.

In the close I live in (6 homes), three now have bikes (and of 3 of those homes two have 2 bikes), and the fourth is looking at getting his license to join us on roads.

The joys of working and socializing with rational and open minded people.

Me neither...they all think it's cool to ride a bike...

[gixxer-king]

GOD i can bearly hold myself together here. i must hear some more ideas for responses. In all honesty I dont have TOO much of a problem. yes I ride a busa and I have come off once. for all the rest of my time i havent even come close to arseing off because i know my limits. people used to go "oh those things are dangerous blah blah blah" and i'd say well i havent come off. to which they reply"yea but your not on one of those powerful things" then after walking them outside and explaining well this is the fastest production bike you can get for under thirty gees and no I havent come off it and yes i do own one of those big ones they are usually back in their seat onto the next mindless explaination of something else that is dangerous.
then they drive out the driveway with no lights on.... go figure?

[GSXR Trace]

When are you back in Auckland?

rode back up today... been home about an hour

let me know if ya wanna go for a ride at some stage!

[FJRider]

Or just nod your head and agree with them saying 'right' 'true-true' and 'dead right' kinda stuff...kinda flattens the 'argument' and leaves them puzzled.

But how can you win an arguement if ya dont argue... ???:dodge:

[ynot slow]

But how can you win an arguement if ya dont argue... ???:dodge:

Must be a woman thing right?Remember they are always right so no need to argue.:nono:

[XP@]

Same sh1t different vehicle:

Many years ago I used to work in the motor insurance game.
A young, guy comes in wanting quotes for his first car. Something like Renault 5GT Turbo or Peugot 205 1.9GTI, all nearly new and costing a few quid. The insurance came back in the 1000's pounds for the year, and that was just third party fire and theft. I suggested the usual "get a smaller car, not only will the insurance be less than the cost of the car but you may survive to drive it." He went away to think about it.

Friday, closing time, I got a very crackly cell phone call from the same guy asking me to put him on cover. I started to take the details but could not understand him (bad line and english was not his first language). I tried to tell him "You are not covered do not drive it".

Saturday morning I was not working, The brokers had a visit from the insurance companies inspector. He sees the half completed cover note and cancels it.

Saturday evening a Renault 5 GT Turbo has a massive accident on a straight road and a power pole. The driver will never drive again and was not insured.

[McDuck]

Same sh1t different vehicle:

Many years ago I used to work in the motor insurance game.
A young, guy comes in wanting quotes for his first car. Something like Renault 5GT Turbo or Peugot 205 1.9GTI, all nearly new and costing a few quid. The insurance came back in the 1000's pounds for the year, and that was just third party fire and theft. I suggested the usual "get a smaller car, not only will the insurance be less than the cost of the car but you may survive to drive it." He went away to think about it.

Friday, closing time, I got a very crackly cell phone call from the same guy asking me to put him on cover. I started to take the details but could not understand him (bad line and english was not his first language). I tried to tell him "You are not covered do not drive it".

Saturday morning I was not working, The brokers had a visit from the insurance companies inspector. He sees the half completed cover note and cancels it.

Saturday evening a Renault 5 GT Turbo has a massive accident on a straight road and a power pole. The driver will never drive again and was not insured.

owned <gfxgfc>

[Insanity_rules]

Had another one of those BBQ's last night - the sort where well meaning (but ultimately retarded) people try carefully to explain the error of my ways using the anecdotal evidence of why bikes are bad...

Two examples stood out last night, the first was the inevitable story of some distant friend/relative who bought a Harley, and even though he was a super driver, he ended up dead/in hospital after only a week...

The other was less generic - apparently some american rookie footballer got his 30 million signing cheque and bought himself a bike... And in learning to ride it in a carpark, the bike threw him off, he ruptured his ACL and almost lost his contract... Did I mention he was using a Hayabusa to learn to ride...?

So, instead of the normal sigh and quiet explanation that bikes are less safe than cars, and that with proper experience and tuition the risks are minimised, I tried a different approach...

The conversation went something like...
"Bikes are evil and they will destroy the universe..."
MBB - "Bikes have a built in fuckwit detector"
"What???"
MBB "Well, there's this idea called Darwins Law - a perfect example is your friend / relative who after never having graduated through a process of bikes, he went and queue jumped and bought a Harley"
"Huh???"
MBB "So, Darwins Law means that he ensured that he'd eat shit and die by being so stupid"
"Now, hang on a minute, it was the bike that killed him"
MBB - "No, it was his arrogance that killed him, and it seems that you're infected with the same lack of logic and commonsense that he had with your iillinformed and stupid sweeping statements..."

For some reason, he didn't seem to want to continue the discussion? I'm not sure, but maybe my people skills need work - :2thumbsup

Oh yeah boy, that was a brilliant comeback. Did you really say that? I love serving it to these suposed intellectuals who think they can talk me out of my passion or try to make me look stupid by coming out with some tired story about a relative or friend.

Can I use your analogy (with credit given to the original author of course)?

I love to point out that a good dose of motorcycle accidents are caused by f@ckwits like whom ever just piped up driving a car with their brains in the glovebox and another significant number are riders who don't know their limits.

[thepom]

I,ve had 2 bad accidents in 4 years both not my fault but boy do I get some shit for riding bikes!:argh:

[madbikeboy]

Oh yeah boy, that was a brilliant comeback. Did you really say that? I love serving it to these suposed intellectuals who think they can talk me out of my passion or try to make me look stupid by coming out with some tired story about a relative or friend.

Can I use your analogy (with credit given to the original author of course)?

I love to point out that a good dose of motorcycle accidents are caused by f@ckwits like whom ever just piped up driving a car with their brains in the glovebox and another significant number are riders who don't know their limits.

Yes, I really said it...

Was sitting on the beach with MadBikeBabe's mommy yesterday, her sister etc - and mommy starting telling me that I have a "stupid" sense of humour, and that I needed to stop being sarcastic and making stuff up. An example of this was a great-aunt who, despite meeting me about 15 times in the last 3 years, still asks (and you have to imagine the posh accent) "Oh, have we meet?". She asks this each time. So a week before xmas at a "function" I replied, no maam, I'm the hired help. To which she replied, "fetch me a sherry then".

Same old biddy at the xmas "function" being held at some posh house with a big assed pool - again, posh accent - "Oh, have we met?". To which I replied, "no Maam, I'm the pool guy, I came to clean your pool but asked to stay, which I though was really kind of you".

So, old biddy Aunt complains to MadBikeBabe's mommy about my "horrid lying", for which I get a lecture. I mean, honestly, does blue blood mean you can't have a sense of fucking humour? :baby:

[GSXR Trace]

Just this morning i had an old bugger try to tell me my bike was too big for me and that they were bloody dangerous machines... I gave a short and annoyed answer of only if you are an idiot and i had my helmet on and so jumped on my bike and rode off (faster than usual just to mess with him! haha)

I cannot believe how many times guys see me gearing up to get on my bike and ask if its mine.. and then comment that it is a big bike for a girl! They just make me mad!

[madbikeboy]

I think it's the coolest thing, a chick riding.

[MsKABC]

I cannot believe how many times guys see me gearing up to get on my bike and ask if its mine.. and then comment that it is a big bike for a girl! They just make me mad!

Those are the blokes to stay away from. You need one who is secure enough in his own masculinity not to be threatened by a chick on a bike. Assuming you don't already have one of those ;)

[GSXR Trace]

I think it's the coolest thing, a chick riding.


Those are the blokes to stay away from. You need one who is secure enough in his own masculinity not to be threatened by a chick on a bike. Assuming you don't already have one of those ;)

yes well it is clear that i have to find myself a guy who rides... as the last one was rather against me riding... although was happy that I snowboard... but still there are multiple reasons why he is now classified as the "ex"

But seriously, since i got the gixer, on average i get about 3 comments a week from guys who think my bike is too big for me! at first i found it laughable as clearly they have an image of my bike being for guys, and I thought that was awesome, but the condensending comments that have been made since make we want to get off my bike and hit them!

[MsKABC]

But seriously, since i got the gixer, on average i get about 3 comments a week from guys who think my bike is too big for me! at first i found it laughable as clearly they have an image of my bike being for guys, and I thought that was awesome, but the condensending comments that have been made since make we want to get off my bike and hit them!

It's probably just too big for THEM! (Is da poor widdle boy afwaid of da big scawy motosickle? Diddums!) You are clearly hanging out in all the wrong places! My best friend used to ride a zxr750 and I don't think she ever got negative comments. Blokes were always impressed! Take a deep breath, climb on your bike & give it a big handful of throttle as you ride away ;)

[Blossom]

Yep the domestic BBQ is certainly full of middle class idiots. My personal favorite come back to the inevitable statement of how dangerous bikes are and how could I be so irresponsible and potentially leave my children without a mother is... "yes I know they are dangerous. I have already lost a brother who was riding a motorbike, nearly crippled another brother, so statistically the odds are I should be fine."
Thens theres the ever popular "True, but thank goodness they are not as dangerous as cars, Seems like every day on the news there is are stories about fatal car crashes. So how do you get around?"
:bleh:yeah I know I am a sarcastic wench... its part of my charm.

[sugilite]

If you want to cop some major condesending crap about the dangers of how you live your life when youre at a barbeque, tell them you passengerd two sidecars around the Cemetary Circiut last week.
And as they berate you for being a brainless moron, fill up on piss & prepare to drive home i think, Really . . .Who is the fuckwit here.

Some of my customers say they cannot imagine me riding a motorcycle yet alone racing one. They freaked when I told them about the cemetery circuit. "But why?" they said... I told them the flaggies had a coffin at every corner and it cut out the middle man :lol:

[Cheshire Cat]

Definitly doing that next time! :laugh: espcially since most of the negitive comments and cheeky remarks i get are from my bf and his mates lol




Well done.

An alternative is to state that the government would be better off banning knees as they are much more dangerous than motorcycles. When you get the 'huh?' you promptly knee him in the nuts and reply 'see, very dangerous...'

[GSXR Trace]

Yes, I really said it...

Was sitting on the beach with MadBikeBabe's mommy yesterday, her sister etc - and mommy starting telling me that I have a "stupid" sense of humour, and that I needed to stop being sarcastic and making stuff up. An example of this was a great-aunt who, despite meeting me about 15 times in the last 3 years, still asks (and you have to imagine the posh accent) "Oh, have we meet?". She asks this each time. So a week before xmas at a "function" I replied, no maam, I'm the hired help. To which she replied, "fetch me a sherry then".

Same old biddy at the xmas "function" being held at some posh house with a big assed pool - again, posh accent - "Oh, have we met?". To which I replied, "no Maam, I'm the pool guy, I came to clean your pool but asked to stay, which I though was really kind of you".

So, old biddy Aunt complains to MadBikeBabe's mommy about my "horrid lying", for which I get a lecture. I mean, honestly, does blue blood mean you can't have a sense of fucking humour? :baby:

man, i hope your lady rides, or I feel she is gonna have some trouble if her family keeps giving you shit about riding!

[Pussy]

yes well it is clear that i have to find myself a guy who rides... as the last one was rather against me riding... although was happy that I snowboard... but still there are multiple reasons why he is now classified as the "ex"

But seriously, since i got the gixer, on average i get about 3 comments a week from guys who think my bike is too big for me! at first i found it laughable as clearly they have an image of my bike being for guys, and I thought that was awesome, but the condensending comments that have been made since make we want to get off my bike and hit them!

And you've been a meatbomb too, Trace! You irresponsible thing.... :D

[madbikeboy]

man, i hope your lady rides, or I feel she is gonna have some trouble if her family keeps giving you shit about riding!

Umm. Hmm. She really doesn't like the bike, and her eyes glaze over when I talk about it. Them? Especially Scoot.

Meatbomb? I didn't know you were dumb enough to jump? :)

[GSXR Trace]

And you've been a meatbomb too, Trace! You irresponsible thing.... :D


Umm. Hmm. She really doesn't like the bike, and her eyes glaze over when I talk about it. Them? Especially Scoot.

Meatbomb? I didn't know you were dumb enough to jump? :)

uh oh... she better start liking it soon!

And yes, i have a need for speed.. and jumping out of a plane and plumeting towards the ground sounded like fun! and hell it was! can't see how it was dumb... do explain

[Insanity_rules]

It's probably just too big for THEM! (Is da poor widdle boy afwaid of da big scawy motosickle? Diddums!) You are clearly hanging out in all the wrong places! My best friend used to ride a zxr750 and I don't think she ever got negative comments. Blokes were always impressed! Take a deep breath, climb on your bike & give it a big handful of throttle as you ride away ;)

:clap: Classic, I'm about to start teaching my wife to ride. Can't wait till she's on the road. Her boss who's a real condiscending a-hole rides a 125 scooter. Imagine how funny it'll be when she can turn up at work on a real bike.

She's going to inherit the vtz of doom which for a 2 fiddy is no slouch. Even cooler shes already got a dream bike to aim for, she's started drooling over thou ninja's (Oh well its not a Honda but if we liked the same brand it would be boring).

[quickbuck]

...... she's started drooling over thou ninja's (Oh well its not a Honda but if we liked the same brand it would be boring).

Yeah, what's with that... mine is drooling over Kwakas too...

[Insanity_rules]

Yeah, what's with that... mine is drooling over Kwakas too...

Gotta admit, I'm a Honda devotee (My last 4 bikes and 13 of the 20 I've ever owned)but those new Kwakas are sexy bikes.

[Slyer]

She's a keeper indeed.

[quickbuck]

Gotta admit, I'm a Honda devotee (My last 4 bikes and 13 of the 20 I've ever owned)but those new Kwakas are sexy bikes.

Yeah... but I don't like green.... Kawasakis in blue look good to me, but that is like saying the best colour for a Honda is Yellow....
Sorry, I'm a fan for traditional manufacturers colours.... And NO Kawasakis do not look good in red either.
Only Hondas should be red.... Oh and a smattering of Italian machinery.

The Previous bike to this one was a Suzuki, but before that it was only ever Hondas for me (about 5 in total)..... I got another one, as I should have never bought a 98 Katana even though it was 3 years old at the time...

[Swoop]

...a great-aunt who, despite meeting me about 15 times in the last 3 years, still asks (and you have to imagine the posh accent) "Oh, have we meet?".
You obviously haven't made a good enough impression to be remembered... Perhaps vomiting on the ottoman rug or taking a dump in the punchbowl would do the trick?:Punk:

yes... but still there are multiple reasons why he is now classified as the "ex"
You killed him???:shit:

And you've been a meatbomb too, Trace! You irresponsible thing.... :D
Damn incorrigible, really.<_<

[Slyer]

Yeah... but I don't like green.... Kawasakis in blue look good to me, but that is like saying the best colour for a Honda is Yellow....
Sorry, I'm a fan for traditional manufacturers colours.... And NO Kawasakis do not look good in red either.
Only Hondas should be red.... Oh and a smattering of Italian machinery.

The Previous bike to this one was a Suzuki, but before that it was only ever Hondas for me (about 5 in total)..... I got another one, as I should have never bought a 98 Katana even though it was 3 years old at the time...
I luuuurve the blue Kawasakis.
EG: http://www.kawasaki.co.uk/ER-6f

[Ixion]

Yes, I really said it...

Was sitting on the beach with MadBikeBabe's mommy yesterday, her sister etc - and mommy starting telling me that I have a "stupid" sense of humour, and that I needed to stop being sarcastic and making stuff up. An example of this was a great-aunt who, despite meeting me about 15 times in the last 3 years, still asks (and you have to imagine the posh accent) "Oh, have we meet?". She asks this each time. So a week before xmas at a "function" I replied, no maam, I'm the hired help. To which she replied, "fetch me a sherry then".

Same old biddy at the xmas "function" being held at some posh house with a big assed pool - again, posh accent - "Oh, have we met?". To which I replied, "no Maam, I'm the pool guy, I came to clean your pool but asked to stay, which I though was really kind of you".

So, old biddy Aunt complains to MadBikeBabe's mommy about my "horrid lying", for which I get a lecture. I mean, honestly, does blue blood mean you can't have a sense of fucking humour? :baby:

"No Ma'am, we haven't. But I think you have met my brother. We're quite different, he's rather wild and more than a little unstable. Rides one of those dreadful motorcycles, and, just between you and I, you probably would be best not to be around him too much. He's just sex mad "

Next time

"No Sexy, we haven't . But I'm sure we will, I like older women. You have met my brother though, looks just like me but as boring as hell. Say,why don't we slip off somewhere we can be alone, eh, I know chicks like you, I'll bet you like a bit of rough, eh"

She'll never come near you again.

[GSXR Trace]

Damn incorrigible, really.<_<

who the hell is wanting to change and reform me??? who do you think you are :bleh: I thought i was perfect just the way i am :crybaby:.... hahaha that would make a good tui ad

[McDuck]

who the hell is wanting to change and reform me??? who do you think you are :bleh: I thought i was perfect just the way i am :crybaby:.... hahaha that would make a good tui ad

get a tho...

[Lord Derosso]

I am so SICK of hearing that from work people whom have never sat on a bike let alone come to realise why people come to be bike fanatics. First day back in the office this morning and it was the ' did you know you have 18 times more risk of dying in a bike accident than in a car etc?'. I thought about it and considering I bus to work every day my reply was this:

'Since I travel 180 times more in cars, taxis, buses and on donkeys than on my bike, I therefore actually have ten times more chances dying off my bike than on it.'

It has taken six months but that shut the office cows up big time. They had no answer to that one. Statistics are a waste of time. Some of us have ridden for 40+ years so how do we equate to the formula then? And I have lost people I grew up with as kids due to silly mistakes and simple bad luck since I started riding all those years ago. I have often thought that riders need certain skills and luck to gain the necessary experience to give yourself that extra survival ability, or edge, that extra splitsecond in making the right choice and not freezing as you realise you have taken the corner too fast or whatever.

The development of good brakes and handling over the decades has not really contributed to this 'survival' factor. Its so so easy to made one mistake, hence what they use to call the 'forgivest' ability of the older models. It used to be included in bike tests once.

[madbikeboy]

uh oh... she better start liking it soon!

And yes, i have a need for speed.. and jumping out of a plane and plumeting towards the ground sounded like fun! and hell it was! can't see how it was dumb... do explain

Only soldiers and people dumb enough volunteer... I like sky diving, but it's not all that thrilling for me. I get more of a buzz riding on the track. The freefall is kind of neat, but you don't get the sensation of speed - and once the chute opens, it's just a gentle drift to the ground...

[GSXR Trace]

Only soldiers and people dumb enough volunteer... I like sky diving, but it's not all that thrilling for me. I get more of a buzz riding on the track. The freefall is kind of neat, but you don't get the sensation of speed - and once the chute opens, it's just a gentle drift to the ground...

hahaha... nice. well i enjoyed the freefall! ANd cannot compare it to the buzz of riding on the track as haven't done that, so i will have to take your word for that one!

I always try to do something to mark my birthday, since every year since being at uni it is in exams, so this year it came 6 months late, but i marked it by jumping out of a plane! sue me! :girlfight: :dodge:

[wysper]

"No Sexy, we haven't . But I'm sure we will, I like older women. You have met my brother though, looks just like me but as boring as hell. Say,why don't we slip off somewhere we can be alone, eh, I know chicks like you, I'll bet you like a bit of rough, eh"

She'll never come near you again.

Could be a bit awkward if she says "That sounds devine, shall we go?"

[devnull]

Only soldiers and people dumb enough volunteer... I like sky diving, but it's not all that thrilling for me. I get more of a buzz riding on the track. The freefall is kind of neat, but you don't get the sensation of speed - and once the chute opens, it's just a gentle drift to the ground...

Bleh! That's what CRW is for - fills in the bit between opening and impact :laugh:

[Qkkid]

You said all that while you had a sausage in your mouth eh Mike??....:eek:

That is a very unappropiate comment Mark are you saying he is gay:lol:

[Mikkel]

Where do you guys dig up these fossils? I've never had anyone express that sort of sentiment whenever the subject of motorcycling has been breached...

...which is a bit sad because it would appear you can have a lot of fun with such people.

[Ronin]

You definitely won that argument, but you might not get invited to many more barbecues... :whistle:
That would be a win/win situation then

[bogan]

I usually just go with the "well you are thousands of times more likely to die from old age, so why not have some fun first", but the fuckwit detector is a far better option

[SPman]

Sure there's not as many plane crashes as there are motorbike accidents,but to say that planes kill,is about as ignorant statement,as the statement/s made by the guy at your BBQ.
Yet i've never heard anyone talk about planes in such a way. But....roads kill! We hear it all the time...not that the driver was incompetent...the road leapt up and killed him........

[Qkkid]

But....roads kill! We hear it all the time...not that the driver was incompetent...the road leapt up and killed him........

:whistle:I know roads kill Gixxers ;)

[shrub]

"OK, thanks for telling me that, I was planning to ride as badly as I could because it never dawned on me to ride carefully". Then there is the lovely "It's not you, it's the other people on the road".

Thanks for that, how about you do something practical towards my safety and stay at home or leave your car in the shed.

[SPman]

:whistle:I know roads kill Gixxers ;) Nah....not paying attention kills Gixxers..........

[Thaeos]

Never had anyone make any kind of comment like that to me ... yet??

[Spearfish]

then you have the ones who tell you how to survive a crash..
."I would jump off just as was going to hit the car"
oh yeah?
"yeah, then I would............and land on my feet."
really?
"Yeah it would be kewl, then I would punch the wanker into next week"
yeah?..sure you will
"Fuck Yeah"
Fuck off!! you cant even ride a bike Mum .

[Swoop]

:whistle:I know roads kill Gixxers ;)
More like "corners"...

[SixPackBack]

Nah....not paying attention kills Gixxers..........
Some live for ever:cool:

[shrub]

Some live for ever:cool:

Very, very few. Most get broken or fall to pieces.

[shafty]

It pisses me off too, when people start harking on about how 'dangerous Bikes are".

Why not quote Burt Munro himself;

"You can live more in 10 minutes on a bike than most people do in their lifetimes" - then peel off.

[Skyryder]

The dead give away that they know jack shit about riding,was comment about the relative buying a harley and was killed DRIVING it.:Punk:


I 'drive' my bike. I ride a horse. Engines are driven animals are ridden. Not many think my way.........................but some do.


Skyryder

[peasea]

Not many think my way.........................but some do.


Skyryder

I know exactly how that feels.

[R-Soul]

MBB - "Bikes have a built in fuckwit detector"
"What???"


BWHAHAHAHHA!! Loving it!! :yes:

[marty]

here's the BEST comeback >> http://imgur.com/mCUfG.jpg

[schrodingers cat]

Sounds like you forgot to take the 'Wanker Magnet' out of your pocket before you went and had it set to 11. Sure worked a treat huh?

PS - Like the Darwin call. Throttle works in two directions

[MarkH]

For some reason, he didn't seem to want to continue the discussion? I'm not sure, but maybe my people skills need work - :2thumbsup

From what you posted they seem fine. Maybe you are a bit down on arse kissing skills, but who the fuck needs them!

I've had people say they couldn't be riding a motorcycle, I just agree - motorcycle riding isn't for everyone. I've had people say it is dangerous, I say it sure is - I gotta be careful when riding. The fact is that at 42 years old I have never broken a single bone in my body, but I know someone that got 2 broken legs from crossing the road - maybe there isn't such a certainty of death from riding despite what some may think.

[MarkH]

I cannot believe how many times guys see me gearing up to get on my bike and ask if its mine.. and then comment that it is a big bike for a girl! They just make me mad!

You should tell them that it is indeed yours and it is a great fuckwit detection device! If someone sees it and makes a retarded comment then you straight away know you are listening to a fuckwit!

So when are you going to get a GSXR-1300 like your mum?