Top 100 ugliest motocycles in history [Archive]

Tank

27th January 2009, 13:54

EJK

27th January 2009, 14:00

Get me a bourbon. They are all bullshit IMHO.

Mikkel

27th January 2009, 14:00

Grab a bourbon and discuss.

Here? At work? :shifty:

Will browse the list now... I might need a drink afterwards. :mad:

Big Dave

27th January 2009, 14:02

>>V-Strom didnt even make the list.>>

Thus it has ZERO credibility.

I like Dali. She likes Picasso. Neither of us is wrong.

idb

27th January 2009, 14:04

....

umm and the typo in the title was on purpose. honest.

Ah yes...I get it...very clever...

Maha

27th January 2009, 14:05

>>V-Strom didnt even make the list.>>

Thus it has ZERO credibility.

I like Dali. She likes Picasso. Neither of us is wrong.

Two men say they're Jesus, one of them must be wrong!

Gremlin

27th January 2009, 14:06

I was laughing most of the way through the pages I selected to see... Ducati Hypermotard, Multistrada, Triumphs, Buells etc.

Then I look at the sportsbike page, the RC8 is the worst? :spanking: Come on, its the most beautiful of the lot!! He obviously shit his pants and got scared when he saw it.

My bike isn't on the list... so its fine. Its smaller brother is, being described as the result of mating with an anteater, but we all knew that :laugh:

Katman

27th January 2009, 14:07

I think I'd best steer clear of the Bourbon while this threads remains on page 1.

Yes, there's some fuglies in there - but the Katana????????

The guy clearly doesn't know his arse from his elbow.

Rosie

27th January 2009, 14:15

They have a much broader definition of 'motard' than I do.
The KLR650 is ugly, but it isn't a motard :oi-grr:

MsKABC

27th January 2009, 14:19

I looked at the nakeds, sprots & golden age & pretty much agreed with all except for the blade and the sv.

There were some hit-repeatedly-with-the-ugly-stick bikes there!

Mikkel

27th January 2009, 14:21

Looking at the list it just appears that the guy doesn't like motorcycles, period.

He makes it sound like it's a bad thing to use your motard to jump sidewalks and run over pedestrians. Let's be serious here, that's called a design brief as far as I am concerned.

Oscar

27th January 2009, 14:26

Beauty is an opinion.
Personally I like half the bikes on that list.
In particular, I always wanted a CB400F, and the Ducati Hypermotard is a damn fine looking bike.

Don't like bourbon though, might need a malt.

The Pastor

27th January 2009, 14:34

I DONT THINK THERE IS 100 UGLY BIKES EVER MADE.

fROM THAT WEBSITE I SAW ABOUT 5 BIKES THAT WERE ACTUALLY UGLY.

Maha

27th January 2009, 14:34

Some do warrant their position on each of the lists...:yes:
Tourers....FJR and the Kawasaki should not be on the list.
Nakeds....The Shiver/Brutale and Bimota should not be on the list.
Sportsbikes....The SV/Blade and Street Triple should not be on the list, that particular ZX14 is ugly, but only in white and with those graphics, I like the ZX14, it shouldn't be there IMO.

Oscar

27th January 2009, 14:37

Some do warrant their position on each of the lists...:yes:

The RC8?
The ugliest sprots bike?
Please...

imdying

27th January 2009, 14:44

Awww man, my poor SV dropped down to number 9 in sportsbikes this year :angry:

This fella seems to have some pretty single minded views on what he likes and doesn't like though.... doesn't seem like it'd be much fun being him :S

Maha

27th January 2009, 14:46

The RC8?
The ugliest sprots bike?
Please...

Yeah I would agree in part, very.....'transformer' looking.

rok-the-boat

27th January 2009, 16:10

Whoever made that list is ugly stupid.

James Deuce

27th January 2009, 16:42

Dude doesn't know the difference between an airbox cover and a fuel tank.

I think this list is right up there with the Dog & Lemon guide.

There were maybe 6 out and out ugly bikes in that list. The rest were merely an expression of styling preference and bigoted opinion. I reckon this dude will be 55ish and bike styling stopped for him when Craig Vetter sold the Wind Jammer fairing for the first time.

The Honda CBX1000 is not an attractive bike to me, but a Suzuki GS1000S is. Just because it has 6 cylinders, the CBX isn't elevated magically into good-looking-land.

Dissing Yamaha? The structural elements that go into Yamaha's top end bikes can capture an entire evening of just looking for me. Vacuum die-cast parts, hidden cabling, crinkle finish paint, and washers that have no sharp edges scream quality values and thought at every stage of the design phase.

Oh well.

Zoolander

27th January 2009, 16:44

Yeah I would agree in part, very.....'transformer' looking.

Kinda transformer meets a brick. Shes one uuuggglllyyy muthafucker. (sure its still a kickarse bike though!)

chester

27th January 2009, 16:52

5) Triumph Street Triple - Decked out in green bodywork to resemble Shrek's Snot Rag, this misbegotten bucket of bolts does absolutely everything wrong in what passes for its styling. The double bug eyed headlight squats under a big plopped pile of ogre mucus, the fuel tank seems to have been pushed back until it's vertical, the side covers are really the fender or are they really the seat base, the headers are a convoluted mess, and it just goes to prove that Triumph's last decent bike was the Bonneville.

WTF I bet he has a lada .........:angry2:

Gubb

27th January 2009, 17:49

S3, Striple, and the Rocket III all made the list.

This guy has a credibility issue.

Tank

27th January 2009, 18:19

S3, Striple, and the Rocket III all made the list.

This guy has a credibility issue.

Man - you are such a Triumph whore ... :woohoo: Hows the new bike goin'?

Gubb

27th January 2009, 18:25

Man - you are such a Triumph whore ... :woohoo: Hows the new bike goin'?

Haha. I am now.

Loving it to bits. It's nice that the "floor oil storage system" has now been fixed as well, although some would argue that it's not a Triumph without a leak.

Bonez

27th January 2009, 18:32

Laughed so hard I almost pissed myself.

breakaway

27th January 2009, 18:36

KTM RC8 considered ugly? This muppet has no idea what he's talking about.

vifferman

27th January 2009, 18:40

Grab a bourbon and discuss.
Discuss yourself!
This is KB, not skool.

umm and the typo in the title was on purpose. honest.
To which typo are you referring?

Swampdonkey

27th January 2009, 18:49

Bad list....bad bad bad

Mon ami mate

27th January 2009, 18:50

Do bike riders look as much like their bikes as much as dog owners look like their dogs ?
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder or is that beer holder ?
whatever gets you thru the night ..........'s alright .

Bonez

27th January 2009, 18:54

No, I was wrong. I did piss myself after reading the reactions lol.

riffer

27th January 2009, 18:55

I thought there were some beautiful bikes in those lists.

and a few dodgy ones too.

But where was the RF900? LOL.

Bonez

27th January 2009, 18:56

I thought there were some beautiful bikes in those lists.

and a few dodgy ones too.

But where was the RF900? LOL.Never saw the standard CX 500 listed either:Police: Was the Munch Mommath listed? Visions a bit blurred lol.

riffer

27th January 2009, 18:57

Never saw the CX listed either:Police:

Yeah - 'twas.

The CX650 turbo.

Tank

27th January 2009, 19:00

Discuss yourself!
This is KB, not skool.

Discuss myself ?

Well - I'm 6'2 love walks on the beach, sunsets, and fine wines. My favorite movie is the sound of music - and if I had to be fucked senseless by a pop star - I'd choose Pink.

To which typo are you referring?

The spllin mistooks.

Big Dave

27th January 2009, 19:14

I'd choose Pink.

Wouldn't make my long list.

rocketman1

27th January 2009, 19:20

There is at least half a dozen bikes here I would put on the best looking bike list
This guy's a nutter
Probably owns moped, is 57 years old and lives with his mum.

Mental Trousers

27th January 2009, 19:21

Opinions are alike arseholes - usually full of shit.

Quite a few of those choices seem like they were there just to wind people up.

Bonez

27th January 2009, 19:22

Opinions are alike arseholes - usually full of shit.

Quite a few of those choices seem like they were there just to wind people up.You're on to it.

Hitcher

27th January 2009, 19:22

In the eye of this beholder, these puppies are decidedly unpretty...

http://www.motorcycledaily.com/20january09_newindians.htm

AD345

27th January 2009, 19:25

8) Victory Kingpin - I really don't mind the oversized cylinder heads but a soon as you leave the engine bay on the Kingpin you run into a train wreck. The fender angles are more wrong than anything on this side of a Stratoliner, the exhaust should be sawed off before even venturing out of the dealership, the headlight should be set back on the VTX from where it was stolen, and the fuel tank... well... there just is no excuse for the fuel tank: a curved teardrop mess which is punified by the rest of the bulky bike. Victory, this is your defeat.

Obviously he must die.

MentalFacility

27th January 2009, 19:28

almost all of it is bs.

Bonez

27th January 2009, 19:30

almost all of it is bs.No satire. The guys a legend.

Trudes

27th January 2009, 19:35

Nice to know my bike isn't considered ugly...... boring maybe, but not ugly!:lol:

tri boy

27th January 2009, 19:41

Looked and looked, but never saw the scrambler. (as if it could ever be called fugly):love:
But the DR Big:devil2: Sorry Dino, but you went home with the ugly girl:rofl:
No way is the Katana ugly. I think the dude just hates the whole "edge" design style.

Bonez

27th January 2009, 19:48

Rodney007

27th January 2009, 19:50

i duno if i qualify for motorcycling history, but texmo nabed one of me eating and blinking and its pretty damn ugly, im sure its up somewhere

Dean

27th January 2009, 19:59

wheres the gn250 i didnt see it on the list.what am i saying the only reason why my bike is ugly is coz i ride it.

pete376403

27th January 2009, 20:11

Quote "10) Kawasaki KLR 650 - Anyone who designs a motorcycle with a brown saddle and then mixes it with white and green semi-camo paintjob and then proceeds to slather that mess atop a peaked "morning wood under the sheets" tank and a completely useless minifairing deserves to be raking latrines for a living. Most of the KLR variants were just about as butt ugly as this model, and let's not forget the hideous Tengai!"
Yeah well, KLRs have never been really pretty as such and they have don some wierd colur combos through the ages. Love his description of the tank, I'll look at the bike in a different light from now on.

Edit - just found I've got two bikes on that list - Cool!

10) Suzuki GS Tourer - Although Suzuki did a reasonable job at their GS versions of the Universal Japanese Tourer, when it came time to outfitting it for touring they decided not to spend more than $20 styling it and thus created one of the true monsters of the UJM era. Would it have been possible to incorporate any more pointless manta ray slots into the Vetter Windjammer ripoff fairing? Could the backrest be any squarer and flatter? Would it have pained the company to design a new tank so that from the side you didn't think that it was a SUZ? File this one under Trash!

NiggleC

27th January 2009, 20:18

Ahhh....... opinions. As Loudon Wainwright wrote in one of his songs "the worlds a place of horror cause each man thinks he's right".

I do think some of these are a wind up tho' i love the looks of the Vincent Black Prince (if you had one in the garage you would be thinking of early retirement if you sold it) and the Bimota Tesi.
my last 3 bikes have been 1984 BMW R80G/S:niceone:, 1997 BMW R1100GS and now a VStrom 1000. i think i am well qualified on what an ugly bike looks like.

Dean

27th January 2009, 20:24

The Stranger

27th January 2009, 21:04

They have a much broader definition of 'motard' than I do.
The KLR650 is ugly, but it isn't a motard :oi-grr:

And what's with calling the SV a sportsbike?

The Stranger

27th January 2009, 21:13

The RC8?
The ugliest sprots bike?
Please...

I have some bad news for you, ALL KTM's are ugly as hell.
As a multiple KTM owner you are no doubt devoid of any shred of self respect and should recuse yourself.

Oscar

27th January 2009, 21:28

I have some bad news for you, ALL KTM's are ugly as hell.
As a multiple KTM owner you are no doubt devoid of any shred of self respect and should recuse yourself.

You could be right, but at this point I have to admit that before I owned my 950Adv I called it ugly, in print. I covered the 2003 Motor Show for Kiwi Rider:

Wandering around the motorcycle stands, I soon found the two bikes I was looking for: the KTM 950 adventure bike and the Kawasaki Z1000. I’d never seen a real live KTM LC8 before, so it was a bit of a shock – damn, that’s an ugly motorcycle. I suppose that as the Katoom’s major competition is THE world’s ugliest motorcycle (the BMW GS Adventure), the same utilitarian look was called for.

And speaking of ugly - Kawasaki, have you checked the water in your design department? Maybe I’m getting old, but those mufflers…and ORANGE paint?! I’m told it’s retro – to evoke memories of the original Z1 (which I think you’ll find was maroon and black). I think that anyone who lived through the seventies would agree with my theory that the reason substance abuse was rife in that decade is that it was the only relief from the horrible orange/green & orange/black colour schemes of the day.

Skyryder

27th January 2009, 21:45

Laughed so hard I almost pissed myself.

Yep me too. I realy cracked up when he described one of the headlights as a Battlestar Galacta headlamp. I'm still pissin' m'self thiniking about it.

Still its a good read if ya don't take him too seriouse.

Skyryder

PrincessBandit

27th January 2009, 22:14

I'm with Bonez on this. I too almost had to change my knickers after laughing so hard. There were some damned ugly creations in those lists and his descriptions were hilarious.
Balu was disappointed there wasn't a scooter list. Perhaps that was for the best.
(or was there and I just didn't see it...)
Saw some of his favourites there though - the BMW F800ST, Honda DN01. I cracked up hardest over the Star Trek transporter beam comment, and the "so ugly insect that even a spider wouldn't eat it". Classic.

Gremlin

27th January 2009, 23:16

I have some bad news for you, ALL KTM's are ugly as hell.
As a multiple KTM owner you are no doubt devoid of any shred of self respect and should recuse yourself.
Cute coming from a pretty boy... both yours are yamahas... :Pokey:

Since I only own one, I naturally have good taste. I've found its actually got an excellent 3/4 look for pictures...

I'm trying to imagine the number of hits his site is taking, simply from KB :blink:

The Stranger

27th January 2009, 23:56

Cute coming from a pretty boy... both yours are yamahas... :Pokey:

Me Pretty? Get your eyes checked - urgent!

It's that fucken ladyboy YamahaArseSex4Life, he's the only pretty boy Yamaha rider and he's fucked it up for all Yamaha riders now hasn't he?

slowpoke

28th January 2009, 01:40

With a few notable exceptions that are almost universally dry retched upon, this list seems to prove one thing: some people actually do crave mediocrity.

Winston001

28th January 2009, 02:35

Yep me too. I realy cracked up when he described one of the headlights as a Battlestar Galacta headlamp. I'm still pissin' m'self thiniking about it.

Still its a good read if ya don't take him too seriouse.

Yep. This guy is classic. ;) It doesn't matter that you don't agree with his opinion, he's just so damned funny and erudite about it. :yes: I think he's wrong as often as right but the descriptions are hilarious. And its a wind-up anyway, nothing serious.

Gremlin

28th January 2009, 03:29

It's that fucken ladyboy YamahaArseSex4Life, he's the only pretty boy Yamaha rider and he's fucked it up for all Yamaha riders now hasn't he?
Rhetorical question I presume? :lol:

Sounds like you're upset... need a hug?

Ask Raj. :dodge:

dipshit

28th January 2009, 08:54

And what's with calling the SV a sportsbike?

haha... That's what i was thinking... at least the SV made it into the sportsbike section!

There should have been a sports/touring section as well. Then there would have been somewhere to list Ducati ST's :sick:

Devil

28th January 2009, 09:20

Awww damn, my 690 only got to 2nd ugliest motard!

slofox

28th January 2009, 10:39

Don't necessarily agree with all these but have to say there are some Fugly Suckin' Isters in there.....

twotyred

28th January 2009, 10:54

great stuff, I found myself agreeing with his calls about 70% of the time,especially the modern angular stuff and the metric cruisers

portokiwi

28th January 2009, 11:03

:( i like the way the Katana looks. its a great looking bike.

MaxB

28th January 2009, 11:30

Armitage Shanks

28th January 2009, 17:18

The 400/4 on the ugly list FFS. That bike is rated as one of Hondas best ever designs.

The Honda 350/4 POS he bangs on about sold very few until it was rejigged as an authority (cop) bike for asian dictatorships. Even then they lost heaps of $$$ on it.

Its obvious from the list that he does'nt like angular styled bikes. I liked some of his summaries but he seems so out of touch, like somehow the world of motorcycling has passed him by. Agree about the 400/4 this guy seems to have a pre-programmed aversion to a lot of bikes without any intimate knowledge ( read ' a second look ' ) I agree with a lot of what he says however, especially the current Euro Bikes with the framework and bling etc. Yamaha leave the room. Last good looking Bike they made was the FJ1200, but how can he call the Gen1 V-Max ugly ?

Glad my bike made it on the list though I refer to my Hayabusa as the Hayabugly ( The Bug )...at least it's striking and always gets a second look....and a few thumbs up.

bladerider97

28th January 2009, 18:58

Both my bikes made the list, The RE5 #1 of the golden age well done. The Blade (although mine is an earlier one) made the list also.

So its decided I have no taste in motorbikes.:slap:

Armitage Shanks

28th January 2009, 19:08

Both my bikes made the list, The RE5 #1 of the golden age well done. The Blade (although mine is an earlier one) made the list also.

So its decided I have no taste in motorbikes.:slap: But...where's the Dirt bike section...and the Trail Bike...Scooters.....

Mopeds ....?:laugh:

pzkpfw

28th January 2009, 23:09

Damn, I like the Bionicle Delirio, Tesi 2D and Tesi 3D.

Forest

29th January 2009, 00:08

I've always believed that it doesn't matter if you love or hate a motorcycle design, just as long as it makes you feel something.

A bike can only be ugly if it makes you feel nothing at all.

slofox

29th January 2009, 15:27

The Honda Rune looks like a railway locomotive...

NZsarge

29th January 2009, 15:52

I like the ZX14, it shouldn't be there IMO.
Ha ha, right on dude!

The RC8?
The ugliest sprots bike?
Please...
Ugliest? Perhaps not but they ain't no oil painting either, it has some great design elements but the front around the headlight could have worked out better...

Dissing Yamaha? The structural elements that go into Yamaha's top end bikes can capture an entire evening of just looking for me. Vacuum die-cast parts, hidden cabling, crinkle finish paint, and washers that have no sharp edges scream quality values and thought at every stage of the design phase.

Oh well.
This proves everything you say must be true... :niceone:

Ugliest? Of the top of my head i'd have to say the Honda DN01 although very nicely screwed together i'm sure...

Oscar

29th January 2009, 16:00

Ugliest? Perhaps not but they ain't no oil painting either, it has some great design elements but the front around the headlight could have worked out better...

Oh, I agree it's no Rembrandt (more like a Picasso!).
KTM always annoy me when the don't quite match the plastics - particularly on the orange LC8's and Adv's. The colours are shades out (which may be deliberate) and they have matt paint next to gloss paint.

NZsarge

29th January 2009, 16:10

Oh, I agree it's no Rembrandt (more like a Picasso!).
KTM always annoy me when the don't quite match the plastics - particularly on the orange LC8's and Adv's. The colours are shades out (which may be deliberate) and they have matt paint next to gloss paint.

The RC8 looks better in white IMO, I really like the look of SuperDuke's, again not pretty bikes as such but has the "X" factor and attitude in spades... Plus it's a great ride.

piston broke

29th January 2009, 19:18

i found 2 bikes i've owned in there,1 i agree with.

cb 400f supersport was and is still a great bike.

yamaha xv 1100 was the worst bike i ever owned,i guess i'm not a cruiser rider.

Big Zappa

29th January 2009, 20:54

Hahaha thanks for the laugh, these guys know how to take the piss!

Lonebull

30th January 2009, 18:47

http://hubpages.com/hub/Top-100-Ugliest-Motorcycles-In-History---The-Ultimate-List

There is something in there to piss off pretty much everybody.

Me - Im pissed because the V-Strom didnt even make the list.

Anything he has listed that you disagree with? Grab a bourbon and discuss.

umm and the typo in the title was on purpose. honest.

Boy you nailed this one. A great list but bound to piss off someone you know (and i agree with the V-strom thing ughhh)

I see the Busa is Number 4 on the sportsbike list, this is not unexpected. When they first came out I vowed I would never own one. It was the fugliest thing I had ever seen. I guess I mellowed with age. Mine is an 04. Its a great bike.

Nice to see the paso in there, talk about a study in bland, can't agree with the RC8 though. That thing raises some serious wood...

Winston001

30th January 2009, 20:56

Thought he was a bit tough on the Triumph Tiger but.......those bug eyes at the front do make his point. :rolleyes: The V-Strom should have beaten it.

rabidnz

2nd February 2009, 19:16

glad to see the speed triple in there :)

KrazyGixxerBoy

1st September 2009, 17:31

Awww!...what do you mean the Paso's ugly! :gob: ...ok....it's pretty fucken bad! haha. Still like riding it! :Punk:

toycollector10

1st September 2009, 19:03

Quoted on page three...

"The original Z1 New York Steak, a motorcycle with lines so classic that it looks just as good today as it did in its premiere almost four decades ago"

:first:

98tls

1st September 2009, 19:12

Awww!...what do you mean the Paso's ugly! :gob: ...ok....it's pretty fucken bad! haha. Still like riding it! :Punk: Actually found the Paso good to look at personally,still do.Riding one was another thing,had an 89 Sport:Oops:Bloody terrible.

Conquiztador

1st September 2009, 19:41

One I remembered I hated as soon as I came across on the web awhile ago:

Confederate Motor Company's Renaissance Fighter.

"The Fighter clarifies opaqueness and nullifies hype with straight-forward true to concept certitude. At the source is a classic right triangle. Proportion is classically derived. Scale is middle way. Bearing exudes structural permanence. Human integration deploys yang energy, vitality and power in the most simple, pure and direct form".

Right... A designers way of saying "If you hate this marvel I have created you have no understanding of anything... (And I was totally wasted when i came up with this thing)" Then that nobody could probably ride the thing for longer than 10 minutes w/o getting sore in all parts is not important.

But at US $110,000 the chance we will see them clattering the bike parties is slim...

modboy

1st September 2009, 19:51

I was surprised to see the speed trip in there, even before I got the thruxton home I was drooling over the speed trips. The new model is a bit overworked I'd have to agree, but nothing like a stripped down fighter with plenty of grunt. I thought the speed trip might be my next bike ...
I certainly think it's a better looking bike than the Brutale or Monster.

I'd have to agree the Paso is an abomination. Compared to the current Ducati superbike line up at least.