Some people shouldn't have a licence.

[FROSTY]

Holey cow this is totally nuts.
Lady called me a couple of weeks back.
"I looove the car but the brakes seem to get worse n worse as I drive" --"ohh and they are squeaking"
so she comes on in and the brakes are literally smoking hot.
Hmm --ok haul it all to bits front and rear -yep its been F#$#$# hot -so hot its MELTED the rubber anti squeal plate.
-Ok pads were new drums and disks brand new. maybee just one of those things.
All sliders checked/pads replaced--they were cooked. anti rattle plates replaced all good. copper kote on all slides n stuff.
Away she goes --Hmm tailights are awfully bright I thought.
3 days later --hey brakes are sqeaking again.
Car taken to brake expert who tells me--the F$$### brakes are cooked mate -new pads and shoes needed. -anything else wrong --NO
-today shes back -fuming Its all our fault -faulty /dangerous car etc etc. --her brakes are ferked again-
On a wim I hauled out the brake light on one side--funny its bloody hot.
Dont say a word. ---Quietly coat break pedal in chalk dust.
I suggest we go for a test drive --
away we go and sure enough brakes squeaking
Back in the yard and the chalk told an interesting tale -shes been using the brake as a footrest for her left foot. --of course she denied it till I showed her the distinct marks on the pedal and carpet from her boot.

OHH FFS--it must be my day for it--just had a phone call from an EXTREMELY pissed off scooter owner.
OYY you %$%$%$% you sold me a complete pile of S$#$# the F$%$% doesn't go.
Hmm ok hang on John (name changed to protect the stupid) tell me whats happened.
I turn the piece of s#$# on --all the lights work but when I push the red start putton nothing happens.
Er ok John --have you pulled the brake lever in ??
Why the F$%$ would I do that??
BECAUSE IF YOU DONT THE FUCKING THING WONT START
OH --click
Oh --and yes I did explain it all to him and yes there is a manual for it

[GurlRacer]

Oh ... my ... god. :laugh: :laugh:

Not all woman drivers are the same... I swear... :dodge:

[DEATH_INC.]

Lol, we usta have an old fella with the same problem.....we hooked up a buzzer so he knew when he had the brake pedal depressed and the problem went away......

[wbks]

Hey, it could be more dangerous... My sister was learning to drive, driving the car into the shed with my mum on the other end, when she made the mistake of stomping on the throttle instead of the brake and ran my mum over... Just be glad it's brake pads and not the habit of confusing pedals :(

[Lilly2w]

Ah, a brakey brakerson (probably from brakesville) I get stuck behind these people on a regular basis! usually on the tuka's!!

[MSTRS]

And to think that car manufacturers have taken away that handy little courtesy hanger. You know, the one marked with a C...
What's next??

[gatch]

I hope she doesn't teach her kids to drive..

[Dave Lobster]

I hope she doesn't teach her kids to drive..

Nobody does.. don't the instructions for driving come with the licence.. in the cornflakes??

[FROSTY]

No it aint just women drivers-check the phone call I just got -edited first post

[Blossom]

Yep there sure are some nutters out there. I once had the misfortune to discover a 'mate' had put oil in the brake lines because he thought it was the same thing.

[kezzafish]

ha haaa, that's classic. My mate very nearly rear ended a stationary car in a carpark while trying to move his truck whilst wearing mx boots, couldn't get his boot off both pedals... the harder he broke the harder it pushed. Twas downright hilarious

[Mully]

Lots of people shouldn't have licences, Frosty.

Did you charge the silly bint for the new pads??

[FROSTY]

waiting for the --Ohh Im sorry you were right phone call
TUI

[Ixion]

Of course, no one has ever been baffled by the Suzuki clutch-in-to-start trick.

[mowgli]

waiting for the --Ohh Im sorry you were right phone call
TUI

That'll come right after the -- I must owe you for a couple of sets brake assemblies phone call.

[ynot slow]

Of course, no one has ever been baffled by the Suzuki clutch-in-to-start trick.

Farkin pretty close though,out of habit when testing a couple of bikes I would pull in the clutch and start,then after buying the bike had it in neutral and hit button,no go,pull in clutch and voila.

[gammaguy]

lol @ the public

glad im not one of them.....:shifty:

[Forest]

Many years ago, I drove my old Valiant from Ruapehu to Taupo and left the choke stuck on.

I used up almost an entire tank of gas in the process!

[skidMark]

Hey frosty heard the one about the guy who sells young fellas dodgy vehicles and sells them based on lies and false promises???

Maybe they should take his license to sell away aye frosty.

[Mully]

Hey frosty heard the one about the guy who sells young fellas dodgy vehicles and sells them based on lies and false promises???

Maybe they should take his license to sell away aye frosty.

I think the record is stuck, Skid

[CookMySock]

Dont say a word. ---Quietly coat break pedal in chalk dust.
I suggest we go for a test drive --ooooh ur a sneaky bastard!!! There aint no pulen the wool over yer eyes... :pinch:

Steve

[MSTRS]

Many years ago, I drove my old Valiant from Ruapehu to Taupo and left the choke stuck on.

I used up almost an entire tank of gas in the process!

No No...it's not a 'choke'...it's a Courtsey hanger. And all Valiants were hungry on gas.
:msn-wink:

[Fatjim]

Hey frosty heard the one about the guy who sells young fellas dodgy vehicles and sells them based on lies and false promises???

Maybe they should take his license to sell away aye frosty.

Even frosty can't resist selling shit to dickheads.

[CB ARGH]

Dumber and dumberer volume two. :oi-grr:

[Rodney007]

Hey frosty heard the one about the guy who sells young fellas dodgy vehicles and sells them based on lies and false promises???

Maybe they should take his license to sell away aye frosty.

hmmmmmmmmmn?

[FROSTY]

I could tell ya a heap of those stories.
Theres one guy a couple of years back. He came back to me to complain his tyres had worn out waaay too fast -aparently they were running at about 75psi when the tyre guy checked em.
Er ok Gosh Im really sorry. Then we check the sales records.
Sir um we sold you your car 2 years and er 35000km ago.
Have you never checked your tyre pressures??

[martybabe]

Amusing but frightening stuff Frosty.

Maybe true maybe not but a salesman once told me he had an old dear that wanted to trade her 20 years owned Ford Anglia . She thought it was a bit slow, it suited her husband but since he'd passed she thought she'd go for something with a bit more go and 4 gears as opposed to the two she was used to !

A little taken aback, he explained that her Anglia had four gears already, surely she had noticed in 20 years of driving it. "I think your mistaken my dear, my Husband said I only needed a car with 2 gears, I always thought it was a bit noisy on the motorway though !". :laugh:

It has the ring of an urban myth about it but I like it anyway, it sounds like my Mom.

[Dooly]

Amusing but frightening stuff Frosty.

Maybe true maybe not but a salesman once told me he had an old dear that wanted to trade her 20 years owned Ford Anglia . She thought it was a bit slow, it suited her husband but since he'd passed she thought she'd go for something with a bit more go and 4 gears as opposed to the two she was used to !

A little taken aback, he explained that her Anglia had four gears already, surely she had noticed in 20 years of driving it. "I think your mistaken my dear, my Husband said I only needed a car with 2 gears, I always thought it was a bit noisy on the motorway though !". :laugh:

It has the ring of an urban myth about it but I like it anyway, it sounds like my Mom.

Some years back there was an old lady around here who drove a mint Austin A30.
She only used 1st and 2nd.
You could hear her coming from miles away!!!!:no::laugh:

[Mikkel]

Some years back there was an old lady around here who drove a mint Austin A30.
She only used 1st and 2nd.
You could hear her coming from miles away!!!!:no::laugh:

She lived in our home town, half-way around the planet, too. She used the speeder as a go button and the clutch as the accelerator :no:

[Brian d marge]

born again biker , brand new gold wing 1500se wanted the chrome doo dads etc ...a few days later the bike was in the shop under warranty , new brakes , clutch , ... the levers/his riding style ,,,kept the front brake on ....he kept riding it untill he welded the clutch basket together ,,,

how he rode the bike is beyond me

Stephen

[Gremlin]

And you think its just vehicle owners?

I manage over 100 servers, desktops and laptops... I've had some amusing ones alright...

[Maki]

We purchased a car that had done 50.000km and changed the brake pads soon thereafter, at something like 55.000. It's now done 125.000 and still has those same pads :niceone: