Favourite blonde joke to date

[firefighter]

I urgently needed a few days off work, but I knew the Boss would not allow me to take a leave. I thought that maybe if I acted "CRAZY" then he would tell me to take a few days off. So I hung upside down from the ceiling and made funny noises.

My co-worker (who's blonde) asked me what I was doing. I told her that I was pretending to be a light bulb so that the Boss would think I was "CRAZY" and give me a few days off.

A few minutes later the Boss came into the office and asked "What are you doing?" I told him I was a light bulb. He said "You are clearly stressed out. Go home and recuperate for a couple of days." I jumped down and walked out of the office.

When my co-worker (the blonde) followed me, the Boss said to her, "And where do you think you're going?"

She said, "well I'm going home too, surely you can't expect me to work in the dark!"

[Fatt Max]

Not a blond joke as such but a friend of mine, who is blond, came over here a few years ago on holidays and stayed with us.

To say she is scatty is an understatement. Three quality blond moments were:

1. Asking where to plug the hair dryer in, trouble is we were staying in a tent at Hot Water Beach

2. Watching her queue up at the ferry building to buy her South Island Dollars

3. Convincing her that a Tui (the bird, not the beer) has a deadly bite and the only way to keep them away from you is to wave your hands in the air and blow raspberries at them. Watching her do that in Cornwall Park one Saturday afternoon was priceless.

Always keen to hear good jokes though…

[AlBundy]

What do you put behind a blondes ears to make her more attractive?












Her ankles!

[Mr Merde]

They start again.

Go for it.


My 2 cents


"Why do blondes drive BMW's?

Cos they can spell it"

[Fatt Max]

How do you get four blondes on a bar stool...?

Turn it upside down..

[MIXONE]

What does a blonde say after sex?
"Do you all play for the same team?"

[Qkchk]

While camping at Russell over the holidays, our neighbours had a friend of one of their daughters come up to stay a couple of nights. We were warned that she 'was a blonde' and this was confirmed after she was overheard asking "Its that your mailbox"? She was refering to the powerbox that powered tent sites have.

[Fatt Max]

While camping at Russell over the holidays, our neighbours had a friend of one of their daughters come up to stay a couple of nights. We were warned that she 'was a blonde' and this was confirmed after she was overheard asking "Its that your mailbox"? She was refering to the powerbox that powered tent sites have.

Jeez, that sounds familiar mate.....nice one

[sosman]

Whats the difference between a blond & a Washing Machine?









A Washing Machine don't follow u around once ya dump yr load in it :gob:

[Fatt Max]

Whats the difference between a blond and a freezer?

A freezer dont fart when you take the meat out...

[Fatt Max]

How do you know when a blond has an orgasm?

She drops her kebab....

[98tls]

What do you call a blonde with a runny nose? Full.Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?when you smack the mosi it stops sucking.