Senior moments swapping between vehicles?

[martybabe]

I got a call the other day from my daughter " Dad can you come to my work, mom has broke the gearbox, no wait she's found it" end call.

WTF, turns out the bride has had access to the hospital car pool auto vehicles recently and swapping to her own manual car she had put her foot on the brake pedal and tried to ram the gearstick into reverse, completely forgetting the clutch pedal. :eek:

I'm not taking the piss here, I've had many such problems switching vehicles and not engaging the brain. Working for the AA in Englandshire I regularly drove upwards of 20 vehicles a day and mishaps were many. Two that stand out are, delivering a SAAB to the factory, I had to park some twenty minutes away from reception and walk over to hand in the keys. Do ya think I could get the bloody keys out, after half an hour trying everything I could think of, I had to bite the bullet and leave a $60,000 car with the keys in the ignition and hike to find Help.

ME; "Mate I've just bought you a car in but the cars poked, the keys won't come out the bastard ignition, bloody heap of junk" ....

SAAB bloke: ."did you put the car in reverse? has to be in reverse to get the keys out dude"

ME: "FFS, it's parked about a mile away with the keys in"...

SAAB bloke: "See you in about 40 minutes then He He"

1 and a half hours after arriving I drove off, all I had to do was hand in some fuggin car Keys!:bash:

TVR, key less entry, unlock with key fob still can't open door ??? turns out there's a button under the wing mirror to release door catch, 2 phone calls and an hour later I actually got in the the drivers seat :clap:

Two hours on a Quad bike, Sweet but as soon as I got familiar with the damn thing I'd use the clutch to change gear.......except the clutch lever is a brake lever so every five minutes or so I'd do an emergency stop much to the displeasure of the guys behind me.

Owners of old British bikes and Japas must have tales to tell!

Clearly I'm cross vehicle dysfunctional but I know I'm not alone.

Time to Fess up guys, what where and how have you malfunctioned vehicularly? :apint:

[Okey Dokey]

I only had my 750 (yes, bad girl) when I went to sit my bike licencing test, so I borrowed "something" from a local bike shop. The brake and clutch levers were reversed, and the gears went down rather than up.

I bunny-hopped my way around town on this thing, and somehow managed to pass my test. Gawd, the concentration involved- everytime I relaxed a little my normal riding muscular memory kicked in and I nearly stalled.

I suspect the tester knew what was up and had a good laugh while following me around!

[Ixion]

Oddly enough I have never had any problems switching from bikes with gear change on the correct side to ones with the perverted wrong stupid left hand gear change. The only time it shows up is when deciding which foot to put down when coming to a stop , or when going to apply the rear brake for a hill start or similar. Once actually riding, instinct takes care of it.

I've never been sure if it's just the different feel of scrap iron or something more complex. I've occasionally idly considered changing a Titan gearchange to the correct side (the Titan can be left or right) and seeing if a right hand change jap bike confuses me.

The thing I have the greatest problem with is silly. My old Suzukis don't have the 'press to cancel' functionality on the indicators. It's just a three position slide switch and you have to manually slide it back to central. The number of times I've gone 'press - huh, what's wrong, press press press bloody switch is broken, oh, wait, yeah '

[MisterD]

Not a senior moment (I was only 20 at the time) but my most embarrasing swap related moment was when I was working my summer hols on a local farm. I had just finished ploughing a field and the next job was to "knock it down" with a disc harrow. So I pootled off to the yard and dropped of the plough and hitched up the discs.

Back in the field I'd spent the last couple of days trudging up and down, brain fade struck...now even those non agriculturally-aquainted types will probably appreciate that a plough is narrower than the tractor and is setup so you run your wheels along next to the line you wish to follow...so that's what I did as I set off along the edge of the field.

Snap! Twang! Snap!...bugger...yes, discs are wider than the tractor and I had just uprooted 20m of wire fence which was now wrapped around said disc harrow...:o

[kasper]

I ride the bike to work, long way of course. I jump in to the truck for work. checks done truck good to go,

I hit rush hour traffic.

Sweat cars pulled to left and right side of lanes respectfully, perfect lane splitting opportunity ( For a bike) S#$%% #@$%$%




Anyway long story short i stop with about 50cm left to spare with a couple of scared cagers sat in front of me.

I am sure they were thinking damn bloody woman drivers.



The worst part of this was i realize i am still wearing all my bike armour. lid an all.

[Ixion]

Oh, everyone's tried to lane split a car. Can actually be a big dangerous, cos your brains goes "tweedle deedle, oh looky, traffics stopping ahead, just slow down a bit and line up the gap, dum de dum OH SHIT I'M NOT A BIKE , BRAKE BRAKE BRAKE "

A while ago I even discovered (it was pointed out to me actually) that I was trying to countersteer the Pajero!

[CookMySock]

try spending about 4 hours cornering hell out of a jetboat (slide its arse everywhere at full power is the primary method operandi) :headbang: and then getting in a car on a wet road. Bad idea!! First corner, and WTF are we doing sideways?? :banana:

Steve

[3umph]

try spending about 4 hours cornering hell out of a jetboat (slide its arse everywhere at full power is the primary method operandi) :headbang: and then getting in a car on a wet road. Bad idea!! First corner, and WTF are we doing sideways?? :banana:

Steve

good watching new jetboaters back off when in the shit or not sure what they are doing.... no power = no steering = more in shit....lol
seen many a boat fall out of the water because of that :clap:

My mother only use to drive manuals... never drove an auto... one day her car was in getting serviced and loan car was auto...
many a time se was trying to clutch it to stop...lol

[Boob Johnson]

Last car was a BMW coupe, took me two + years to get used to the wipers/indicators in reverse, forever turning the wipers on to make a turn lol. Had it for nearly 4 years so got used to it. Then back to a jap car so back wipers for indicating again lol, bloody annoying :bash:

[Hemex]

Did a 400 odd Km ride on a Royal Enfield Bullet 350... With the gear lever on the right hand side... Reached desired destination and decided to give the old Bullet a break and jumped onto the God of Death Yamaha RD350(high torque edition) to head out for some grub...
Yeah, got into first gear alright and let the beast rip...No sign off second gear though... kept jamming the bloody backbrake... and after about 2 minutes of 'horse riding' around was aware of the gear/brake lever swap... Cool bananas...

Not until an emergency braking Manoeuvre was required... got the front brake alright but instead of the back brake....got the bike from 3rd to second gear a little too fast... and honestly, was speaking in soprano for a while..

[Okey Dokey]

Did a 400 odd Km ride on a Royal Enfield Bullet 350... With the gear lever on the right hand side... Reached desired destination and decided to give the old Bullet a break and jumped onto the God of Death Yamaha RD350(high torque edition) to head out for some grub...
Yeah, got into first gear alright and let the beast rip...No sign off second gear though... kept jamming the bloody backbrake... and after about 2 minutes of 'horse riding' around was aware of the gear/brake lever swap... Cool bananas...

Not until an emergency braking Manoeuvre was required... got the front brake alright but instead of the back brake....got the bike from 3rd to second gear a little too fast... and honestly, was speaking in soprano for a while..

Yep, sounds exactly like my experience (except I am a natural soprano:clap:). Horse riding is a good way of putting it!

[CookMySock]

good watching new jetboaters back off when in the shit or not sure what they are doing.... no power = no steering = more in shit....lol Yeah LOL we used to deliberately scare people doing that.. Point the left side at the boat at some obstacle and then throttle off.. (yell UH OH! sliding sideways at 35mph - feels like 75mph) :pinch: Then opposite lock and full throttle and point the right side of the boat at said obstacle, throttle off (louder UH OH!!) rinse and repeat,:pinch: and at the last second miss it by only inches, :girlfight: inadvertantly (on purpose) lining up the next even bigger obstacle... all the time acting like we were way the hell outa control. :wacko:

Sigh, I miss my jetboat.

Steve

[martybabe]

Last car was a BMW coupe, took me two + years to get used to the wipers/indicators in reverse, forever turning the wipers on to make a turn lol. Had it for nearly 4 years so got used to it. Then back to a jap car so back wipers for indicating again lol, bloody annoying :bash:


:yes: Oh man that takes me back, two different trucks at the Fire station, controls on opposite sides to each other like you mention, the difference being when you put the wipers on to indicate you were turning or indeed put the indicators on because it had started raining, there were four or five ugly bastards on board to take the piss.

ocasionaly when I put the wipers on by mistake I'd quickly put the washers on too so it looked like I was intentionally cleaning the screen, no one ever queeried why I always decided to wash the screen as I was going around corners. :D

[thehollowmen]

My old flatmate had a volvo... or was it a VW..

Anyway, indicators and windscreen wipers were reversed. The amount of times I had a cop pull me over for not indicating while my windscreen wipers were still going.. I couldn't count them on my fingers and toes.

But the cops always had a good laugh at me, I never caused an accident, pulled over quickly, was polite and WOF/rego/seatbelt were all ok, so I was ALWAYS let off. :gob:

[Mom]

We have 3 cars, a little roller skate (manual), our big car and the work van (both auto). When I drive the little car the first few times I invariably stall the sucker when I come to a stop as I forget the clutch :o. The worst is though when you forget to push the clutch in and try and start it, just call me lurch ok?

One day I went down the road in the van. Got to the stupidmarket and parked, the friggen key would not come out of the ignition. No matter what I did, it was stuck tight. I had to leave the van parked full of gear, unlocked at the stupidmarket with the keys in the ignition. Amazingly it was all still there when I came back so I hopped in and tried to start it. Absolutely nothing, no dash lights, no attempt to turn over nothing at all!

You can imagine by now I am getting a bit pissed off, I had left my mobile at home so could not even ring Maha to come and rescue me. I was going to have to go and see if I could use the phone at the stupidmarket so I put the van in park and removed the ignition keys. I did what I hear you say? Yes indeed folks, the reason the keys would not come out of the ignition and the fact it would not start was all down to it being in Drive :yes:

The friggen blonde struck again, when I went to hacked off mode, the normal thought process worked and heypresto, select park and all is well.

What a dick!

[SpeedyGirl]

Working for a large company with my choice of company cars during the working day, something is bound to happen! Never worries me with the manual/auto thing, but everytime i get caught with the indicators and window wipers.... nothing new there, sadly tho.... i will admit to being blonde, I get into a new company car where the reverse is left and up... thats new me thinks....no one bothered to tell me you had to lift the lever on the gearstick for reverse to engage!
40 mins of swearing and getting really shitty, and contemplating pushing the damn car! I rang the usual driver, who after 5 mins of laughing at me (and relaying the conversation to the entire office), told me how to get the damn thing into reverse!!!

never forgot that lesson!

[Boob Johnson]

ocasionaly when I put the wipers on by mistake I'd quickly put the washers on too so it looked like I was intentionally cleaning the screen, no one ever queeried why I always decided to wash the screen as I was going around corners. :D
lol I can fully see you doing that Marty :lol:

[Mom]

...no one bothered to tell me you had to lift the lever on the gearstick for reverse to engage!


I can relate to that well. I got a little Holden Barina or something once to use as a courtesy car while mine was being serviced. Got in it and attempted to get it in reverse. Same shift pattern as my car, but it would no way go into reverse no matter what I did. In the end I had to go in and ask the service manager how to get it in reverse. "Just the same as in yours" he tells me. No, it really is not the same as mine because I cant get it in reverse, so he comes out to show me how to lift the lever on the shift stick. Ours was broken :o

[zooter]

In the early days of dual scooter and bike citizenship I spent a little too long in Scooterland. Jumped on the big bike and found the lack of gearshift action on the left handgrip a bit disconcerting.

[Motu]

I drive plenty of vehicles every day,without too much problem.I'm usually onto it with the wiper/lights being on different sides on Euro cars,but still get the odd swish of wipers for a right turn.But annoyingly there are some Japanese cars built in Europe with reversed controls.Driving a Pajero is an everyday job,to have one with indicators on the left is always a surprise.

I have never really had a problem with right or left shift either,it sort of goes with the bike.Like Ixion,footwork at a stop is still confusing.The BMW has no push to cancel indicators either - I find myself having to look at the switch to put it in the centre,not a safe procedure.

I used to work for a company that had two trucks with Eaton 2 speed diffs - and both were wired up opposite....one was down for high,the other up for high.It was bloody annoying to WOT a down shift with a fan of the clutch,only for the engine to hit the govenor,and the diff to be clattering a missed upshift.The boss wouldn't let me wire them the same....he reckoned it would confuse him!

[Number One]

Learnt to drive in an auto and drove them for years then I got my first bike :rolleyes: An RG150 :lol: THAT whole gear changing thing was a hard one to conquer while trying to learn how to ride two wheels but got there in the end :laugh: Not long after that got my first manual car and discovered the joy that is burnouts :headbang: have no trouble switching from auto to manual and back again.

What I HAVE struggled with is switching from the reverse pattern shifter on the bucket racer back to the SV when on the track. Haven't had issues with it on the road but at a recent track day just as I began to feel comfortable I weirdly found myself in the 'bucket racing zone' and changed down when I should've been changing up :pinch: big sideways rear end slide which thankfully buckets has taught me to cope with and I was back into nana zone taking it very tentatively again. :doh:

[LBD]

I work at a mine in central asia...we drive on the right with LHD light vehicals until we get close to the mine where we switch to driving on the left in LHD vehicals...

Original LHD vehicals have the indicators on the left of the column, LHD conversions have the indicators on the right of the column...some are automatic, some are manual, some have a column change where others have indicator lever and others have windscreen wiper lever.

All have the foot throttle on the right, some automatics have a foot operated park brake where the manuals have a clutch...(That one is fun)

Some have a horn on the end of the indicator stem others have a washer on the end of a wiper stem.

Away from the mine the roads are mainly single lane...I have seen 3 wide passing manouvers on blind corners...

You run over a farm animal you pay for it and it is never an old 1/2 dead animal, always a prime beast worth 3 times the going rate...despite appearances....Some farmers make a good living chasing stock onto the road ahead of foreign owned vehicals...

And after 6 months of this, I come back to NZ for a holiday and do you think I get fuddled driving back there with frazzeled nerves after all this...You betcha

[martybabe]

I work at a mine in central-asia.net drive on the right with LHD light vehicles until we get close to the mine where we switch to driving on the left in LHD vehicles...

Original LHD vehicles have the indicators on the left of the column, LHD conversions have the indicators on the right of the column...some are automatic, some are manual, some have a column change where others have indicator lever and others have windscreen wiper lever.

All have the foot throttle on the right, some automatics have a foot operated park brake where the manuals have a clutch...(That one is fun)

Some have a horn on the end of the indicator stem others have a washer on the end of a wiper stem.

Away from the mine the roads are mainly single lane...I have seen 3 wide passing maneuvers on blind corners...

You run over a farm animal you pay for it and it is never an old 1/2 dead animal, always a prime beast worth 3 times the going rate...despite appearances....Some farmers make a good living chasing stock onto the road ahead of foreign owned vehicles...

And after 6 months of this, I come back to NZ for a holiday and do you think I get fuddled driving back there with frazzled nerves after all this...You betcha

Bloody hell, I'm confused just reading that, don't think I'll go there my little brain would implode. :crazy:

[Pascal]

My regular cage is a left hand drive. So everything is reversed. Now after 7 years on NZ roads it's a comfortable vehicle for me and I'm used to driving from the "wrong" side of the road. Skidmarks the passengers though, because they're so close to oncoming traffic :)

But when I get in my wife's car I have a foreign-language school student problem with driving. I want to turn left? On goes the wipers. I want to turn right? On goes the wipers. Doesn't help that it's automatic as well, so a large part of the driving brain gets switched off.

I'm sure the rest of the world is laughing at this middle aged man switching on the windscreen wipers when he wants the indicators.

:sighs:

[FROSTY]

Part of my job is getting to spend a fair bit of time in the left seat of a cage or following a rider on a test ride.
I would love to write a book on the wonderful excuses I've heard for peoples er 'errors".

[Max Preload]

I would love to wright a book on the wonderfull excuses I've heard for Peoples er 'errors".

Write that book. Just promise you'll use a spell checker. :rofl:

[FROSTY]

Write that book. Just promise you'll use a spell checker. :rofl:
AWW SHUDDUP -- I was tyred k?:argh: