Biker life as we knew it is over... [Archive]

Conquiztador

12th February 2009, 23:24

- There is this "metric system" that makes a 1/2 inch spanner 13 mill
- The back wheel is driven by a rubber belt. (Fuck me dead!!!)
- The petrol taps do not work when turned to "on". They need a vacuum from a bike that does not start because the petrol taps are not providing petrol as there is no vacuum as the motor is not running...
- You can't adjust the carbi. There is none...
- You cant take the tyre off and fix the tube, There is none...
- If you grease the cables they seize!

What have I missed?

Add here:

SARGE

12th February 2009, 23:30

my 84 FJ1100 had self canceling turn signals.. my 93 doesn't

fuel gauges..

digital clocks..

kick starts..

GAH!!

Max Preload

12th February 2009, 23:37

- There is this "metric system" that makes a 1/2 inch spanner 13 mill

Don't forget the 3/4" is now 19mm...

my 84 FJ1100 had self canceling turn signals.. my 93 doesn't

Ditto for my FZ750. WTF! And electric fuel switches.

ducatilover

12th February 2009, 23:39

it doesnt start by hitting it to reset the timing

oh and that vacum thing? the spada is a c*nt for that :girlfight:

Big Dave

12th February 2009, 23:42

Don't care.

1 horsepower per 1 kilogram if I want it and I have a nice stereo in my helmet.

Conquiztador

13th February 2009, 00:06

Don't care.

1 horsepower per 1 kilogram if I want it and I have a nice stereo in my helmet.

We live in different worlds.

Edbear

13th February 2009, 06:10

Carefully setting the timing advance lever when starting to (try) and avoid the kickback... :done:

Being very fussy with this usually served to lull one into a false sense of security so that when the bike did kick back visciously, one's foot was fully on the kickstarter and took the full brunt of it causing heavy bruising and resulting in a foot too sore to change gear. (right side gear lever)... :eek:

Pwalo

13th February 2009, 06:23

And who can forget the delights of kick starting a hot 500cc single. I love my all electric, all metric, FI bike.

sinfull

13th February 2009, 06:27

We live in different worlds.
But his hands are clean now too ! Ever seen a mechs keyboard ? You can not be a writer if you have to work on your bikes !

Conquiztador

14th February 2009, 13:31

But his hands are clean now too ! Ever seen a mechs keyboard ? You can not be a writer if you have to work on your bikes !

So that would then answer the question why I need a job to support those two...:weep::weep:

imdying

14th February 2009, 14:01

- There is this "metric system" that makes a 1/2 inch spanner 13 mill1/2 inch, what's that? :confused:

- The back wheel is driven by a rubber belt. (Fuck me dead!!!Only on gay bikes :yes:

- The petrol taps do not work when turned to "on". They need a vacuum from a bike that does not start because the petrol taps are not providing petrol as there is no vacuum as the motor is not running...That'd be the prime position you're looking for.

- You can't adjust the carbi. There is none...And that'd be the power commander you're looking for.

- You cant take the tyre off and fix the tube, There is none...A blessing if your bike isn't slow :scooter:

- If you grease the cables they seize!There's a correct product for every job :msn-wink:

What have I missed?

Add here:Logic? :innocent:

MIXONE

14th February 2009, 14:06

There was always something cool about kicking a bike into life.
Now I have to make do with kicking the wife into life.

Bonez

14th February 2009, 14:08

I'll take metric any day. I was scarred for life using "imperial" on Pom and Yank a/c.

Have you not fitted tubes to tubeless tires?

Belt final drives around before chain drive, rubber has just taken over from leather.

Some fuel taps usually have a "prime" position(but imdying has covered that I see).

Goody now I don't get as dirty fitting cables.

No mention of the clipper slutch...................shame on you!

McJim

14th February 2009, 14:13

Just buy an older bike. There were some perfectly good machines on the market 20 years ago - properly looked after they are as much fun today as they were then. the trick is not to go on group rides too often as it becomes a pissing contest where people want to show off the fact that they have this year's model.

MIXONE

14th February 2009, 14:16

McJim

14th February 2009, 14:19

Group rides scare the crap out of me!

should come out for a ride with me then - we can argue about who rides at the very end! :Pokey:

MIXONE

14th February 2009, 14:22

should come out for a ride with me then - we can argue about who rides at the very end! :Pokey:

You are already riding at the end.
Well Invers is the end of the world isn't it?

Big Dave

14th February 2009, 14:27

I spent 10 years keeping my Tbird in showroom condition and hanging in the shed. Was enough.

Belt drive - tell me they are ghey to my face :-)

<img src="http://homepage.mac.com/david_cohen_design/.Pictures/misc3/stoppie_kr.jpg">

Voltaire

14th February 2009, 17:02

Ixion

14th February 2009, 17:09

- There is this "metric system" that makes a 1/2 inch spanner 13 mill
..

No it's not! 1/2" Whitworth is about 0.820 across the flats , which is how metric spanners are measured. So that's about a 20mm spanner. 1/2" whit is a damn big bolt on a bike.

breakaway

14th February 2009, 17:23

When dealing with this electrickery one must take care as the smoke trapped inside the thing is what makes it work. Let it out, and you're done for.

Voltaire

14th February 2009, 17:25

No it's not! 1/2" Whitworth is about 0.820 across the flats , which is how metric spanners are measured. So that's about a 20mm spanner. 1/2" whit is a damn big bolt on a bike.

which reminds me....where do you get cycle thread taps and dies from?

Mine are old and some are missing...

Ixion

14th February 2009, 17:26

true. but the really important thing is not to become confused between imperial and metric smoke. Try to use metric smoke in imperial electrics and you'll blow them up for sure. Of course, with Eytalian bikes , metric electrics will blow themselves up frequently, with no input required at all. Just ask any Ducati owner.

Ixion

14th February 2009, 17:29

which reminds me....where do you get cycle thread taps and dies from?

Mine are old and some are missing...

Gaps! gaps are the devil. Cycle threa dis CEI. Discussed at present in this (http://www.kiwibiker.co.nz/forums/showthread.php?t=92436)thread

Mystic13

14th February 2009, 17:34

What I hate on my "modern" bike is if i get a flat battery i can't push start the thing because the bloody electronics won't initialise and therefore no engine management system and no spark. FFS. Surely it would be easy enough to set the bike to start froma push start then have the battery charge.

There are a fair few stories on the BMW forum of said rider merrily riding along and then the bike cuts- out and dies (while riding). The bike batery is found to be dying and consequently the bike can't be re-started. I like the stories when people are running in heavy fast traffic in the outside lane.

This is a real backward step. I'd hate to be caught out in the middle of nowhere with a bike I can't push start.

Conquiztador

14th February 2009, 18:08

Yes, call me a old bastard. but I won't have a bike that I cant kick to start it. Got a NV 400 sorted for my oldest, and I did take her to SI for a ride. (see my Blog) Worked bloody well, but I was soo worried that I would get a problem with the battery/drain it, and then have to push the thingy.

A kick, a carbie, taps w/o any vacuum stuff, no "black boxes" and air cooling and I can fix the thing on side of the road.

slofox

14th February 2009, 18:17

slofox

14th February 2009, 18:24

What I hate on my "modern" bike is if i get a flat battery i can't push start the thing because the bloody electronics won't initialise and therefore no engine management system and no spark.

With ya there Mystic - recently left the "parking lights" on by mistake..(what kinda pussy bike has PARKING LIGHTS???). Next morning the battery was dead and so was the bike. No ride until the friggin battery charged up. Lucky I own a battery chargererthingummy...

Vern

14th February 2009, 18:32

And who can forget the delights of kick starting a hot 500cc single. I love my all electric, all metric, FI bike.
Yeah specialy if you let the decompression lever off a bit soon.:shit:

slofox

14th February 2009, 18:43

One thing I do NOT miss is the Whitworth thread - coarse as hell and always prone to stripping...I lost count of the number of times I had to pull out a stud and replace cozza stripped thread. Gimme nice fine metric thread any day...

Conquiztador

14th February 2009, 18:55

1

Logic? :innocent:

Are you insinuating that I am lacking logic???

Where is the logic in: "Sorry, the commander unit is broken. Cant be fixed. U need a new one. Cost ya $750"

Or in: "You need to bring the bike in so we can connect it up to our computer and find out what is wrong. It might be that you are right, she is not getting petrol. But w/o connecting her up we won't know"

popelli

14th February 2009, 19:35

which reminds me....where do you get cycle thread taps and dies from?

from the complete set sitting under the work bench

Cycle thread taps and dies are still available

try unithread they have a website

they sell just about eveything including replacement taps for helicoil sets

also tracey tools sell cycle thread taps and dies

Bonez

14th February 2009, 19:49

Are you insinuating that I am lacking logic???

Where is the logic in: "Sorry, the commander unit is broken. Cant be fixed. U need a new one. Cost ya $750"

Or in: "You need to bring the bike in so we can connect it up to our computer and find out what is wrong. It might be that you are right, she is not getting petrol. But w/o connecting her up we won't know"Nah if the PC craps out you just unplug it and use the OEM ECU which is still on the bike.

ManDownUnder

14th February 2009, 19:54

some bastard swapped me reserve tank for an extra 50 ponies... and I ain't complaining for a second!!!!!

Conquiztador

14th February 2009, 19:54

Nah if the PC craps out you just unplug it and use the OEM ECU which is still on the bike.

Ssswwiiisssshhhhh....

Conquiztador

14th February 2009, 19:56

some bastard swapped me reserve tank for an extra 50 ponies... and I ain't complaining for a second!!!!!

U trying to convince us that your bike runs on horseshit??

ManDownUnder

14th February 2009, 20:22

U trying to convince us that your bike runs on horseshit??

I WISH!!!!!!!! Transport'd be free with the amount I talk

Paul in NZ

14th February 2009, 20:36

I think the twist grip took all the damned fun out of motorcycling...

Ixion

14th February 2009, 20:42

That's actually quite a valid point. The throttle lever was a bit more cumbersome , but it was more interactive. Especially when you had to juggle the throttle lever and the advance retard lever. And the hand gear change. (actually a hand gear change is much easier with a throttle lever) . Good thing there weren't any front brakes back then

Actually I still reckon that the rot set in when people started expecting brakes to WORK. What was wrong with them being ornamental?

Ocean1

14th February 2009, 20:44

The throttle lever was a bit more cumbersome , but it was more interactive. Especially when you had to juggle the throttle lever and the advance retard lever. And the hand gear change.

Good thing they were all on the steering tiller then.

ducatilover

14th February 2009, 20:45

it was pc [pretty cunty] to expect working brakes wasnt it? :mellow:

Ixion

14th February 2009, 20:50

ducatilover

14th February 2009, 21:02

worked a treat on the ts125...

untill it snapped:woohoo:

Conquiztador

14th February 2009, 21:47

Well, it made you think ahead. Faint echoes of the old days still remain in the sometimes heard advice to "lay the bike down to avoid a crash". Basically that's how it worked. If you needed to stop fastish you lowsided the bike. Worked better than you might think.

I rode Solo Speedway. There was no brakes. The technique to stop was to lay her down on the L/H side. Sadly that is where the open clutch and chains are. But it stops you very fast from 100K/h+. Have also used the technique to save my life one the road. Twice. Becomes a reflex.

wbks

14th February 2009, 22:30

Lol... I can understand on dirt... But... Maybe someone should call pirelli and tell them to start using soft metals for tires from now on, it seems to save so many people in an emergency braking situation... Must have superior traction or something...

Motu

14th February 2009, 22:52

Older bikes didn't have folding pegs,kickstarters,and had steel levers.Plenty to dig in and slow the bike down.I once lost 2inches from a kickstart lever - the mark was in the road for years until they resealed.I have layed a bike down on a speedway track too,it's instinctive and fast.

I have no problems with the electronics and techo stuff of a modern motorcycle - but the essence of a motorcycle to me is simplicity and function.I have been very happy to get away from the high tech and go back to a bike that is easy to work on and fix - I can change a carb diaphram in 5 minutes....just like on a Hillman Hunter.But I'd like to get away from things that need replacing like carb diaphrams even if they are easy to replace - Skinner's Union didn't need no diaphrams.

Big Dave

14th February 2009, 23:00

I like old motorcycles. Other people's old motorcycles are my favourite.

The pulse of a Meriden Bonneville is superior to a Hinckley. But it's just so noice to stick the key in the ignition and it starts every time, and gets home every time.

imdying

14th February 2009, 23:46

Are you insinuating that I am lacking logic???Yes.

Where is the logic in: "Sorry, the commander unit is broken. Cant be fixed. U need a new one. Cost ya $750"They're not made in England by Lucas.

Or in: "You need to bring the bike in so we can connect it up to our computer and find out what is wrong. It might be that you are right, she is not getting petrol. But w/o connecting her up we won't know"You mean the paper clip I insert into the loom which activates dealer mode and then shows me the fault codes on the dash? I hate to be the one to tell ya, but your fears appear to stem from ignorance.

Pixie

15th February 2009, 08:17

I rode Solo Speedway. There was no brakes. The technique to stop was to lay her down on the L/H side. Sadly that is where the open clutch and chains are. But it stops you very fast from 100K/h+. Have also used the technique to save my life one the road. Twice. Becomes a reflex.

One more Old Fart Rose Coloured Goggles Bullshit Thread.

Let's all develop the "Fall of The Bike If We Get Into Trouble" reflex

Conquiztador

15th February 2009, 09:11

One more Old Fart Rose Coloured Goggles Bullshit Thread.

Let's all develop the "Fall of The Bike If We Get Into Trouble" reflex

I take the "Old fart" part.
I detest the "Bullshit Thread"

And re the reflex: You hold on to the bike sonny, as it will shield you. But as Motu mentioned, todays bikes with all the plastics, folding footpegs, and add to that the asphalt/tar seal roads, you most probably slide further then if you had taken a handful of brake and held on standing up.

Then again, the two times I did lay the bike down I might not have been here if I had not.

Firs time: I was young and following the school bus (with school mates at the back window) too close on my little 2stroke (the drag effect made her go REALLY fast, or so it felt, probably 80k/h in reality) when the bus suddenly stopped. I laid her down on the L/H side and skidded under the bus where the bus back axle stopped my skidding. I lay there for ages (I thought) but reality was probably 15 seconds. The bus took off and I got up, kickstarted the bike and carried on.

Second time: Riding on a road I did not know in the rain night time too fast following others. I had fallen a little behind and tried on a straight catch up to them. The road suddenly turned 90 degrees to the left and I was going too fast. In the rain there was no way to stop, and there was a brick fence ahead. I laid the bike down and hit the wall with both wheels, front wheel first. I twisted the forks a fraction, damaged some other bits including my knee. Ended up in hospital for a couple of days. But inside a week I was back on the bike.

You be the judge. I rather have the bike between me and a solid object when hitting it instead of testing how good my leather gear really is on full impact.

Conquiztador

15th February 2009, 09:22

Yes.

They're not made in England by Lucas.

You mean the paper clip I insert into the loom which activates dealer mode and then shows me the fault codes on the dash? I hate to be the one to tell ya, but your fears appear to stem from ignorance.

In a past life I was an Electronic Engineer, so there is not much fear for electronics. I specialised in electro-mechanical machinery where fault diagnostics was a daily thing. Often I find that there was no fault with the machine, but the sensor that now was telling me that we had a problem was the culprit. Swap sensor and machine was back to fully functioning. Wonder how often this is the outcome in todays bike repairs? You are paying $200 to not fix a fault, but a sensor!

I was reading somewhere a chap complaining that his bike would die if the oil level sensor indicated that the oil level was too low. Brilliant!