Harley Davidson vs God

[sparrow_34]

Subject: Mr. Honda and God

Mr. Honda, of the Honda Motorcycle Corporation, died and went to heaven
for judgment. At the gates, St. Peter told Mr. Honda, "Since you've
been such a good man and your motorcycles have changed the world, your
reward is, you can hang out with anyone you want in Heaven."
Mr. Honda thought about it for a minute and then said, "I want to hang
out with God. I have a question for Him. St. Peter took Mr. Honda to the Throne Room and introduced him to God. He then asked God, "Aren't you the inventor of women?" God said, "Ah, yes. Indeed I am". "Well," said Mr. Honda, professional to professional, you have some major design
flaws in your design
1- There's too much inconsistency in the front-end protrusion.
2- It chatters constantly at high speeds.
3- Most of the rear ends are too soft and wobble too much.
4- The intake is placed way too close to the exhaust.
5- Plus the monthly down time and aggravation are outrageous, and I don't even wanna start talking about the maintenance costs.
"Hmmmm, you do raise some good points" replied God, "Let's have a wee
look." God went to his Celestial super computer, typed in a few things
and waited for the results. After a moment God said, "Well, it may be true
that my invention seems to be flawed, but according to these numbers, more men are riding my invention than yours."
:laugh:

[Riff Raff]

:killingme :killingme :niceone:

:Oops: Just remembered I ride a Honda

[bear]

The joke is Gold!

[Ghost Lemur]

bahahaha :killingme

Brilliant Sparrow.

[jrandom]

Isn't that funny.

Same joke was posted months and months back, but with Arthur Davidson as the dead dude, and I commented that Soichiro Honda would be a better choice as someone complaining about God's engineering skills.

:spudwhat:

[Hitcher]

Isn't that funny.
Same joke was posted months and months back, but with Arthur Davidson as the dead dude, and I commented that Soichiro Honda would be a better choice as someone complaining about God's engineering skills.
That's true!

[Racey Rider]

Isn't that funny.

Same joke was posted months and months back, but with Arthur Davidson as the dead dude, and I commented that Soichiro Honda would be a better choice as someone complaining about God's engineering skills.

:spudwhat:



Wow!

Your not God, are you????

[jrandom]

Wow!

Your not God, are you????

Can't be.

Nobody ever complains about my engineering skills.

[Jamezo]

Can't be.

Nobody ever complains about my engineering skills.

yeah, your products all kill the end user before they can complain. :niceone:

[jrandom]

yeah, your products all kill the end user before they can complain. :niceone:

Doesn't matter; we have a disclaimer screen to the effect that if you die using the thing, it's your own problem...

[inlinefour]

First Law of the Workshop.

Don't bother lookin' for the thing... It's not there. All things dropped in workshop situations fall into worm holes and are transported to saturn (thats what the rings are made of).

Second Law of the Workshop.

Sometimes they do get sucked back through the worm hole by the vacuum created in your wallet caused by purchasing replacement parts.

Third Law of the Workshop.

All assemblies are created of lot's of parts. There are 2 sorts of parts. Parts that you don't drop and parts you do drop. All parts you drop are made of unobtainium, the rarest element in the universe. Unobtainium is a semi naturally occuring element found only on back order. It is never available in under 6 weeks. Be careful of obtainium parts because they are either the wrong part (that you didn't need) of made of didn't-fitium.

Fourth Law of the Workshop.

The people that write the service manuals have seldom worked on a bike and if they did, it was not one like yours.

:spudwave:

[cruzer]

The inventor of the Harley Davidson Motorcycle Corporation,
>> Arthur Davidson, died and went to heaven.
>> At the gates, St. Peter told Arthur, "Since you've been such a
>> good man and your motorcycles have changed the world, your reward is
>> you can hang out with anyone you want in Heaven."
>> Arthur thought about it for a minute and then said,
>> "I want to hang out with God."
>> St. Peter took Arthur to the Throne Room, and introduced him
>> to God. Arthur then asked God, "Hey, aren't you the inventor of
>> woman?" God said, "Ah, yes."
>> "Well," said Arthur, "professional to professional, you have some
>> major design flaws in your invention:
>> 1. There's too much inconsistency in the front-end protrusion.
>> 2. It chatters constantly at high speeds.
>> 3. Most of the rear ends are too soft and wobble too much.
>> 4. The intake is placed way too close to the exhaust.
>> 5. And the maintenance costs are outrageous."
>> "Hmmmm, you may have some good points there," replied
>> God,"hold on."
>> God went to his Celestial super computer, typed in a few words
>> and waited for the results. The computer printed out a slip of paper
and
>> God read it.
>> "Well, it may be true that my invention is flawed," God said to Arthur.
>> "But according to these numbers, more men are riding my invention
>> than yours."

[vifferman]

OLD. Been on here before, maybe more than once. :Pokey:

Please try harder next time. 1.5/10

[cruzer]

OLD. Been on here before, maybe more than once. :Pokey:

Please try harder next time. 1.5/10

If you have read this before then I guess it is not here for the benefit of just you........maybe some have not yet seen it........I wasnt trying for points but thanks :rockon:

[inlinefour]

The last time I read this joke it was Sochiro Honda and God. I like this one more... :rockon:

[marty]

Mr Honda, of the Honda Motorcycle Corporation, died and went to heaven for judgment. At the gates, St. Peter told Mr Honda, "since you've been such a good man and your motorcycles have changed the
world, your reward is, you can hang out with anyone you want in Heaven."

Mr Honda thought about it for a minute and then said, "I want to hang out
with God. I have a question for Him."

St. Peter took Mr Honda to the Throne Room and introduced him to God.

Mr. Honda then asked God, "Aren't you the inventor of women?"

God Said, "Ah, yes. Indeed I am".

"Well," said Mr Honda, "Professional to professional, you have some major design flaws in your design;

1- There's too much inconsistency in the front-end protrusion.

2- It chatters constantly at high speeds.

3- Most of the rear ends are too soft and have excessive wobble.

4- The intake is placed way too close to the exhaust.

5- Plus the monthly down time and aggravation are outrageous, and I don't
even wanna start talking about the maintenance costs.



"Hmmmm, you do raise some good points" replied God, "Lets have a wee
look."

God went to his Celestial super computer, typed in a few things and
waited for the results.

After a moment God said, "Well, it may be true that my invention seems to
be flawed, but according to these numbers, more men are riding my invention than yours."

[texmo]

re-post. Did I beat sniper ????

[Sniper]

I haven't been here mate, and yes you did, rep your way.

[DemonWolf]

Bloody funny anyway!.. loved it

[texmo]

I haven't been here mate, and yes you did, rep your way.
Chur, your not far from the 10,000 mark at the rate you post.

[Sniper]

I know, but Im careful of what I post now.

[texmo]

I know, but Im careful of what I post now.
I can tell. you only really post stuff thats worth posting now not pointless drivel.

[Sniper]

I can tell. you only really post stuff thats worth posting now not pointless drivel.

Yea, I got told off so now Im trying to behave. :niceone:

[texmo]

Yea, I got told off so now Im trying to behave. :niceone:
ahhh so thats why your behaving so much, wouldnt want to get into trouble with the admins would you¿

[Grahameeboy]

Yea, I got told off so now Im trying to behave. :niceone:

and I am trying to mis-behave..............:angry2:

[Sniper]

ahhh so thats why your behaving so much, wouldnt want to get into trouble with the admins would you¿

I have no life, just imagine what it would be like if I lost KB........ :bleh: :killingme

[texmo]

I have no life, just imagine what it would be like if I lost KB

I dunno tell what it you be like.

[texmo]

What? :spudwhat:
what are you talking about:weird:

[Trouss]

Arthur Davidson, the inventor of the Harley-Davidson motorcycle, died and went to heaven.

At the gates, St. Peter told Arthur, "Since you've been such a good man and your motorcycles have changed the world, your reward is, you can hang out with anyone you want in Heaven."

Arthur thought about it for a minute, then said, "I want to hang out with God."

St. Peter took Arthur to the Throne Room and introduced him to God.

God recognized Arthur and commented, "Okay, so you were the one who invented the Harley Davidson motorcycle?"

Arthur said, "Yes, that's me."

God said, "Well, what's the big deal in inventing something that's pretty unstable, makes noise and pollution and can't run without a road?"

Arthur was apparently embarrassed, but finally he said, "Excuse me, but aren't You the inventor of woman?"

God said, "Yes."

"Well," said Arthur, "professional to professional, you have some major design flaws in your invention:

1. There's too much inconsistency in the front-end protrusions...

2. It chatters constantly at high speeds...

3. Most of the rear ends are too soft and wobble too much.

4. The intake is placed way too close to the exhaust...

5. And the maintenance costs are enormous!"

"Hmmmmm, you have some good points there," replied God, "hold on."

God went to His Celestial super computer, typed in a few words and waited for the results. The computer printed out a slip of paper and God read it.

"Well, it may be true that my invention is flawed," God said to Arthur, "but according to these numbers, more men are riding my invention than yours."
:Punk::Punk::Punk:

[Paul in NZ]

Usually its the bikes the devil has a hand in that are more memorable...

[Pwalo]

Hang on, going to Heaven. Doesn't that go against the whole HD ethos?

[007XX]

Hang on, going to Heaven. Doesn't that go against the whole HD ethos?

Depends...are you talking about the ones with or without money? :shifty:

[Blackbird]

Here's one for the Ducatisti on KB! I adapted it slightly from something I saw in a US mag a few years ago.

[Her_C4]

Here's one for the Ducatisti on KB! I adapted it slightly from something I saw in a US mag a few years ago.

Ha ha ha - I LOVE it.... I sent off to Lynda Blair..... :sunny: :sunny:

[Paul in NZ]

Here's one for the Ducatisti on KB! I adapted it slightly from something I saw in a US mag a few years ago.

I guess only God could afford the time and have the resources to run one....

[Paul in NZ]

Hang on, going to Heaven. Doesn't that go against the whole HD ethos?

They go to the Indian spirit riding grounds (looks like a big David Mann painting) where all the men are hairy and all the chicks have giant breasts, all the animals are either horses, wolves or eagles and all the roads go past inspiring desert scenes - cool eh!

[Blackbird]

I guess only God could afford the time and have the resources to run one....

Or the patience of a saint:innocent:

[cooneyr]

The inventor of the Harley-Davidson motorcycle, Arthur Davidson , died and went to heaven. At the gates, St. Peter told Arthur. 'Since you've been such a good man and your motorcycles have changed the world, your reward is, you can hang out with anyone you want to in heaven.'

Arthur thought about it for a minute and then said, ' I want to hang out with God.' St. Peter took Arthur to the Throne Room, and introduced him to God. God recognized Arthur and commented, 'Okay, so you were the one who invented the Harley-Davidson motorcycle? '

Arthur said, 'Yeah, that's me...' God commented: 'Well, what's the big deal in inventing something that's pretty unstable, makes noise and pollution and can't run without a road?' Arthur was a bit embarrassed, but finally spoke, 'Excuse me, but aren't you the inventor of woman?' God said, 'Ah, yes.'

'Well,' said Arthur, 'professional to professional, you have some major design flaws in your invention !
1. There's too much inconsistency in the front-end suspension
2. It chatters constantly at high speeds
3. Most rear ends are too soft and wobble about too much
4. The intake is placed way too close to the exhaust
5. The maintenance costs are outrageous!!!!

'Hmmmmm, you may have some good points there,' replied God, 'hold on.' God went to his Celestial supercomputer, typed in a few words and waited for
the results. The computer printed out a slip of paper and God read it.

'Well, it may be true that my invention is flawed,' God said to Arthur, 'but according to these numbers, more men are riding my invention than yours'.

Cheers R

[Tank]

What god forgot was that the maintenance cost of a Harley is a lot cheaper than a woman.


And of you choose to get another ride - a Harley dosnt take 1/2 your house.

[Brownbikerbabe]

The inventor of the Harley-Davidson motorcycle, Arthur Davidson , died and went to heaven.

At the gates, St. Peter told Arthur. 'Since you've been such a good man and your motorcycles
have changed the world, your reward is, you can hang out with anyone you want to in heaven.'

Arthur thought about it for a minute and then said, ' I want to hang out with God.'

St. Peter took Arthur to the Throne Room, and introduced him to God.

God recognized Arthur and commented, 'Okay, so you were the one who invented the Harley-Davidson
motorcycle? '

Arthur said, 'Yeah, that's me...'

God commented: 'Well, what's the big deal in inventing something that's pretty unstable, makes noise
and pollution and can't run without a road?'

Arthur was a bit embarrassed, but finally spoke, 'Excuse me, but aren't you the inventor of woman?'

God said, 'Ah, yes.'

'Well,' said Arthur, professional to professional, you have some major
design flaws in your invention !



1. There's too much inconsistency in the front-end suspension


2. It chatters constantly at high speeds


3. Most rear ends are too soft and wobble about too much


4. The intake is placed way too close to the exhaust


5. The maintenance costs are outrageous!!!!


'Hmmmmm, you may have some good points there,' replied God, 'hold on.'

God went to his Celestial supercomputer, typed in a few words and
waited for the results.

The computer printed out a slip of paper and God read it.

'Well, it may be true that my invention is flawed,' God said to
Arthur, 'but according to these numbers, more men are riding my
invention than yours.'

[Brownbikerbabe]

I really have a bad habit of doing that don't I? Sorry:Oops: